#para educator

She's normally a very cheerful if timid kid, being happy to talk with adults she knows, getting shy and nervous when talking about feelings, and being anxious about getting hurt. There's a history of kids in the halls not paying attention when rushing from one class to the next and knocking her over. That's why we try to leave class early and get to the next before the bell.

Today, we were only halfway down the hall when the bell rings and kids come pouring out and rushing past. No problem. I, unlike her last para, am fully willing to body block for this student, and shoulder check an inconsiderate kid to the ground if I must. So I'm walking a step ahead of my student, at a slight angle to give her room for her cane, and have her between me and the wall, because I may be short, but I am HEAVY, and I will be a wall.

So we're walking, a few kids bounce off me because they are that unobservant. And my student goes "oh man, there's so many loud kids! I hope I don't get knocked over and fall!" And of course I reassure her, and tell her i don't want her to get bumped, and that's why I'm walking the way I am, so they bump me instead.

And she nods and, I shit you not, goes "yeah! Or I can get them with my cane!" And starts swinging her cane right in front of me, managing to reach just far enough that I'm not at risk for getting tripped, and a kid comes rushing out of a room and would have definitely ran into me, if my students cane hadn't smacked his feet and made him stumble before I can tell her not to.

I'm contemplating moving into Special Education or getting my Master's but I don't know if it's worth it.

Things I experienced today as a Special Education Paraeducator

1. I told one of the people that I work with that I'm really grateful that the teaching certification program I'm going to is only 1 year because I couldn't have done another 2 years of college, I barely made it through my BA which took me 6, and that I had to do another 2 I'd have dropped out. She insisted that I'd have been fine.

So, I reminded her that I have ADHD and that doing my BA was extra hard because of my ADHD. I explained that I was changing majors all the time as well as schools. She told me "all young people do that," I told her I attended college between the ages of 20 and 26 much older than your average student. She repeated that it wasn't my ADHD it was just because I was young.

She's wrong, it absolutely was due to my ADHD, you don't repeat classes because you don't understand the course work just because "you were young" you also don't impulsively change schools because you're tired of the one you're at because "you were young." You also don't almost flunk classes because you couldn't do your final paper because it was too much work in one chunk and you waited too long to get started because "you were young"

Like fuck off Karen (that's her actual name) and shut the hell up your opinion has no bearing on my lived experiences.

2. Same bitch insisted that the kid with CP whom I've been working with for 4 months couldn't have deliberately refused to eat solid foods until I informed him that his mom told me he could eat solids and I would no longer be blending his food because "his brain doesn't work like that, he's not capable of premeditation".

Like really Karen, REALLY. Because first of all Cerebral Palsy is a PHYSICAL disability and while some people with CP do have cognitive disorders there is nothing in this student's file to indicate that he does. Not to mention that while he's not capable of speech he is completely capable of following directions and answering grade-level reading questions.

So you're telling me that a 3rd-grade boy didn't think he would get away with not chewing (something that's physically challenging but important for him to do) as long as he could because he had a new teacher who didn't know better just because he has a PHYSICAL disability? That's what you're telling me?

3. Overheard her comparing her Autistic nephew to Rainman and talking about him as if he was 10 when I asked how old he was she informed me he's 47.

This bitch is getting a teaching degree with a special education endorsement, she wants to teach Special Education...like WHAT THE EVER LOVING FUCK!

She seems to think that because she works in sped and likes kids with special needs she'll make a good special education teacher but no bitch FUCK NO!

You can't just like special needs kids, you have to ADVOCATE for them, you have to treat them as EQUALS, you have to respect their autonomy, and you have to see them as INDIVIDUALS capable of complex thought and motivations.

Just fuck you, Karen, no wonder kids hate school, and no wonder adults leave special education with horror stories if this is the kind of mother fucking cunt getting teaching positions.

I’ve had some time to sit on it and I’m a huge soundtrack fan, but it’s literally one verse that keeps bringing me back.

“Picture if you can a younger you

Think of how that little soul would feel if they could see you

There's no doubt their jaw would drop and say, "Oh, wow"

You're more than you had ever dreamed you'd be

But sometimes we get caught in the trap where we can't see

Our own strength and beauty.”

So I'm a para at a middle school in the special ed department. We got one kid who, for behavior, has to have a 1-1 para all the time. We're gonna call him Beetlejuice, cuz if he's gone and we say his name to many times, he just shows up out of nowhere. I usually have him at the end of the day, and another para, who we're gonna call Mrs. Holiday cuz she goes all out for literally every holiday, has him in the morning.

So today was a reward field trip for good behavior. Beetlejuice can't go because he has referrals. But Mrs. Holiday got Beetlejuices dad to sign one anyway. And he's all excited to go on this field trip, until we have to say, "uh, Mrs. Holiday was wrong, should have NEVER had your dad sign that, because they're gonna check the list and you AREN'T going to be on it." So Beetlejuice starts flipping out. He spends the next two hours cussing Mrs. Holiday out. The other kids are gone, he's litterally the only student in our classroom, with me and mrs. Holiday.

He's saying shit like "you're a waste of sperm" "just shut up and die" "you're a fucking ugly bitch". And he just keeps going and going, and finally admin comes in and pulls him away and they have a talk with him and call his parents. Turns out admin said he HAS to go home, and they strongly suggest he just... go on summer vacation early.

Well he comes back to the classroom, totally normal, and tells us he's going on break early and his dad is coming. So I'm like, might as well try and get some work out of him now that he's calm, and ask "okay, well, why don't we do a little work before dad gets here and see if we can git in some choice too." And Beetlejuice looks at me, shugs, and goes, "okay".

And he sits down. Just like that. He was screaming obscenities at us for two hours, because of a mistake Mrs. Holiday made, and now that he gets to go home, he's super chill. So I'm just like, FUCK IT, grab his work binder, and as soon as I sit down with him, the principal walks in to tell me his dad is here.

And Beetlejuice goes "ugh! We just got the binder!"

And I'm holding in my own obscenities, as I walk him down the hall to the office, and he's all chill. And then he throws in the "Man, we were just about to do binder," while we're walking in the hall.