#panthaleia

The Novel I'm Not Writing About DGM & Buddhism

Oooooookay, first things first! The four bubbles across Allen's collar on the cover page say 生々流転 seiseiruten. When spelled 生生流転 (homophonous), it simply means "ever-changing," but when spelled the way it is here (fantastic catch, thank you so much @togaochi​ ♥), it's defined as "all things being in flux through the endless circle of birth, death, and rebirth; the circle of transmigration​."

That concept is much more succinctly described by the Sanskrit term saṃsāra. Now, to preclude confusion: yes, if you look up "samsara" in a Japanese dictionary, you'll get 輪廻 rin'ne rather than this. That said, this term is if anything more specific and descriptive than that one. See also 生死輪廻 seishirin'ne, which has the exact same definition as seiseiruten; think "cell" vs. “cellular phone” vs "mobile telephone." All words for the same thing, with varying degrees of descriptiveness. 

The concept of samsara shows up in several religions (notably Buddhism, Hindu, and Jainism). The one most relevant to DGM by far is Buddhism, and this is far from the first time I've run into it in search of answers.

Crash course on some Buddhist jargon for those of you who aren't familiar:

The word samsara, meaning "continuous flow," describes the beginningless and potentially endless cycle of life and existence, through birth and living and death to re-birth and so on. It could also easily be pictured as a helix, if you'd prefer, and that could in fact make some of DGM a little easier to understand.

(If I may take a moment to get super self-indulgent here: a very related philosophical concept is panta rhei, "everything flows", which is what my "panthaleia" handle is mostly based on. This chapter very nearly literally has my name written on it. IT'S A SIGN. Of.... something. Not sure what, exactly, but IT'S A SIGN.)

Every living thing is trapped within this cycle by its attachments and its ignorance of the truth, which causes great suffering and generates karma, which then affects the shape of one's next life. (Yes, Alma's second name is that for a reason.)

There are a number of branching denominations of Buddhism, much as there are of Christianity, and while they mostly share certain core tenets such as the Eightfold Path, they vary widely in ideals and practice. The influences I see on DGM mostly come from a Japanese variant called Shingon ("True Words") and its predecessors: Shingon is a descendant of Tibetan Vajrayana, which is in turn sometimes considered to be part of the broader East Asian Mahayana umbrella.  

I've talked a little bit about Shingon before, because all the chanted spells used throughout the series follow the pattern of Shingon mantras and Kanda's tattoo is written in Siddhaṃ (theorized to be the predecessor of both modern kana systems, by the way).

Shingon shares its overarching goal with its predecessors: rather than seeking to break the cycle just for one's own self and achieve individual escape from suffering (as in Theravada, for example), one should seek to become an enlightened being — a bodhisattva — and willingly continue to subject oneself to the cycle in order to help those who are struggling and thereby bring the whole world closer to moksha ("liberation") and subsequent/synonymous nirvana one step at a time.

Obviously, reincarnation and transmigration play a massive role in DGM. Let me list just a few of the ways in which this particular concept is a running theme throughout the story:

The Noah fragments being reincarnated into new bodies without also reincarnating the human souls they previously coexisted with;

The Earl's victims having their souls transmigrated in the bodies of their loved ones to rebirth them as Akuma;

The Third Exorcists, also transmigrated into new bodies to bring them back (Helix magic in general, really, including the Atuuda);

Nea's transmigration into Allen (not a rebirth, but an avoidance of death while waiting for a chance at rebirth), as well as Allen's regression to childhood via de-aging and memory loss;

The original Earl (Adam in my theories, fyi, in case I reference that later) deliberately rebirthing himself in smaller pieces for goals as yet unknown;

The Bookmen keeping records of each iteration of the repeating narrative, ever-changing but eternal themselves;

Even fukkin Komlin, lmao, constantly destroyed and improved and remade.

So many others? Soooo many others.

The eureka moment (for me): this chapter is subtitled "Curtain Rise," as in the beginning of a stage play when the curtain goes up. If you'll think all the way back to the very first chapters of the series, you may remember that the Earl's Scenario is meant to bring about curtain fall... on humanity.

Looking at that in the context of samsara, that whole thing suddenly looks very different. Our heroes assumed that the Earl's victory would result in the destruction of the world, the destruction of humanity, but I've never bought that idea from the very start. When the curtains finally close on samsara, the cycle of death and rebirth, humanity will not be "dead" in the tragic sense, but free. Nirvana =/= death. Nirvana is the peace of being one with all, knowing all, loving and being loved by all without the need for suffering. It isn't "heaven" in the Christian sense, but it is an end to suffering, without also being an end to existence.

Tragedy and suffering are the consequences of remaining bound to the cycle. Directly using the energy of them in order to break the cycle creating them, as the Earl claims to be doing with the Akuma, is a very very Vajrayana idea, and fits seamlessly into my existing suppositions as to what the Earl is doing and why. Here, have a relevant quote:

Negative mental factors such as desire, hatred, greed, pride are not rejected as in non-Tantric Buddhism, but are used as part of the path. As noted by French Indologist Madeleine Biardeau, tantric doctrine is "an attempt to place kama, desire, in every meaning of the word, in the service of liberation."

 And another, from the Hevajra tantra:

Those things by which evil men are bound, others turn into means and gain thereby release from the bonds of existence. By passion the world is bound, by passion too it is released.

One more, same source:

One knowing the nature of poison may dispel poison with poison.

Bluntly put, I think the (original) Earl was an enlightened soul — a bodhisattva — who voluntarily returned to the cycle via deliberate rebirth into multiple ignorant beings in order to help heal the struggling world of its suffering via bringing about enlightenment viiiaaaa SUFFERING HARDER. Good Plan™?

Here are a few more related meta posts from a few years ago, just so I can find them again when I inevitably decide to delve deeper into this:

Helix magic will be the key to the plot

It's all happened before

Destroyer of Time

2.) I'm so delighted to see Mana as he was when Allen knew him before, genteel and whimsical and delighted with Allen's existence. It's easy to understand why Allen would become so attached to him.

3.) Raws for the "Therefore I write many of them, as if God can see me doing so. / As if He might find me" lines: こうして神さまに見えるように沢山書くんです　／　見つけてもらえるように  These don’t sit well with me, so I’ll probably change them in the future. The gist is that he’s drawing them in order to draw God’s attention to him.

Raws for "Here I am": 私はここにいる。@togaochi and I concur that he uses watashi here instead of his own preferred boku because he's teaching it to Allen, and means it as a more general "I."

Anyway: hooooo boy, here's some more evidence for the Two Gods theory. And how!

It seems pretty safe to assume he's not calling out to the Order's God, since that god would pretty happily wipe him off the face of the earth. The Noah have called that god "false," though, and expressed their intent and desire to kill it, while still referring to a "God" entity of their own whom they regard as being on their side (or perhaps, they're on its side).

Mana calling out to the Noah god to come find him, without remembering why he wants that, is very interesting. I wonder if and how anyone answered him.

4.) I have a strong hunch that Mana's "secret alphabet" is also related to Siddhaṃ, but that language is written in such a complex way that it's actually impossible for me to be sure without just... learning it. Which! To be clear! I fucking well might. WATCH ME.

5.) This entire scene is so much to me. How furious they both are that the other won't just let themselves be saved/protected. Allen wanted to leave Kanda behind so he and the others would be safe from everything that's hunting him. Kanda wants Allen to stay put so they can save him from what he can't fight alone. All that rage and frustration, because they care.

Quick note: in the first draft we initially posted on Imgur via our Discord server, I had the subject wrong for one of Kanda's lines here, which I caught and fixed. Sorry for any confusion that may have caused!

5.5) ETA: Forgot to mention that I’m fairly sure the beautiful Grecian-style temple they’re hanging out in is referenced from St. Bernard’s Well, again in Edinburgh. Excuse me, “Edinston.”

Thanks to an enterprising anon, we have a much better match for that structure: the Dugald Stewart Monument! 

6.) "maybe I'll go sucker-hunting" CARD SHARK ALLEN LIIIIIVES, where's Tyki when you need him (to lose his shirt again)

7.) fjkldjlkagd the turnaround where Allen finally cracks and is like "fine!! you want in?? IN YOU GET. no take-backsies! happy now???" and Kanda's like "yep, here I am" and neither of them have ANY IDEA how to deal with ANY OF IT. Kanda struggling to pull Allen's story out of him without throwing up his hands and quitting. Allen baffled and twice as guarded as before, put off by Kanda's uncharacteristic interest.

So beautiful, it brings a tear to my eye. (Actually, many tears. So... so many tears.)

8.) That apology, which I never thought I'd get, for Allen having seen what Kanda would never have consented to show him. It wasn't his fault, and they both know that, but the fact still remains that it was a violation, and I've always always wished for that to be addressed somehow and HERE IT IS. RIGHT HERE.

I want to tattoo that look on Kanda's face onto my brain.

9.) And then they're FUCKING INTERRUPTED, AGAIN

But Allen's "ask me again when we're done dealing with this" was such a promise of trust that I can't even be that mad, augh.

Onward to the bitter end, I guess!! Haha!!!! · ͜͜  · - 

1.) I have been informed that the cityscape referenced in the opening setting panels here is Edinburgh, Scotland:

Edinburgh is in fact in Scotland, buuuut this is somewhat complicated by the fact that Hoshino-sensei did something weird with the naming here (wow, shock). 

Though she calls London "London" and Paris "Paris" and is therefore presumably fine with giving real-world cities their real-world names, she calls the town our heroes just landed in "Edinston" rather than "Edinburgh" and says it's in "Igirisu," which is a Japanese world describing both the United Kingdom and — more commonly — England in particular. There are existing Japanese words for both "Scotland" and "Edinburgh," and they are notably not used. 

To be as safe as possible, I've transliterated the town name directly and used "Britain" wherever "Igirisu" was used, to leave the door open for either possibility to be true. 

As for Allen's nationality: that's still up in the air, too, because this town is only where he met Mana in the circus and the events of Lost Fragment of Snow transpired, not where he was born or where he joined up. He's definitely from somewhere in the UK, but beyond that? Pick your favourite and have fun, haha.  

2.) HALLELUJAH AMEN, IT'S RAINING MEN (enjoy those nightmares, kids! :D)

3.) Oh my god, they forgot the bracelets. Rest in pieces. 

(Also: the implication that if Komui had made them they were probably broken because things Komui makes work so terribly well the people whose lives they're meant to improve often end up worse off in the end is both hilarious and painful. See: Komurin. But because Reever made it, coming off is a failsafe meant to protect the users from unforeseen circumstances, because he actually thinks things all the way through most of the time.)

4.) "the ground smells different" I mean okay to be entirely fair, this is a real thing that I've noticed myself, but this is still... so funny.... such a dog person thing to say.....

5.) The "one more step" line was more literally "if you intend to keep running any more than this," with the implication that Kanda would rather just kill him right now and have done than take one more step in his pursuit. (Kandas are natural sprinters; very dangerous over short distances.)

6.) lmao

Allen: okay are you going to save me or kill me, please choose one

Kanda: both? both is good

8.) Okay now for a bit of the kind of thing I actually make these posts for:

"神の結晶" (kami no kesshou) is a very interesting term that was first (and possibly only ever the once, I still haven't read all the raws) used in chapter 007, during Komui's guided tour of the Order:

Komui: A substance of mysterious power some call the "crystal of God."

The fun thing about this is that while pretty much everyone opted to translate kesshou as "crystal" — the "crystal of God" — the word also (and more often) means "crystallization (of)". As in, Innocence is the crystallized and shattered body of God. 

Funnily enough, when I went back to 197 to find a panel for the next point, I also found this while skimming:

Image

Guro!Tokusa: We [AKUMA] will [kill/destroy] God (f: the Innocence).

The kanji say "God", the furigana say "Innocence," and that is what Hoshino does when things are meaningfully related and/or synonymous. By destroying the Innocence, they are killing God, because the Innocence was not made by God, but of God.

Soooo since this is my translation and that felt like a Sign, I'm going with "crystallization," to hell with it.

 9.) This part is new favourite ever, oh my god. Kanda not only understanding the feelings of others, but trying to teach empathy to Allen?? Oh, how the turntables~! 

And then!! Allen accusing Kanda of sticking his nose in where it isn't welcome, and Kanda's like "POT, KETTLE, ASSHOLE" because this is exactly what Allen did to/for him in North America over Alma. "Call this payback for what you said" refers to this bit in 197:

Allen: You're not even trying to face Alma head-on...

Kanda: Now who isn't facing things head-on?

ALSOOOO the callback to chapter 005, wherein Kanda cut Allen's arm with Mugen for an entirely different reason:

Allen's self-sacrificing hypocrisy, however well meant, is being called out increasingly hard as the story goes on, and I'm all about it. He keeps trying to make people's decisions for them, and though it's true that he's doing it because he's scared for them, it's still not at all his call to make. He's treating them like children, not his friends, and ignoring their very clearly stated wish to see this through with him, but even so they're standing firm on the decisions they made for themselves. justcommunication.mp3

9.) And the flipside: despite his terror of seeing his loved ones hurt, he actually is still properly scared for himself and desperately doesn't want to be alone. Their presence made everything both worse for him (because they cranked up the stakes even higher being within impact range) and better (because he wasn't alone in the sightless, murderous dark). His torn heart here is so real and it hurts just to watch. In the best of ways.

10.) Aaaand there's where the "fool" line comes back in: when Allen accepts that he's guilty of exactly the same thing he took Kanda to task for, and they've just exchanged shoes. This chapter is a gift to me personally, thank you Hoshino-no-kami.  

11.) He's grieving for Tim properly now, thank god. This is tremendously painful too, but so much better than the blank dissociation from before. Now he can walk on through the rest of the grieving process with everything moving within him as it should. 

12.) I definitely thought for a hot minute that the Mana-marked tree was Cornelia and he jumped them straight to the mansion, but it's definitely not. It's in a small square in a city, whereas Cornelia is on the vast Canbell property, and it wouldn't make any sense for the circus to have been parked on the front lawn of the place Mana ran away from. So the plot isn't jumping ahead quite as fast as I initially thought, but it is going somewhere!! For real!!!

13.) The little "is your stomach empty, too" aside is because he thinks Allen is grubbing around in the dirt for food. (Take a glance at the fancy ants and maybe... try a few? ♫) 

14.) Furigana on "Allen" in "where Allen was born" say "I," and "born" really says "hajimari", "beginning". I took a tiny bit of poetic liberty on that one and I don't think it'll affect anything but if it does, now you know.

What a killer chapter, I'm so delighted. January is going to be amazing. 

1.) Cover: LOVE YOU TOO, DUMBSHIT ♥

2.) Wait, since when can the present change the past? I stared at this for a while to make sure I had it right and yeah, that's definitely what it says:

現在[f: いま]だけが過去と未来を変えられる genzai (f: ima) dake ga kako to mirai wo kaerareru

w hat

3a.) I goofed up: the town is locked down with talismans, not tighter than the field of one such. Will fix when I can.

3b.) I'm not 100% sure if it should be Operation "Lola" or "Roller;" the katakana say "ro-la-," which could be either. I liked Lola better so I went with that, but if I get proven wrong later, this'll be here to prove I did consider the other possibility. :P

4.) "Only Kanda and the general have left since then" GOSH I WONDER WHERE THEY WENT? GEE

(I mean, I can't really blame them for not suspecting the heretofore impeccably loyal Tiedoll. They're still going to be kicking themselves in a little bit, though.)

5.) RIGHT IN THE SLAMMER, BYE. Hilarious as that was, though, it's really nice to see Kanda use his vicious reputation for good! His embarrassment over the charade probably lent it much of the genuine intimidation factor that chased off the Finders. It was a really effective way to keep them from searching the carriage, though I can't imagine it was fun to be Johnny back there, squished in with a worked-up Kanda and Allen (who was probably quietly goading him, to boot).

Extra note: I realize that "lololol" is extra non-period accurate but Hoshino literally wrote "wwww" there sooooo.

6.) Sweet Krory, hoping so hard he won't actually find them, pretending to look for them anyway to protect his place with the Order. Sad anxious baby. It looks like Chaozii's suspicious, which isn't surprising.

7.) That fukkin stream-of-consciousness background text panel felt like a personal fuck-you from Hoshino to every translator working on this, lmao. God.

ETA: There was actually more of it that we couldn’t fit in there. For real. The full section:

This is the next step. I must not stop. I have to get moving. They're desperate enough to bet their lives on this, after all, but I'm just as desperate to escape. To be frank, the bullets from Master's Judgement  were much more difficult to evade than the debt collectors. I really don't want to go through that again. It was practice, though, and after that, running from the debt collectors has been easy as falling off a log.

To make it clear, his monologue is a flashback from before he fled the Order, so it’s not about his current flight. He’s just talking about the repo men.

8.) Tiedoll and Johnny bonding over the loveliness of a starry sky is both tremendously charming and tremendously sad. Let the Science Division see the sky sometimes, Order?? Maybe???

9.) Allen can't even look at Tim's remains, and Johnny can't look at him because of how much it hurts to do so, this is THE MOST painful thing. I'm crying. I never expected to be this emotional about an animated blob of gold with creepy teeth and no eyes.

10.) My favourite part of the next page is Lujun's little aside on the left margin. YOU TELL 'EM, BUDDY

11.) lmao @ Johnny's eventual lack of surprise over Link being alive because he's a) ex-CROW and b) works for Lvellie?? I'm not sure what Johnny thinks Lvellie is capable of, exactly, but it's clearly more than he probably actually is. Despite his baking prowess, he is not actually magic so far as we know (unlike almost everyone else).

12.) ohhh mannnnn I was wondering if Allen would risk trying to recruit any more allies from the Order despite the risk of Falling, and here's my answer: resounding nope

It's killing me that despite how far he'd come re: relying on his comrades more, not trying to do everything himself, he... actually does kind of have to, this time? He can't trust anyone, himself least of all. There is a clear and present danger to everyone around him should they help him or learn any more than they do know, including but not limited to the Fall and/or Apocryphos' attentions. Kanda should stay behind, with the Order, for all those reasons as well as the current frailty of his used-up, exhausted body. So should Johnny, as he's essentially defenceless, and it's much harder to fight while protecting someone vulnerable. Going it alone is terrible for Allen himself, but the right call for literally every other reason, and I'm in pain.

13.) Okay the flashbacky bits are a little confusing, but most of those lines are from the third Reverse novel, the "Lost Fragments of Snow" story about how Mana and Allen met. I dug up my novel just to make sure of who said which parts of it:

Red: Why aren't you crying? (about Allen-the-dog’s death)

Mana: Guess my tears have all dried up.

Red: Didn't you share your lives? (again, re: Mana and dog)

Mana: If I grieve, the Earl will come... (re: Mana’s scrambled memory around the topic of sorrow summoning the Earl)

Mana: Because you were Allen [the dog's] friend, right? (Mana realizing why Red was crying over Allen-the-dog’s grave)

Allen internalized a lot back then, and in the moment is basically thinking that he can’t allow himself to grieve for Timcanpy, because it might draw the Earl’s attention to him again after he just barely escaped. I’m just. I’m in agony. 

14.)  There's one tiny odd thing in the next bit that might be nothing, but I'll include it just in case anyone else notices it and wonders: Allen does end the I can't tell you anything after all sentence with the "ya" sentence-final particle, which is mostly specific to southern Kansai dialects like Osaka-ben these days, but used to be more common across the country around the time this manga takes place. Old men using it is a bit of a trope in fiction, to show how old they are, lol. He also drawls his “nannimo” (extra n) a bit, which is -- again -- a bit odd. It comes off kind of unusually casual, but then, the rest of the scene is totally in character. I’m not sure what to make of it just yet. If I change it, it would be to something like “Can’t tell you nothin’ after all.”

15.) Poor, poor Johnny. He tries so hard, but he can't seem to keep up with Allen. :((

(T/N: SHAKIRA SHAKIRA)

Onnnn the other hand, I have a feeling Allen is about to pop out of the Ark with Kanda wrapped around his throat right onto the Canbell mansion lawn, so there's... that. They'll probably startle the heck out of Lucia. Gonna be good.

-

And there you have it! No big deep symbolism or huge reveals this time around, just some good old character interaction, but I'm pretty sure it's the gasp of breath before the next storm, so you'd better savour it while you can.

Till next time~~

@panthaleia

2.) Kanda being all annoyed that Johnny didn't summon him when he needed help is just so. Overwhelming. He's come so far! Can you imagine vol. 02 Kanda, Mr. "if you fuck up have fun dying I guess", being mad because someone didn't ask him for help? His character arc has been so damn satisfying. 

3.) Tiedoll's greeting in Japanese was "Yaa," which I had to struggle not to translate as "yo" or "sup." Cool as a cucumber, that guy.

4.) Allen suspecting Johnny and Kanda of still being loyal to the Order stung so much. This from the guy who's been willing to trust the literal enemy in the past. Seeing him reduced to suspecting Johnny, who is so obviously genuinely devoted to him (to the point of dropping his entire life to follow him), is so upsetting. :((

5.) That "culprit invocating this prison carriage" line is going to haunt me, oh my god. I know it doesn't sound like something anyone would ever say in English, I know, but it was honestly the best I could do. The original Japanese was this: 目の前にこの檻馬車を発動してる張本人がいるんです Me no mae ni kono oribasha wo hatsudoushiteru chouhonnin ga irun desu

Oribasha is an invented compound of "prison/gaol" and "carriage," chouhonnin means "perpetrator/ringleader/originator," and of course hatsudou is the word used throughout the series for the invocation of Innocence. I could not find a way to translate that less literally and still keep all the meaning, so I had to lean more literal than readable this time. Sigh.

6.) Yes, I realize that "kick his ass and bust out" is rather Red-like of Allen, despite the Mana-like tone of much of the rest of his lines in this chapter, but uh.

ぶっとばして逃げるに決ってるでしょ Buttobashite nigeru ni kimatteru desho

I didn't take all that many liberties with this one, tbh. It’s a very shounen line.

7.) Ohhhh nooooo, Krory. ;A; Chaozii won't mind fighting Allen at all, considering his opinion of our bleeding heart hero, but Krory obviously minds very much and I'm really worried that Allen won't manage to give them the slip and he'll have to fight against his friends in the Order directly. That would be excruciating, soooo Hoshino's probably drawing it as we speak.

8.) Kanda and Allen snarking at each other while trying to murder each other (but not murder Johnny) in a magic carriage driven by fairy godmother Tiedoll is pretty much everything I've ever wanted in my life. The end, bye.

9.) Allen saying hurtful things in order to push them away for their own safety is so painful but also so so lovely. He's too good for his own good, honestly. And then realizing what he’d done but miserably sticking to his guns. I could weep.

10.) Can I just point that Kanda has like half a dozen speech bubbles in a row that are just [GRITTED TEETH] followed by an insult and then a threat of violence. That pretty much sums up my boy's way with the world, doesn't it.

11.) Honestly, thank god Johnny's here. They'd never get anywhere without him to mediate between their high-strung, dysfunctional asses.

12.) The whole page with Tiedoll gently and teasingly encouraging Kanda to talk to someone like a human being is just beautiful. He's just like "hey I know you're super bad at this but it's a skill you're about to need a lot soooo do your best my son! I believe in u!" Best fairy godmother.

13.) Oh my god, the """"""salt."""""" I hadn't slept the night before and was literally so out of it when I got to this page that I didn't realize it wasn't actually salt until way later and it was awful. I actually thought at first that Johnny and Allen had misheard Tiedoll's shoikomu (to shoulder something, take it on, see something through) as shiokomu (shio = salt), and had a whole punny wordplay there regarding "betraying the salt," but blessed @togaochi gently steered me back to reality. After that we just made terrible salt jokes and now I need someone to photoshop Tiedoll's face onto Salt Bae because of reasons.

ETA: The splendiferous @krorys comes through again:

14.) I love how Kanda asks what the fuck Apocryphos is and then... answers his own question, lmao? He actually might know more than Allen at this point, I think?? At least until Allen recovers all his memories. So I have to wonder if Kanda only asked his questions to ease his way into telling Allen that Tim had ~returned to dust~ because he knew Allen would be really sad and wasn’t looking forward to it. 

15.) Relatedly, if Allen ends up crying on someone's shoulder in the next chapter I will Die.

16.) That last line of narration on the last page:

相棒の変わり果てた姿。。。 Aibou no kawarihateta sugata...

Togaochi saved my ass again here, because I initially translated this as if it were something homophonous with it but with one different kanji:

相棒の代わり果てた姿。。。 Aibou no kawari hateta sugata...

Which would have meant "The form of that which met its end in its partner's place." 

Kawarihateta as a compound verb, however, means "to have changed form completely," as in "to have become unrecognizable." Which actually is not as firm about Tim being permadead as I thought it was at first. There's still some hope! Some!!

—