#oxy30

i hate when my bf comes home drunk, at first it’s fine and dandy. He’s being sweet and he wants to make love. So we have amazing sex, I’ve been fucking on the couch to the floor back to the couch. We both finish at the same time. And then all hell just… Breaks loose.. he yells at me, threatened to steal something, pits his hands on me. i let him getaway with “dirty slut” or “i know you like that bitch” SOMETIMES during fucking or love making. but it was just too much tonight. i cried as i whipped his but off of me, alone in that bathroom. just to walk out to him get physically and mentally abused continuously. i even gave him what he wanted it’s never enough man... idek what to do anymore. stay with him for the benefits (car, ride to plays and dispo, blunts, sex). this is not real love. “fucking fat ugly bitch” doesn’t translate to “i love you babygirl” last tine i checked. sos. thank goodness for a bump and a piece of a xan. goodnight. 🌙 #sad #vent #journaling #addict #victim #badlove #anxiety #depression #PTSD 🌪