Desmond: You know how it's only champagne if it's from the French town of Champagne? And otherwise, it's sparkling wine?

Clay: Yeah?

Desmond: I wish more things were like that.

Clay: What do you mean?

Desmond: For example. Someone isn't a wanker unless they're from the French town of Wanqer. Otherwise, they're just a sparkling fuckwit.

Clay: *snorts a laugh*

*Federico and Ezio stop their conversation, looking over, interested.*

Desmond: He's not your fiancee unless he's from the French town of Fiance. Otherwise, he's just a sparkling future husband.

*Federico, Ezio, and Clay laugh*

Desmond: Or as I prefer to call it, a brosecco.

*Wheezing laughter*

Desmond: It's only as pussy if it's from the Poosay region of France, otherwise it's just a-

Clay cuts in, red in the face from laughter: Sparkling cunt!

All four break down in laughter, eyes watering, gasping in air.

Finished? Who knows. Idk.

He is a little shit

Murdered Vront

Marcus: That's less than half from last week.

1. Name of your muse.

Narya Ralaferin Lavellan

2. One picture you like of your muse’s fc.

3. Two headcanons you have for your muse that you never told anyone.

- Narya likes to sleep naked sometimes. Not at winter time and in the cold Skyhold, but at summer time , at Camps she sleeps naked. 

- sometimes she just wants to forget everything and she goes to the tavern to drink and play cards until on the early morning hours someone escorts/carries her to bed (probably Cullen or Dorian)

4. Three things that your muse loves doing in their free time.

- Walks in the forest. 

-Tending the garden 

- Studying magic

5. Four people that your muse loves ( no specific order ).

-Keeper of the Lavellan Clan 

-Varric 

-Dorian 

-Solas

6. Three fond childhood memories.

- First time she went to the forest with her dad to collect some wild herbs. Her dad picked up a wild lavender bloom and tucked it behind her ear. 

- When she first got her first staff and instantly blew up poor Gilvan's stew that he was cooking outside. 

- The day she got her first bow from her dad. "Magic can fail you."he had said and thought her how to shoot.

7. Two things your muse regrets.

-Never seeing her parents again after the day she left. 

-Being on the conclave when it blew up. 

8. One thing they’d go through heaven or hell to save/change.