#openwordsblog

Feeling down and feeling the dark clouds are not the problem. The challenge is the problem. Fix the problem.

Feeling self conscious. One of the Xxxxxx made a comment about me being a walking encyclopaedia. It made me think if he was mocking me or not. I've felt like that with him once before. Both times, Xxxxx has been around and I've felt like they must see me as below par. Perhaps Xxxxx being there wouldn't have made a difference. Perhaps they would have thought that anyway. I'm not as in touch with reality as I think I am. I don't pick up on things as quickly as others. Don't have/know the words to express myself. I don't have enough drive to learn as much as others, only what I need to. I get frustrated when I don't understand something. I lash out, which makes me childish. My knowledge is and remains limited. Within conversation, I deflect and try to manage conversations. I react quickly. I overreact, positively and negatively, to so much. Most things don't need the reaction I give it. Most things I don't care about as much as I portray. The thought of it makes me want to remove myself from group situations. I will remind myself to try and hold back to a degree and react appropriately. I would like to create a new habit for myself.

All the peace you’ll ever need in your entire life is already in you right now.