#ooc message

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Personal ramble below

I drew Riventale's Sans because he's a big boy who needs some GATDANG ATTENTION, ok?

Don't go changin', bby

I don't generally go OOC, as a rule, but it's come to my attention that @egonspenglerofficial has been getting some pretty hateful anonymous messages, and I felt it was important to say something about that. Because acting like that is NOT okay.

Look, I get that the storyline is heartbreaking. I get that people are disappointed. But, it also accurately portrays how incompatibility on some pretty basic levels in a relationship is still a factor, even when two people love each other. Love is messy. Relationships are messy.

This muse is being written as a touch-averse ace, so this turn of events should come as no surprise.

But on the broader scale, these events also comprise a story. The muses are fictional. None of this is real. But, the muns ARE real. That they evoke such emotional reactions is a testament to how well they write their muses, but just because anyone and everyone here has such easy and open access to them doesn't mean that basic respect and manners can be tossed aside.

Love means wanting what's best for the person you love. And sometimes, it still needs some hard, critical examination, because love means that sometimes, you have to accept that you're not the right one for the person you love, and for what THEIR needs are in a relationship. I know that movies often glorify giving everything up for someone - including your own needs - but in the end, whittling yourself away for the sake of another is NOT a healthy way forward. For someone to demand that is just plain selfish. And love CANNOT be that and still deserve to be called love.

Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do for a person is to recognize incompatibility, and let them go. Of COURSE it hurts in the short term. But, it saves them suffering from that incompatibility in the long run. I know from copious personal experience what it's like to be with the wrong person. I (the mun, not my muse) can be a bit touch-averse, too. Not to this extent, but I know perfectly well how badly people react when I reject physical contact. Forcing people to take it anyway is cruel. Shouting insults that they're incapable of love - also cruel. Not to mention untrue. There are many ways to express love. But, I guess only certain types get much respect, and maybe it's time that we, as a culture, take a good, hard look at that.

So, while it might be tempting to shout at the muses, there's no getting around the fact that every muse is an intangible construct. The mun behind the muse, however, is very real, and so are THEIR feelings. They are the ones who have to soak up whatever everyone sends to the muse. And the muns don't deserve the abuse - especially when the muses don't deserve it either, because the mun is not the muse, any more than the actor is the character they play.