#ohbthr

Arrgh: I sometimes wonder if hell has inflation.

Of-sevenseas: ?

Arrgh: considering the amount of money some of these people try to burn to their ancestors

Lazulisong: It does actually. The denominations have risen on the bills I read. I was reading up on Hell money the other day in case I wanted to make a joke about bribing Shen Wei

Moderndaypandora: it must be somebody other than ZYL making the joke, he'd just bribe him with his body

Lazulisong: Well ZYL does bribe messengers and workers. And Shen Wei can apparently interact with burnt offerings

Kitsunec4: And like 888 folded lotus flowers. And paper houses. And paper cars.

Arrgh: Paper iPhones too, which strikes me as completely hilarious. WAIT ZYL ABSOLUTELY BURNS SW AN IPHONE

Moderndaypandora: with a drawn on text from Ah Lan 😘😘?

Arrgh: YES

Moderndaypandora: the new way to send nudes

“Um, Petra? Not that I’m not happy to see you and all,but…why are you outside my window at 11pm? Also, like, how? This is thefifteenth story and I’m pretty sure it was closed-”

“Haaaarrrrry! No time to explain!” Petra hopped insidethrough the window she’d somehow jiggered open. Classic Petra Parker. “I needyou to help me with something.”

Harriet squinted suspiciously at Petra. “What, likehomework? Did you forget your textbook at school again?”

“It’s a curse,” said Petra

“I dunno, it’s only been like three or four times, doesn’tseem that bad-”

“No, I’ve been cursed.Like, magic.” Petra yanked down the neck of her sweater to show off a line ofshining blue runes right above her heart. Harriet tried really hard not tostare.

“How did thathappen?”

“Loki,” said Petra, as if that was an adequate answer. Cometo think of it, maybe it was. Loki probably cursed a dozen random New Yorkersevery day. Ugh, Loki was the worst.

“Sooooo, what do you want me to help with?” asked Harriet.“It’s not like I can read that.”

“Not a problem,” said Petra cheerfully, “I got Thor totranslate for me.”

“How did you get the actualgoddess of thunder-”

“No time to explain!” Petra interjected hurriedly. “Know agal who knows a gal, Stark Industries internship, etc. etc. Anyway!!!”

Harriet waited for Petra to say something. Petra didn’t.

“Aaannyway?” Harriet prompted.

“Oh, right. Yeah. Uh.” Petra ran a hand through her hair,absentmindedly mussing it up. It was so cute Harriet wanted to die every timeshe did it. “Apparently it’s a bit of classic Asgardian poetry from one oftheir fairy tales. Or maybe it’s a history book? Library filing has got to be apain on Asgard – do you think they have an ancient Norse dewey decimal system?”

“You are such a dork,” Harriet told her. It came outsounding even fonder than she’d meant. Whoops.

“I don’t remember the whole thing, there were a lot ofrhymes, but, um, apparently the gist is that I have to kiss a “maiden fair” in“day’s last hour”? Or else Loki’s going to turn me into a pig and it’ll bepretty hard to get anyone to kiss me then, probably.”

“…oh,” said Harriet.

“Yeah,” said Petra. “Like: I know. You can see why I had to come here.”

“Sure. Of course.” Harriet grabbed her phone and opened upher contacts list. “You want the number of all the single girls on thecheerleading squad, or just the ones I know kiss girls? And is that “maiden”thing literal, because I could narrow it down with that, plus I’m pretty sure you don’t want to kiss Gina,so that leaves-”

“No, that’s not it!” Petra grabbed for Harriet’s phone andended up with her whole hand instead. “Look, if I just wanted to kiss somerandom girl I could probably get Lucy or Dani to do or even, ugh, Samantha, but Ididn’t, I thought…I didn’t want to kiss just anybody for my first kiss ok?”

“…your first kiss?” said Harriet, because that was the onlything she could make sense of at the moment.

Petra threw up her hands. “Hey, excuse me that I’ve been toobusy fighting cr-, uh, ignorance about science and poor school funding! I’vegot a lot on my plate, and you would totally be the first one to know if I hada boyfriend. Or. You know. A girlfriend.”

“Right,” said Harriet, feeling dazed. “That all makes sense.”Sort of.

“Besides,” continued Petra, “it’s a fairy-tale-poetry-history-whatevercurse, and those things have all kindsof rules, and in the stories it’s always supposed to be someone you really love.And you’re my best friend and also, like super pretty, which the curse thing definitely mentioned, and there’s no oneI’d rather have give me a fairy-tale curse ending magical kiss than you. But ifyou don’t want to, I get it, I’ll find something else and-”

Petra squeaked as Harriet pulled her in for kiss, like she’dbeen dreaming of doing since they were like twelveand Harriet had first figured out how crushes worked. After an awkward momentof not quite fitting together Petra relaxed against Harriet and kissed herenthusiastically back.

“So,” Harriet asked, almost breathless when the kiss finallyended, “did that work?”

Petra pulled the collar of her shirt forward and looked down.“No more glowing, which is probably a good sign. But you know, just to be safeI should probably hang around for a while. Maybe try a few more times. Forscience!”

“Want to put on a terrible monster movie and make out?”asked Harriet.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO i have NOT read them, but they sound AMAZING (especially if there is HONOR) :DD

I side-eye anything these days that proclaims to be about the “darker tones” or whatever, but hey, at least there’s no way it can be worse than Lost In Austen. Right?

IT CAN’T POSSIBLY BE WORSE THAN LOST IN AUSTEN

The first thing Harry saw when he opened his eyes, still groggy from whatever had knocked him out, was Peter Parker, who immediately greeted Harry by saying, “Ok, so, the first thing I need you to know is that I am not a space pirate, no matter what Jameson says, and so I haven’t actually kidnapped you or anything-”

Harry groaned and put his head in his hands to try to steady it, with the added bonus that he didn’t have to look around at what was definitely his best friend’s pirate spaceship; “That is literally the least comforting thing you could have said oh my god.”

my all-time ultimate fave character:

I’m…not sure I have one? I like them all a lot?? (And there’s a not insignificant chance that the answer is Caius, which is an upsetting thought.)

a character I didn’t used to like but now do:

I hated Rook when he was first introduced so much that I almost stoppedreading the book.

a character I used to like but now don’t:

N/A everyone is good.

a character I’m indifferent about:

What was the name of the male student narrator in book 4? I genuinely can’teven remember right now.

a character who deserved better:

All the aviators who died, Balfour just, like, in general.

a ship I’ve never been able to get into:

Honestly all the canon ships are good.

a ship I’ve never been able to get over:

All of them, ugh. Hal/Roy, Rook/Thom, and Alcibiades/Caius are the ones I’mmost actively fannish about.

a cute, low-key ship:

Kouje/Mamoru is ridiculously sweet and I don’t talk about them enough.

an unpopular ship but I still enjoyed it:

I don’t think there’s enough of a fandom to call any ship “unpopular.”  Let’s say Rook/Thom.

a ship that was totally wrong and never should have happened:

Technically Rook/Thom is a correct answer here, but *shrug emoji*

my favourite storyline/moment:

I can’t pick a favorite book! They’re all so good!

But obviously my favorite moment is: “Learn some manners, you rude little fucker.” DRAGON FEELINGS.

a storyline that never should have been written:

Nope they’re all good. (I’m might rewrite Rook’s chapter 1 a bit if it were up to me though)

my first thoughts on the show book:

I legit picked up Havemercy because there was a character named Alcibiades.That was it. I didn’t even read the summary. I went in 100% blind. (I knew itwas fantasy and there was a dragon on the cover, so I guess that’s a tiny bitof info).

my thoughts now:

yesssss CUDDLES AND KISSES AND GROUCHINESS I love it

Neither Grantaire nor Courfeyrac is a morning person, though Courfeyrac is much better at pretending he is.