#oh school

i hate online discussions for class. i need to talk to people? and the teacher is going to be seeing? grading? our opinions?? How do i not sound like a pompous *fool?* i dont mean to sound that way... its just the way i type given the anxiety of the situation

the public school experience: studying haikus again

Life is just kinda awful sometimes. Specifically being forced into small rooms with gross high school boys. The same kids I’ve been ranted about for constantly making me feel uncomfortable was at it again today. Today he was “airing out his hands” ???? First off I don’t know what that means but I think that’s something you do if your hands are wet or cold both of which I don’t think applied. But the way he was doing it was by clapping his hands together in a way that I think??? Was supposed to sound like sex??? And it doesn’t help that he was moaning and throwing his head back while doing so. Anyways I was uncomfortable and I was called homophobic because he’s gay. And I said loudly, defensively that I’m not homophobic and the guy does a complete 180 and starts staring me down asking me to repeat myself. I again said that anything sex related makes me uncomfortable, I don’t care whether it be “straight” or “gay” but the guy was still made at me. But like seriously, if a guy is just walking down the street without a shirt on while I’m in the car I have to cover my eyes and look away. Anything intimate or private make a me uncomfortable especially sex so I’m getting really tired of this kid and I find this entire thing really upsetting. After explaining FOR WHO KNOWS HOW MANY TIMES that this stuff makes me uncomfortable the guy asks me “so you don’t want kids?” And I say no I don’t want kids. And I’m here thinking to myself I don’t want to have sex let alone kids and if anything I might adopt one day because I’m adopted and think it’s really awesome But before I can say anymore he says Awww but I think little yous running around would be cute, and the guy who called me homophobic starts laughing Because He was imagining someone “f***ing me in my scooter” and was cracking up I ran him over I’ve told this person at least 2 times that I’m ace but didn’t know what it meant and just write it off as well you haven’t had sex how do you know you don’t like it, and was just floored by the idea that I don’t find people “hot” and went on a tangent on how finely sculpted the actor of Thor is. He then started to question his own straighteness as he went on and on about how attractive Thor’s actor is. So after being embarrassed and enraged, AND running into/over this person I went and got a student laptop and googled the definition of sex repulsed asexual. I plopped the laptop in his hands and just rolled away to pack up my bag because it was almost time to go thank goodness. And could hear him say “that’s a thing? People feel that way?? Wow my mind is just expanding I had no idea about this stuff!” Granted he said it and seemed serious and stopped pestering me as much but it could have just been because he wanted to leave the class as well. But yeah I guess being made to feel very uncomfortable because a classmate who is gay is making sexual innuendos in front of adults and minors makes me homophobic. I shouldn't have to be forced to come out in an attempt to make boys who don't want to stop their innapropriate behaviors stop their innapropriate behaviors. Why doesn’t it matter that I feel like throwing up because of the way my classmates talk and act because they are guys and “guys just have sex on the brain 100% of the time so that makes it okay"

I scared a classmate today by doing a trump impression, they thought there was a male who snuck up by them and started talking.