#octomutation

Heyy besties. I added Muppet gifs because I'm classy like that and this is a big block of text. Here are the messages between cedar and I please read them because it’s important. Here is also another post that I think is important to read as well. Cedar shouldn’t have lashed out like that.

So. Some of y'all may know of the fic that I have written. And how Cedar is not happy about it. They have told their side of the story, and now it's time to tell mine. I would like to say that at the very beginning of all of this and I have ALWAYS had positive intentions and I always assume the best out of people and assume that they also have positive intentions. (Something I learned as a Camp Counsler. Conflict resolution besides my very complex lore as a T-Rex in a skin suit is just one of the many skills I have under my belt from my summers there ^^)

I was going to just let this go, but one of Cedar's "friends" just SEEKED me out on a server to harass me. And I think it's time that I tell my side of the story. I use Cedars name because they are well known in the fandom and I mean we all know who I'm talking about. This has continued and many people have cold blocked me and I’m deciding to back away and just have this post.

I truly hope that everyone actually READS my fic to form THEIR OWN opinions. At the end of the day, don't listen to me. Don't listen to Cedar. We're all sane enough to form our own opinions. I am human, I make mistakes. Cedar is human, they make mistakes.

I'm going to tell a full timeline of my side of the story. It's long so I apologize for that. But I am going to post this and hopefully, this can alleviate some of the drama because I just want to write. I believe in hearing both sides of the story, especially in these cases.

So, let's get to the very beginning.

My mom met my dad and on the first date he asked her to iron his shirt- Oh fuck too far back (he did actually do that and somehow they're still married)

Sorry, I giggle.

OK, cedar's morelikedoccock fan page was the very first introduction to Doc Ock tumblr that I had besides hey there I'm Ashley. (love your gifs btw they're iconic and just lovely). So yes, there may have been a parasocial relationship happening and you just... I mean your art is fantastic and it inspired me to write an entire fic inspired by your AU. But I will get to that later. So I know that you're human and that I'm human. I did look up to you. And I know that we are all "strangers" on this app. But I really don't see it that way, we've interacted many times and the same goes for other people that I have met online. I'm a friendly person, and I can be sensitive I admit that. But I think that I've behaved accordingly to all of this.

So my Tumblr has always been SUPER weird. Like asks didn't come in until like two months after, I couldn't dm, comment, reblog, like, or follow any people basically. And that happened with Cedar's profile. And I have back and forth of the both of us going "lol that's weird I didn't block you" and Cedar was actually the one who helped me get the bug fixed. That's why I went to Twitter because I couldn't dm them on Tumblr. Now my Tumblr is fixed and it's thanks to Cedar. So thank you for doing that ^^

I wrote this fic and published the four chapters (and I am not joking) when they posted the very first drawing of Mutated otto you know the one on the glass it's very hot. And I finished this fic LONG before they started their own fic. My doc was created on April 28th if that gives you reference. So all that I really had were the few drawings that they wrote. And I didn't want to rely too heavily on those because I had an original idea and I wanted to publish it. I was not plagiarizing, I was writing an original story inspired by your au.

As for the fic. I do admit that I did post like four chapters. Like I said the asks came through like two months after and I am working on my restraint and self-control and impulses took over. But as soon as I saw your post about not wanting that I immediately took it down and apologized in an ask. And you said "I'm not angry!" and I decided to not publish anymore and ask you if I could publish it after you finished your fic. And you agreed. So I decided to go back and rework it so that it would be good enough for you, I had friends beta read it and such and I was hoping to have Cedar beta read it and give me the thumbs up. But then Cedar blocked me on literally everything. I did seek them out on their art account because I have worked so hard on this fic and really wanted their blessing. But I've only gotten responses that don't want me to interact with them.

I believe that this has all been blown out of proportion and I wish that we could have discussed this together in private and found some sort of compromise or something. I just want to write my stories. And the discussion that we did have was not beneficial to either party. The way that I was treated wasn't ideal and I wish that I wasn't called childish. Because I'm not.

I do apologize for saying that comment was from you. If it wasn't, I'm sorry. The words used were just eerily similar to what you messaged me and when you replied fifteen minutes after I put two and two together. Emotions are high, and I apologize. And whoever did write that... wow. Just wow. Only I get to call myself a terrible writer smh.

Also, regarding my grammar. I'm an amateur writer. This is why I use Grammarly premium, use code Rexy-

Overall, please don't go after me or Cedar. I know that some of you will ignore this because people ignored Cedar's tag and went after me. I'm just tired.

But in the end, I truly believe that this is one of my best fics ever, and I needed to share this story to you all. I was aware of the reactions I may get, but in the end even after all the tears shed and everything that's happened. I don't regret it. Because this is a good story, and I believe that it should be shared.

Please, go read it and form your own opinion because I am NOT copying Cedar, I am NOT plagiarizing them and I am NOT a stalker or a bad person. I just want to write and unfortunately, this happened in the process.

I will continue to write this story. Please do not go after Cedar, I still love their art and I wish that I could see it. But I respect their wishes and I don't look at their account anymore. Any information has come from friends and I don't actively go "What are they saying about me?!"

Anyway, the fic is on my about the author page along with my other stories which I encourage you all to go read because I believe that I'm a good writer (even though you can see that my writing has improved in my latest fics haha) I hope that someday we can all look back at this and laugh. Because wow this has been a lot.

I am keeping my comments and dm's open because I believe in having a conversation about these kinds of conflicts and resolving them together. And by having comments and dms open there is no need for anyone to have to go to my twitter or discord. I’m posting this, and then I’m not doing anything else.