#obgfave

Does anyone remember when this guy messaged me a month or so ago and I said I hoped I had peaked for awkwardness, but I would probably top it? I’m pleased to announce that I’ve topped it.

Link to post I’m talking about

I'm not even smiling in any of my profile pics.

Hopefully the last update ever (knocking on wood) on stalker dude. It’s been a little over two months since I sent this last email, so I’m hoping he’s done and moved on.

tl;dr for those who don’t want to read back through the whole story in that link: I briefly dated this guy last summer, broke it off in August, and he was still occasionally annoying me in April of this year. 

After he claimed he deleted my “leave me alone” email without reading it (and thus had no idea what it said, which I don’t believe for a second), I started taking this more seriously. If he’ll ignore a direct request to cease contact, and try to find ways to weasel around that, then what’s to stop him from just stalking me indefinitely, or escalating his behavior? 

After talking to my friends and a lawyer (whose assistant was very helpful and empathetic, as she had recently had to get a restraining order against some dude herself), I sent a certified cease-and-desist letter. I figured that since I couldn’t prove he read my email, I needed to have some kind of proof that he knew I wanted him to leave me alone, and refused to do so. If he accepted it, I’d have the return receipt. If he refused it, I could say he’s intentionally ignoring my wishes to leave me alone, since there’s nothing else I would send him in a certified letter. 

So of course he not only refused to receive the letter, but he also sent me the email posted above (first email). After that nonsense, I talked to a detective with the local police (who was very helpful and empathetic, as she had also had to get a restraining order against some dude recently - wtf is up with these dudes?), and then the assistant Commonwealth’s attorney, who would be the prosecutor if I brought charges against him. The CA said that with his email saying he was refusing to sign for the letter, I certainly had proof that he was ignoring my requests to leave me alone, but he was concerned that a judge would determine there was not a direct threat to me, and that stalker dude may not view his own behavior as threatening. He said that to ensure it would be an open-and-shut case to get a restraining order against him, I needed to send one last email and make it clear that I view any continuing contact of any kind as a threat, even if he doesn’t view it that way. So I did, and I included a copy of the certified letter that his dumbass wouldn’t sign for. It’s been over two months since I sent it, so I’m hopeful in saying that hopefully this is the end of this crap. 

For the record, I have no idea what he’s talking about with seeing me the previous Saturday and being uncomfortable. I didn’t notice him at any of the three public places I went that day, but two of them were crowded enough that he could’ve been there and I could’ve missed him. He didn’t say where he supposedly saw me, and a friend pointed out that he could be bluffing for some reason. Dunno why he would do that, but he’s not the most logical person around, so I’m not ruling it out. I also don’t know or care who Kristina is, but if she’s a real person and not an idea invented to try to make me jealous or something then I wish her luck with this absolute loon. BTW, bonus points for him having the gall to think he’s a “really nice guy” and putting a question mark at the end of “goodbye,” as though that whiny email might make me change my mind and want further communication from him.

Why didn’t I reply before? Because fuck the Man, that’s why.