#nshansol

ask memes I : headcanons.🔥 — what’s your greatest fear?

Loss is something Minjae never had to deal with. He never lost a family member close enough to him to cause any suffering, and that is something that scares him a lot. What’s he gonna do if something happens to his parents? What’s he gonna do if something happens to his dogs, or to his cousins? What is he gonna do if someday something happens to his best friend? Or to a future romantic interest? He has no idea of how he’s going to deal with those things. Of course, he has some idea from what he’s seen from others and what he’s studied in college, but it’s never the same for everyone. There isn’t a rule to how you should feel or how you should react, and that is something Minjae has no control of. It scares the shit out of him.

↪ on the line... @nshansol

It was different now, navigating her own busy schedule after Lee Kiyoung’s speech. The guy really knew how to cause a cloak of paranoia to descend upon an entire agency of government operatives, she’d give him that much--- the speech had done nothing less than imply that every active agent was to be treated as a suspect as administration cracked down on Park Jaekwang’s case. And with that came the paranoia. Noticing suspicious things about coworkers you would’ve never given thought to. Overthinking every conversation, every brush of an elbow in the hallway. Of course it didn’t help, in Haewon’s case, that her anxiety disorder would blow everything out of proportion anyway, but she was keeping up on her medication to hopefully reduce those effects. She had to be logical about this, no jumping to conclusions--- she could only hope that administration would extend the same courtesy.

Which was why she felt a bit of a knot in her chest now, taking the familiar route to the data center, all of her helpful notes tucked into the stack of files she held by her side. Haewon had come to know most of her coworkers that she interacted with on the daily, trusted them. And she knew Lee Hansol--- had known him for quite a while, actually. But that didn’t mean that she knew him well. Hansol was much like herself, she’d observed--- didn’t talk about himself much, not enough to get a grip on his values or alignments. Though while Haewon herself at least pretended to be open, tried to make friends despite keeping most of her past experiences to herself, Hansol didn’t care much to be outwardly friendly. And that made Haewon nervous.

@nshansol

It feels like fate when Minjae decides for once to leave his office and walk to the building’s cafeteria. But he actually has a good excuse for that: forgot his lunch at home, on the dinner table. How careless is that? But he’s not as upset and angry about it when he walks into the cafeteria and sees him.

Sitting by himself at an isolated table, far in the back of the little cafe, with what looks like a cup of coffee is Lee Hansol, the one person that has been confusing Minjae the most for the past few months. Not only because he comes into therapy to talk about what’s he’s done in the last week and nothing about how he feels, or about something in specific like most of his patients. 

But Minjae doesn’t mind it.

He has grown fond of the other male. He enjoys listening to him talk every week, his voice feels soothing for Minjae and the one hour of their therapy session doesn’t feel enough for him to be satisfied with Hansol’s company. He could be there for hours, listening.

And it feels like fate, to find Hansol at the cafeteria on the one day he has to go and buy himself a cup of tea and maybe a slice of cake. He buys his tea and his cake and then smiles softly, takes a long deep breath and walks towards the table at the far end of the place, he feels more and more nervous at each step he takes.