#notzilon

big punch man

Send me an anonymous ask completing the sentence “I wish you would write a fic where…”

“What about Bonescorcher?” Owain suggests. 

His father’s pallid face is hard to make out through the usual storm of black feathers, but from fleeting glimpses it’s possible to piece together a look of confusion. The “huh?” is barely audible over the flapping of unwashed wings. Owain doesn’t mind. In some ways the flock is like family, just as surreal to see alive as his own parents. Though his parents don’t always subsist on slain corpses. 

“For your weapon,” he explains, extending his arm as an old friend comes to roost. “Mother told me you haven’t affixed your tome with any sort of impressive title — appalling, by the way — and there’s no one in all the lands better suited to rectify this mistake than I!” The crow perched on Owain’s hand ruffles its feathers distastefully as he strikes a dramatically appropriate pose. Someday, when he had the time, Owain resolved to ask Laurent how such a small-brained creature had managed to develop scorn.

There’s a pause Owain takes as the hallmark of a man lost in thought. Or daydreams. He could never tell which. Then Henry shakes his head and the flock moves en masse, a vast halo expanding and contracting in reaction to sudden movement. 

“Hmmm, nah. Doesn’t suit me.”

Owain sighs, dislodging his unhappy companion as he puts his hands on his hips. “I’ve been mulling that one over all day, and you go and discard my magnum opus just like that? Aren’t parents meant to support their children’s endeavors? ...And it was a good name, really.”

Henry’s laugh pierces his shroud, and Owain hears a piece of himself in his father’s voice. “No, no, it was great!” Henry assures him, enthusiasm genuine in the way of one pleased not to lie. “But it’s not right for me. See, I don’t do much bone scorching! Just plain ol’ death by dark magic. “

“Oh.” Owain’s shoulders slump. And just as quickly, he perks back up. “If it’s a more black-magicky title you’re after — what about Deathstriker?”

The smiles that Henry wears are rarely false, but they don’t often hold such pride. “Hey, that’s perfect! I should let you name all my tomes.”

Owain gapes. “You have more? And you haven’t named any of them?”

JP Henry also doesn’t make jokes/puns/etc and is infantilized, being written as an adult that specifically acts as a child. It doesn’t make sense to cherrypick from certain translations - the EN version is written as Henry being legitimate and Olivia overthinking what’s going on with him. Saying that Olivia was right in the JP version ignores EVERYTHING that was changed about Henry, which is what makes Henry so incredibly lovable+memorable.

lowkey otp: chrom/gaius

highkey notp: henry/olivia

[softly] don’t notp: lon’qu/lissa

highkey otp but i’m scared of saying it because it’s not a very popular choice: henry/libra, lon’qu/basilio 

what if I did a parody of the My Two Dads opening w/ this