#notstable

The house is still wobbling even after throwing a second job into the mix.

Sometimes I only worked 4 hours a week and other times I worked 35 hours a week at this job. During the slow season, I would go weeks without a single shift. I never had a consistent paycheck or consistent work week. This was by choice and by chance. 

I would do my best to still attend all of my committee meetings, program days, outreach programs, travel, network, volunteer, run the businesses and do all of the behind the scenes work that came along with it.

Since my pay was inconsistent, I would make moves in a forward direction and then take a step or two back when the money dried up. The money was great and helped.

The tough part was more on the lines of planning time. During the first busy season, I primarily worked early and mid-morning shifts. This was what worked best but was not the healthiest of decisions. 

Before working as a server I typically woke up between 6 and 8 AM each day and went to sleep sometime between 11 PM and 2 AM depending on what work I needed to accomplish for the next day. Occasionally I would pull all nighters to finish up work and prep for something important the follow day but they were not too regular.

Once I started as a server I got little sleep. My work load had not decreased. I was still pushing to do it all. A few of my shifts were in the early morning starting at 4 AM, 5 AM or 6 AM. It was difficult to sleep with so much bouncing around in my mind. If I did not complete the tasks I needed to, I would lay in bed looking at the ceiling and struggle to get sleep. On the nights I worked until I finished what was needed for the next day, I might only get 2 or 3 hours of sleep before working at the conference center.

After 6 days averaging less than 4 hours of sleep a night, I would become very mentally slow, physically weak, emotionally out of control, I was falling asleep at the wheel, falling asleep during meetings,  and even at times fell asleep while stretching with students at the beginning of their class.

All nighters started to become a more regular occurrence partly because I was worried I would not wake up for work and partly because I was trying to accomplish too much.