#notreddit

Context: Basically some idiot posted in a bisexual oriented community asking for advice on how to find partners that fit their preference. They did so, however, by outright saying that they wanted to find "real" bisexuals, and obviously implied that those outside of the OP's preferences are not "real" bisexuals. Especially because these preferences didn't even have much to do with gender but just certain preferences in bed, it was a completely unnecessary attack in a community defined by its general open-mindedness and broad scope. 

I'm not going to cherry pick my words here - you can read for yourself exactly what I said: 

No, what's unacceptable is asserting that your preferences are more "real" than other people. If someone identifies as bi, then they are bi. They may not be the type of person you want to have a relationship with, but that doesn't mean they are less "real" or less bi. The reason you're getting hostility here is because you aren't just asking how to find people that fit your needs or preferences - you're outright implying that those who don't fit your personal needs or preferences don't belong in this community. Seeing as the bi community is, by definition, one of the broader and more open-minded ones, that doesn't usually come across well. Please feel free to restate your question in a more value-neutral manner, but this really isn't the place to pass a judgement on people because they don't fit your preferences.

OP then responds back extremely defensively, accusing me of being disrespectful. So anyway, that's the context.

First of all, did you read that comment? In what way was I being disrespectful. Actually, I was explaining a concept that you apparently repeatedly fail to grasp, as you continue to use alienating language that implies a degree of "real" or "feigned" bisexuality based on your personal preferences. It's clear that this commenter's reading comprehension is severely lacking if they consider it more problematic to politely inform someone of their errors and encourage them to rephrase their needs in a value-neutral manner, than to actively alienate and insult portions of the community to which you are speaking. (And yes, let me reiterate that - this person is speaking to the community that they are explicitly shaming, not even talking about the community in another tangential context.)

But you know what? That's cool. It's actually true that policing other people identities is the very mechanism that defines heterosexuality, biphobia, and actually basically every form of oppression in the history of humanity. Your very words are actually the model of oppression, and your continued defense of those words is a clear indicator of your stance toward bolstering inequality and hatred, and away from a world where people's lives and actions aren't held to the scrutiny of some random other person's peculiar biases.