My Rant On Disney’s “Descendants”:
Well, another sequel is upon us and, having seen the Bobsheaux and Musical Hell reviews, I don't know why they keep happening. Everyone's entitled to like and dislike stuff, but, in my opinion, the "Descendants" movies suck and should not have gotten even one sequel. The sad part is, the "Descendants" movies could've worked if it made sense and did so many more things...
These "suggestions" are mostly gripes but still...
-Either have it in 2D to keep with the original Disney spirit or get better costumes that don't look like they came from a cheap knock-off of Party City.-Pick a time setting and stick to it. Look, I like anachronisms (70's "Jesus Christ Superstar) but all the "hip with the kids" stuff get annoying. Not to mention, a good chunk of these villains DIED in the films they were in. At least explain how they ressurected. Plus, how is Cruella (a person from the 50's-60's) in the same time zone as the Medieval Queen from "Snow White"?
-Have Minnie and Mickey be the emperors. They are Disney's power couple and mascots. What made Belle and Adam so special that they ruled over the other royal couples? Besides, with the mice ruling, it could lead to the films being spin-offs of "House of Mouse".
-Melody, Zephyr, Jane, Daniel, Kiara...WHERE ARE THEY?! They were actual "Descendants" of Disney characters yet the films act like they don't exist. And then there's Gothel's daughter, Cassandra (who I am POSITIVE is Frollo's kid. Her and maybe Gaston if time periods right...).
-If you want a star-crossed story of villain's and heroes' kids falling in love then have it be believable and...honest (no drugged cookies or spells). If Kovu and Kiara can do it, why can't this?-No butchering "Be Our Guest"!!
-Not have the heroes' kids be brats. Look, no parent is perfect, but I doubt Cinderella and Aurora would have raised pompous idiots.
-Speaking of which, didn't "Cinderella III" have an easter-egg that implied Aurora and Phillip were Charming's ancestors?
-Meanwhile, Mulan, having faced a lot on both gender roles, wouldn't mind what her kid would chose as long as they'd be happy.
-Who married Smee and Dopey?? What's the story on that? And while we're on the subject who are the villian kids' other parents. We know Mal's dad is Hades (alas, I must shed a tear for Persephone...), but what about the other three? Did it include Cruella's husband from the original "101 Dalmatians" book?
-Ok, I was going to say that Jafar should've been Mal's dad thanks to "House of Mouse" having them date, but, while I was looking for the clip on YouTube, it turns out the show also had Maleficent and Hades flirting with each other...that explains it...Again I must shed a tear for Persephone...That being said, Jafar could, at least, be the father of the Evil Queen's daughter...
