#noaf

When I was finished and ready for bed I reluctantly returned to my room.

Mariam was either asleep or pretending to be. Both fine with me. I was not in the mood to talk it out anyway. Honestly I doubted that we could still talk it out at this point.

I had never felt so distant with her after a fight. This was different.

I grabbed my phone from the nightstand and opened my chat with Layan.

(f/n): Hey <3 So … Mariam and my dad already know. Sorry, it just happened.

I had to be aware of my phrasing in case her brothers would look through Layan's phone.

Layan: How did they take it?

(f/n): My dad took it well. Mariam not at all. We r not talking rn.

Layan: Sorry. Maybe I should have held back more with the teasing.

(f/n): No, it's not ur fault. Seeing u tomorrow is the only reason I'm not dreading my birthday tbh as I don't have any other friends.

Layan and I were calling us friends in our chat from time to time to be on the safe side. But we knew to read it differently.

Layan: Someday it will all be easier. We just have to hold out a little longer.

(f/n): I hope u r right. Anyway … heading to bed now. C u tomorrow <3

Layan: <3

Putting my phone away felt like being all alone again.

My eyes moved over to Mariam who did not even stir. A few years ago we had come along pretty well. I wished it had not changed.

The situation with Layan's family was bad enough. It did not help that my own twin was turning against us as well. No matter how much I tried to persuade myself that Mariam's behavior did not change anything about my feelings for Layan it still hurt.

I fell asleep wallowing in memories of Mariam and me being best friends instead of enemies.

The next morning we were woken up by our parents and brother singing a birthday song for us.

Our parents were each holding a cupcake with a candle on it, mom going over to Mariam and dad to me.

After blowing out the candle they cheered for us and then congratulated us.

They had even prepared a luxurious breakfast for us.

It all worked out without Mariam and me having to interact.

On the bus ride Layan congratulated me with a quick, tight hug and handed me a little box with a beautiful necklace in it.

Of course I was wearing it from that moment on.

The rest of the school day was the same as usual.

Some people actually came up to congratulate me.

I concentrated on school work to prevent myself from thinking about the situation with Mariam who was ignoring or at least not paying attention to me.

Was she mad at me after what I had said or was she feeling guilty? Either way it hurt. Our birthday had always been a bonding time.

She seemed to have a good time with Noaf and Dina, as usually.

At the end of the day Noaf, Dina and Layan were coming with Mariam and me immediately.

As soon as we had entered the house I vanished with Layan into my room. Mariam could have the living room for all I cared. I was pretty sure that she would not come up here with Layan present.

In my room I did not hesitate to kiss Layan earning a smile from her before she kissed me back.

We ended up cuddling on my bed.

“So when are you planning to tell the rest of your family?”, Layan wondered.

“Sometime around dinner, I think”, I considered.

“Mariam and you are still not talking”, she noted.

“No … and I don't think that will change anytime soon. I'm not planning to take the first step again. Everything I said to her is true”, I proposed.

“I get that. I hope she will take the first step though. No matter how much I can't stand her I know that she's important to you”, Layan stated.

During dinner it was mainly Mariam and Dina talking until my parents interjected and started talking to Layan.

Layan was pretty good with them which did not surprise me. She could be great with words after all and knew how to present herself best.

After dinner Mariam and I got our gifts.

I actually got the headphones I had wished for and was super happy about it.

“What about your necklace? Did you get it today?”, mom inquired.

Automatically my hand wandered to it to hold it. “Oh, yeah. Layan got it for me. It's pretty, isn't it?”

I flashed Layan a loving smile and rested my head on her shoulder without even thinking about it.

Mariam was glaring at the sight, but nobody else appeared to notice.

Dina and Noaf seemed to be surprised how close Layan and I actually were, although I was sure that Mariam had complained to them about it before.

It was all silent right now. It was now or never.

“Um … by the way … I still need to tell you something”, I began and sat upright again.

Layan was holding my hand under the table.

“What is it, sweetheart?”, mom questioned.

“Layan isn't just my friend … she's my girlfriend”, I confessed.

Dad smiled proudly at me.

“Okay ...”, mom uttered surprised.

Dina and Noaf were looking shocked as well. So at least Mariam had kept it secret.

“But don't make out anywhere I can see you”, my brother joked making dad and me laugh.

“Okay”, I ensured him.

“Layan, you are welcome to come over whenever you want of course. But (f/n) you know the boundaries”, mom reminded me.

“Yeah, don't worry about it”, I reassured her.

“Fine then”, she said before cleaning the dishes with dad.

“Your parents are really laid-back. Could only dream of it”, Layan pointed out.

“Yeah, guess I'm lucky in that regard”, I agreed.

I just wished my home could be a safe place. But as long as Mariam was so stubborn that was a wish that could not come true.