#nice save tim

BE SERIOUS! THIS IS YOUR MAN.

[Masterlist]

Prompt from @stealingyourbones found here

"Valerie in Metropolis chews out Superboy for using her car as a projectile to hit a villain."

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Valerie wasn't aware that part of being a hero meant using the possessions of those you were protecting to fight the beings you were protecting them from. In fact, she's pretty sure it wasn't. Sure, she's not always been on the right side of the fight, herself, but she's gotten better! And besides, unlike someone she could name, she's never used a stranger's car as a weapon before!

"OI! You jerk! Did you have to throw my car?! Don't you have freaking laser vision, you idiot!?" Val yelled at Superboy Sr, who was levitating just above the intersection a few feet away from her.

Superboy glared incredulously at her over his shoulder, which, first of all, rude, she should be glaring at him, not the other way around. Second of all, she has every right to be upset about this, how he can be incredulously doing anything in response to that fact is, quite frankly, stupid.

"You call that a car? Honey, fuzzy dice are so 50s, and what was with the white wall tires? I was doing that dated hunk of junk a favor." Oh. Oh he did not. He. Did. Not.

"That 'dated hunk of junk', as you called it, was my grandfather's. It was a feta HEIRLOOM, you—you cheese curd! You leftover piece of string cheese! If you think you're gonna get out of this scott free, then buddy, you've got another thing coming! It may have been on its last legs, but that thing was, quite literally, my only reliable mode of transportation in this gouda forsaken place. 'Moby Dick'! Do you just casually destroy private property every time you fight some ne'er-do-well? How the 'Flygirl' you manage to get away with frequent property damage I'll never know, but—" who knew cussing out a superhero in the middle of battle was so hard to do? She had to up her cardio next time to went to the gym, this was unacceptable.

Superboy glanced at her again and rolled his eyes, dodging out of the way of a different thrown car before replying. "Look, as much as I'd love to hear you go on, I'm kind of busy at the moment, can we talk about this later? If you're really that torn up over the antique rust bucket, I'll make it up to you. Alright?"

Val narrowed her eyes at him as she ducked under a chunk of flying rubble. "You better. In fact, to make sure you don't get to get out of this, I'm going to stay right on your tail the rest of this fight. You try to lose me, I take you to court. Now will you stop dancing around this quack?! Just finish him already!"

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Incoming message

From: The Konman

Hey, question. Could you, theoretically, lend me some money for a car?

From: Third Tim's the Charm

... is this about that chick whose car you threw instead of using your heat vision earlier?

From: The Konman

Oh no, I am not losing that bet, I can totally go a full week without melting things with my eyes.

From: Third Tim's the Charm

... I'll see what I can do.

From: The Konman

You're the best ^⁠_⁠^

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Credit: "The Konman" is from the amazing chat fic "Crime, Love, and Ghosts. (And other, Probably)" by Thornrose270 on AO3, I highly recommend reading it ^⁠_⁠^

There's no specific make or model mentioned because, while I am an appreciator of cars, I do not want to make any more waves in the car enthusiast community than I might have already, what with my comments on fuzzy dice and white wall tires (⁠;⁠ŏ⁠﹏⁠ŏ⁠)

Also, on Val's use of cheese and literature as stand-in cuss words. Kids emulate the language used around them as they grow up ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠⊙⁠_⁠ʖ⁠⊙⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ also, I really wanted to use some cheese related cuss words (⁠^⁠～⁠^⁠;⁠)

Tim: you gawt a herrrrrcut?

Me: WHY IS EVERYONE TELLING ME THAT? AHA NO I DIDN'T.

Tim: err hair makeover?

Me: lool nah... why?

Tim: looks better imo

Me: ano?

Tim: looks better in my opinion

Me: OH, thanks xD... WAIT, what's that suppose to mean?

Tim: it... improved? lool