#neoholiday

“Your brother is bringing his new girlfriend this year, too. They seem very happy together,” the shift in topic breaks through your fog of swirling regrets and you blink to attention, dreading the trajectory your mom is now heading down. 

“That’s good for him, Mom, I’m excited to meet her.” you sigh, silently pleading for her to drop the topic for once.

“It’s too bad you don’t have a boyfriend you could bring, _____.” 

“Mom,” you warn, trying to cut her off before she can begin the same familiar tirade about your love life.

“I just want you to be happy, honey,” she starts and you think that might be the end of the topic for once before a burst of inspiration flows into her voice, “but you know, we’re having a hall party this year and that boy you dated in high school will be there, what was his name again?” 

“Mark,” you supply the name, inwardly groaning. You nod along as she plans out the big reunion with your first boyfriend. Someone that you know full well has a girlfriend and absolutely no interest in rekindling anything with you even if you were interested. 

“Mom,” you break through her monologue, “I’m fine, really. I’m happy. I’ll call you before I leave tomorrow, okay?” You say your goodbyes and end the call, flopping back onto your bed with a sigh before picking the phone back up and scrolling through your contacts. 

Yuta, please kill me

No can do, ______. Why so dramatic? 

Christmas

Mom grilling you again? 

Over. A. Fire. 

Want some moral support? Wine?

Yes pls. Both.

Be right there

Tossing the phone back onto your comforter, you set to work throwing some items into your suitcase. A few shirts, pyjama pants, jeans, and undergarments all tossed haphazardly into the awaiting vessel--a visual representation of your life staring up at you mockingly in a mess of fabric. A knock sounds at your door and you abandon your efforts, letting Yuta into your apartment and accepting the outstretched bottle of wine in his hands with a grateful smile. 

Your friendship had started in your Earth Sciences course at university when you ended up as lab partners--both equally as clueless about the properties of rock and stone. But you managed to squeak by without too much damage to the samples, and had forged an unexpected bond in the meantime. Everything about Yuta just fit. His optimism and love for life and people balanced your nervous disposition well. You went to the same concerts, shared the same taste in books, and had the same favourite wine. Everything about it just felt right. 

In the beginning, your other friends had been convinced that you would start dating. If you were being entirely honest, a part of you had hoped for that as well. A part of you that watched him through a haze of wine and marvelled at the sparkling depths of his brown eyes, or the slight upturn of his lips. A bigger part of you, however, was afraid. Afraid of losing a friendship that felt so integral and comfortable. So you settled on friends and chose to ignore the way your heart would occasionally race when he brushed up against your arm, or pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. 

“So, what was the lecture today? Career? Money? Love?” Yuta asks, pouring a healthy amount of wine into your glass before filling his own. 

“My brother, apparently, has a girlfriend he is bringing to Christmas,” you sigh. “So selfish of him, he should have stayed single so the heat would be split between both of us, but now she’s trying to set me up with people from high school.” 

Yuta nods in contemplation, glancing at you over the rim of his wine glass. “Just lie,” he shrugs, “tell her you’re seeing someone.” 

“You don’t know my Mom,” the wine hits your taste buds in a wash of relief--bitter tannins matching your bitter mood. “She’s like a bloodhound, she’ll sniff out my singlehood in a second. What are your plans for Christmas?” 

“Nothing,” he shakes his head, “my family decided to go on holiday over the break and I didn’t feel like paying for the flight or resort.” 

“So you’re spending it alone?” You ask, thoughts of your own misery abandoned for a moment. 

“Yeah,” he shrugs, swirling the burgundy liquid around in his glass. “I’ll probably just stay at home.” 

“Yuta, that’s so sad.” You're not sure if it’s the wine getting to your head, or the thought of your best friend spending this holiday alone, but you feel your throat tighten. Taking another sip of wine, you try to wash down the swelling emotion. 

“I’ll be fine, _____,” he laughs, patting your hand in reassurance, “you worry about me too much.” 

“Someone needs to.” 

“If it makes you that upset,” he leans forward, eyes glinting with a familiar sheen of mischief, “then I have a proposition for you.” 

His face sits inches from yours, you feel the warmth of his breath across your face--watch as the glimmer in his eyes dances and shines in the lights of your apartment. A thread of worry builds up in your heart, “what?” 

“Take me home with you for Christmas,” he grins, and you feel your heart stop in your chest. “I won’t have to spend Christmas alone and you’ll get a pseudo-boyfriend for the holidays so you don’t have to listen to your mom nag.”

This was a bad idea. Every fibre in your being hums in fear at the thought. The feelings so carefully buried under years of platonic friendship rear their head like a dragon awakening from slumber. Fake dating? Too cliche, like something out of a Hallmark holiday movie. The girl in love with her best friend, they put up a good front for a while before they realize their feelings for each other and share a kiss on Christmas day under the falling snow. 

Except this wasn’t a movie, and you knew that kiss was not going to happen. That the only way this could possibly end was in heartbreak. 

You open your mouth, the rejection forming on your tongue, but stop short and watch as Yuta pulls back away from you. The cold air replacing the previous warmth from the proximity of his face. He sits, holding his wine glass aloft, wide smile still playing triumphantly across his face and you sigh, “okay.” 

“Really?” He laughs. Despite his pleasure at the idea, he had evidently not expected you to agree to it. 

“Yes, really,” you sigh, ignoring the chorus of screaming in your head. “Let’s do it. But,” he quirks an eyebrow as you point an accusing finger in his direction, “this is just so you don’t have to be alone on Christmas and I get a peaceful holiday for once.” 

Yuta nods gravely, holding a hand to his heart, “All for show,” he says, “I promise I won’t make you fall in love with me.” He finishes with a wink, downing the last of his wine. 

Too late, you think, reaching for the bottle to refill your own glass. 

--

The car slides to a stop in the snow covered driveway of your childhood home and you turn the engine off. Yuta reaches for the door handle but you stop him with a hand on his arm before he’s able to get out. “Yuta,” you shake off the edge in your voice, built up from spending the entire drive chasing your worried thoughts around in circles in your head. 

He takes your hand in his with a gentle squeeze and a soft smile before you’re able to finish the thought, “don’t worry, _____.” The warmth of his hand sinks into your heart, soothing the anxious knots in your chest like a balm. “I’ll be the perfect boyfriend,” he says with a wink before opening the door and collecting the bags from the trunk. 

“That’s what I’m worried about,” you sigh after him, stepping gingerly onto the ice-coated driveway. 

The front door opens wide with a gleeful cheer from your mom. “You made it!” She pulls you into a suffocating hug before reaching over and wrapping Yuta in a similar vice grip. “Oh, I’m so happy, ______. I don’t know why you didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend sooner, you know I can keep a secret I was just telling Aunt Martha the other day--” she continues the story, entirely disproving her point, as she ushers you into the house. 

You glance worriedly towards Yuta who simply smiles and follows your mom inside, leaving you in the wake of the greeting clutching your suitcase in hand. The weight of your decision sinks like a stone in your chest as you follow behind and listen as your mom chats happily with Yuta. The dread consumes your mind as you watch him listen in rapt attention, nodding along as she gives him a guided tour of the home, pointing to the gallery of old family photos lining the walls. 

She leads him upstairs and you follow behind. "And this was the year when _____ decided she wanted to be a witch, she wouldn't take the hat off no matter what--" 

"Mom," you warn, herding her up the rest of the stairs. 

"Oh, no need to be embarrassed, honey, it was so cute." She pats your cheek with a dismissive hand before turning her attention back to Yuta, “we had to see the principal because of it three different times.” 

"Yeah, ____, it’s cute." Yuta nudges your side with a wink, eliciting a groan of protest from you. "Besides, I was convinced I was a dinosaur when I was four."

Your mom laughs as if it's the best joke she's heard and you feel your heart constrict even tighter. The thread of your hopeless infatuation pulling taut as you catch the glimmer of mischief twinkling in Yuta's deep brown eyes. He wraps his arm around your waist and tugs you into his side--the stone sinks further into the pit of your stomach. 

"Okay, it’s so lovely to meet you, Yuta." your mom chirps, grinning at you as you stand in Yuta's embrace, "I'll leave you two lovebirds to get settled. Come down for a drink and snack whenever you're ready."

"Thanks, Mrs. _____, it’s lovely to finally meet you as well." Yuta loosens his grip around your waist, flashing a smile as he grabs the bags and hauls them into your room. 

It's been years since you last lived at home, but by the state of your bedroom it looks as though you had never left. Band posters and magazine cutouts line the walls next to old polaroids and photos of friends. Yuta sets the luggage down and leans over to examine some of the photos on the wall, a small smile tugging up the corners of his lips. 

"You never told me you played basketball," he laughs, looking at you with incredulity. For years now he’s been trying to get you to join him in some amateur sports league or another, but you maintain a staunch resistance. 

"Just for a year," you nod, sitting on the edge of your bed. "I was terrible." 

You watch as he moves around your room, eyes scanning over your entire childhood and adolescence laid bare before him. A feeling of nervousness creeps up your spine as you sit in the silence of your room--a vulnerability you haven't felt in his presence since your almost drunken confession at a party three years earlier. He smiles at a photo of you from your last year of high school before coming to sit next to you on the bed. You shift your eyes to your hands, examining the chipped nail polish adorning your fingers--unable to bring yourself to make eye contact with him. 

"Yuta," you breathe, twisting your fingers around each other. He brings a hand over yours as if to still them, thumb soothing out the nerves wound tight in your grip. "Was this a good idea?" 

"Probably not," he laughs softly, and you can't help but snort at the honesty. "If you want to stage a dramatic breakup later, we can do that." The thought sends an even stronger wave of panic coursing through your body. Even if it were just acting, you think it would likely break your heart regardless. 

"No, we're here now and I'm pretty sure my mom is in love with you already," you rub your palms flat against the thighs of your jeans--shaking off his hand in the process. "We should at least eat dinner."

"Good call.” He nods, hand flexing against his thigh. You stand and lean over to unpack your toiletries from the suitcase--missing the way his eyes linger on your back as you move from his side. 

--

A flurry of noise and movement downstairs pulls you and Yuta back down into the fray. You brace yourself for the incoming parade of questions and well-wishes aimed towards your facade of a relationship. Anxieties flare and you try to warn Yuta, to force him to sit down and concoct a backstory with you, but he simply smiles and tells you not to worry. That you’ve known each other long enough, you can just wing it. 

With a deep breath you descend the staircase and walk into the open arms of your family. Uncles, aunts, and brother crowd around and tug Yuta into their orbit. He falls in line seamlessly, as if these are he has known them all his life. As if he belongs here, amongst this chaos and chatter. His smile and laughter soothes your worries even as it winds the thread around your heart even tighter. 

Within minutes the meal is set out on the massive dining table and the real test begins. 

You watch and listen over a plate piled high with turkey, gravy, and vegetables as your brother and his new girlfriend regail the table with the tale of their meeting. A meet-cute in a coffee shop worthy of any romantic comedy--discovering their shared interest both in Stephen King and Americanos with far too many pumps of hazelnut syrup for anyone's good. 

They smile at each other in a mixture of embarrassment and love and you feel the bile rising in your throat knowing the questioning would inevitably turn in your direction. You pray the years of friendship will make the affection at least half as believable as the love in their eyes. At least, that it will be enough for Yuta to pretend--you know that love already exists in your own. 

"So, Yuta, how did you meet our lovely _____?" Heads turn in your direction and you reach your hand out wildly under the table--seeking out Yuta's own hand to quell your bubbling nerves. You sit frozen, feeling as though you’re about to take a test you never studied for. 

"Ah, she had the unfortunate luck of being partnered with me for our only science lab in university."

"Oh?" Shock reverberates around the table at the answer, your mom's eyes are wide with curiosity. "You've known each other for quite a long time then."

Yuta nods and you squeeze his hand, silently begging him to direct the topic of conversation elsewhere until you're able to find your voice. 

"Was this the Earth Sciences lab, _____?" Your brother asks, removing his attention from the forkful of mashed potatoes in his hand and glancing across the table towards you. 

"Yes," you reply, hesitant,unsure of why that detail might matter. 

"I remember you telling me how absolutely in love with your lab partner you were, glad to see you acted on it for once."

The memory hits you in a wave of pure horror. The first and only time you had ever told your brother about a crush. A foolish decision to trust him with something so delicate one time years ago--finally the consequences of that decision are rearing their ugly head. Your grip on Yuta's hand tightens as you scramble for a response. 

You could deny it. Say that your brother must be mistaken in his recollection, but that might only fuel to fire. Another round of teasing and ribbing from your all too eager uncles. 

You feel Yuta tense beside you, a subtle flexing of his muscles and you chance a glance in his direction. His expression is relaxed, casual. You wrench your eyes away from his and direct your gaze back towards your plate. His grip on your hand tightens, almost imperceptibly, as if he’s giving you permission to confess. To speak the words that have held their home so long in your throat without any release. 

You swallow the lump in your throat and prepare. Prepare for the end of a friendship as you once knew it. "Yeah," you laugh nervously, hoping your expression doesn't betray the fluster of emotions and thoughts swirling through your head. "I guess I finally did."

You retract your hand from Yuta's grip and dig back into your meal in an attempt to both calm the shaking and escape the familiar warmth of his touch. The conversation drifts from you, towards your uncle’s new business ventures, and you breathe a sigh of relief. Grateful that for once your family has taken the hint to drop a topic instead of sinking their teeth into it like ravenous wolves on a carcass. 

The evening passes as you walk the delicate line of trying to avoid Yuta's gaze as much as possible while also not drawing suspicion from your family. Thankfully, your mom mostly monopolizes his time by flipping through old family albums and making him promise to bring his own childhood photos next Christmas. A promise he agrees to readily when you’re out of earshot. 

You walk through the house, glass of rum and eggnog in hand--oblivious to the glances and stares Yuta throws your way as you drift in and out of his sight. 

--

Evening slips away into darkness and one by one your family disperses from the gathering--either to their beds upstairs or their own homes in the neighbourhood--and you're left staring blank faced at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. 

The thought of facing Yuta now without the distractions of family, food, and wine keeps you frozen in the bathroom for far too long. Held captive by your own fears. Fear of the inevitable rejection, fear of the aftermath, fear of laying next to him on your childhood bed in a cold, sleepless sweat. 

A soft knock at the door jolts you out of your spiralling thoughts; you open the door to see Yuta standing there in his pyjamas, an expression of mild concern painted on his face. "Are you okay? You've been in here a while," he brings a hand up to rest on your shoulder and you jump at the contact--deepening the crease of worry in his brow. 

"I'm fine, I’m just--" you gesture vaguely at nothing--excuses run dry. “I’m fine.” 

"If you say so," he shrugs, clearly unconvinced by your flimsy dismissal. "I can sleep on the floor if you want?" The single queen bed stares at you in all its floral robed glory and you take your lip between your teeth, worrying at the skin--an old habit you thought you were long past. 

You've spent many nights in the same bed as Yuta, usually either after a night of drinking or in an attempt to save money in an already discounted motel room during a road trip, but the thought of being so close to him now twists something inside if you. An adolescent worry at being so close to your crush. 

"No, it'll be fine" you lie, shaking your head. Yuta shrugs and slides under the comforter, holding it up for you to crawl in next to him. With a deep breath, you follow, body engulfed by the weight of the blanket and the warmth radiating off his body. "Night, Yuta," you flick the bedside lamp off and plunge yourself into the welcoming arms of darkness. 

You lay still, body tense for fear of brushing against his own accidentally. His breathing beside you is even and steady, a stark contrast to your own shaky inhalations, and you wonder briefly at how calm he is. Does he just not care? 

On one hand, the thought is a relief. The friendship might continue, unmarred at least on one side. Eventually you'll get over the pseudo-confession--push it to the back of your mind along with everything else.

On the other hand, the silence stings like that sharp pain of rejection. 

"Relax, ______," Yuta whispers into the dark, hand under the comforter moving towards your own. The familiar comfort of his grip seeking yours in an effort to soothe once more. 

"Sorry," you breathe, trying to force your body to release the tension stiffening your limbs to no avail. “Did--” you start, scrambling for a topic to alleviate the awkward silence, “did you enjoy dinner?” 

"You avoided me all night," the accusation comes finally and you brace yourself with a barricade of excuses. Yuta was rarely one to shy away from difficult conversations, a trait you usually admired but tonight for once wished he didn't have. 

"Sorry," his thumbs rubs small circles over yours and you resist both the urge to pull away and to pull yourself into him. To bury yourself and your worries into his chest. 

Yuta tugs your hand gently, a silent gesture for you to take the leap. To move closer. "Was it past tense or present tense?" He asks and you can hear a hint of hesitation in his voice, something not often there. It softens something inside of you even as the question confuses your thoughts further. 

"What?" 

"Were you in love with your lab partner, or are you in love with your lab partner?" Mistakenly you had thought you could get away--you could slip out of the inevitably uncomfortable conversation and pretend like nothing was different. Pretend like you always have. But Yuta doesn’t play those games. He pulls you gently, closer to his side, and you follow even while you prepare for the worst. Grateful the lights are off so he can't see the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. 

You swallow your pride, and speak the confession into his chest, "...are."

The world slows to a stop. You are keenly aware of his heartbeat as it races in his chest, the feel of his hand brushing against your arm. You can feel rather than see the wide grin as it grows across his face. "Good," he says, "because I'm also in love with my lab partner. Present tense."

The anticipation of rejection is replaced by a wave of shock as you look up at him through the dark. His face, so ingrained in your memory, swims before you in shadow as he reaches his head towards yours. You feel his breath before your lips meet, the warmth sending shivers over your whole body before finally he presses against you. Soft lips against your own, finally. You lean in eagerly, making up for all the time you've lost to fear and indecision, and Yuta laughs against you before pulling away. 

"Why didn't you say something sooner?" You ask, wrapping your arms around his waist. 

"Why didn't you?" He shrugs, as if that's answer enough. You roll your eyes and kiss him again, sinking into the feeling of reciprocated affections. "I was afraid of losing you," he whispers as you break away from each other. 

"We really are idiots aren't we?" You reply, tucking yourself back against his chest. 

"Yeah," he laughs and presses a kiss to the top of your head. “Mostly you.” 

“Wow, thanks, maybe we should stage that breakup after all,” you poke him in the sides, tension melting away into the mattress as the old familiar back and forth returns. The friendships has returned--tinted now with something more in the wake of a long overdue confession. 

“No,” he shakes his head, smoothing down your hair with his chin in the dark. “Wouldn’t want to disappoint your mom.”

“Oh, it’s alright, Xiaolong here needs to learn how to share things properly,” you motioned over to the said boy who still had his eyes on the little dragon in your hands, “I can’t believe he’s nearly five years old and doesn’t know what sharing is.”

“Jaeha’s the same way. It must be an age thing,” the man said with a chuckle, “Is he yours?”

Your eyes widened as you hurried to explain your relation to Xiaolong. “He’s not mine, I’m just here picking him up for my best friend. She has her hands full being a med student and all.”

“Ah, I see,” He remarked as he picked up Jaeha, “this little rascal is mine, though I wouldn’t trade her for anything else in the world.”

You felt a tug on your shirt and looked down to see Xiaolong still eyeing the toy. “No, Xiao, mommy is waiting for you at home. I can buy you a little dinosaur of your own if you want one so badly, how about that?” The boy broke into a smile at your offer.

“Oh, can you recommend some good kid’s stores in the area? I just moved here so I’m not too familiar with everything just yet.” The man informed you.

“At least you had the sense to come at the beginning of the school year, I pity the kids who are just thrown in during the middle of the school year,” you commented, “but the toy store I normally take this little guy to is the one near the end of this street, it’s in the little shopping center.”

“I’ll try taking Jaeha there once we get a little more settled in, thank you. My name is Taeil by the way. You are?”

“Y/n,” you said with a smile, “would you like my number? Like in case you ever need anything?”

“Yeah, sure! That’s very kind of you.” His voice was very sweet and kind of calming, you noticed.

When you were dropping Xiaolong of at Furou’s apartment, you couldn’t help but let her in on your encounter from just a little earlier. “Is he cute?” She asked, excited to hear you talk about a new man after your last relationship didn’t go so well.

“He is, but he Furou, I just told you that he has a daughter. He probably has a wife or at least a girlfriend if anything.” You didn’t want to get your hopes up in case this was true.

Furou hummed out in thought, “yeah well, you never know.”

You shrugged your shoulders, indifferent to the whole situation. “If you ever need me to pick him up again, feel free to call.” You said, nodding over to Xiaolong who was busying himself in front of the TV with his collection of toys.

A week later and you find yourself in a similar situation from the daycare, except this time it’s at the local swim center where you were supposed to be picking Xiaolong up from.

The only difference was that this time Taeil had gotten to the two fighting kids before you did. “Jaeha, no, Xiaolong had the goggles before you did. You can’t just take them from him when he’s clearly using them.”

Xiaolong made a face at her, seeing as how her own father sided with him. Jaeha made the same mocking face back at him. “But Daddy, he’s being mean.” She whined.

“That doesn’t mean that you have to act the same back to him.” Taeil explained calmly to the irritated four-year-old.

“Jaeha, how about you apologize to Xiaolong so he knows you’re sorry.” You proposed, joining Taeil where he stood in front of the two kids, both still dripping from being in the pool.

Jaeha let out a sigh before turning to Xiaolong. “I’m sorry for taking your goggles.” She admitted plainly.

“And?” Taeil prompted.

“And I won’t do it again.” Jaeha concluded.

You turned to Xiaolong, “do you accept her apology?”

“Do I have to?” He questioned.

“No, but it would be nice if you did.” You replied.

“Okay, then I guess I will.” You made a mental note to tell Furou that her son was getting increasingly sassier by the day so she better watch her mouth around him.

After both kids were sent off to go wash up and change, Taeil spoke up as you both waited for them to return. “Sorry about that again. If you don’t mind, how about I take you to lunch sometime as an apology.”

“No apology necessary but I like the sound of that. Are you free this week?” You inquired.

“Yes, actually. Does Friday work for you?” He appealed.

“It sure does,” you informed him with a smile, “we can talk about the details over text, the kids are coming back.”

Taeil’s smile mirrored yours as he agreed with you, “sounds like a plan.”

As you were dropping Xiaolong off at Furou’s once again, you told her about the new development in your relationship with Taeil. “Okay but no taken man would ask out a woman to lunch.” She commented.

“It could just be in a friendly manner because he said ‘as an apology’ for the kids fighting at swim class.” You reasoned.

“Check his ring finger,” Furou sighed out, “you need to check it next time you see him or else I really will strangle you.”

Your eyes widen at her statement. “Not every married or taken person wears a ring these days.”

Furou put her head in her hands. “You’re really frustrating to work with, you know,” she pauses as she looks back at you, “I’m rooting for you, I really am, so stop making excuses and actually try, will you?”

“Fine, fine, but if, and only if, he is single and is ready to be in a relationship.” You decided.

“Fair enough.” Furou agreed.

It was currently Wednesday and you had told your coworkers Xiaojun and Hendery about your upcoming dating on Friday. The three of you were hired around the same time under the marketing branch of Neo Corp. and quickly grew close to each other after finding out you were all the same age.

Part of your job as being part of the marketing team was to come up with possible marketing strategies for the company, which Hendery excelled at. Though sometimes, he got a little too extreme and that’s where Xiaojun comes in to moderate him. You did a little bit of both, coming up with the ‘Gen Z’ type of ideas with Hendery but also keeping things realistic and reasoning with Xiaojun why some ideas are better than others. Such was the case with your situation with Taeil.

“Do you know where he plans on going for lunch then?” Xiaojun asks, excited to hear about an actual possible relationship as opposed to Hendery’s weekly hook-ups.

You shook your head, “he said he would text me but he hasn’t yet.”

“Are you sure he even has your number?” Hendery chimed in.

“Yes, I’m sure. I told you that we traded numbers after the preschool incident.” You breathed out, wondering just how Hendery got himself hired.

He held his hands up in defense, “just double-checking.”

At that moment, your phone vibrated and you picked it up without much thought.

Unknown > y/n

11:46pm: Hi y/n, this is Taeil. I thought about this for a bit, and it’s actually quite embarrassing to admit, but I don’t really know where would be a good place to go for Friday. I’m open to any suggestions you have though, I trust your taste.

“Oh my gosh, guys he just texted me,” you exclaimed, “he said that he doesn’t know where to go and wants me to suggest somewhere to go.”

“How would he not know where to go?” Hendery wondered in disbelief.

“Hey, not everyone is level 100 at dating like you are.” Xiaojun teased though Hendery took it as a compliment and winked at him while laughing. “Anyways,” Xiaojun continued, “maybe you could go to that little coffee shop down the street. The one we ordered the sandwiches from last week.”

“Those were some pretty good sandwiches” Hendery interjected.

“Hmm, I actually like the sound of that. I’ll send him the address for it, thanks guys.” You told them appreciatively.

Xiaojun spun around in his chair, “wow, I can’t believe our y/n is finally going on a date for the first time in over a whole year.”

You looked up to shoot him a look. “It doesn’t help when all you men are so weird.”

“She’s not wrong.” Hendery commented in agreement.

When Friday came around, you couldn’t help but be excited for your little date with Taeil. You had even somehow managed to sneak out ten minutes before your lunch break began, though you probably should have just left then instead.

There was the familiar ding of the elevator when you hit the button and you hoped it wouldn’t take long since the indicator above the door showed it was coming down from one of the higher floors. You also hoped it would be empty since that was the floor the executives were on and you didn’t really want to be caught leaving for lunch earlier than you should be.

Luck clearly was not on your side when the door opened, revealing your director, Taeyong along with none other than Taeil. “...yeah she’s really nice and pretty cute too. I met her when I was picking up Jaeha from swim-” He barely managed to stop himself mid-sentence when he realized your presence.

“Good afternoon, Ms. y/n.” Taeyong greeted you as you stepped into the elevator next to him.

“Good afternoon to you too, Mr. Lee.” You replied, not missing the pout he made when you referred to him so formally.

“I told you to just call me Taeyong, we’ve worked together for almost five years now.” He whined, childishly stomping his foot to help get his point across.

You shook your head with a laugh. “I can’t help it, you’re my boss and we’re at work. When we’re not on the clock then maybe I’ll call you Taeyong,” you couldn’t hide your smile at the way his eyes filled with hope because of your words, “but right now you’re Mr. Lee, chief marketing officer of Neo Corp. and my head director, so let’s keep things professional.”

Taeyong let out another grumble, causing Taeil to chuckle, inadvertently reminding Taeyong of his presence. “Oh, right! Ms. y/n, this is Taeil, chief information officer. He just transferred over from our branch in Korea.”

You looked over at Taeil, unsure of how to react in case he wanted to keep your relationship on the low. “Ah, I actually met y/n last week.” He informed Taeyong, the two of them sharing a knowing look.

The elevator chimed once again as it slowed to a stop at a different floor. “Well it’s nice to know that you’re making friends here, Taeil,” Taeyong remarked as he stepped out of the elevator, “but I’ll see the two of you around, no funny business in the elevator!”

You laughed as the doors shut and the elevator continued on to the ground floor. “So, chief information officer? Really?” You asked in disbelief, turning to Taeil.

“Yeah, really.” He replied, a hand behind his neck as he looked away shyly. “I wasn’t planning on saying much about my job but since you’re in the company anyway, I guess there’s nothing to hide.”

“If anything, I have more to hide.” You joked, immediately stopping to explain when you see Taeil’s worried expression. “I mean like, with me leaving early for lunch right now and the other stuff that goes on in the marketing department since you’re an executive and all.”

“Oh, you can still talk to me, I promise I won’t tell Taeyong.” He said as you shot him a look while the elevator dinged once again, signaling its arrival.

Continuing your conversation on the walk to the cafe, you asked Taeil “why did you move here, especially since Jaeha is so young?”

“I was actually just recently promoted after the former head director retired,” he explained, “the branch in Korea isn’t as developed as the one here so the company asked me to move out to this one just to make things easier.” You nodded your head to let him know you were listening. “As for Jaeha, the timing worked out with school just starting up.”

“Don’t you have a wife or girlfriend that you could have left her with?” You question, hoping the question wasn’t too invasive.

Taeil hesitates a bit before responding. “Her mother...she passed away two years ago. I’ve spent so long mourning her loss and only recently did I decide that it was time for a change and the promotion came just like that.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“No it’s totally fine, I understand where the curiosity came from.” Taeil interrupted, which you weren’t upset about at all.

Speaking with Taeil was surprisingly easy considering the fact that you’ve only known him for a little over a week. Even as the two of you ate, it wasn’t awkward like you thought it would be. You were able to connect with him as you spoke about the best places to shop or go to hang out. You even had enough confidence to ask him out on a date to one of the latter places, which he agrees to.

This first date turned into a second, then a third, and even up to a sixth. Xiaojun and Hendery are always asking for the latest details, wanting to be kept up to date with your budding relationship. You made sure to keep Furou in the loop too since she was the one who helped to start this relationship by asking you to pick up her son from preschool. Though again, she had called you to pick him up from his swim lessons since it was finals season and she forgot she had a paper due at midnight.

It was already November and the fall weather was changing to winter, even the heated indoor pool was not enough to keep the chill out of the room, causing you to shiver just a bit as you waited for Xiaolong’s class to end. You distracted yourself by watching the kids swim back and forth with their instructors and got so caught up in it that you nearly jumped out of your skin when Taeil sat down next to you.

Both of you laughed at the situation and began talking about anything that came to mind whether it be about work, Jaeha’s antics at home, a new recipe you tried out, you really felt like you could talk to Taeil about anything. It was quite disappointing when you heard the chatter from the kids as they all began getting out of the pool and going to change out of their swimwear.

You said goodbye to Taeil when Xiaolong and Jaeha came out, bickering as usual, though it seemed to be more friendly since it was about which superhero would win in a fight though neither side really wanted to admit defeat. As much as you wanted to watch them continue their debate, you knew Furou would be waiting for you so you helped Taeil end it and take the kids out of the building.

As you were getting into your car, you hear an engine struggling to start from nearby though you pay it no mind since the cold weather can cause cars to act up. You looked around, trying to figure out which car it was when you realized that the engine really wasn’t starting and found a very frustrated looking Taeil getting out of his car and opening the hood of it.

You told Xiaolong you’d be back in a bit before leaving to offer Taeil help in any way possible. You didn’t really know much about cars so it just ended up being you offering him a ride home, which he gratefully accepted since the sun was starting to set and the temperature continued dropping.

Taeil smiled at you once both of the kids were secured in the backseat and resumed their previous argument. “Thanks for being so nice and helping me out like this. You really didn’t have to.”

“I didn’t have to,” you agree, “but I wanted to.” You saw Taeil make a face out of the corner of your eye. “I’m sorry, was that too cheesy?”

“It was cheesy but I like it.” He chuckled, which was not a surprise to you after hearing the jokes he often makes.

The ride to Taeil’s apartment was rather peaceful aside from the kids in the back and it ended a little too soon for your liking but it seemed that Taeil was thinking the same was since he graciously invited you inside for a bit to thank you.

Jaeha was getting tired and cranky and started actually arguing with Xiaolong though Taeil quickly put it to rest when he turned on the TV and put on a show that he claims Jaeha has been really into these days. As soon as the kids are successfully distracted, the two of you decide to move your conversation to the kitchen where you won’t disturb them.

“Taeyong has been asking about you a lot these days.” He informs you.

You raise an eyebrow at this. “Really? What does he say about me?”

“Oh, nothing much. Just telling me to take good care of you and how he’ll send me back to Korea if I hurt one of his favorite employees.” He shakes his head at the playfulness of his fellow executive. “I didn’t know you were one of his favorites though.”

“You’d never believe this but he hired me on the spot after seeing a few of the ads I had put together for other companies.” You pulled out your phone to see if you still had pictures of them that you could show to Taeil. “Mr. Suh even said that he thinks Taeyong may or may not have had a crush on me, though he was leaning strongly towards the ‘may have’ side.”

“Ah, that’s Johnny alright. Always getting up in other people’s business. I’m surprised he’s not on me the way Taeyong is though.” Taeil laughed.

“Isn’t he busy with the foreign expansion project? Or is that not under his watch?” You ask.

Taeil shook his head, “it’s under him but he’s working with HR and finances as well so things are taking a while.”

“It’s HR, what do you expect?” You joke, drawing a chuckle from Taeil too.

“But anyway, I’m glad Taeyong didn’t act on his possible crush on you.” He states.

“Oh? And why is that?” You questioned.

“Well, you see, I actually really-” He was cut off by the sound of your phone ringing.

You pick it up, checking the caller ID, and let out a gasp when you see it was Furou and just how late it had gotten. “Hold on, I have to take this. Hello?”

You’re answered by the audio of Marlin from Nemo going “have you seen my son? Have you seen my son?” and nearly snort from how ironic it was.

“Sorry, I stopped by somewhere else for a bit. I’ll bring Xiao back in a bit, I promise.” You told Furou.

“Okay, but hurry up, his dinner's getting cold.” She grumbled.

You rolled your eyes, forgetting that she couldn’t see you. “You have a microw-” the beeping over the line interrupted you and you pulled the phone away from your ear only to see that she hung up on you. “That bitch, I swear-”

“Xiaolong’s mom?” Taeil guessed.

You nodded your head and let out a sigh. “I should get going before she gets any more pressed on where her son is. I’ll text you when I get home.”

“Alright, please drive safely.” He tells you as he goes to get Xiaolong from the living room.

The first snow had fallen in the second week of December, indicating that it was time for the annual marketing department’s holiday party. Most, if not all, of the people in the department, looked forward to the party since Taeyong had declared it to be totally informal, no treating people as superiors in the workplace, no formal mentions of names, nothing.

You knew a fairly large amount of people in the marketing department and most of them knew each other as well so it was easy to pinpoint an unfamiliar face in the crowd. “Who’s that guy in the corner over there?” Hendery asks you as you both stood in line for the buffet.

You looked over, finding the person in question, only to realize it was Taeil. Next to him was Taeyong who had caught you staring and waved at you. Taeil turned as well, smiling as you waved over at them before sending you a little finger heart. “Okay, now I really want to know who he is. What was all that about?” Hendery pressed.

“Can’t you see? That’s clearly Taeil,” Xiaojun butted in, “who else would she be giggling about when they send her a heart like that? You’re so dense sometimes.”

“Hey! That’s only sometimes though.” Hendery defends, emphasizing the word ‘sometimes’. “Let’s go sit at the table next to them. Xiaojun go sit down before someone else does.”

Xiaojun let out a whine. “That means I have to get out of line and get back in line once you guys already have your food though.”

“We won’t start eating without you, I promise.” You tell him.

Xiaojun caves at that and goes “ugh, fine” as he walks over to the table next to Taeyong, Taeil, and the other higher-ups.

“That promise only extends to you right? You didn’t say ‘we promise’, right?” Hendery whispers into your ear.

Scoffing, you hit his shoulder, “Be nice.” He rubs the spot where you hit him and mocks your expression.

Hendery’s teasing continues throughout all the games like ‘pin the tail on Taeyong’ when he insisted that you do it on Taeil, which Taeyong even supported and allowed to happen. This paired with when Hendery screamed out yours and Taeil’s names for the pocky challenge was really pushing your buttons but you couldn’t deny the fact that you enjoyed being with Taeil and getting to feel the slightest brush of his lips against yours.

“So, do you have any plans for the holidays?” You ask him as you take the seat next to him, seeing as how Hendery was actively talking to Taeyong who was currently in yours.

Taeil lightly hummed “mmm, no, not really. Why?”

“I was just gonna say that if you don’t have anywhere else better to be, I’d like it a lot if you were to come over to my apartment sometime.” You say shyly.

“I like that too,” he admits with a smile, “how about Christmas Eve? That way we don’t get in your way in case you have any plans for Christmas?”

“Yeah, that sounds good to me.” Laughter erupted from the table next to you and you looked over to see Taeyong all but choking down your glass of water with a half-eaten pepper in front of him while Hendery films him with his phone. “Thank god we’re off for the rest of the week.” Taeil nods in agreement.

It was Taeil’s idea to cook dinner together since he didn’t want you to go through the hassle of making a large meal on your own. You were thankful though since you didn’t really trust your own cooking abilities, especially since you were fine with just eating whatever since it was usually just you eating the food you made.

Taeil was, by far, a much more skilled cook than you though he never once made you feel bad about it, instead of teaching you and giving you tips every so often. Being able to cook with him made the time go by so much faster and it made you wish that cooking was like this all the time.

The two of you took your servings of food to the living room and ate on the couch, Jaeha seated on the floor in front of both of you, the Hallmark movie on TV illuminating your living room. The movie was barely even halfway through when you hear the slightest of snores from Jaeha.

The little girl had cleaned off her plate and was now dozing off, the tiniest bit of drool forming at the corner of her lip. “I think that’s a sign that I should get going soon.” Taeil whispers, careful not to wake his daughter.

“You can stay if you want.” You tell him.

He shakes his head, “no, I really should get going. I’d rather wake her up now and get her home sooner than have her get a weird sleeping schedule going.”

“No, I mean like, you can stay the night if you’d like.”

“A-are you sure?” Taeil asks, eyes growing wide.

“Of course.”

“In that case, there’s something I want to do first.” He pulled out his phone and began typing before holding it above both of your heads.

You look up at his phone at back at him in confusion, “what are you-”

“It’s mistletoe, look!” He showed you his phone screen and sure enough, it was an image of mistletoe hanging from the ceiling.

Rolling your eyes, you tell him, “if you want me to kiss you, you could have just asked.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Then can I just ask you to be my girlfriend?”

You froze with your mouth slightly open. “Moon Taeil, that is like, the smoothest thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

“Sooooo is that a yes?”

“Definitely a yes,” you set your plate down on the side and leaned over from where you were sitting, closing the distance between you and Taeil, “now how about that kiss?”

Taeil’s lips met yours and couldn’t believe how soft they were. You felt his hand come up to caress your cheek as your lips slowly began moving together. His lips parted ever so slightly but before either of you could do anything, “Dear Santa, my wish is to never see this happen ever again.”

You and Taeil broke apart from each other, looking down to see Jaeha with her hands over her eyes. Taeil picked her up and settled her in between both of you. “Well, sweetie, you’re going to have to get used to it because you’re going to be seeing y/n a lot more often now.”

“Who said I was tattling?” the younger male defended as he followed Mark into his room, “I was expressing how I was being left out.”

“By going to Taeyong to call Johnny a jerk without saying it to his face?”

Jisung just crossed his arms and huffed. “I’m just tired of being treated like a baby around here.”

Mark patted his shoulder. “Then, don’t act like one, and Johnny was messing with you.”

That reply earned him an eye roll. He meant well, but Mark didn’t always say the right thing correctly.

“By the way,” the older boy added, “since Sierra and Alex are coming, you’ve been assigned to bunk with Alex for tonight.”

“I’m aware,” Jisung shrugged.

“You didn’t let me finish. Alex is scared of the dark, and knowing you don’t have a nightlight for him, don’t be surprised if he wakes up screaming and crying.”

Mark walked off without another word to go help another member to pack.

“Pizza’s here!” Jaehyun called from the kitchen.

Immediately, everyone dropped what they were doing and headed towards the kitchen, Jisung trailing behind them as he was still moody from his members rejecting them. He loved them dearly, but being the youngest of twenty-three members proved to be wrong sometimes. The only two members closest to his age were Sungchan and Chenle, but even they weren’t babied as much as he was.

As he crossed the front entryway, he noticed a cop by the door somewhat taking a look around the house and wanting someone to speak to. No one robbed them as far as he knew, but he really couldn’t be bothered.

Most of the members had sat down to eat already, plates full of two or three slices of their favorite kind. Despite having eaten some ramen earlier out of frustration from not being able to see his girlfriend Sunhee, Jisung grabbed a plate and anticipated having just a slice of cheese.

“Daddy, what time are we leaving tomorrow?” Alex asked Johnny.

“Early,” he replied, “we’re leaving at eight in the morning.”

“Sweetheart, the pizza boy needs 133000 won,” Taeyong’s wife Savannah told him as she was feeding Hayden some bite-sized beef slices.

“For pizza?” he replied as he was getting some milk.

“Ten pizzas times 12000 won.”

“You want us to pay for it?” Johnny offered.

“Nope, we’ve got it,” Taeyong shook his head as he searched his wallet.

Jisung opened a few boxes of pizzas, but couldn’t find any cheese. The boxes were either empty or had some sort of topping.

“Did anyone get a plain cheese?” he asked.

Lucas, who was standing by and shoving slices into his mouth, smirked and said, “Well, yeah, we did. But if you want any, someone’s gonna have to barf it all up.”

If anyone knew how to mess around with people, it was Lucas, but it was always out of love. He had a younger brother himself, so he was somewhat of an expert on picking and poking at people. However, he had no knowledge of Jisung’s frustration, yet it was no excuse for the joke he was pulling on the maknae.

“Jisung,” Lucas cried as he made a shocked face, “quick grab a plate!” He slumped over mockingly and made gagging sounds before chuckling at his own joke.

This, mixed with the worry of Alex’s midnight banshee screams and being left out all day, triggered Jisung’s anger and pushed him over the edge. In one swift motion, he balled up his fist and punched the older boy in his face. Hard.

Lucas ended up stumbling backwards, his elbows hit the cups filled with sodas and water; and it all spilled onto the-

“Passports!” Taeil cried as he and Johnny worked quickly to rescue them.

The other members helped with drying them, and Kun and Jeno pulled the fighting boys apart. Lucas’s nose was bleeding, but thankfully it wasn’t broken. Alex was startled by the chaos and started crying, and Sierra took him out the kitchen to calm him down.

Taeyong, in full dad mode now, finally stepped in and raised his voice at Jisung. “What is the matter with you?”

“He started it!” Jisung snapped. “He knows I don’t like the other toppings.”

The maknae knew it wasn’t just Lucas’s antics that made him lash out, but rather everything from that day. However, there would still be consequences to his actions.

“Look what you did, dummy!” Ten snapped as he was trying to dry his soda-stained jeans.

Jisung looked around at his members. It was all silence, except for Alex’s sniffles in the next room. Everyone else just had a look of disappointment on their faces as they stared back at him.

“Jisung, just go to your room,” Taeyong finally sighed.

“Why?”

With a huff, Taeyong pulled the maknae by his elbow. He complied and Taeyong was able to let go of him as he knew that Jisung wasn’t Alex’s age.

“Why do I always get treated like trash?” Jisung demanded.

The police officer and pizza boy were still standing by the door.

“I’m sorry,” the leader chuckled as he pulled out the money for the delivery boy. “With so many people going on a trip, it’s a little crazy. Some of our members have young children, so the chaos escalates a bit. It’s just nuts.”

He paid the pizza boy, and the young man wished them a Merry Christmas before walking out of the door.

“Having a reunion or something?” the officer asked.

“No,” Taeyong replied. “The group has some time off for the holidays, and some of us have families of our own, so we want to spend Christmas and New Year’s with them. Paris is where we’re heading.”

“To Paris, you say?”

“Yeah, We hope to leave tomorrow morning.”

“Excellent.”

Jisung just rolled his eyes. Why was the officer here in the first place?

“If you’ll excuse me, this one’s out of sorts. I’ll be right back.”

Taeyong guided the maknae by the shoulder, and the officer called to them, “Don’t worry about me. I spoke to your wife already. And don’t worry about your home. It’s in good hands.”

NCT’s leader marched the boy up the stairs as the man left the premises. “There are twenty-three members in our group, and you’re the only one who has to make trouble.”

“I’m the only one getting dumped on,” Jisung shot back.

“You’re the only one acting up. Now, get in the room.”

He had led them to the guest room instead of Jisung’s bedroom.

“The guest room?”

“Go.”

“It’s scary in there.”

Taeyong didn’t buy his guilt trip. “Don’t be silly. Alex will be up in a little while.”

“I’m not sharing a room with Alex. You know about him. He screams in the middle of the night.”

The leader sighed and massaged his temples. “Fine. We’ll put Alex somewhere. Just get in there and cool off.”

Jisung had already chilled out by now. He tried to apologize, but Taeyong shook his had and said, “It’s too late. Go.” If a frustrated huff, he stomped into the room.

“I don’t want to see you again until tomorrow morning,” the leader said just before closing the door.

Plopping face down on the bed, he pulled out his phone and texted Sunhee, who wasn’t able to join the group due to her having plans with her family for Christmas. She was quick to respond. Sunhee was one of the sweetest people anyone could ever meet, and Jisung was happy she was his. His career did make it difficult to see her sometimes, but he always tried to make time for her. It was just as frustrating for her as she was about to graduate high school and working hard to stay on top of homework and final projects. Jisung ranted about how he felt he was being pushed around by everyone and just wanted to stop being treated like a baby, as he was eighteen years old. Sunhee was very understanding as she was one of the youngest of her cousins, but she said something similar to Mark in a much more kind manner. He knew they were right, but it somehow stuck with him more than the way the older boy had said it.

After they talked, Jisung put his phone down and got ready for bed.

-

Silence.

The only sound Jisung woke up to was silence. Not a word, a child’s babbling, or even a footstep could be heard from outside the bedroom. Maybe everyone was in the kitchen eating breakfast before heading to the airport. He didn’t bother checking his phone before stepping out into the hallway.

The lights were on, so that was a good sign, at least. Some of the doors were open, some were closed. He peeked into a few of them, but they were empty with piles of mess of some sort in each room.

“Taeyong?” he called out as he made his way to the kitchen. “Taeyong? Mark? Johnny? Lucas? Savannah? Sierra?”

He continued calling out everyone’s names, even the ones who were just starting to talk. After calling for Jeno, he gave up. Was he alone in the house? He sat down at the table and remembered everything he had been jabbed with the night before.

“Tattling is for six year olds. That should have died out for you twelve years ago.”

“…if you want any, someone’s gonna have to barf it all up.”

“There are twenty-three members in our group, and you’re the only one who has to make trouble.”

“Look what you did, dummy!”

Now, Jisung didn’t feel so bad. He realized that the members had left and possibly forgotten him, but now he had some freedom for a while before they could realize anything. Soon, he was dressed, danced whatever choreo around the house to whatever music he desired, and even went through the other members’ personal stuff as well.

Lucas’s, however, was a gold mine. He had some things from his family such as a letter from his parents and a picture of him and his younger brother, and a white Louis Vuitton purse with Sydni’s (his girlfriend) name tagged on it, which must have been a Christmas gift for her. What hit the jackpot was some firecrackers hidden beneath some magazines. Jisung wasn’t sure how Lucas sneaked them in, but there they were.

Once they were placed in his room for the time being, Jisung decided to make a huge ice cream sundae for himself with a side of snacks. He put in an old drama titled Filthy Souled Angels. A mafia piece, he thought. Interesting.

The drama began with a man in a trench coat and fedora entering an office of some sort.

“It’s me, Weasel,” the man told an older gentleman sitting at a desk. “I got the stuff.”

“Leave it on the doorstep,” the older man shouted at him, “and get the hell out of here.”

“All right, Junseo, but what about my money?”

“What money?”

“Acey said you had some for me.”

“Is that a fact? How much do I owe you?”

“Acey said 10%.”

The older man, Junseo, smirked. “Too bad Acey ain’t in charge no more.”

As he watched and snacked in the living room, he called out, “Guys, I’m eating junk and watching a mafia drama. You better come out and stop me.”

“He’ll call when he gets out of prison,” Junseo continued, Weasel looking defeated. “Hey, I’ll tell you what I’m going to give you, Weasel’ –Junseo pulled out a rifle from under his desk and aimed it at Weasel- “I’m going to give you to the count of ten to get your ugly, yellow no-good ass off my property before I pump your guts full of lead.”

“All right, Junseo, I’m sorry,” Weasel backed up. “I’m going.”

“1, 2, 10.” Junseo opened fire at the Weasel, cackling as the man dropped to his knees and died on the spot.

This surprised Jisung, and he was quick to cover his eyes as it scared him so bad. He kept his eyes covered until the last bullet was fired and Junseo said, “Keep the change, you filthy animal.”