Negative
I must sound like the most negative person ever, I don't mean too. I tend to be a very negative person, always worrying about what could go wrong rather than focusing on the things that go right, I do that in every aspect of my life from relationships to work and everything inbetween. I'm easily upset, just a glimpse of myself in the mirror can ruin my day. I've thought about covering them all up around my house so I don't have to look in them but that seems a tad over dramatic. I feel like I'm stuck in this limbo between knowing whats wrong with me and why I can't lose weight, and being able to do anything about it. The diagnosis came at a really busy time, I'm deeeeeeep into planning and getting ready for my 21st birthday (which btw, is the reason I was trying so hard to lose weight) and until its over, in about 4 weeks, I have absolutely no free time to make any appointments. I just hope I can make it through my birthday without falling apart. I put so much effort and stock into losing weight for it that I'm completely devastated that I didn't achieve my goals, even though I have an explanation now. It's soul crushing to me and I hate myself now more than ever. I should bring up my negative attitudes when i eventually do go to talk to someone, which will probably have to be after my birthday aswell....
