#negative btw

I don’t like being called by nicknames but lately I hate the sound of my own name and I don’t know why

I’ve thought about my gender and that hasn’t helped, I don’t feel any differently about it than I did a few years ago, I’m still a cis female. I’m pretty sure. I don’t know, I like thinking of myself as not that, but I only like she/her pronouns, so I can’t call myself anything else

I don’t know how I feel about romance or sex, but those don’t feel like part of my identity, so I haven’t thought as hard about that as every other part of myself

It feels like my whole personality is trying to do a 180 because this is SO out of the blue, and I don’t understand it. Suddenly I don’t like who I am and I want to change myself? I’m thinking about every aspect of myself…

The sound of my own name makes me feel upset and I don’t understand

I know what I want to be called, but I can’t ask anyone to call me that. It’s too embarrassing.