#naruyasu

If that’s so… Then maybe a little curveball couldn’t hurt. Hopefully this would scare them off from making anymore stupid comments for a good while.

“Oh, but I am spending time with my wife! I just felt it wouldn’t be right to start this business without my beloved. We’re partners in life and death, after all.”

Monk choked on his spit and began to inch away from him, while Mai was frozen stiff. Good start, good start– he just needed to pull this in a direction even the investigation team wouldn’t expect. It wouldn’t be any fun if he started getting predictable. Shibuya still seemed to be flipping through the information they’d been handed, distracted. Perfect.

“I mean, I wouldn’t even be here had it not been for their support. I’ve always said we work better together, and truly, it’s the key to my success.”

Osamu walked past the men and straight towards Shibuya and Mai. She shook her head vigorously at him, but he only winked in response. Turning back to the frauds, he wrapped his arm around Shibuya-san and pulled him close to his side. Osamu beamed.

“My dear wife Narumi is the light of my life. I couldn’t bear to spend time away from him even for work, y’see? That’s why I made him my assistant.”

One could hear a pin drop in the silence that followed. Shibuya had a look of disbelief on his normally stoic face, one which Mai shared. Takigawa seemed to be trying his best not to laugh, but the red blotches on his face and the hand slapped against his mouth did him no favors. The shorter of the men sputtered, whilst the proclaimed famous researcher simply looked awkward.

After a moment of huffing, the stout investigator seemed to regain his footing and asked smugly.

“If that’s really your ‘wife’, then where are both of your rings?”

Osamu sighed, shaking his head as if to say ‘you should know better’.

“Don’t you know how easy it is to lose your ring in this line of work? It makes me worry for your own wife… That’s why I keep my wedding band on a necklace! It’s much safer.”

He reached into his shirt and pulled out a chain, attached to which was a plain ring. Osamu put on a stern face and grabbed the boss’ hand, intertwining their fingers. Shibuya, surprisingly, was receptive to the manhandling and let him have his fun. He returned to reading the leaflet disinterestedly.

“It’s rude to question true love, don’t you know? Marriage is a sacred act and should be treated with respect. Narumi and I have a love that transcends even time itself. Every morning I wake up next to him is-” 

“-Gah, I get it! Good day, sir!” The man spun on his heel and stomped off, covering his ears firmly with his hands and a nauseous expression. Dr. ‘Davis’ followed shortly behind, looking back and forth at Shibuya and him. Once the two were out of hearing range, Osamu rubbed his neck bashfully– an unapologetic grin on his face.

“Well, that was easier than expected.”

He looked to the side and was met with Mai’s flushed cheeks. The poor girl was as red as a tomato. Her hands were also held firmly against her mouth, and soon laughter pealed out of her in waves. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back, and Monk’s raucous laughter soon joined. 

Woow~ this role gave him the power to let loose. It was really too much fun teasing older folks. Maybe he should try and convince the big boss to let him act as the face for the company more often.

Then, Shibuya-san spoke up.

“At least try to make it believable next time. I would never marry someone less beautiful than myself.”

He flipped closed the leaflet and shrugged off Osamu’s arm, walking off without a glance back.

They sat in stunned silence before a single thought crossed all of their minds.

What a narcissist.