#narubabe babbling

being single is soooo hard sob sob

you haven’t had casual sex in the past two weeks? omg something must be wrong with you, someone call 911

the only way to deal with a break-up with someone you loved deeply is to have a one-night-stand immediately

i know you told me that you’re happy being single but i’ll pressure you until you say yes to this blind date i organized for you because i think you really need to get laid

the real college experience means screwing everything with a heartbeat. that’s it. no education or platonic friendships, just sex with everyone

your virginity is a burden that you have to get rid off asap so why wait until you actually like and trust someone when you can just go to a bar and do it with a stranger, hashtag romance is dead you baby

you have to fuck at least 20 people and have one (1) threesome before you get together with your one true love (who you’ve loved all along) because only then you are “”ready”” to settle down