Notes from “How to See Clearly” a talk by Alan Watts
By letting myself be
in all of my onlyness
do I discover that I (already) Am.
It's by 'trying, willing, controlling, enduring' that we expend energy actually going against ourselves (1)
instead of staying in the centredness and peace of having the freedom to just be.
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(1) How we go against ourselves Any form of trying = 'pulling yourself together, getting uptight, having constricted muscles, holding breath' is to control the functioning of nervous system in a way that in fact does not effect / support its _proper_ functioning or operation anyway. We think it's resulting in the psychological effects we want to, but it doesn't.
Example analogy: feeling nervous and fastening seat belts and stressing in the plane just before the plane takes off. The mind becomes preoccupied in the doing that we do not get to see clearly.
When our nervous system or an organ is working properly or fully functioning, we don't feel it (eg. seeing, breathing, digesting). We don't need to feel our "I" to function properly.
On the Ego being the sole obstacle to mystical vision
When we are aware of the ego "I", we are aware of the chronic, futile tension that we don't want to be 'married' to.
(A joke:) With whom are you in love against?
By 'wanting' to change (=desire), we hang on to the (little) "I" existence. Analogy: (Like) Lifting yourself up with your own bootstraps ie. you can't.
Getting rid of the ego is HARD work. eg. How can I stop identifying myself with the wrong me
Hence religion producing hypocrisy and guilt.
The biggest ego trip going IS getting rid of your ego. [In Yoga, ego is treated as part of a layer of the mind]
"A fool who persists in his folly will become wise" Teachers help speed up the folly when they ‘teach’ you you can control your mind.
There is no "method". Even finding methods to get rid of the ego is still a method, a desire, a cause for suffering, _including_ the desire not to have desires or suffering.
So long as you think the transformation of your consciousness is something you can bring about, it will be a frustrated endeavour. One also riddled with endless games of one-upmanship and competitiveness of who/what method can do better, faster etc.
It/the ego can disappear only in the realisation of its own futility.
A time when a natural quietness comes to you.
Hence being able to ‘save yourself’ and have a divine experience through the Grace of God.
You cannot catch hold of it, Nor can you get rid of it, In not being able to get it, you get it, When you speak, it's silent. When you're silent, it speaks. -Zen Buddhist quote
The main obstacle to mystical vision is you / the little "I" / ego. You do not 'have to' transform yourself, you _already_ are.
The thinker of thoughts, is just another thought, The feeler of feelings was just one of the feelings, The experience of the experience is just part of the experience.
Things can't initiate a process into action. Action is caused by the operative principle of Consciousness / controller / doer / ego.
Things are just happening. = this is yourSelf. <3 <3
Nature is just knowing.
There are feelings / thoughts. [Like clouds in the sky that you are, or the wind passing by]
See things, reality as it is, as they are, an idea / the projection of Consciousness that You are.
We live only in an eternal now.
Alan Watts - How to see clearly (talk): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tS4LRDm7Ts
