Changkyun for Dazed September issue
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Changkyun for Dazed September issue

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10pm (Part II)
10pm (Part II)
pairing: im changkyun x reader words: 3,580 genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah warnings: none rate: g summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
10PM (Part I)
A/N : Oh haii, so I just happened to make a part II of this , just finished my final exam and now bored waiting for my brother to pick me up from school T_T. Enjoyyy <3 Changkyunâs POV
      11pm, Saturday, Iâm currently at Jooheonâs place together with the guys, everyone were silent for a moment but Minhyuk decided to kill the silence and suggested to have a beer. Jooheon and Wonho cheered and the rest just agreed about it, while for me I think I needed few cans of it. My mind is floating, y/nâs face is still very clear in my head. Right now Iâm contemplating how will I text her, or should I call her. I know it should be the best thing that I should do, but I canât seem to have the courage to do so. This feeling of guilt is just so new to me, Iâve been holding my phone for a while waiting for her to text me how angry she was, how she hates me. I think that would be better than not getting any, it seriously makes me anxious.
âSo Changkyun what are you gonna do about it?â Shownu asked after taking the last gulp from his can before tossing it to the bin. I just shrug taking a sip from my can as well.
âYou know what? Given y/nâs attitude I think she will just sleep her anger away and be after you again the next day.â Minhyuk said while munching his pizza.
âMe too, me too, y/n is sure to be head over heels with you Kkung.â Jooheon seconded nudging me in the shoulder.
âItâs hard to be really handsome.â Wonho stated before laughing. They are having fun with their conversation when Kihyun harshly slam the can on the table. Heâs been grumpy the whole time but this no longer surprise everyone since Kihyunâs reaction over things is always different from the rest. He has always been the mother of the group, in the sense of nagging about everything, think he is the only one who is rational. Well there are times that he really is the most rational. Â
âThatâs my point Changkyun-ah, havenât you realized it by now? Y/n likes you a lot, for the longest time now and what did you do? Youâve taken her for granted.â He said raising his voice, obviously mad as he finally voiced out his frustration and here I am, I canât even answer back. I felt guilty and stupid enough.
âKihyun-ah stop acting like a girl, just drink already. It was our idea Changkyun was just dragged with us.â Wonho said rubbing Kihyunâs back trying to calm him.
âYes hyung, yes on Monday I will go to y/n and explain everything to her, Iâll take all the blame. Please donât kill the fun now.â Jooheon said while making cute faces trying to make Kihyun laugh.
âTsk, you two! Remember what Iâve told you, you will both regret this, I know right now you wonât understand, I just hope you wonât taste your own medicine.â Kihyun said slapping Jooheonâs face away while Wonho laugh loudly.
âHA! As if I would ever fall in love. There are so many girls out there lining up for me.â He added finishing the content of his can. Â
      Sunday was torture, itâs the longest Sunday I ever had. I finally texted y/n that I was really sorry and told her I would buy her whatever desserts she likes. I even texted her that I would go to the amusement park with her but she didnât reply any of it. She wonât answer my calls as well. As much as I hate to admit it, it feels a little weird not receiving lots of messages from her. Or was I just so used always getting flooded with messages and whatever from her. My phone feels a little lonely and boring since itâs so silent. Itâs already past dinner yet I still have full battery, my phone battery doesnât usually last this long because of receiving lots of notifications from her. From random text, chat and just what so ever.  I remember her sending me pictures of cute cats she wants to pet but obliviously canât since sheâs allergic to it. And also her sending me pictures of cactus, saying she wanted to pet it since she doesnât need to water it every day. Y/n seriously needs to grow up. I suddenly question what I was doing realizing, Iâm scrolling up her chatbox.
      Monday morning, I woke up extra early so I could go to her house and pick her up for school. Iâm sure she will play sulky for a moment but will surely talk to me after few minutes. Especially now I prepared bribery for her, I bought her favorite strawberry milkshake. Well Iâm not sure if she likes having it early in the morning, but she usually likes everything that I gave her. As what Iâve remembered I usually give her snacks, since she likes eating a lot and I just honestly donât know what else does she like aside from food.  I didnât text her that Iâll be picking her up early, Iâm thinking of just waiting for her to come out so we could go to school together. But itâs almost 8am and she ainât around yet, I was about to walk in when I saw her brother, he greeted me good morning with a confused tone. âI thought, y/n informed you to just meet in school since she had a sleep over at  Eun Haeâs (ur bffâs name) place since they have this morning activity with their groupmates.â Her brother stated that got me confused to, I donât remember her saying any of that. âAww, I didnât know that was today, I might just have missed the dates. Thanks Hyung.â I just ended up saying before bidding him goodbye.
      The entire day at school feels a little unusual, I canât find y/n in the place she usually stay or walk by. She used to always visit and stay in the bench where I and my friends stay, I didnât see her at the cafeteria today as well. I wonder if she had eaten her lunch. âLooking for someone?â Wonho laughed while nudging me as he placed his food on the table. âYeah, it feels new not seeing y/n around.â Jooheon seconded with a fake pout. âYou think, sheâs really serious about giving up on Changkyun this time?â Minhyuk asked in wonder. That also got me wondering if sheâs really going to give up for real this time. I donât know why but I felt a pang of pain in my chest hearing that, it felt empty. I know itâs really wrong and selfish but I wish she wonât seriously give up on me yet. Feeling slightly threatened with the possibilities, I texted her again. A long and sincere one.  Telling her how sorry I was and I really wanted to talk to her personally. It was around 3pm, in the middle of my last class when I finally got a reply from her. She agreed to just talk on our way home, and hell yeah itâs one of the new feelings Iâve been having lately, Iâm nervous to see her, Iâve been contemplating what will I say to her.  Y/n what have I done and what should I do?  Y/nâs POV
      You felt really sick the entire weekend, crying over and telling Eunhae about everything that happened. Eunhae was so mad about everyone and in the midst of all that happened she didnât say much, she was just there and listened to you all the way. You are really thankful you have your only best friend, if not you have no idea how you will be able to act as if nothing happened at home. Your family is really close to each other and talking about your feelings for Changkyun is a normal topic at home and of course your mom will openly talk about it to Changkyunâs mom. Thatâs how twisted everything is, and this time you donât want anything of that. You felt really bad already and as much as possible you donât want anyone to know about it, specially both of your families. Â
      You were having stages of grief over your lost love. That Saturday night you were so angry and mad at Changkyun, you seriously want to slap him and his friends. How dare they made fun of you. But later on, youâre a crying mess, realizing your worth in Changkyunâs heart. By this time you are really sure that he doesnât really feel anything for you, because if he does he will never toy with you, he will never toy with your feelings. He will never let his friends make fun of you. Youâre used to him being mean and cold to you, that hurts a lot but that is somewhat better. At least he isnât lying, at least he wasnât leading you on. But this time itâs different, itâs the first time he toyed with your feelings like this, you were so happy and excited to just let your heart break. Changkyun is really your first love and also your first heart break.
      You promised to yourself before that you will never give up on him. You promised to yourself before that you will be with him and fight for him as long as he doesnât have anyone yet. But now you realized how pathetic that promise was. You realized itâs not Changkyunâs fault alone, itâs yours as well. Youâve been forcing your feelings for him, youâve been fooling yourself that there is a possibility of you and him. You live in your own bubble, pretending you donât know his feelings, denying the fact that he doesnât really liked you from the start. You always make his small gesture matter, making it a big deal to feed your own satisfaction when in fact it doesnât really meant anything. Now youâre not just crying because he toyed with your feelings, now youâre also crying because you finally accepted the reality that nothing is really left for you and him. Itâs so painful that itâs hard to breathe and cry at the same time. Words are not even enough to express the pain you are feeling right now. You are torn between missing him and the imagination of him missing you as well, but you know itâs not the real thing. Plus remembering you words at the restaurant, your pride wonât allow you to make your words into nothing.  Yes, you admit that you can really be bratty and childish at times, prideful and unforgiving as well. Changkyun knew that very well, but still he decided to hurt you that way.
      â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â        itâs not the first time youâve said that youâre giving up on him. But this time youâre so determined to stick to your words, youâre so hurt and tired to go after a love only you wants in the very first place.
      Monday as much as you donât want to go to school, you donât have a choice. Itâs better to be busy at school than to mourn at your best friendâs house. You purposely made yourself really busy, volunteering to do tasks thatâs not even yours. It may sound that you are avoiding him but yeah itâs really true, you donât want to see him. Seeing him might change the decision you made over night , and youâre still so hurt to see him as well. You read his text, saying sorry as if what he did was nothing serious. He even offered to buy you anything or go with you anywhere, if it was some other time you would feel really happy about it, but this time you felt really annoyed reading it. Youâre not in the mood to entertain butterfly in your stomach.  Changkyun can really be stupid at times.
      It was 2:30 in the afternoon, it was your break and you made used of it to just buy snacks you can eat on the way to the auditorium. And thatâs the time you saw Changkyunâs bestfriend Jooheon walking his way towards you.  He called your attention and jogged to your place as he noticed you walking away from him. âY/n waitâ He panted while holding your wrist. âWhat do you want Jooheon?â You asked directly , sounding pissed.  âY/n Iâm really sorry okay? It was mine and Wonho hyungâs fault. Changkyun really doesnât have any idea that we would be there. Y/n please.â Jooheon pleaded naturally like its no big deal. âDid Changkyun asked you to do this?â You asked  and Jooheon instantly deny it and started explaining everything that happened during that time. Saying it was his and Wonhoâs idea, he was the one holding Changkyunâs phone, saying he was the one who insisted the bet. Saying Changkyun was just forced to go along to the idea of testing me.
      Hearing about him wanting to test your feelings really hurt you. Was your effort not enough? Was the way youâre expressing your feelings not enough? You are a woman too, You wished to experience someone who will sincerely like you and go after you. Someone that would make your heart flutter over trivial stuffs such as text, flowers, effort and time. But you have given up all of that because of Changkyun, because you know he will never do that for you. Â
       3pm, you received another text from him, he was apologizing again and asking you if you could talk. âFine, letâs talk.â  You texted him back as you wipe your tears walking your way to the auditorium.
 4:30pm the talk in the auditorium was over already, you didnât even know what the hell they are talking about inside. You were so busy contemplating your emotions , your mind is flying somewhere. Thinking of possible scenarios how to make Changkyun regret for what he did, youâre thinking of how to get back at him and at least hurt him the way he has hurted you or at least make him a little sad as well, itâs not fair that itâs only you whoâs suffering. You took a deep breath, counting 1-10 to composure yourself and act as cold as possible as you walk going to the car park.  You saw him standing there, his back leaning on the door frame of his car. Damn it, here goes your heart getting excited in an appropriate time again. You stand there and tried to calm yourself , remembering the things that hurts you, thinking the guy you hurt you , the guy who toy with your feelings is just there standing in front of you. And as if in cue, Changkyun turned to your direction and saw you. Not unlike his usual self, he doesnât look as confident as he used to be, he looked anxious, well this is new. Reminds you of what happened, now it starts clouding in your chest, its heavy and suffocating. You got inside the car without greeting him anyway.  âYou wanna go somewhereâŚ.I mean is there a place you wanted to go so we could talk?â  Changkyun carefully asked while turning the engine on. âNo, letâs just talk here.â You stated as cold as possible, you can feel how tensed he was as he turned the engine off and sit up properly after letting out a deep breath, how the shortest time you are together this afternoon you canât count already how many deep breath and sighs coming from him. âYou can start reciting your lies now, so we could finish this talk early.â You said feeling proud of yourself as you voice didnât crack.  You saw him sighed and turned to face you. âLook Y/n, I know youâre still so mad or even hated me right now but still I want to tell you Iâm really sorry for what happened. I felt so bad about it too, I hated myself for making it happen too. But please hear me out.â You sighed hearing him, fisting your palm trying your best to control your emotions, trying your best to stop the tears from spilling from your eyes. âIt may sound that Iâm just justifying myself but I donât really have any idea that theyâre going to be there. I really had the intention to be there with you. They told me that weâre just going to make you wait a little, I agreed because they keep on teasing me and I was a little curious too, I know that was stupid. But as I was thinking, you wonât notice it anyway since you were so busy chatting with the waiter friend of yours, I thought it wouldnât matter much as well. Just enough for them to go away, but everything just went out of hand.â He paused looking at you, trying to wait for your response but you decided to stay silent and not say anything. âYou have all the right to hate me for making you wait that long. And about what you said that night, Y/n I didnât do it because I hated you. I may not like it when people and our family go before me and pushed me to be with you and reciprocate your feelings but I never hated you for that. It may be really easy for you to express how you feel for me but that does not work for me Y/n. You know Iâm not as expressive as you are, Iâm not as sociable as you are, I enjoy my peace and privacy. I just simply didnât like it, thatâs why I easily get annoyed and frustrated every time they tease me with you. Maybe thatâs the reason why I wasnât able to stop them from betting that night. I know itâs stupid, but I didnât mean to hurt you that night.â He said, brushing his fingers in his hair in frustration. This time you were unable to stop your tears from streaming, everything just came back to your mind as if everything happened at the moment, youâre no longer mad , just hurt about the reality that heâs talking about. Â
âI know, Jooheon told me everything already.â You started with your head low not even giving him a look. âI donât know what more about my feelings you wanted to test more. Are my efforts not enough? I donât know why Iâm getting so worked up over it, itâs just waiting. Changkyun I can wait for you for how long, Iâve waited for you for the longest time already. How much more just 5pm to 10pm, that should be nothing. Changkyun I really like you, No, I really love you, did you think thatâs really easy for me to say? Iâm hesitating as well, Iâm hesitating every time I get rejected because of your cold treatment and constantly pushing me away. Did you think I donât get nervous all the time Iâm with you, especially when your friends are around? Itâs the time where youâre colder and meaner than usual btw. But did you heard me complained about that, did I hated you for that? Changkyun I didnât because I wanted this in the first place. I canât even hate you after what you did that night. You know whatâs hurting me more this time? Giving up the feelings I had for you for a very long time. My feelings are becoming clearer Iâm falling really hard for you and this onesided love is getting a little toxic in my heart.â You closed your eyes fervently, taking a deep breath afraid of what he might say. You heard him sigh once more unable to collect his words. âIâm sorry, I didnât know, I â I donât know what to say Y/n.â Was the only words he came up to, it hurts but you actually felt lighter than yesterday. Confessing him everything youâre bottling up to, actually made it a little better. âItâs okay, I doesnât matter anymore. Itâll be fine, Itâll forget about it in few days. I also wanted to tell you without sounding awkward, It might be childish but Changkyun you were my first love, Iâll stop there Iâve confessed too much already.â You faked a laugh before continuing.  â Just give me due time and Iâll be back being that annoying little girl who follows you and your brother around when we were kids.â You smiled sincerely thinking about the old times, as you gather all your force to open the door. âWhere are you going?â He asked holding your wrist. âI promised Eunhae, Iâll go home with her.â The last thing you said before stepping out of his car. A/N: WAAAAAHHHH I donât know what going on there mwahhaahah @_@  Forgive me for I just write what ever that comes to my mind. I didnât review and reread this btw , so forgive me as well for the lapses. Huhuhu Iâd love to hear from you guys. <3 Â
10pm
10pm pairing: im changkyun x reader words: 3090 genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah warnings: none rate: g summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life. A/N : I donât really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3 Cramps :Â http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548
Friday evening, 8pm and you canât wait for it to be Saturday already. You know you love weekdays a lot because , well more time with Changkyun. Your oh so loving boyfriend that only exist in your dreams. Sad life. You like Changkyun a lot ever since you were kids and everyone knows it. Your Parents knows it, Changkyunâs Parents and family knows it. Your neighbors knows it and the whole school knows it. Everybody ships you and Changkyun even the waiter and waitresses from the restaurants and cafĂŠ nearby ships you both.
Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or itâs none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesnât like you of course but itâs a waste of time to talk about them.
Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesnât like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time youâve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didnât intended to be.
You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesnât work, youâll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. Thatâs why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think youâre almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay⌠that was a lie, itâs you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isnât it surprising ?? Isnât it amazing ?? And thatâs is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.
2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You canât wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you canât help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. Itâs a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. Youâve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didnât like it , because he just donât. But this time youâve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. Youâve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.
Finally itâs 4pm and youâve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you donât usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him âSee yah later. J â you settled with that because you donât want to annoy him. Â It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your âFirst Dinner Dateâ. Supporting isnât he?? He is the best brother by the way.
Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. âHe must be blind if he doesnât find you really beautiful tonight.â He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. Youâve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.
5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. âNo worries, take your time.â You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. âTake care on your way.â You sneak sending him another text which he didnât replied. He must be driving already. 6:00 Â the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, youâre not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering whatâs taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad. Â You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but itâs a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time heâs giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up. Â You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didnât forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didnât imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.
Changkyunâs POV 4:40 I left the house. Iâm not really excited of what Iâm just curious , I guess. I donât even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So Iâll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no. Â 5:00 I arrived at the restaurant, Â your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownuâs car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess. Â I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasnât expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonhoâs idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what Iâm thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I donât want to be engage in your oh so social life. I donât want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.
That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheonâs idea to make you wait a little. Theyâll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didnât care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesnât have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you wonât last and hour too. Thatâs too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that Iâll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You donât seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. âTake care on your way.â You texted, Iâd be a liar if I say I didnât feel a little bad about what Iâm doing but I canât say no anymore. Itâs like waving the white flag. 6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing. 7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. Iâve read another message from you, I didnât know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. Iâm so confused I donât know what Iâm feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I donât feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.
8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought youâd see us , just to realized Shownuâs car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, Iâd  wished youâd just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownuâs car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you. 9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I canât explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. âGame overâ Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying âI told you, youâll regret it.â And I was there paralyzed unable to move.
~End of Changkyunâs POV~
It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home. Â You didnât believe at first, you canât help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him. You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just donât know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.
âYouâre a little late.â You asked smiling while wiping your tears.
âDid you had fun with your little game?â You asked once more.
âIâm sorryâ was the only thing you heard from him, he canât even look straight at you.
You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and youâve made everything is so clear to you now.
âNo, Itâs okay.. Iâm sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.â You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.
â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â  You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist. âDonât worry I wonât tell anyone, our families wonât know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you donât like it.â You said as you handed him the small box youâve been dying to give him. 10:00pm  You gave up your first love. 10:00pm  He lost you for good.  A/N: T_T
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