â warning : explicit language, mentions of alcoholÂ
â summary : it seems like everyone has their own guardian angel, everyone but you because youâve given up on Jesus the moment you come down to Lee Minhoâs level and shake hands with the Devil.
one.
Your dad is definitely not gonna approve of you hanging by the bar alone after midnight.Â
It all happened too fast, and you donât even know where youâre going next. After a call from your manager, which you almost fell asleep as he rambled about boring paperwork, until he dropped the bomb. He said he was sorry for what heâs gonna say next and turned out the label wanted to cut you loose. The entire universe was completely shattered right in front of your eyes. You were utterly speechless when the line went dead so long story short, you packed your bag and ran away.Â
Like a coward.Â
You stare blankly at the half-empty glass of Martini in your hand before chuckling lowly. Because life is a little son of a bitch, whoâs born with the power to pull on everyoneâs strings as if people are a bunch of puppets for whatever gods up there to entertain themselves. Getting signed into a music production company right after your graduation swept your life over with joy. Your parents were⊠overwhelmed to say the least but they still wanted you to move to Seoul. Two years later, your life once again was flipped upside down because of a single phone call. They didnât even bother to call you in and meet face-to-face.Â
âCheers to this motherfucker.â You almost laugh at your own miserable state but suppress it and down the whole glass in one go. âAnother one.â You tell the barista absently and he just sighs before starting to mix your drink.Â
âTough times ?â He leans over the counter and slides your drink across the wooden surface.Â
You gratefully take the glass, words slurred between hiccups. âYou have no fucking idea.â Your eyes travel down from his defined features gleaming under the neon light to the name tag hanging off his white dress shirt. It reads âKim Woojinâ. You shake your head to lure the weariness away while your right hand reaching inside your pocket to pull out some cash.Â
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Hi! I noticed your requests were open and I was hoping you could write a minho x female!reader angst with a happy ending? Maybe a break up au where they get back together years later? Sorry if itâs too specific
â recommence.
word count: 6.3k
pairing: lee minho (skz) x gender neutral reader
warning(s): food mentions, swearing, break-ups, sadness that comes with said break-ups (itâs a happy ending though dw!! đ„Č)
genre: angst, fluff, non-idol au, exes-to-lovers au
notes: i came across this poem on pinterest while writing this, and i wanted to share it since i feel like it fits this fic pretty well đ âdo you remember / where we first met? / do you wonder / if weâd make it to the end? / would we still / be our first choice? / i guess this is when / we make our stand / and choose / each other againâ â the summer happy
summary: fate mustâve hated you when it brought you and minho apart in a devastating break-up. but fate also works in mysterious ways, and he finds his way back into your life a few years later.
a/n: donât worry, this isnât too specific at all!! i hope this is close to what you had in mind and iâm so sorry for the wait!! also i just realised i wrote for a gender neutral reader instead of a female reader like you requested but i hope itâs still okay!!! ugh i completely missed that part iâm so sorry đđthis took a bit longer to draft and write than i thought but it was really fun to write đ hehe gotta throw in some angst for Flavour đŒthank you for the request and i hope youâre having a good day!! (ÂŽ Ï `âĄ)
When you met Lee Minho for the first time, you became very wary of what the universe had planned for you by making your paths cross.
The two of you met in high school through Felix, who had recently joined the schoolâs dance team and after a few months, wanted you to meet his friends on the team because were apparently âreally coolâ and âyouâll definitely like them, Y/N, trust me!â.
It took one meeting for you to realise that those claims only applied to Hwang Hyunjin, who was a total sweetheart and shared his muffin with you even though at the time the two of you had only known each other for fifteen minutes.
Felix complained about how unfair it was that Hyunjin managed to buy your affection with food in the blink of an eye, but your love language is sharing food with your friends and devouring it together, so sue you.
On the other hand, Lee Minho can go eat a shoe or something because you detested him immediately after he made a snarky comment about the book you brought with you. To be fair, heâs right and that book absolutely sucked, which is precisely why you decided to give it a go because nothing beats good entertainment like a bland, cringey plot where the characters go through little to no development.
Your pride, however, was too big for you to explain that you were reading it ironically. Because what if you actually liked that dumb book? He had no right sticking his nose into your business where it didnât belong, and thatâs what you said to Felix as soon as the two of you left the dance studio to meet up with Chan and Seungmin.
âAw, he was just joking,â Felix explains with a sheepish grin. âI was slightly intimidated by him too when we first met, but then I quickly realised it was just his way of showing affection and interest in people.â
âAffection and interest?â you repeat in disbelief. âThatâs some way of showing it.â
âWell, heâs a cat dad, so...maybe he took a few pages out of his catsâ books. Haha, get it? Book? Because you were just talking about books with him?â
You level your best friend an unimpressed state. âYou want a Comedian of the Year award, or something?â
Felix laughs as he slings an arm over your shoulder. âYouâll see. Minhoâs really cool once you start talking to him more, and youâll warm up to him in no time!â
Yeah, that didnât happen. At least, not for a while. Even since you had the pleasure of meeting Lee Minho, it seemed as though he made his lifeâs goal annoying you indefinitely.
Heâd come up from behind you to ruffle your hair, completely messing it up, as you were busy grabbing stuff from your locker; when you were studying in the library heâd plop down into the seat opposite yours and pester you until he was sure you were distracted; when you visited Felix at practice heâd chase you around to pull you into a hug knowing he was sweaty from all the dancing. The list can go on and on.
Heâd start random fights with you whenever he occasionally joined you and Felix for lunchâwhat type of chocolate is superior (milk chocolate gets way too much crap); whether a shark or a bear would win in a fight; whether the straw has one hole or twoâliterally anything and everything. But perhaps the most aggravating aspect of it was that he always had a comeback, and it seemed like youâd never win an argument with him, which your pride simply would not allow.
Every friend of yours remarked that the two of you bickered like an old married couple which would earn them a punch on the arm. But maybe fate was indeed listening, because whether you liked to admit it or not (you didnât), you found yourself secretly looking forward to those little moments you shared with Minho, even if they consisted of sarcastic comments ninety-nine percent of the time.
âWhereâs you-know-who?â Is the first thing you ask Seungmin when you walk up to him. After his first class (which you knew he had with Minho), heâd wait for you outside your classroom so you could walk to History together.
âHe called in sick today,â your friend says before giving you a pointed look. âWhy? And since when did you care about Minho?â he adds suspiciously.
âI donât,â you say with an air of (false) nonchalance, hoping it was enough to fool Seungmin. âJust wondering if he was going to bother me yet again in Maths.â
âSure...â Seungmin says sarcastically, dragging out the syllable, because of-fucking-course heâd see through you. Heâs far too observant for his (or your) own good.
âI donât like what your tone is insinuating.â
Seungmin smiles deviously. âAnd I donât like how you keep lying to yourself when you obviously like him more than you let on.â
âEat a sock, Kim Seungmin.â
Deep down, however, you canât help but feel disappointed over how youâd have to get through two periods of Maths alone without Minho flipping through the book to find the most stupid-looking illustrations, tapping on your shoulder from next to you before pointing at them and saying, âthatâs youâ.
Neither of you ever paid attention in Maths, but it was okay because Minho would always help you with anything you didnât understand (which was pretty much everything) after class.
Eventually, like every classic enemies-to-lovers trope, you realised (much to your horror, but also not really) that you werenât bickering with Minho because you genuinely disliked him, but because you wanted an excuse to keep him in your life. And you had a small hunch that he felt the same way.
That hunch was confirmed when he marched towards you one day in the library and like he usually would, claiming the seat across from you.
âGood afternoon to you too,â you say casually as you turn a page, despite your heartbeat already starting to pick up its pace when you feel his stare on your face. âHow are things?â
âGo out with me?â
You look up from your book and note the serious expression on his face, completely void of any sign that he was joking around.
You think that perhaps nothing is ever meant to be.
Fate, if such a thing existed (at least, you choose to believe it does), can be cruel. Two peopleâor more, you donât judgeâcan be so compatible and so right for each other that it wouldnât make sense for them to be apart. Yet thereâs no guarantee that they are immune to separation, sometimes...things just happen.
Itâs unfortunate how you met the right person at the wrong time.
Ever since that first date with Minho (which was met by a chorus of I told you soâs from your friends) your relationship had been going strong. That is, until the subject of your future plans came up.
Even before you started dating, Minho had been talking about wanting to go to this university across the country that specialised in business and economics. When you were just friends, you supported his decision wholeheartedly, knowing that if anyone deserved that opportunity, it was Minho. You still do, but it was just that...now what?
This question plagued your mind after every date as graduation drew closer and closer. Would you have to break up? Have your relationship be long-distance? Ditch all your plans at your dream university which was just a twenty-minute bus ride away from your apartment building?
The night before graduation at the convenience store where youâd have your weekly instant ramen run, you finally brought it up, and the two of you agreed (quite begrudgingly, knowing the pain that youâd both be in after) that such a conversation was inevitable.
You both decided to try maintaining the relationship, not wanting to lose the other so soon. The day he left for university was perhaps one of the saddest days youâve ever had. You did all you could to hold back your tears, and you like to think that you did a pretty good job at it until it really was time for him to go through the departure gates.
âDonât cry, silly,â Minho coos, his hand gently smoothing down your hair as he speaks. Chan, Felix and Seungmin are standing a few feet away after exchanging final goodbyes with Minho, likely to give the two of you some privacy. âIâll be back for winter break before you know it.â
You blink rapidly in an effort to rid the tears. âIâm not crying,â you lie through your teeth. âI just...I donât know how Iâm gonna adjust to not seeing you for months from seeing you almost every day...â
âIâll call, text and FaceTime you so much that youâll probably sick of me,â Minho jokes. Heâs trying to lighten the mood and cheer you up, but his words only make you even more upset.
You frown, tears pushing past your eyes to roll down your cheeks in rivulets. âPlease donât say that when youâre flying across the country in less than two hours,â you choke out.
Minho visibly panics, a stark contrast from his usual calm and collected demeanour. âIâm sorry, Iâm sorry,â he says immediately, warm hands hastily swiping away your tears. When you look up, you find that his eyes are glossy too. âIn all seriousness, Iâll never get tired of you. Iâll call as much as I can, okay? Weâll be okay.â
You donât know that, is what you want to say. But youâll probably break down if you actually do, so you keep your mouth shut and nod glumly instead.
Time didnât stop for you when it was finally time for Minho to go through the security gates, and you were forced to watch his silhouette shrink as he walked away, each step creating a deeper pit in your stomach.
You managed to muster up a smile (that likely looked more like a grimace than anything else) and wave when he turned back to find you among the bustling crowds in the terminal before disappearing around the corner. You didnât think it was possible to be this heartbroken, but your heart truly felt like as though someone had reached into your chest and crushed it wholly.
(Felix held you in the backseat of Chanâs car as you sobbed in his arms the entire ride home. You were too busy bawling your eyes to notice the sympathetic looks Chan and Seungminâs gave you through the rear-view mirror from the driver and passenger seat.)
It still hurts to think of what happened in the months after Minhoâs departure. You fought for this relationship and the both of you were desperate to make it work. For the first few months or so, you stayed true to your word and spoke to each other every day, and you couldnât be happier when Minho came back for winter break. That is, until the looming reminder that he would have to leave you again, this time for even longer, dug its roots into the (what you thought was a) solid foundation that was your trust in this relationship and started prying it apart.
It was tough when Minho went back after winter break. There was just so much in the wayâbusy schedules; your own obligations; less time spent talking to the other which then led to even shorter texts and phone calls...You knew this would happen eventually, so you really shouldnât have been that surprised, but there were a huge part of you that wished it didnât.
An even bigger part of you (if that was even possible) didnât want to be the one to put an end to a relationship that brought so much joy and love into your life.
Like they always say, all good things must come to an end.
âDo you think...we should break up?â Minho asks suddenly during one of your (now slightly awkward) phone calls. He sounds unsure, like heâs scared of what your response will be.
Your heart plummets when you finish processing his words. Sure, youâve thought about it since it began feeling like the two of you were staying in this relationship simply for the sake of it, but hearing him say it, to speak it into existence so that it is no longer a thought you can keep to yourself, but a decision the two of you must make together...it hurts. It fucking hurts.
It feels like the end. Like youâre both too tired to keep fighting for each other.
âDo we have to?â you ask hoarsely when you find it in you to finally respond.
Minhoâs end falls silent for a few moments, and you hear some shuffling before he speaks again. âItâs just...I donât know. Are we evenâare we even happy in this relationship anymore?â
âI tried so hard to be,â you whisper. Your chest feels tight, like someoneâs pressing all the air out of you.
âMe too,â comes the equally regretful response. âI think we both did our best...but maybe it just wââ
ââWasnât enough?â
You can practically hear your heartbeat.
âYeah...I guess sometimes there are just things that...we canât control, you know?â
âSo...w-what? This is how it ends?â You almost donât recognise your own voice because it just sounds so, so broken. You donât want him to hear you cry, but tears uncontrollably escape the corner of your eyes, trailing down your temples before disappearing into your pillow and leaving behind two growing dampened spots on either side of your head.
Minhoâs voice comes back a little stuffy, like heâs holding himself back from crying too. âI donât want it to...â he says, and it pains you to admit that youâre already doubting his sincerity in that sentence. Is this hurting him as much as itâs hurting you, or is he just saying this to make you feel that you still mean something to him even when you donât? âBut I donât want us to part on bad terms, I donât want an explosive fight to break out because then we might not even get to stay friends. You know?â
You tried to understand. And looking back at that conversation, he did have a point. At least if you ended things amicably, you could still be friends and spare yourselves and your mutual friends the awkwardness when he comes back during breaks. But at the time, you were so heartbroken that his words went in one ear and out the other, the only thing on your mind was what he said to you at the airport all those months ago.
âIn all seriousness, Iâll never get tired of you. Iâll call as much as I can, okay? Weâll be okay.â
Maybe promises were made to be broken.
âI donât want this to end just yet...Iâm, Iâm still in love with you,â you admit before fully breaking down in sobs.
âAs am I, but I donât want things to get any uglier than they are now,â Minho pleads, sounding equally as hurt. His words donât bring you any reassurance or comfort, and instead you feel a flash of anger because how dare he say that? How dare he claim he still loves you when he was the one who wanted to let go? If given the chance, would he even want to keep fighting for this?
You dread knowing the answer. So you donât voice out any of those thoughts.
âCan we still stay friends after this?â Minho asks quietly. âI know it sounds selfish, but...I still want you in my life...â
You donât want to think. Your head is pounding from both the conversation and from crying so much, feeling like it could split open any moment.
âYeah, sure,â you say, too tired and numb to form a more eloquent response. âJust need some time...I think.â
âYeah,â he echoes awkwardly. âWell...take care, okay? Iâll see you around...â
The way he says the last part so hesitantly crushes you. It sounds so foreign, like heâs already putting distance between the two of you. It hits you that this really is it, that after you both hang up, you will no longer be what you used to. Itâs an unsettling feeling that makes your chest constrict even more until it feels like you canât breathe.
âYou too.â Thereâs so much you want to say, but at the same time the words donât leave you because you donât know where to even start. So you hang up just like that, hand falling limply to your side and your phone carelessly tossed somewhere next to you on the bed.
The tears are drying on your cheek and your eyelids feel heavy and swollen from all the crying. Your head is aching more than it has ever been because you no longer have a conversation with your boyfâex-boyfriendâto distract you from the pain. The physical one, at least.
You donât know how and when sleep finds you. All you know is that before your drift into unconsciousness, all you can think of is whether Minho is feeling the same pain as you are or if he feels nothing but pure relief at the end of this chapter.
(Chan, Felix and Seungmin come over the next night with pizza, ice cream, and a mountain of sugary snacks to pig out on, occasionally pausing your movie marathon to wrap you in hugs as you cry.)
You never called Minho after that night, he didnât seem any more eager to keep in touch either, and so the two of you drifted apart just like that. Like beautiful strangers, perhaps.
âIâm over him,â is what you announce to your three best friends at an impromptu hang-out at Felixâs a few months after the break-up. You just beat all three of them at Mario Kart (what a legend!), and perhaps the triumph coursing through your veins has led you to make this confident declaration.
âThe Aussie brosâ (as you liked to call Chan and Felixâironically they also chose Mario and Luigi as their players, talk about friendship goals) exchange worried glances as Seungmin speaks.
âThatâs great!â he says, eyes crinkling into gentle crescents as he pats your knee encouragingly. âMaybe you can reach out to him when youâre ready, but Iâm happy that you can acknowledge that youâre doing better! Right, guys?â
Felix nods enthusiastically. âTotally! This all mustâve been really hard on you, and weâre happy that youâre both moving on amicably and just...living your best lives!â
You smile, but it falls slightly when you notice Chanâs tightly-knit brows as he stares down at his controller, seemingly lost in thought. âChan?â you ask softly. âIs everything okay?â
The oldest boy snaps out of his daze. âOh, yeah! Iâm fine! Just spaced out, you know? So, uh...who wants to pick the next course?â
Now itâs your turn to frown as you note his eagerness to change the subject. âChan, if this is about Minho, you can tell me. I promise Iâm okay with it.â The firmness in your tone indicates that thereâs no keeping this from you, not if it also concerns you.
Chan sighs and turns to you with an apologetic look. âThe thing is...Minho texted us a few days ago saying that his flight back here is tonight, soâyou know the new carnival by the boardwalk near the beach?â
âYeah?â Where is this going?
âWell, he wants to check it out, and...â he looks to the two younger boys for confirmation, and they nod, silently urging him to continue. âAnd he said you should come if youâre up for it...just to catch up and stuff...â
âOh,â is all you say. It feels like youâve been doused in a bucket of ice water because youâre frozen on the spot, not expecting Minho to suggest such a thing and that (if youâre going) youâd be seeing him so soon, especially when you havenât really spoken to him since you broke up.
Your pride is probably too big for your own good, and youâre determined to prove to your friends that you are an adult! And youâre going to deal with this like one and not freak out!
âUh, yeah! Sure! Why not? Weâre all friends, right? Just five happy buddies hanging out at the carnival!â
Seungmin once told you that you tend to ramble a lot when youâre nervous. You can definitely see it now. A point for Kim Seungmin and none for you.
Felixâs gaze is sympathetic when he speaks. âY/N, itâs okay if you donât want to. We donât want to pressure you into meeting him again if thatâs not what youâre comfortable with at the moment.â Chan and Seungmin quietly voice their agreement.
âNo, no. Itâs fine, guys. I promise! Itâll be fine and weâll all have a great time,â you assure them by trying to sound as convincing as possible. But itâs an unspoken fact that if anything, youâre really just trying to convince yourself.
âWell, if youâre sure, then okay!â Felix chirps brightly to lighten the mood. âHeâs meeting us there so we can pick you up on the way! Now, I think itâs my turn to pick the course...letâs do Rainbow Road!â
Seungmin groans at his choice. âYou just want to see me place last again, donât you?â
âNo, I want to see Chan place last again.â
âHey!â
So the game resumes, and for an hour youâve completely forgotten about the conversation because of all the screaming and shouting and âGod-fucking-dammit, Felix! Stop blue-shelling me!â
When Chan drove you and Seungmin home that night, you told yourself again and again that youâve gotten over Minho. Completely. Most certainly. Undoubtedly. Yep, totally over him! Look at you go!
But that all changed as soon as you got into bed, and your head wonât stop replaying the conversation that took place earlier.
Were you truly ready to see your ex (who you may or may not are still in love with) again? What if he told you all that heâs seeing someone new? Would you be able to take the news well, at least in front of your friends, and hold back any form of negative emotions until youâre back in the safety of your apartment?
In the middle of the night, a dream so tangible, so vivid and so real jolted you awake from your slumber. You reached up to touch your cheeks to find them wet with tears. The ache in your chest felt familiar, bringing you back to that night when your heart was shattered by the boy you love.
And itâs then when you decided that despite everything youâve been telling your friends and yourself, that no, youâre not ready at all. Because if you canât even handle seeing him in a dream, how can you expect yourself to react differently seeing him in person?
(At three in the morning, your shaky fingers texted the group chat you shared with your three friends that you werenât going to make it tomorrow because you werenât feeling well, before tossing your phone aside and rolling over to let sleep overtake you once again. They knew it was a lie, but theyâd understand.)
You think that fate is like your 5-year-old cousin who you occasionally babysitâthey both donât fucking listen. But at least little Wooyoung can be adorable sometimes. Fate? Yeah, not so much.
Whoever is controlling this stimulation that people like to call âlifeâ is probably looking down at you gleefully with a bucket of popcorn, eagerly waiting for everything to unfold.
Just as you thought you had gotten over Lee Minho from barely having any form of contact with him, he still somehow finds his way back into your life.
Itâs a few years later, you graduated from university and are working at a regular firm, just living a regular life as a regular person. You havenât seen Minho in years, rejecting your friends every time they invite you to hang out with them when you know heâs going to be there too. You think youâre going to go the rest of your life avoiding anything that has to do with him.
Chan says this isnât really a healthy coping mechanism, but youâre doing fine. Occasionally. When youâre not thinking about him. But as long as you donât see Minho, youâll be okay. Right? Thatâs what you kept telling yourself, and for the most part it seems to be working fine.
Until your manager walks into the office with someone who looks far too familiar right beside her and listening along as your manager blabbers on about God-knows-what.
Immediately, you drop to the ground and crawl under the desk before Minho can see you because what the fuck is he doing at your workplace?
Your coworkers and friends, Ryujin and Seonghwa, who sit across from you, peer down with curious and slightly alarmed expressions.
âY/N? Whatâs wrong?â the latter asks worriedly. âWhy are you down there?â
âI...dropped a pen?â
Ryujin looks over her shoulder before quickly turning back to you. âWell, you better pick that pen up now, because Park is headed right this way with the new guy!â she whisper-yells.
With no other choice, you heave a heavy sigh and get up from your spot on the floor, adjusting your work attire and feigning oblivion to your approaching manager and ex-boyfriend by pretending to type something on your computer.
âGuys,â Park addresses the three of you, and as soon as you look up from your âworkâ, you can see the surprise that flashes across Minhoâs face before he reverts his expression to a neutral one. âThis is Minho, he just transferred here. I expect you all to do your best in making him feel welcome here.â Her usual piercing stare seems to target you specifically, but thatâs likely just from your nervousness and shock towards the whole situation.
Honestly, your mind is still reeling. You canât imagine the chaos that will ensue when you tell Chan, Felix and Seungmin about this. Or did they already know but didnât tell you so you wouldnât freak out?
You and your coworkers nod, and Park turns to march in the opposite direction, muttering something about showing Minho the rest of the office and gesturing with her head for him to follow. You donât spare them another glance, but out of the corner of your eye you see Minho look back at you.
âY/N, do you know the new guy?â Ryujin asks once theyâre out of earshot.
âI was gonna ask that too,â Seonghwa pipes up, having paused his typing to give this conversation his full attention. âHe looked like he recognised you.â
There are too many things going on at this moment. You donât know what it is youâre feelingâshock from seeing him again after so long? Regret for not doing better to keep in touch with him after your break-up? Sadness because someone you were so close to, who might as well be a complete stranger now, is in your life again when you tried so hard to erase all traces of him from it?
Probably all of the above.
âItâs a long story,â you admit finally.
âOoh, I do love stories,â Ryujin says cheekily, leaning across the table eagerly for your elaboration.
You flick her forehead lightly. âMaybe another time,â you say, âletâs just get back to work before Park notices that weâre gossiping and separates us.â
âWhat is this, high school?â Seonghwa grumbles, turning back to his computer begrudgingly, but you all wouldnât put it past your strict manager to do something like that.
Itâs half an hour until your lunch break when youâre in the break room making yourself another cup of coffee, silently rejoicing over getting to eat soon (and maybe telling Ryujin and Seonghwa about how you know Minho), as well as the fact that Minhoâs seat seems to be far away from yours, at least enough that you havenât seen him around your side of the office for the past few hours.
But of course, fate has other plans for you.
âHey.â
You still at sound of his voice. Itâs exactly the same as it was back then, you note. Itâs like nothing has changed. Except itâs the complete opposite.
You force the most natural smile you can muster on your face as you turn to him. Heâs still so pretty, if not even more so, with his sparkly feline-like eyes and sleek dark hair styled impeccably with gel. âOh, hi, Minho.â
He tucks his hand into his pant pockets casually, but his tone betrays the awkward tension between you. âItâs been a while...â
âYeah, it has...â Four years, to be exact.
âAre you doing okay?â Are you?
âUm...yeah, just the usual, you know? What about you? You said you transferred here?â
He nods, eyes trained on your fingers tapping the buttons on the coffee machine before it whirs and begins filling your mug with espresso. âYep. Was working at the branch near my university, but they asked me if I wanted to move back here, and I thought I might as well...Closer to home and all that...â
âRight.â
âSo, um...do you want to get lunch together later? To catch up and stuff.â
âPlease?â Minho pleads. âYou donât have to if you really donât want to, but I...I donât know...I want to talk to you, hear about how youâve been these last few years, all that...â
You donât miss Ryujin and Seonghwa not-so-subtly watching the two of you from their seats, which have an excellent view of where youâre currently standing in the break room.
âUh, okay.â Youâre not sure what compels you to say this. In fact, you really feel like kicking yourself because just a few hours ago you were crouched under your fucking desk to avoid Lee Minho, and now youâre agreeing to have lunch with him.
You donât know what youâre doing. But perhaps that small part of you, the part thatâs sick of all this dodging and avoiding, has finally took charge for once.
Youâre not sure if you like it or hate it.
Over a meal of ramen, Minho updates you on everything thatâs been going on in his life. Apparently, heâs adopted another cat, and he tells you about how it had to move across the country with him. He also talks about the friends he made in university and at the other branch he worked at, and how theyâre planning to visit him here soon.
In return, you find yourself slowly opening up about more details of your life. Minus the part that you think youâre still in love with him, obviously. If anything, you force those feelings down with every bite of food, knowing that the both of you have grown exponentially since your break-up and that you were most likely in love with the past version of Minho, not the one sitting in front of you currently. It wouldnât be fair to jump into a romantic relationship with him again so soon.
As the two of you walk back to your office building, he shyly asks if you can start over as friends. You agree, realising how much you missed him as someone you could talk about anything to, and the smile he gives you after that fills your chest with more warmth than you liked to admit.
Months after Minho reentered into your life, the two of you have gotten much closer. Not as close as when you were dating, but youâve also definitely moved past the point of acquaintances or casual friends.
Heâs over at your place one Friday night to watch The Great British Bake Off with you while stuffing yourselves with Chinese food. You had asked him about his cats, and he assured you that his roommate, Changbin, looks after them when heâs away.
He showed you a photo of his friend, and while heâs not quite your type (and because you still have feelings for a certain someone who should not be named in this household), you have to admit Changbinâs pretty cute with his squishy cheeks, pouty lips and tattooed arms.
Youâre not much of a baker, but you can definitely relate to the mid-life crises the contestants are having because youâre exactly the same when you have deadlines to meet and somehow still have it in you to procrastinate.
The two of you are sitting pretty close to each other on your couch, though there is still a considerable amount of distance between your bodies. But Minhoâs arm, which is casually draped over the couch cushion behind you and hence dangerously close to touching your shoulders, isnât helping at all.
You hate (but do you really?) how your heart still races whenever heâs near you despite after all these years, but you donât dare do anything about it because Minho is probably just trying to mend your friendship with no interest in a romantic relationship.
Many, many episodes later, you donât know what youâre doing anymore (but letâs be real, when do you ever?). All you know is that youâre on the verge of being lulled to sleep from the long day of work, and when you crane your head to see if Minho feels as drowsy as you are, you find him already staring. Your heart stops beating for a second as your eyes meet.
âUh...is there something on my face?â
Minho wants to say âonly beautyâ but ultimately decides against it. âNo, I just want to look at you.â
Despite the heat that crawls up your neck, you manage to reply with, âPack it up, Edward Cullen.â
He chuckles as he leans back against the couch. âI guess Iâm trying to commit everything about you to memory?â
âWeâve been hanging out for months now?â
âCompared to four years of losing all contact, these past few months are practically nothing.â
âPractically nothing?â You bring your hand up to clutch at your heart. âIâm hurt, Minho. Do I mean nothing to you?â
His smile drops as though you just said something incredibly offensive. âNo,â he says seriously. âIn fact, itâs the complete opposite. You mean more to me than you think.â
You blink at him owlishly. What the fuck? âUh...are you okay? Are you feverish? Did I hear you right?â
Minho sighs. âYes, no, and yes. You heard me just fine. Iâm saying that I still love you, and not just in the friend way. Iâm sorry for hurting you so deeply by breaking up with you. Donât think for a moment that I wanted to do it.
âAt the time, I thought it was the best decision for us because we were barely communicating, and I didnât want to end things only when they got ugly. Maybe I didnât show it much on the outside, but I promise you that I was devastated and regretted ever bringing up the subject of breaking up. All of this is to say...I miss you...so fucking much. And I never stopped loving you.â
You donât even realise that youâve been crying until you feel the droplets sliding off your chin and landing into your shirt. You thought that youâd only hear these words from him in your wildest dreams, because surely heâd moved on from your past relationship and wanted to leave it behind.
But Lee Minho is here, in your living room, with The Great British Bake Off playing distantly in the background and takeout left forgotten on your coffee table, confessing to you that he is still in love with you, like how you never stopped loving him.
This is all so much. So much so that you bring your knees up to your chin and curl up into a ball, burying your head in your arms as you cry silently. You donât keep track of how long has passed (ten minutes? Half an hour? One hour?) before Minho speaks again, this time sounding much more vulnerable than youâve ever heard him, save for the night of the break-up.
âI know this is a lot to process, and you donât have to give me an answer immediately, but...can we try again? For real this time.â
You donât have to wait to give him a response. Even though youâre still crying, one of your hands feels around the smooth leather of the couch to find Minhoâs before interlacing your fingers together.
He gives you the space you need as your quiet sobs gradually come to a stop, his thumb brushing gently against the back of your hand as a constant reminder that heâs still there, and he doesnât plan on leaving for as long as you let him stay in your life.
That night, the two of you start over. Itâs almost like reaching for a story you never finished writing, turning over a new page to start fresh.
To hopefully create something even more beautiful.
For once, maybe fate actually listened to your heart.
a/n: and sheâs finally here!! i hope this was somewhat worth the wait and again, iâm so sorry for taking so long to finish this đ„ș i didnât expect to write this much but then more ideas kept coming and i didnât want anything in their relationship to happen too abruptly,,,please do let me know what you think, thank you so much for reading and i hope youâre having a good day!! đ
please do consider leaving feedback whether itâs a reblog, a reply or an ask, it would mean the absolute world to me as feedback really motivates and supports creators đ„ș remember you can always chat with me through my asks and iâm here for you!! đ
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produce x 101Â
svtÂ
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Jesus, itâs been a while, huh? Sorry for the long wait guys!
 Description: Being the new kid isnât easy, especially not when youâre confronted with one of the biggest troublemakers in school. But soon you get to know the real side of him
Other partsÂ
âââââââââââ
âHow did it go?â Andrea asked you through the phone. It was 9pm right now and you were laying in bed talking to her. You had promised her to tell her about the date and here you were, keeping your promise. âIt went really good to be honest. I loved it!â you said smiling to yourself. âWhat did you guys do?â she asked, probably smiling on the other side. âWe went to the bowling center and then we went to the coffee shopâŠafter that he took me to his place to watch a movie.â you answered. You felt yourself smiling at the thought of it.
I was rereading all the chapters for how many times already while waiting for an update, i cried seeing the update today . Huhuhu thank you so much âĄâĄâĄ
Hai ~ Iâm back with Hyungwonâs POV this time, well this could be a side story from Changkyunâs (10pm)
Pairing: Hyungwon/ Somin (OOC)
Summary:Â When Hyunwon fell for the girl he thought that was perfect for him, but discover she was very far from being the perfect girl he imagined her to be.
Soooonnn~Â
You guys can check Changkyunâs story while waiting for Hyungwonâs.Â
ChangkyunÂ
Cramps
10pm IÂ
10pm IIÂ
10pm
pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3090
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
A/N : I donât really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3
Cramps :Â http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548
Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or itâs none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesnât like you of course but itâs a waste of time to talk about them.
Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesnât like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time youâve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didnât intended to be.
You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesnât work, youâll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. Thatâs why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think youâre almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay⊠that was a lie, itâs you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isnât it surprising ?? Isnât it amazing ?? And thatâs is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.
2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You canât wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you canât help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. Itâs a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. Youâve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didnât like it , because he just donât. But this time youâve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. Youâve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.
Finally itâs 4pm and youâve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you donât usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him âSee yah later. J â you settled with that because you donât want to annoy him. Â It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your âFirst Dinner Dateâ. Supporting isnât he?? He is the best brother by the way.
Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. âHe must be blind if he doesnât find you really beautiful tonight.â He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. Youâve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.
5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. âNo worries, take your time.â You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. âTake care on your way.â You sneak sending him another text which he didnât replied. He must be driving already. 6:00 Â the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, youâre not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering whatâs taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad. Â You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but itâs a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time heâs giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up. Â You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didnât forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didnât imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.
Changkyunâs POV
4:40 I left the house. Iâm not really excited of what Iâm just curious , I guess. I donât even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So Iâll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no. Â 5:00 I arrived at the restaurant, Â your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownuâs car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess. Â I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasnât expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonhoâs idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what Iâm thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I donât want to be engage in your oh so social life. I donât want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.
That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheonâs idea to make you wait a little. Theyâll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didnât care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesnât have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you wonât last and hour too. Thatâs too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that Iâll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You donât seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. âTake care on your way.â You texted, Iâd be a liar if I say I didnât feel a little bad about what Iâm doing but I canât say no anymore. Itâs like waving the white flag.
6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing.
7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. Iâve read another message from you, I didnât know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. Iâm so confused I donât know what Iâm feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I donât feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.
8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought youâd see us , just to realized Shownuâs car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, Iâd  wished youâd just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownuâs car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you.
9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I canât explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. âGame overâ Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying âI told you, youâll regret it.â And I was there paralyzed unable to move.
~End of Changkyunâs POV~
It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home. Â You didnât believe at first, you canât help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him.
You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just donât know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.
âYouâre a little late.â You asked smiling while wiping your tears.
âDid you had fun with your little game?â You asked once more.
âIâm sorryâ was the only thing you heard from him, he canât even look straight at you.
You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and youâve made everything is so clear to you now.
âNo, Itâs okay.. Iâm sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.â You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.
â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist.
âDonât worry I wonât tell anyone, our families wonât know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you donât like it.â You said as you handed him the small box youâve been dying to give him.
10:00pm  You gave up your first love.
10:00pm  He lost you for good. Â
A/N: T_T
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pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3,580
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
10PM (Part I)
A/N : Oh haii, so I just happened to make a part II of this , just finished my final exam and now bored waiting for my brother to pick me up from school T_T. Enjoyyy <3
Changkyunâs POV
      11pm, Saturday, Iâm currently at Jooheonâs place together with the guys, everyone were silent for a moment but Minhyuk decided to kill the silence and suggested to have a beer. Jooheon and Wonho cheered and the rest just agreed about it, while for me I think I needed few cans of it. My mind is floating, y/nâs face is still very clear in my head. Right now Iâm contemplating how will I text her, or should I call her. I know it should be the best thing that I should do, but I canât seem to have the courage to do so. This feeling of guilt is just so new to me, Iâve been holding my phone for a while waiting for her to text me how angry she was, how she hates me. I think that would be better than not getting any, it seriously makes me anxious.
âSo Changkyun what are you gonna do about it?â Shownu asked after taking the last gulp from his can before tossing it to the bin. I just shrug taking a sip from my can as well.
âYou know what? Given y/nâs attitude I think she will just sleep her anger away and be after you again the next day.â Minhyuk said while munching his pizza.
âMe too, me too, y/n is sure to be head over heels with you Kkung.â Jooheon seconded nudging me in the shoulder.
âItâs hard to be really handsome.â Wonho stated before laughing. They are having fun with their conversation when Kihyun harshly slam the can on the table. Heâs been grumpy the whole time but this no longer surprise everyone since Kihyunâs reaction over things is always different from the rest. He has always been the mother of the group, in the sense of nagging about everything, think he is the only one who is rational. Well there are times that he really is the most rational. Â
âThatâs my point Changkyun-ah, havenât you realized it by now? Y/n likes you a lot, for the longest time now and what did you do? Youâve taken her for granted.â He said raising his voice, obviously mad as he finally voiced out his frustration and here I am, I canât even answer back. I felt guilty and stupid enough.
âKihyun-ah stop acting like a girl, just drink already. It was our idea Changkyun was just dragged with us.â Wonho said rubbing Kihyunâs back trying to calm him.
âYes hyung, yes on Monday I will go to y/n and explain everything to her, Iâll take all the blame. Please donât kill the fun now.â Jooheon said while making cute faces trying to make Kihyun laugh.
âTsk, you two! Remember what Iâve told you, you will both regret this, I know right now you wonât understand, I just hope you wonât taste your own medicine.â Kihyun said slapping Jooheonâs face away while Wonho laugh loudly.
âHA! As if I would ever fall in love. There are so many girls out there lining up for me.â He added finishing the content of his can. Â
      Sunday was torture, itâs the longest Sunday I ever had. I finally texted y/n that I was really sorry and told her I would buy her whatever desserts she likes. I even texted her that I would go to the amusement park with her but she didnât reply any of it. She wonât answer my calls as well. As much as I hate to admit it, it feels a little weird not receiving lots of messages from her. Or was I just so used always getting flooded with messages and whatever from her. My phone feels a little lonely and boring since itâs so silent. Itâs already past dinner yet I still have full battery, my phone battery doesnât usually last this long because of receiving lots of notifications from her. From random text, chat and just what so ever.  I remember her sending me pictures of cute cats she wants to pet but obliviously canât since sheâs allergic to it. And also her sending me pictures of cactus, saying she wanted to pet it since she doesnât need to water it every day. Y/n seriously needs to grow up. I suddenly question what I was doing realizing, Iâm scrolling up her chatbox.
      Monday morning, I woke up extra early so I could go to her house and pick her up for school. Iâm sure she will play sulky for a moment but will surely talk to me after few minutes. Especially now I prepared bribery for her, I bought her favorite strawberry milkshake. Well Iâm not sure if she likes having it early in the morning, but she usually likes everything that I gave her. As what Iâve remembered I usually give her snacks, since she likes eating a lot and I just honestly donât know what else does she like aside from food.  I didnât text her that Iâll be picking her up early, Iâm thinking of just waiting for her to come out so we could go to school together. But itâs almost 8am and she ainât around yet, I was about to walk in when I saw her brother, he greeted me good morning with a confused tone. âI thought, y/n informed you to just meet in school since she had a sleep over at  Eun Haeâs (ur bffâs name) place since they have this morning activity with their groupmates.â Her brother stated that got me confused to, I donât remember her saying any of that. âAww, I didnât know that was today, I might just have missed the dates. Thanks Hyung.â I just ended up saying before bidding him goodbye.
      The entire day at school feels a little unusual, I canât find y/n in the place she usually stay or walk by. She used to always visit and stay in the bench where I and my friends stay, I didnât see her at the cafeteria today as well. I wonder if she had eaten her lunch. âLooking for someone?â Wonho laughed while nudging me as he placed his food on the table. âYeah, it feels new not seeing y/n around.â Jooheon seconded with a fake pout. âYou think, sheâs really serious about giving up on Changkyun this time?â Minhyuk asked in wonder. That also got me wondering if sheâs really going to give up for real this time. I donât know why but I felt a pang of pain in my chest hearing that, it felt empty. I know itâs really wrong and selfish but I wish she wonât seriously give up on me yet. Feeling slightly threatened with the possibilities, I texted her again. A long and sincere one.  Telling her how sorry I was and I really wanted to talk to her personally. It was around 3pm, in the middle of my last class when I finally got a reply from her. She agreed to just talk on our way home, and hell yeah itâs one of the new feelings Iâve been having lately, Iâm nervous to see her, Iâve been contemplating what will I say to her.  Y/n what have I done and what should I do? Â
Y/nâs POV
      You felt really sick the entire weekend, crying over and telling Eunhae about everything that happened. Eunhae was so mad about everyone and in the midst of all that happened she didnât say much, she was just there and listened to you all the way. You are really thankful you have your only best friend, if not you have no idea how you will be able to act as if nothing happened at home. Your family is really close to each other and talking about your feelings for Changkyun is a normal topic at home and of course your mom will openly talk about it to Changkyunâs mom. Thatâs how twisted everything is, and this time you donât want anything of that. You felt really bad already and as much as possible you donât want anyone to know about it, specially both of your families. Â
      You were having stages of grief over your lost love. That Saturday night you were so angry and mad at Changkyun, you seriously want to slap him and his friends. How dare they made fun of you. But later on, youâre a crying mess, realizing your worth in Changkyunâs heart. By this time you are really sure that he doesnât really feel anything for you, because if he does he will never toy with you, he will never toy with your feelings. He will never let his friends make fun of you. Youâre used to him being mean and cold to you, that hurts a lot but that is somewhat better. At least he isnât lying, at least he wasnât leading you on. But this time itâs different, itâs the first time he toyed with your feelings like this, you were so happy and excited to just let your heart break. Changkyun is really your first love and also your first heart break.
      You promised to yourself before that you will never give up on him. You promised to yourself before that you will be with him and fight for him as long as he doesnât have anyone yet. But now you realized how pathetic that promise was. You realized itâs not Changkyunâs fault alone, itâs yours as well. Youâve been forcing your feelings for him, youâve been fooling yourself that there is a possibility of you and him. You live in your own bubble, pretending you donât know his feelings, denying the fact that he doesnât really liked you from the start. You always make his small gesture matter, making it a big deal to feed your own satisfaction when in fact it doesnât really meant anything. Now youâre not just crying because he toyed with your feelings, now youâre also crying because you finally accepted the reality that nothing is really left for you and him. Itâs so painful that itâs hard to breathe and cry at the same time. Words are not even enough to express the pain you are feeling right now. You are torn between missing him and the imagination of him missing you as well, but you know itâs not the real thing. Plus remembering you words at the restaurant, your pride wonât allow you to make your words into nothing.  Yes, you admit that you can really be bratty and childish at times, prideful and unforgiving as well. Changkyun knew that very well, but still he decided to hurt you that way.
      â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â
      itâs not the first time youâve said that youâre giving up on him. But this time youâre so determined to stick to your words, youâre so hurt and tired to go after a love only you wants in the very first place.
      Monday as much as you donât want to go to school, you donât have a choice. Itâs better to be busy at school than to mourn at your best friendâs house. You purposely made yourself really busy, volunteering to do tasks thatâs not even yours. It may sound that you are avoiding him but yeah itâs really true, you donât want to see him. Seeing him might change the decision you made over night , and youâre still so hurt to see him as well. You read his text, saying sorry as if what he did was nothing serious. He even offered to buy you anything or go with you anywhere, if it was some other time you would feel really happy about it, but this time you felt really annoyed reading it. Youâre not in the mood to entertain butterfly in your stomach.  Changkyun can really be stupid at times.
      It was 2:30 in the afternoon, it was your break and you made used of it to just buy snacks you can eat on the way to the auditorium. And thatâs the time you saw Changkyunâs bestfriend Jooheon walking his way towards you.  He called your attention and jogged to your place as he noticed you walking away from him. âY/n waitâ He panted while holding your wrist. âWhat do you want Jooheon?â You asked directly , sounding pissed.  âY/n Iâm really sorry okay? It was mine and Wonho hyungâs fault. Changkyun really doesnât have any idea that we would be there. Y/n please.â Jooheon pleaded naturally like its no big deal. âDid Changkyun asked you to do this?â You asked  and Jooheon instantly deny it and started explaining everything that happened during that time. Saying it was his and Wonhoâs idea, he was the one holding Changkyunâs phone, saying he was the one who insisted the bet. Saying Changkyun was just forced to go along to the idea of testing me.
      Hearing about him wanting to test your feelings really hurt you. Was your effort not enough? Was the way youâre expressing your feelings not enough? You are a woman too, You wished to experience someone who will sincerely like you and go after you. Someone that would make your heart flutter over trivial stuffs such as text, flowers, effort and time. But you have given up all of that because of Changkyun, because you know he will never do that for you. Â
      3pm, you received another text from him, he was apologizing again and asking you if you could talk. âFine, letâs talk.â  You texted him back as you wipe your tears walking your way to the auditorium.
4:30pm the talk in the auditorium was over already, you didnât even know what the hell they are talking about inside. You were so busy contemplating your emotions , your mind is flying somewhere. Thinking of possible scenarios how to make Changkyun regret for what he did, youâre thinking of how to get back at him and at least hurt him the way he has hurted you or at least make him a little sad as well, itâs not fair that itâs only you whoâs suffering. You took a deep breath, counting 1-10 to composure yourself and act as cold as possible as you walk going to the car park.  You saw him standing there, his back leaning on the door frame of his car. Damn it, here goes your heart getting excited in an appropriate time again. You stand there and tried to calm yourself , remembering the things that hurts you, thinking the guy you hurt you , the guy who toy with your feelings is just there standing in front of you. And as if in cue, Changkyun turned to your direction and saw you. Not unlike his usual self, he doesnât look as confident as he used to be, he looked anxious, well this is new. Reminds you of what happened, now it starts clouding in your chest, its heavy and suffocating. You got inside the car without greeting him anyway.  âYou wanna go somewhereâŠ.I mean is there a place you wanted to go so we could talk?â  Changkyun carefully asked while turning the engine on. âNo, letâs just talk here.â You stated as cold as possible, you can feel how tensed he was as he turned the engine off and sit up properly after letting out a deep breath, how the shortest time you are together this afternoon you canât count already how many deep breath and sighs coming from him. âYou can start reciting your lies now, so we could finish this talk early.â You said feeling proud of yourself as you voice didnât crack.  You saw him sighed and turned to face you. âLook Y/n, I know youâre still so mad or even hated me right now but still I want to tell you Iâm really sorry for what happened. I felt so bad about it too, I hated myself for making it happen too. But please hear me out.â You sighed hearing him, fisting your palm trying your best to control your emotions, trying your best to stop the tears from spilling from your eyes. âIt may sound that Iâm just justifying myself but I donât really have any idea that theyâre going to be there. I really had the intention to be there with you. They told me that weâre just going to make you wait a little, I agreed because they keep on teasing me and I was a little curious too, I know that was stupid. But as I was thinking, you wonât notice it anyway since you were so busy chatting with the waiter friend of yours, I thought it wouldnât matter much as well. Just enough for them to go away, but everything just went out of hand.â He paused looking at you, trying to wait for your response but you decided to stay silent and not say anything. âYou have all the right to hate me for making you wait that long. And about what you said that night, Y/n I didnât do it because I hated you. I may not like it when people and our family go before me and pushed me to be with you and reciprocate your feelings but I never hated you for that. It may be really easy for you to express how you feel for me but that does not work for me Y/n. You know Iâm not as expressive as you are, Iâm not as sociable as you are, I enjoy my peace and privacy. I just simply didnât like it, thatâs why I easily get annoyed and frustrated every time they tease me with you. Maybe thatâs the reason why I wasnât able to stop them from betting that night. I know itâs stupid, but I didnât mean to hurt you that night.â He said, brushing his fingers in his hair in frustration. This time you were unable to stop your tears from streaming, everything just came back to your mind as if everything happened at the moment, youâre no longer mad , just hurt about the reality that heâs talking about. Â
âI know, Jooheon told me everything already.â You started with your head low not even giving him a look. âI donât know what more about my feelings you wanted to test more. Are my efforts not enough? I donât know why Iâm getting so worked up over it, itâs just waiting. Changkyun I can wait for you for how long, Iâve waited for you for the longest time already. How much more just 5pm to 10pm, that should be nothing. Changkyun I really like you, No, I really love you, did you think thatâs really easy for me to say? Iâm hesitating as well, Iâm hesitating every time I get rejected because of your cold treatment and constantly pushing me away. Did you think I donât get nervous all the time Iâm with you, especially when your friends are around? Itâs the time where youâre colder and meaner than usual btw. But did you heard me complained about that, did I hated you for that? Changkyun I didnât because I wanted this in the first place. I canât even hate you after what you did that night. You know whatâs hurting me more this time? Giving up the feelings I had for you for a very long time. My feelings are becoming clearer Iâm falling really hard for you and this onesided love is getting a little toxic in my heart.â You closed your eyes fervently, taking a deep breath afraid of what he might say. You heard him sigh once more unable to collect his words.
âIâm sorry, I didnât know, I â I donât know what to say Y/n.â Was the only words he came up to, it hurts but you actually felt lighter than yesterday. Confessing him everything youâre bottling up to, actually made it a little better.
âItâs okay, I doesnât matter anymore. Itâll be fine, Itâll forget about it in few days. I also wanted to tell you without sounding awkward, It might be childish but Changkyun you were my first love, Iâll stop there Iâve confessed too much already.â You faked a laugh before continuing. Â â Just give me due time and Iâll be back being that annoying little girl who follows you and your brother around when we were kids.â You smiled sincerely thinking about the old times, as you gather all your force to open the door.
âWhere are you going?â He asked holding your wrist.
âI promised Eunhae, Iâll go home with her.â The last thing you said before stepping out of his car.
A/N: WAAAAAHHHH I donât know what going on there mwahhaahah @_@  Forgive me for I just write what ever that comes to my mind. I didnât review and reread this btw , so forgive me as well for the lapses. Huhuhu Iâd love to hear from you guys. <3Â
Â
pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3,580
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
10PM (Part I)
A/N : Oh haii, so I just happened to make a part II of this , just finished my final exam and now bored waiting for my brother to pick me up from school T_T. Enjoyyy <3
Changkyunâs POV
      11pm, Saturday, Iâm currently at Jooheonâs place together with the guys, everyone were silent for a moment but Minhyuk decided to kill the silence and suggested to have a beer. Jooheon and Wonho cheered and the rest just agreed about it, while for me I think I needed few cans of it. My mind is floating, y/nâs face is still very clear in my head. Right now Iâm contemplating how will I text her, or should I call her. I know it should be the best thing that I should do, but I canât seem to have the courage to do so. This feeling of guilt is just so new to me, Iâve been holding my phone for a while waiting for her to text me how angry she was, how she hates me. I think that would be better than not getting any, it seriously makes me anxious.
âSo Changkyun what are you gonna do about it?â Shownu asked after taking the last gulp from his can before tossing it to the bin. I just shrug taking a sip from my can as well.
âYou know what? Given y/nâs attitude I think she will just sleep her anger away and be after you again the next day.â Minhyuk said while munching his pizza.
âMe too, me too, y/n is sure to be head over heels with you Kkung.â Jooheon seconded nudging me in the shoulder.
âItâs hard to be really handsome.â Wonho stated before laughing. They are having fun with their conversation when Kihyun harshly slam the can on the table. Heâs been grumpy the whole time but this no longer surprise everyone since Kihyunâs reaction over things is always different from the rest. He has always been the mother of the group, in the sense of nagging about everything, think he is the only one who is rational. Well there are times that he really is the most rational. Â
âThatâs my point Changkyun-ah, havenât you realized it by now? Y/n likes you a lot, for the longest time now and what did you do? Youâve taken her for granted.â He said raising his voice, obviously mad as he finally voiced out his frustration and here I am, I canât even answer back. I felt guilty and stupid enough.
âKihyun-ah stop acting like a girl, just drink already. It was our idea Changkyun was just dragged with us.â Wonho said rubbing Kihyunâs back trying to calm him.
âYes hyung, yes on Monday I will go to y/n and explain everything to her, Iâll take all the blame. Please donât kill the fun now.â Jooheon said while making cute faces trying to make Kihyun laugh.
âTsk, you two! Remember what Iâve told you, you will both regret this, I know right now you wonât understand, I just hope you wonât taste your own medicine.â Kihyun said slapping Jooheonâs face away while Wonho laugh loudly.
âHA! As if I would ever fall in love. There are so many girls out there lining up for me.â He added finishing the content of his can. Â
      Sunday was torture, itâs the longest Sunday I ever had. I finally texted y/n that I was really sorry and told her I would buy her whatever desserts she likes. I even texted her that I would go to the amusement park with her but she didnât reply any of it. She wonât answer my calls as well. As much as I hate to admit it, it feels a little weird not receiving lots of messages from her. Or was I just so used always getting flooded with messages and whatever from her. My phone feels a little lonely and boring since itâs so silent. Itâs already past dinner yet I still have full battery, my phone battery doesnât usually last this long because of receiving lots of notifications from her. From random text, chat and just what so ever.  I remember her sending me pictures of cute cats she wants to pet but obliviously canât since sheâs allergic to it. And also her sending me pictures of cactus, saying she wanted to pet it since she doesnât need to water it every day. Y/n seriously needs to grow up. I suddenly question what I was doing realizing, Iâm scrolling up her chatbox.
      Monday morning, I woke up extra early so I could go to her house and pick her up for school. Iâm sure she will play sulky for a moment but will surely talk to me after few minutes. Especially now I prepared bribery for her, I bought her favorite strawberry milkshake. Well Iâm not sure if she likes having it early in the morning, but she usually likes everything that I gave her. As what Iâve remembered I usually give her snacks, since she likes eating a lot and I just honestly donât know what else does she like aside from food.  I didnât text her that Iâll be picking her up early, Iâm thinking of just waiting for her to come out so we could go to school together. But itâs almost 8am and she ainât around yet, I was about to walk in when I saw her brother, he greeted me good morning with a confused tone. âI thought, y/n informed you to just meet in school since she had a sleep over at  Eun Haeâs (ur bffâs name) place since they have this morning activity with their groupmates.â Her brother stated that got me confused to, I donât remember her saying any of that. âAww, I didnât know that was today, I might just have missed the dates. Thanks Hyung.â I just ended up saying before bidding him goodbye.
      The entire day at school feels a little unusual, I canât find y/n in the place she usually stay or walk by. She used to always visit and stay in the bench where I and my friends stay, I didnât see her at the cafeteria today as well. I wonder if she had eaten her lunch. âLooking for someone?â Wonho laughed while nudging me as he placed his food on the table. âYeah, it feels new not seeing y/n around.â Jooheon seconded with a fake pout. âYou think, sheâs really serious about giving up on Changkyun this time?â Minhyuk asked in wonder. That also got me wondering if sheâs really going to give up for real this time. I donât know why but I felt a pang of pain in my chest hearing that, it felt empty. I know itâs really wrong and selfish but I wish she wonât seriously give up on me yet. Feeling slightly threatened with the possibilities, I texted her again. A long and sincere one.  Telling her how sorry I was and I really wanted to talk to her personally. It was around 3pm, in the middle of my last class when I finally got a reply from her. She agreed to just talk on our way home, and hell yeah itâs one of the new feelings Iâve been having lately, Iâm nervous to see her, Iâve been contemplating what will I say to her.  Y/n what have I done and what should I do? Â
Y/nâs POV
      You felt really sick the entire weekend, crying over and telling Eunhae about everything that happened. Eunhae was so mad about everyone and in the midst of all that happened she didnât say much, she was just there and listened to you all the way. You are really thankful you have your only best friend, if not you have no idea how you will be able to act as if nothing happened at home. Your family is really close to each other and talking about your feelings for Changkyun is a normal topic at home and of course your mom will openly talk about it to Changkyunâs mom. Thatâs how twisted everything is, and this time you donât want anything of that. You felt really bad already and as much as possible you donât want anyone to know about it, specially both of your families. Â
      You were having stages of grief over your lost love. That Saturday night you were so angry and mad at Changkyun, you seriously want to slap him and his friends. How dare they made fun of you. But later on, youâre a crying mess, realizing your worth in Changkyunâs heart. By this time you are really sure that he doesnât really feel anything for you, because if he does he will never toy with you, he will never toy with your feelings. He will never let his friends make fun of you. Youâre used to him being mean and cold to you, that hurts a lot but that is somewhat better. At least he isnât lying, at least he wasnât leading you on. But this time itâs different, itâs the first time he toyed with your feelings like this, you were so happy and excited to just let your heart break. Changkyun is really your first love and also your first heart break.
      You promised to yourself before that you will never give up on him. You promised to yourself before that you will be with him and fight for him as long as he doesnât have anyone yet. But now you realized how pathetic that promise was. You realized itâs not Changkyunâs fault alone, itâs yours as well. Youâve been forcing your feelings for him, youâve been fooling yourself that there is a possibility of you and him. You live in your own bubble, pretending you donât know his feelings, denying the fact that he doesnât really liked you from the start. You always make his small gesture matter, making it a big deal to feed your own satisfaction when in fact it doesnât really meant anything. Now youâre not just crying because he toyed with your feelings, now youâre also crying because you finally accepted the reality that nothing is really left for you and him. Itâs so painful that itâs hard to breathe and cry at the same time. Words are not even enough to express the pain you are feeling right now. You are torn between missing him and the imagination of him missing you as well, but you know itâs not the real thing. Plus remembering you words at the restaurant, your pride wonât allow you to make your words into nothing.  Yes, you admit that you can really be bratty and childish at times, prideful and unforgiving as well. Changkyun knew that very well, but still he decided to hurt you that way.
      â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â
      itâs not the first time youâve said that youâre giving up on him. But this time youâre so determined to stick to your words, youâre so hurt and tired to go after a love only you wants in the very first place.
      Monday as much as you donât want to go to school, you donât have a choice. Itâs better to be busy at school than to mourn at your best friendâs house. You purposely made yourself really busy, volunteering to do tasks thatâs not even yours. It may sound that you are avoiding him but yeah itâs really true, you donât want to see him. Seeing him might change the decision you made over night , and youâre still so hurt to see him as well. You read his text, saying sorry as if what he did was nothing serious. He even offered to buy you anything or go with you anywhere, if it was some other time you would feel really happy about it, but this time you felt really annoyed reading it. Youâre not in the mood to entertain butterfly in your stomach.  Changkyun can really be stupid at times.
      It was 2:30 in the afternoon, it was your break and you made used of it to just buy snacks you can eat on the way to the auditorium. And thatâs the time you saw Changkyunâs bestfriend Jooheon walking his way towards you.  He called your attention and jogged to your place as he noticed you walking away from him. âY/n waitâ He panted while holding your wrist. âWhat do you want Jooheon?â You asked directly , sounding pissed.  âY/n Iâm really sorry okay? It was mine and Wonho hyungâs fault. Changkyun really doesnât have any idea that we would be there. Y/n please.â Jooheon pleaded naturally like its no big deal. âDid Changkyun asked you to do this?â You asked  and Jooheon instantly deny it and started explaining everything that happened during that time. Saying it was his and Wonhoâs idea, he was the one holding Changkyunâs phone, saying he was the one who insisted the bet. Saying Changkyun was just forced to go along to the idea of testing me.
      Hearing about him wanting to test your feelings really hurt you. Was your effort not enough? Was the way youâre expressing your feelings not enough? You are a woman too, You wished to experience someone who will sincerely like you and go after you. Someone that would make your heart flutter over trivial stuffs such as text, flowers, effort and time. But you have given up all of that because of Changkyun, because you know he will never do that for you. Â
       3pm, you received another text from him, he was apologizing again and asking you if you could talk. âFine, letâs talk.â  You texted him back as you wipe your tears walking your way to the auditorium.
 4:30pm the talk in the auditorium was over already, you didnât even know what the hell they are talking about inside. You were so busy contemplating your emotions , your mind is flying somewhere. Thinking of possible scenarios how to make Changkyun regret for what he did, youâre thinking of how to get back at him and at least hurt him the way he has hurted you or at least make him a little sad as well, itâs not fair that itâs only you whoâs suffering. You took a deep breath, counting 1-10 to composure yourself and act as cold as possible as you walk going to the car park.  You saw him standing there, his back leaning on the door frame of his car. Damn it, here goes your heart getting excited in an appropriate time again. You stand there and tried to calm yourself , remembering the things that hurts you, thinking the guy you hurt you , the guy who toy with your feelings is just there standing in front of you. And as if in cue, Changkyun turned to your direction and saw you. Not unlike his usual self, he doesnât look as confident as he used to be, he looked anxious, well this is new. Reminds you of what happened, now it starts clouding in your chest, its heavy and suffocating. You got inside the car without greeting him anyway.  âYou wanna go somewhereâŠ.I mean is there a place you wanted to go so we could talk?â  Changkyun carefully asked while turning the engine on. âNo, letâs just talk here.â You stated as cold as possible, you can feel how tensed he was as he turned the engine off and sit up properly after letting out a deep breath, how the shortest time you are together this afternoon you canât count already how many deep breath and sighs coming from him. âYou can start reciting your lies now, so we could finish this talk early.â You said feeling proud of yourself as you voice didnât crack.  You saw him sighed and turned to face you. âLook Y/n, I know youâre still so mad or even hated me right now but still I want to tell you Iâm really sorry for what happened. I felt so bad about it too, I hated myself for making it happen too. But please hear me out.â You sighed hearing him, fisting your palm trying your best to control your emotions, trying your best to stop the tears from spilling from your eyes. âIt may sound that Iâm just justifying myself but I donât really have any idea that theyâre going to be there. I really had the intention to be there with you. They told me that weâre just going to make you wait a little, I agreed because they keep on teasing me and I was a little curious too, I know that was stupid. But as I was thinking, you wonât notice it anyway since you were so busy chatting with the waiter friend of yours, I thought it wouldnât matter much as well. Just enough for them to go away, but everything just went out of hand.â He paused looking at you, trying to wait for your response but you decided to stay silent and not say anything. âYou have all the right to hate me for making you wait that long. And about what you said that night, Y/n I didnât do it because I hated you. I may not like it when people and our family go before me and pushed me to be with you and reciprocate your feelings but I never hated you for that. It may be really easy for you to express how you feel for me but that does not work for me Y/n. You know Iâm not as expressive as you are, Iâm not as sociable as you are, I enjoy my peace and privacy. I just simply didnât like it, thatâs why I easily get annoyed and frustrated every time they tease me with you. Maybe thatâs the reason why I wasnât able to stop them from betting that night. I know itâs stupid, but I didnât mean to hurt you that night.â He said, brushing his fingers in his hair in frustration. This time you were unable to stop your tears from streaming, everything just came back to your mind as if everything happened at the moment, youâre no longer mad , just hurt about the reality that heâs talking about. Â
âI know, Jooheon told me everything already.â You started with your head low not even giving him a look. âI donât know what more about my feelings you wanted to test more. Are my efforts not enough? I donât know why Iâm getting so worked up over it, itâs just waiting. Changkyun I can wait for you for how long, Iâve waited for you for the longest time already. How much more just 5pm to 10pm, that should be nothing. Changkyun I really like you, No, I really love you, did you think thatâs really easy for me to say? Iâm hesitating as well, Iâm hesitating every time I get rejected because of your cold treatment and constantly pushing me away. Did you think I donât get nervous all the time Iâm with you, especially when your friends are around? Itâs the time where youâre colder and meaner than usual btw. But did you heard me complained about that, did I hated you for that? Changkyun I didnât because I wanted this in the first place. I canât even hate you after what you did that night. You know whatâs hurting me more this time? Giving up the feelings I had for you for a very long time. My feelings are becoming clearer Iâm falling really hard for you and this onesided love is getting a little toxic in my heart.â You closed your eyes fervently, taking a deep breath afraid of what he might say. You heard him sigh once more unable to collect his words.
âIâm sorry, I didnât know, I â I donât know what to say Y/n.â Was the only words he came up to, it hurts but you actually felt lighter than yesterday. Confessing him everything youâre bottling up to, actually made it a little better.
âItâs okay, I doesnât matter anymore. Itâll be fine, Itâll forget about it in few days. I also wanted to tell you without sounding awkward, It might be childish but Changkyun you were my first love, Iâll stop there Iâve confessed too much already.â You faked a laugh before continuing. Â â Just give me due time and Iâll be back being that annoying little girl who follows you and your brother around when we were kids.â You smiled sincerely thinking about the old times, as you gather all your force to open the door.
âWhere are you going?â He asked holding your wrist.
âI promised Eunhae, Iâll go home with her.â The last thing you said before stepping out of his car.
A/N: WAAAAAHHHH I donât know what going on there mwahhaahah @_@  Forgive me for I just write what ever that comes to my mind. I didnât review and reread this btw , so forgive me as well for the lapses. Huhuhu Iâd love to hear from you guys. <3Â
Â
10pm
pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3090
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
A/N : I donât really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3
Cramps :Â http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548
Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or itâs none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesnât like you of course but itâs a waste of time to talk about them.
Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesnât like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time youâve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didnât intended to be.
You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesnât work, youâll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. Thatâs why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think youâre almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay⊠that was a lie, itâs you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isnât it surprising ?? Isnât it amazing ?? And thatâs is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.
2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You canât wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you canât help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. Itâs a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. Youâve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didnât like it , because he just donât. But this time youâve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. Youâve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.
Finally itâs 4pm and youâve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you donât usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him âSee yah later. J â you settled with that because you donât want to annoy him. Â It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your âFirst Dinner Dateâ. Supporting isnât he?? He is the best brother by the way.
Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. âHe must be blind if he doesnât find you really beautiful tonight.â He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. Youâve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.
5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. âNo worries, take your time.â You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. âTake care on your way.â You sneak sending him another text which he didnât replied. He must be driving already. 6:00 Â the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, youâre not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering whatâs taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad. Â You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but itâs a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time heâs giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up. Â You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didnât forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didnât imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.
Changkyunâs POV
4:40 I left the house. Iâm not really excited of what Iâm just curious , I guess. I donât even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So Iâll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no. Â 5:00 I arrived at the restaurant, Â your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownuâs car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess. Â I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasnât expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonhoâs idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what Iâm thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I donât want to be engage in your oh so social life. I donât want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.
That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheonâs idea to make you wait a little. Theyâll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didnât care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesnât have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you wonât last and hour too. Thatâs too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that Iâll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You donât seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. âTake care on your way.â You texted, Iâd be a liar if I say I didnât feel a little bad about what Iâm doing but I canât say no anymore. Itâs like waving the white flag.
6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing.
7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. Iâve read another message from you, I didnât know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. Iâm so confused I donât know what Iâm feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I donât feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.
8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought youâd see us , just to realized Shownuâs car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, Iâd  wished youâd just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownuâs car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you.
9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I canât explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. âGame overâ Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying âI told you, youâll regret it.â And I was there paralyzed unable to move.
~End of Changkyunâs POV~
It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home. Â You didnât believe at first, you canât help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him.
You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just donât know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.
âYouâre a little late.â You asked smiling while wiping your tears.
âDid you had fun with your little game?â You asked once more.
âIâm sorryâ was the only thing you heard from him, he canât even look straight at you.
You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and youâve made everything is so clear to you now.
âNo, Itâs okay.. Iâm sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.â You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.
â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist.
âDonât worry I wonât tell anyone, our families wonât know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you donât like it.â You said as you handed him the small box youâve been dying to give him.
10:00pm  You gave up your first love.
10:00pm  He lost you for good. Â
A/N: T_T
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10pm
pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3090
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
A/N : I donât really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3
Cramps :Â http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548
Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or itâs none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesnât like you of course but itâs a waste of time to talk about them.
Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesnât like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time youâve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didnât intended to be.
You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesnât work, youâll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. Thatâs why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think youâre almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay⊠that was a lie, itâs you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isnât it surprising ?? Isnât it amazing ?? And thatâs is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.
2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You canât wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you canât help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. Itâs a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. Youâve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didnât like it , because he just donât. But this time youâve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. Youâve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.
Finally itâs 4pm and youâve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you donât usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him âSee yah later. J â you settled with that because you donât want to annoy him. Â It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your âFirst Dinner Dateâ. Supporting isnât he?? He is the best brother by the way.
Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. âHe must be blind if he doesnât find you really beautiful tonight.â He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. Youâve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.
5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. âNo worries, take your time.â You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. âTake care on your way.â You sneak sending him another text which he didnât replied. He must be driving already. 6:00 Â the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, youâre not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering whatâs taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad. Â You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but itâs a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time heâs giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up. Â You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didnât forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didnât imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.
Changkyunâs POV
4:40 I left the house. Iâm not really excited of what Iâm just curious , I guess. I donât even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So Iâll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no. Â 5:00 I arrived at the restaurant, Â your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownuâs car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess. Â I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasnât expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonhoâs idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what Iâm thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I donât want to be engage in your oh so social life. I donât want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.
That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheonâs idea to make you wait a little. Theyâll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didnât care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesnât have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you wonât last and hour too. Thatâs too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that Iâll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You donât seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. âTake care on your way.â You texted, Iâd be a liar if I say I didnât feel a little bad about what Iâm doing but I canât say no anymore. Itâs like waving the white flag.
6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing.
7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. Iâve read another message from you, I didnât know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. Iâm so confused I donât know what Iâm feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I donât feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.
8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought youâd see us , just to realized Shownuâs car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, Iâd  wished youâd just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownuâs car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you.
9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I canât explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. âGame overâ Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying âI told you, youâll regret it.â And I was there paralyzed unable to move.
~End of Changkyunâs POV~
It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home. Â You didnât believe at first, you canât help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him.
You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just donât know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.
âYouâre a little late.â You asked smiling while wiping your tears.
âDid you had fun with your little game?â You asked once more.
âIâm sorryâ was the only thing you heard from him, he canât even look straight at you.
You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and youâve made everything is so clear to you now.
âNo, Itâs okay.. Iâm sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.â You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.
â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist.
âDonât worry I wonât tell anyone, our families wonât know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you donât like it.â You said as you handed him the small box youâve been dying to give him.
10:00pm  You gave up your first love.
10:00pm  He lost you for good. Â
A/N: T_T
10pm
pairing: im changkyun x reader
words: 3090
genre: angst, angst, angst ??? I tried ahahah
warnings: none
rate: g
summary: The moment he realized he had taken you for granted was the moment you walk away from his life.
A/N : I donât really have a proper fic for this but it is somewhat connected to the other oneshots I made. <3
Cramps :Â http://brendzybee.tumblr.com/post/165582218066/cramps-lim-changkyun-word-count-1548
Well you grew up to be a very bubbly and happy girl that talks a lot, talks to everyone , even talks to objects and animals. There are lots of people who likes you because of your happy and light composure, specially the ajummas and the elders, and you love it too. It feels great to be loved by many, you love it when you see people happy because of you. You can see it when they greeted you with a smile  and asks you how is it going with Changkyun and your love story even if they are busy with their own life or itâs none of their business really. People around who knows you and Changkyun for a long time are somewhat entertained with your love team. Some finds you silly , funny and crazy , some also finds you adorable and persistent, there are also people who doesnât like you of course but itâs a waste of time to talk about them.
Aside from you being happy about how you make other people feel and fell for your charm you also somewhat wish and hope for Changkyun to feel the same, but sadly your still far from it. Changkyun doesnât like you, he dislike you a lot and finds you annoying and childish . He is vocal about it , same as how vocal you are about liking him , he is vocal about disliking you. Everyone knows it as well. Changkyun dislikes the attention everyone is giving him because of your nonsense. He dislikes it when strangers know him because of your stories and self-made fairy tales. He dislikes it that both of your parents are close and no matter how he distance himself from you still he find himself getting trapped with you. Yes, trapped is the right word because he is never willing. Tho it hurts you most of the time youâve gotten used to it, a little bit. Even if Changkyun is a meanie and cold towards you most of the time, you know very well that Changkyun is nice because even tho he dislikes you a lot and even tho he was just forced to put up with you, still there are also times that he was caring with you. You know that he was forced by his mom to come and go home from school together with you, tho he hates it there was never a time that he left you alone. He complains and scold you most of the time specially when you are late or being a brat again, but still he waits for you and stay with you. There are really times that he is naturally caring even tho  he didnât intended to be.
You already fell for Changkyun when you were still kids, when he used to be gentler and nicer towards you. You thought it will be gone when you grow up and meet some other guys, but still you like only him. He have broken your heart multiple times , sometimes he is unaware that he is already hurting you emotionally and most of the time he is purposely hurting you to keep you away from him. There are so many times that you considered giving up on him, distancing yourself for a while or shutting down your feelings for him. But sadly it doesnât work, youâll end up missing him right away. Or you melting right away if he acts a little nice or sweet or just a little friendly towards you. Thatâs why in the mids of all the odds , nothing can stop you from falling for him . You are a strong believer that he was for you and you are for him and you think youâre almost getting there. Guess What???? Well, the handsome Changkyun just asked you out for a dinner date. Okay⊠that was a lie, itâs you who asked him out saying you got those reservation from your parents. And guess what again!!  He agreed!!!! What on earth is happening ??? Changkyun just agreed to go on a freaking dinner date with you. Isnât it surprising ?? Isnât it amazing ?? And thatâs is the reason why you are dying waiting for Saturday to come already.
2pm and you are now getting ready , you are about to meet in a dinner date the mad on your dreams. You both agreed to meet at 5pm. You asked him to just meet in the restaurant where you had reservations with, to add extra effect and impact to your ever first dinner date. You canât wait to see him get into the restaurant in his best attire. You always see Changkyun around but still you canât help but wonder what will he be wearing later. Changkyun is always keen and particular in choosing the clothes he wears. Makes him really attractive. You keep on repeating how excited you are and to add up to your excitement. You are planning to confess again this time, in a more sincere way and in a less childish like. You hope this confession would reach Changkyun heart this time or at least move him. Correction guys, You love Changkyun so much , but it never happened that you begged for him to like you back, you just constantly remind him and sometimes bribing him. You laugh wickedly to yourself while staring at the silver chained bracelet that you bought him yesterday. Itâs a really simple chained bracelet with his name engraved on it. Youâve given Changkyun so many gifts before but he didnât like it , because he just donât. But this time youâve think really hard to pick this one, hoping he likes it. Youâve seen him wearing one before and it looks really good on him, made him look really manly and boyish at the same time. 100% boyfriend material.
Finally itâs 4pm and youâve done your major preparation. You prepared extra this time, you exert effort to put on a little make up, you donât usually do, it was a struggle really. You are a sneaker and jeans type of a girl but you settled will doll shoes and a cute yet casual dress this time. You want to look a little lady like today. Trying to show Changkyun that you are not as childish as what he thinks you are. 4:10pm You texted him âSee yah later. J â you settled with that because you donât want to annoy him. Â It was already 4:20 when your brother dropped you off the restaurant. He kissed you good bye and wished you luck on your âFirst Dinner Dateâ. Supporting isnât he?? He is the best brother by the way.
Sanha greeted you right away the moment you got in the restaurant. He was the new part-timer you made friends with few days ago. You liked him a lot and become easily comfortable with him coz hell yeah the guy was as happy and as playful as you. Talk about being talkative too he is that 100%. You asked him how do you look like, how was your make up and dress and he just gave you a thumbs up. âHe must be blind if he doesnât find you really beautiful tonight.â He stated in an awe that made you blush a little that somewhat boosted your confidence. Youâve been nervous since Friday imagining about what will it be like when Changkyun sees you later.
5:30 you got a text from Changkyun that he will be a little late. You smiled at the text , thankful that he really has the intention of coming. âNo worries, take your time.â You texted him back. You are doing your best to be consistent of not being annoying for today. âTake care on your way.â You sneak sending him another text which he didnât replied. He must be driving already. 6:00 Â the restaurant started getting busy, Sanha asked you for how many already if you wanted to eat something else first or just anything. But of course you declined, youâre not hungry yet, you are more nervous and worried than hungry. 6:30 you started getting a little worried, wondering whatâs taking him so long, the place is not that far from home. 7:00 you texted him where is he, asking him if everything was okay, it took him a while to text you back asking for a few minutes more. Your excitement started going down a hint of disappointment started bothering a part of your brain as you watch couples happily chatting and enjoying good food with each other. 7:30 you started to grow impatient and a little hungry and mad. Â You feel like getting up and just leave the place, but thinking how hard it was to get a chance like this. You tried your best to think of happy things but itâs a mix emotion already, your expectation started failing and you grow a little frustrated thinking the time that should have been spent together is now wasted. 8:00 you felt heart broken and betrayed, you could no longer smile at Sanha every time heâs giving you a worried look. You started to feel so small and a little embarrassed, you started noticing other diners giving you the look. You honestly felt so pathetic for being stood up. Â You just acted busy with your phone as your insides shuttered , your mind travelling a thousand miles, wondering maybe you expected too much. Thinking you wont be this hurt if you didnât forget how Changkyun treated you most of the time. Few moments turns to hour of battling with your emotions, you felt like crying how people started vacating their seats and leaving the restaurants. Now you didnât imagine your ideal and favorite place to have you first dinner date to be this lonely and empty. 9:00 your tear drops fell.
Changkyunâs POV
4:40 I left the house. Iâm not really excited of what Iâm just curious , I guess. I donât even know why I agreed to have this little date with you in the first place. So Iâll just settled of you not letting it off if I say no. Â 5:00 I arrived at the restaurant, Â your favorite restaurant. I saw you happily chatting with the waiter, who is just around your age. Which is not something new, you always talk to people wherever you go. You look really pretty in your pastel dress by the way. I was about to enter when Jooheon suddenly pulled me to Shownuâs car. You were so busy chatting with the boy to see me I guess. Â I was so surprised to see the guys, I wasnât expecting them around and as usual they started teasing me about being totally smitten by you which I always strongly deny and about them showing their full support, but before that we have to do some serious test. It was Jooheon and Wonhoâs idea. I just hate it so much when people think ahead of me, as if they already know what will happen , as if they already know what Iâm thinking or in short people deciding for me and you do that all the time. Same as how everyone keep on saying that I will soon fall for you. Family and friends keep pushing me to date you for real and I swore so many times already that it wont happen, we are just not compatible with each other. I donât want to be engage in your oh so social life. I donât want to be involved in your very flowery fairytales. You made people believe in the Changkyun your imaginations has created when you tell them stories.
That was the stupid reason why I went along with Wonho and Jooheonâs idea to make you wait a little. Theyâll just have to see how long you can wait, given they know how impatient and bratty you are. I always act like I didnât care about your feelings in front of my friends, I just want to prove them wrong about their assumptions. I was curious too, I know you very well, you grew up as a princess at home, a princess to your parents and 2 brothers, and even a princess to my parents who doesnât have any daughter. I was curious how long can you wait, I was pretty sure too you wonât last and hour too. Thatâs too long already for someone like you who always get what she wants right away. 5:30 I texted you that Iâll be a little late but I was already there, watching you from a distance. You donât seem to be bother yet, you have your little friend to keep you accompany anyway. The guys continue teasing me being jealous with the waiter guy or them making scenarios and jokes what will happened to me when we start dating for real. That annoyed me a lot while they were having fun. âTake care on your way.â You texted, Iâd be a liar if I say I didnât feel a little bad about what Iâm doing but I canât say no anymore. Itâs like waving the white flag.
6:30 the guys started betting till what time can you wait. Wonho and Jooheon was so into it, while Minhyuk was moderating the bet asking the rest to participate. Hyungwon disinterested as usual and Kihyun was giving everyone a disapproving look. I saw him shaking his head, telling everyone we will regret what we are doing.
7:00 I stared at you as I read what you texted me. I started feeling bad seeing the changes of your expression, the way you pouted your lips and the way you furrow you eyebrows. Iâve read another message from you, I didnât know what to reply anymore. I was staring at my phone until Jooheon took my phone and replied you to wait some more. I punched Jooheon for that, but honestly I felt like its me me who deserves to be punched right now. Iâm so confused I donât know what Iâm feeling. I should be happy right now I was granted my payback for all the things you made me suffer, for all your dramas that I went through. But I donât feel good at all, I felt worst , I hated myself.
8:00 I heard Jooheon, Minhyuk and Wonho getting really excited, as they saw you stand up and was about to leave. But I was surprised when you just stood there for a couple of minute looking at our direction before going back to your seat and acted busy with your phone. I got really nervous, I thought youâd see us , just to realized Shownuâs car is tinted. That time I wished you just left, Iâd  wished youâd just leave. I felt my heart beats really fast when your eyes scanned the parking lot, you starred at Shownuâs car for God knows how long. I felt ashamed, I felt so embarrassed, it felt like I was caught red handed. For the first time, I felt so guilty for being mean to you.
9:00 Your tear drops fell and I felt pain I canât explain as I saw the look in your eyes and the expression of your face. I heard everyone, went silent. âGame overâ Hyungwon said with a sigh while Kihyun giving us the look as if he was saying âI told you, youâll regret it.â And I was there paralyzed unable to move.
~End of Changkyunâs POV~
It was around 8:00 when you received an anonymous text telling you about the bet going on and just asking you to go home. Â You didnât believe at first, you canât help it from poisoning your mind. You wanted to go home and just cry your heart out but you wanted to see Changkyun and hear it straight from him.
You really love Changkyun so much, but you felt nothing but pain right now as you see him walk going to your seat. Part of you wished he would just reason out or lie perhaps but you just donât know anymore which is better, coz all hurt the same. Your teary eyes never left his as he occupied the seat in front of you.
âYouâre a little late.â You asked smiling while wiping your tears.
âDid you had fun with your little game?â You asked once more.
âIâm sorryâ was the only thing you heard from him, he canât even look straight at you.
You tried your best not to cry anymore but your tears just keep on streaming as you heard his answer and youâve made everything is so clear to you now.
âNo, Itâs okay.. Iâm sorry it took me a while to finally understand. I must be really stupid to wait to be hurt like this to understand how you really felt for me.â You stated, you saw him stared at you with confusion and regret in his face.
â Donât worry this will be the last time. Iâll stop fighting for your attention, Iâll stop texting you, Iâll stop going to your profile and getting jealous over other girls you are friendly with, Iâll stop trying making you fall for me. Please help me, and please stay away from me.â Â You pleaded as you collected your things and walk going out the door when he held your wrist.
âDonât worry I wonât tell anyone, our families wonât know about this. And by the way, this was supposed to be yours, you can throw it if you donât like it.â You said as you handed him the small box youâve been dying to give him.
10:00pm  You gave up your first love.
10:00pm  He lost you for good. Â
A/N: T_T