#murca

So I was born in England but have grown up in the US so I’m gonna do five from each...

England

1.  The accent.  Everything sounds better with a British accent.  Don’t @ me.  2.  The literature.  I guess because the weather is sooo bad everyone just stays in and gets better at writing hahahaha?

3.  The countryside.  Nothing beats it.  Feels like home.

4.  The history.  England actually has one!  HAHAHAAHA!  I’m sorry but 300 years of paperwork and genocide is not an actual history, US.  Come back when you’ve endured 3000 years of lunatics and monarchy.  It makes for great reading but terrible living conditions lol...

5.  Tea.  I don’t actually like drinking tea but I like the idea of saying F this in the middle of the day and for the next forty five minutes just eating biscuits and drinking a warm drink and doing fuck all.  What a beautiful idea. 

‘MURCA.

1.  FOOBAW.  Ok I know yesterday I said I hated it cuz the Patriots can just fuck right off IMHO but there’s nothing better than a crisp autumn day at Lambeau Field watching my Packers and hearing the crack of pads and the ball sailing through the air and the crowd cheering.  YES!

2.  Americans.  You’re just all (for the most part) much kinder and open and more approachable than other people.  I like to say the English are like cats, whereas Americans are like dogs.  I mean this with the highest respect.  They’re always up in your face and happy and want to make you happy and I’ve always liked that.

3.  The Weather.  It actually is capable of getting warm here.  Oooo the sunshine.  I hate rain and cold so warm and blue skies is A+

4.  The optimism.  Despite everything, Americans have yet to be traumatized on the psychic level the English have following the collapse of their empire.  Maybe soon America will lose it.  But not yet....