#mumdate

but i... really can’t spend the rest of her life being a full time caregiver even if i wanted to be! im already the person in the household who does most of the chores and takes care of everyone and the animals and. adding a person who is MUCH MORE reliant on me would. kill me i think and i’m not exaggerating.

depending on how her rehabilitation and recovery progresses we’ll see but at the moment it’s not looking. good.

we barely speak. like i last spoke to her years ago. but she talks to my mum all the time and she.

she called me and said "i am here for you. no (deadname) i. am. here. for. you. we are in this together. if you need to call me to cry to scream do it. i will wake up in the dead of night for you."

and bro i cried about all this for the first time. i feel like she's the only one who understands. and shes coming down tomorrow to help me talk to the doctors and nurses and think about putting mum in a long term care home. and i am just...

so grateful to feel like someone is there for me to lean on and depend in i felt like i was going into this alone and would spend the rest of my life in it alone but she gets it

and she's here for me.

idk I'm just really grateful

bcus 1: thank G.d and 2: she gave me something else to focus on, cleaning my apartment so she has somewhere comfortable to sit.

it was nice to finally do that and it wasn't as hard as i thought it would be

it's also a relief to know that my mums friend does know, shes been calling my grandpa, but my mum was worried she didn't know bcus she cant get in contact with her while she's coherent