#mtlwwcnn

In the beginning, there was the Tower working retail at WallWall. The Prisoner joined her, working behind the counter at the nearby McDonald's, and soon thereafter, the universe spiraled, bringing us to where we are today.

Meet The Cast!

@towerworkingretail-official - works at WallWall, a reality-warping retail shop. Her "bee-eff" (bird follower) The Broken sits on her shoulder and aids her in certain tasks.

@stp-minimum-wage-prisoner - works behind the register at McTabby's. Her chains are connected to the floor but it's on a sliding track, so she does have some mobility. Suffered burns in one of The Fires, leaving her with nerve damage.

@stp-the-razor-minimum-wage - the primary, and prior to recently, only operator of The Meat Kitchen of McTabby's. Specializes in making her coworkers and anyone who crosses them burgers and meat fries. Current life goals are figuring out who she is, not being a monster, and three hugs at once.

@minimum-wage-damsel-stp - one of McTabby's cashiers, only recently discovering the horrors that lay within. Once trusted everyone, briefly trusted only one, will she strike a healthy balance? Tune in intermittently to find out.

@stp-minimum-wage-spectre - perhaps the most well-adjusted McTabby's worker, despite being a ghost. Called the cops when her coworker committed a murder in front of her. Threatened to quit when she realized the burgers were made out of people. Truly a beacon of morality.

@stp-minimum-wage-stranger - five whole employees at once! Prone to violence, pacifism, and self-contradiction, there's never a dull moment at the register with these ones.

@minimum-wage-vothunted - the first of the Voices on our roster, but not the first one chronologically, Hunted stays in his lane and does his job, taking the events that occur around him in stride. Truly employee of the month material, but we'll see if this star behavior sticks around by the time McTabby's been open for a month.

@stp-minimum-wage-broken - yup, you heard that right, folks, we've got a duplicate on our hands! Surprisingly grounded for one called Broken, this voice works diligently at the register when he's not sent on grocery runs to WallWall. He's met his duplicate and wasn't even that shaken about it!

@stp-minimum-wage-smitten - He's at Burger King looking for his Burger Queen. What more can I say? A lot, actually! Formerly a cheerful, bombastic register worker, he has been transferred into the McTabby's Meat Kitchen following a burger incident, and is in the process of regaining his color. And did I mention he's bitterly divorced with the fry cook? Stay tuned to find out who his Burger Queen will be! Or even... Burger Queens?

@deconstructed-damsel-at-work - she just wants to make you happy! And as our first representative of the McTabby's Fry Kitchen on this list, her slightly floral scent is sure to brighten your day :)

@minimum-wage-patd - once an Empathetic Heart, Dragon willingly gave up her emotions and sense of touch within days of working the McTabby's Fry Kitchen, and is now a professional assassin. Who knew that access to all of The Long Quiet's memories of how he's been wronged could negatively affect a person's psyche? She's got some extradimensional shenanigans going on, folks!

@stp-frycook-mrthecold - the original proprietor of the McTabby's Fry Kitchen (and Smitty's divorcee), Mr. The Cold doesn't always live up to his name! Though he struggles with self-image issues (like a large majority of minimum wage workers), he feels very strongly about certain topics.

@stp-minimum-wage-contrarian - meet certain topics! The jokester Contrarian used to hang around the McTabby's sowing trouble for the kick of it, but after the manager found out, they were promptly hired as a dubiously paid intern. They have a hand in a lot of the situations that crop up around the McTabby's, and as such, blame themself for a lot of what goes wrong. They are a proud parent of two, somehow - Eggy, the gosling, and Roach Fryer, the sentient, armed, dysfunctional deep fryer home to a swarm of roaches.

@ask-the-dee - the PRECIOUS mantis-like, friend-shaped, helpful, alternate version of Damsel, beloved by the whole Construct and beyond. Her favorite foods are roaches and peas. Splemdiferous!

@stp-minimum-wage-witch - local crazed cat lady with trust issues and a crush on the ghost! She's helpful, she's a manipulative bastard, she's honest, she's just a silly guy, she's a Woman In Total Control of Herself! Also, she's the janitor.

@stp-minimum-wage-opportunist - public enemy #1. Dons the apparel of McTabby's mascot Spoons the cat, unwillingly. Favorite pastimes include waterboarding fellow employees but with trash bags instead of water, and shamelessly manipulating them.

@stp-minimum-cage - she's the McTabby's security system! Commonly found perched on the drink fridge, this head would really like for someone to talk to her and not leave her alone in the dark where the horrors lurk in her mind. What? No, she's fine! Ignore the screaming. She's fine.

@nobladesonlybrawn - Adversary and Eye of the Needle run a secret fight club in the basement of the McTabby's! Don't tell them I told you, shh!

@stp-fightclub-stubborn - fight club frequenter, gambling addict #1, now with extra beans!

@skeptics-journal-log - gruff ex-mafia detective who's taken up a third job at McTabby's, although the specifics are unclear. Register, maybe? His most valuable contribution to the building, however, is his cat, @minimumwage-sherlock.

@stp-the-shifting-manager - our supreme leader! Change herself, overseeing all at the McTabby's.

@stp-minimum-wage-wounded - one-half of the Wild, she is Shifty's assistant manager!

@stp-minimum-wage-wild - the other half of the Wild, she is the building itself, encompassing McTabby's, the fight club, and the liquor store next door!

@ze-drowned-french - The Drowned Grey, but make her French! Currently the sole employee of the Liquor Store, and renovating it into a tavern and gambling ring.

@drowningandburningjobs - Drowned and Burned Grey, regular edition! They are a lifeguard and firefighter, respectively.

@denandbeastgardeningbusiness - they're a very well trusted gardening service, who double as florists!

@stp-maximum-wage-hero - yes, you read that right, our beloved Hero is a MAXIMUM wage worker! At his old job, his manager tried to set his salary to negative one dollar, so it reset to the integer limit, making him a billionaire in one week! He was promptly fired and sent to join the Tower at WallWall.

@the-employed-quiet - Slay The Princess has never been more The Stanley Parable! TLQ, narrated and managed by The Narrator, works at a nearby ominous office building and comes to McTabby's for the occasional lunch break.

@stp-contrarian-student-intern - another duplicate, waiter! This Contrarian works at the same building as TLQ, presumably with the same level of benefits. Yikes.

That's all the people! Fortunately or unfortunately, depending on how you look at it, we have plenty of objects and creatures here, too:

@minimum-jerry-wage (lizard like creature who skitters)

@stp-minimum-wage-freezer-cow (cow in the freezer. liminal)

@stp-minimum-wage-freezer (engaged to the roach fryer)

@stp-minimumwage-mcdongalds-fryer (now with extra weapons)

@stp-minimum-wage-drink-fridge (drink fridge)

@stp-minimum-wage-blade (it would be very hard to slay the Princess and save the world without it)

Okay! Now that all that's over with, time to actually get on with the

Major Events

Bubblepocalypse! Contrarian filled the bathrooms with soap bubbles and got Damsel to join in on it. A tame taste of what is to come.

The Health Inspector appears. Oh no. Actually, Helath Inspector (legally distinct). Fake mustache, clipboard, asking too many questions. Razor really wanted to turn him into a burger but Prisoner wouldn't let her. But then he told Damsel doors are problematic, insinuating she had used something problematic, getting her to tear up, then tried to make the situation better by saying it was the stupid building's fault, not hers, and she started to cry even harder because he called the building stupid, so Prisoner told Razor hey actually kill this man. Damsel didn't see any of the murder though so we told her he left and forged good health inspection papers.

Razor tried to trick Contrarian into asking her to make them a burger. They wisely ran away. Contrarian and Cold were talking in the fry kitchen and Contrarian fully stepped in a puddle of boiling oil. Cold administered first aid, covering Connie in condiments. They're so yaoi.

The helath inspector's husband comes in and tries to investigate helath inspector's disappearance. He tases Connie and Cold, Cold tases him back. He dies off screen.

The roach fryer goes missing. Cold finds it, having grown legs and sentient, in the parking lot. Brings it back in.

Contrarian doesn't go back to work after the policé officer (helath's husband) (legally distinct from police) incident. Damsel goes to find them, and finds them sleeping in the supply closet they live in. They talk briefly, then both fall asleep because it's Very Cozy™.

The FBI shows up.

They come to warn us about escaped convicts who turn places radioactive if left unchecked and masquerade as a "helath inspector" and "policé officer". Don't trust them. We go "okey!" grateful that there are no consequences to our actions.

Razor has been trying to lure Damsel into the kitchen for a while now. But Cage and Prisoner say it would make them happy if she didn't go into the kitchen. But Razor says it would make her happy if she did.

Razor tells Smitten a secret (she has knives for bones) because he is her Good Friend Smitten!

Someone orders burger and dies. Spectre asks if they meant burger and fries. Cold hits them over the head with a fry basket and kills them. Spectre is horrified and calls the police. Cold tells Razor "be ready, the new girl called in a huge meat order." Razor doesn't question it. We never follow up on this.

Damsel has dirty dishes somehow. Smitten carries them into the kitchen. Razor tells him there's a sink in that definitely not suspicious alcove with all the knives in it and ketchup on the floor! Razor turns him into burgers.

Cold comes in and collects Smitten feathers, then goes back into the fry kitchen.

Damsel decides to visit Razor in the kitchen, and Cage convinces her to try the fry kitchen. Witch tasks Connie with distracting Razor. They discover Smitten. Razor asks if they want a Smitten Burger. Cold says "why are you in here to see Razor? She's in charge of the meat kitchen." They go into the meat kitchen. Razor says she's making Smitten Burgers. Damsel says that's very sweet of her. Razor asks if she wants one. Damsel says she wouldn't want to take away from what was meant for Smitten. Witch pops in and tries to convince Damsel to go back to the register. Connie succeeds, telling her they'd make her some fries. Crisis averted. A whole bottle of ketchup is fried. Damsel does not like it. Cold does.

Smitten respawns, upset with Razor. She doesn't understand how that could have offended him, but realizes it did, and offers the pristine blade to him saying he can burger her any time he'd like. He uses it for... not that.

Cold deep fries several bottles of alcohol. The McDonald's is on fire. Prisoner is burned pretty badly. Burned Grey puts out the fire. Contrarian first aids Cold. Yaoi

An anon asks Damsel who her least favorite coworker is, and to answer truthfully or else they will be very sad. Damsel is uncomfortable. Connie tells her to just say it's them! Damsel has a crisis about it (the anon said answer truthfully and that wouldn't be truthful but does she even have a truthful answer?)

Connie gets hired as an unpaid intern. Proceeds to steal from the register and splurge at WallWall (the store Tower works at). Somehow this leads to them getting a proper salary. Sets up a slip n slide in the hallway. Razor rockets down it at mach speeds and cracks her head on the counter, screaming in pain and going unconscious. Connie panics. Witch tries to hold Connie back, thinking this is one of Razor's tricks. Cold tries to help but doesn't really. Razor wakes up and doesn't remember anything. In fact, she's acting not like herself at all - normal.

And that, princesses and avians, is where things absolutely go to shit.

Along one branch, Connie has an absolute crisis over Razor not remembering anything and flees into their supply closet, where Damsel is also having A Time. They cry and hug each other and Connie thinks they're the worst person ever (and is having Stranger flashbacks and thinks they broke Razor and are unforgivable) and Damsel is all STOP THAT YOU'RE WONDERFUL.

Cold, having been unable to calm his Contrarian down, goes back to the fry kitchen and does the rational thing, tearing out his heart and putting it in a bag in the fridge so he doesn't have to deal with emotions.

Prisoner takes Razor to the freezer, because ice pack helps head wound. Contrarian and Damsel visit. Connie thinks it's all their fault and explains that to Razor, who doesn't get why they're guilty about it, that sounds like it would have been her fault unless they made the slide dangerous on purpose, and she has this gut feeling they wouldn't hurt anyone on purpose. She makes a joke that manages to make Connie laugh and it makes her heart warm. Prisoner accidentally talks about the Smitten Burgers while trying to calm the two of them down because now they're both worked up about Razor's state. Damsel asks what that meant. Connie tries to distract. Prisoner says Razor probably couldn't handle that right now, andyouprobablycanteither. Damsel gives her a chance to take it back, and Prisoner instead says "no. I don't think you can handle it. I think I would get halfway through telling you and you would have a breakdown because you realized what it meant. Damsel tells her to stop calling her Dams. Connie runs away. Prisoner storms off. Razor and Damsel hug and Damsel goes and gets a blanket and they fall asleep cuddling together.

Contrarian finds Cold and tries to tell him how horribly everything's going but Cold gives them the cold shoulder, currently being emotionless and all. Connie is further guilted by this.

Cold comes into the freezer and wouldn't you know it, having no heart impedes your health. Very low strength and stamina rn. Drops like four fry boxes before going back.

Connie and Witch talk, and find Cold's heart in the fridge. They put two and two together, and with Witch distracting long enough for Connie to get in close, they and Cold have a passionate discussion before Cold allows them to put their heart back into their chest. They promptly die of blood loss (but they get better).

Opportunist finds Cage has been kidnapped, her body barricaded in a cabinet and her head in a trash bag out the back. She comes to only to find that he's in the mood for blackmail, and proceeds to choke her with the trash bag until she agrees to look the other way when he takes unauthorized breaks from being the mascot. She is horribly traumatized by this, taking up smoking candy cigarettes, hallucinating Opportunist in the dark (the lights are on), and engaging in yuriful behaviors with Spectre, Razor, and Damsel.

Prisoner never got treatment for her burns, and asks Witch to kill her so she can come back healthy again. She does so, and comes back to find that she has some lasting nerve damage.

Razor is asked to go back to her job, and goes into the meat kitchen only to find Witch has prepared a nasty surprise for her: interrogation. She tells Razor of the inherent danger she used to pose, and expresses distrust that she's really changed. Razor does not want to be a monster.

Opportunist, who is just the worst, tells Damsel about the murders Razor used to commit. Also he has a cold because he got sprayed by a water bottle by an anon. Repeatedly. As he deserves. Anyway, Damsel is horrified and disgusted, and now only trusts Oppy to tell the truth with her. She then talks to Connie, who says keeping things from her is the one rule they should have broken but didn't. Trust is rekindled there. She then talks to Witch, who advises against trusting Oppy but does just as much manipulation. She then talks to Oppy again, and learns that he and Witch killed each other in the construct.

Spectre asks Smitten how he's doing after the whole burgering incident, which improves his morale! He is then transferred to the meat kitchen, plunging it again.

Contrarian goes dumpster diving, and talks with Cold, and they nearly kiss but! Connie runs away again.

Damsel remembers she killed Quiet that one time in the construct and asks Prisoner about it. Prisoner, still defensive from their argument, continues to be a dick.

Dee meets several McTabby's employees! She eats the roach fryer, but is distraught when she learns it was Connie's pet, and gives them a rock carved in the shape of a roach as repayment. Cold proceeds to fix it, arming it with a taser. The gun is unrelated, it seems to have acquired that on its own.

Dee also goes on a quest to obtain peas! She is then arrested and sentenced to a month in jail. Wild, Jerry, and a few others break her out.

Suddenly, many objects gain sentience. This is the catalyst for Dragon going crazy and gaining a hunting license.

Razor has a great first shift, then takes a break and meets Smitten in the break room. Things are tense at first, but he agrees to give her another chance since he can see she's genuine about not wanting to be the way she used to be. At no point in this conversation does he realize she has amnesia. This should be fun!

Also in the break room, Witch talks to Razor, who asks why her name is Razor in a place where everyone's name seems to be some sort of title or descriptor...

But first, a word from our hypothetical sponsors!

Do you read The Stormlight Archives? Have you read The Stormlight Archives? Will you read The Stormlight Archives? When will you read The Stormlight Archives? The first book is called The Way Of Kings, and without spoiling anything, the first 100 pages include the most handsome man you've ever met having the absolute worst time of his life and the most beautiful woman you've ever met showing off her incredible wit. MTLWWCNN and the Construct in general are not affiliated with The Stormlight Archives, I as Tip just really enjoy this book so far.

Now back to our regularly scheduled broadcast!

Jerry asks Connie about their work hours, and Connie doesn't know what they're supposed to be in the first place! (22h)

Someone tells Deconstructed Damsel she should throw a beach party! This won't go wrong in the future at all! (21h)

Dee is given So Many peas, and places to grow peas, and offers to give away the surplus! She also feasts on roaches.

Nightmare serves a customer Cheese with extra Pain and Torment. (20h)

The Purple Candle visits the SCP operatives! Red freaks out, while Blue remains level-headed. This is a pattern that repeats when Beast and Den fix their plants, and when Sherlock arrives.

The Purple Candle and Sherlock visit the news station!

Someone gives Oppy peas. Dee eats them! Someone else gives him a gun. (19h)

Cold reveals that the red stain? Was ketchup. No more ketchup-fry attempts without Contrarian's help! (19h)

Spectre gets her Outside Time, longs to be free, then proceeds to talk to Cage, who gets lost in her eyes. (17-16)

Tower's bee-eph has an insightful conversation where he points out Connie gets wordy when they lie and that they instinctively blame themself for everything that goes wrong. Connie deliberately misinterprets. (16h)

Damsel and Hiyoko collectively freak out about the death of Anghel. (15h)

Tower and Fury have a fundamental disagreement over whether defiance should be scorned or praised, ending in Fury threatening Tower's bee-eph and Tower disappearing in a flash. (16h)

Sherlock pounces on Oppy, who is Not Afraid At All just get that cat away from him! Wraith makes note of this. (19-2h)

Spectre (not McSpectre) visits Default, and they basically reenact the non-violent route of the base game! Complete with Default eating her arm off, and trouble with the door. Tune in next time for how that unfolds! Thankfully, Narrator seems too busy at the office building next door to engage in any possession... (17-7)

The Freezer counts down to 2. (10h)

Cold decides to deep fry entire potatoes! He is also informed that Fury now works in the meat kitchen. (5-3h)

Witch bemoans the lack of knife hiding places in the McTabby's uniform. (4h)

Someone tries to tell Dee a deez... well, you know how that joke goes! She knows, too, and will not stand for it.

Someone tells Deconstructed Damsel she shouldn't rely on making others happy for her own happiness, and she misses the point entirely. (1h)

Connie is SO BRAVE and CONFESSES that they LIKE Cold!! Everybody cheer!!!!! (2h-22m)

Freezer Cow is invited into a religion. (31m)

Nightmare has escaped the cellar!! Witch, who is definitely not scared of her, goes to clean up in there, and finds a few bloodstains.

Nightmare and Skeptic both approach Oppy. Skeptic helps Oppy escape Nightmare, then asks for help regarding their jobs, suggesting they work to create a new and exciting position that would benefit them both. We learn that Skeptic has served 2-3 years in prison, and currently works as a hot dog mascot.

Smitten is informed that his ex kissed Connie. He has a reasonable reaction, and is not at all jealous, but is very aware of his own loneliness.

The Spectre that doesn't work at McTabby's visits Nightmare, and the two of them hold hands and throw menu items at customers. Ahh, young love!

Hunted is approached by several customers, informing him of various things such as: Contrarian's goose child, the fight club, and the yaoi kiss. We learn that he doesn't like coffee (based) and doesn't think Oppy is a bastard (WHAT???)!

Cold is distracted, thinking about yaoi, and Jerry watches him cook fries. He feeds it some, realizing its capabilities of mitosis. The HEA-lth inspector arrives, unnerved by the Jerries, but doesn't question things too much. They answered her question correctly, after all!

Dee receives a pound of peas!! Dee gives Jerry peas!!!!!

The Cow eats a camera. The eyes of the Other must be disposed of. Don't ask me what that means!

Wounded Wild is visited by Sherlock and someone who calls her sigma (she doesn't know what that means), and praises the Greys' work ethic in dealing with the fires.

Cage falls off the fridge, and Jerry finds her in the sink. It decides to be her friend, and cuddles with her for the night.

Prisoner visits Nightmare in her cellar!  Not knowing about the aura of death hanging around Nightmare like a veil of mist, Prisoner feels unwell, and tells Nightmare that they shouldn't lock her up if Razor is allowed free.

Witch notices that Connie's face is injured, and berates them for allowing it to happen while giving them advice on how to treat the wound.

Dee witnesses a mushroom dance!

TLQ picks Sherlock up and goes on a lunch break to find his owner.

Hero discovers his bank account balance keeps halving...

Damsel is on her period :( obviously the worst and most egregious torture this universe has ever subjected its denizens to

Prisoner reveals to an anon that she doesn't think she can get lung cancer from smoking!

Jerry tries to fight Sherlock! Sherlock thinks it's play fighting, and Jerry is charmed and actually does play fight with him. No animals were harmed!

The freezer counts down to 3.

Razor tells Witch that she's wrong and their natures are not immutable. Razor can be more than a killing machine, and Witch can, maybe, try to trust someone for once. This concludes their conversation.

Damsel is visited by Sherlock! She subjects him to baby talk, pets, and scritches :)

The candle wax drips into crow shapes. Someone attempts to douse it, but it absorbs the water. It is placated with small pieces of paper to burn, and smells of flowers now. It also claims that the crow was all it saw when it was created, and that they threw a cigarette, which is what the candle owes to its lighting, and then died.

Jerry is hired as shift manager and proceeds to interview several of its underlings on their satisfaction with work hours! Shifty has a new favorite~

Dee receives a prophecy!

Razor stumbles into Contrarian on her way out of the kitchen, and they have a very fine and normal conversation with absolutely zero tension, of the platonic or romantic kind (this is a lie)! Nobody has a breakdown at all (they both do), and Razor is amazing at lying (no she's not)! As for things that did happen, Razor cries, Contrarian panics, they promise not to leave, and the two of them agree neither of them are okay. Razor suggests going to see Damsel, and Contrarian, remembering that Damsel recently learned of Razor's old habits and didn't have a good opinion of them, does their best to deflect.

Dee gains TWO bodyguards, one of whom is Eye of the Needle. Dee is a mazed !

Spectre asks Shifty permission to leave McTabby's on her break, and she gets it! ...As long as she remains on the premises. Baby steps, keep your chin up!

Dragon enters the fry kitchen with new containers, only to find Cold has already dumped all the fries on the counter. She leaves it be.

Broken returns with the meat!! Everybody cheer!!!! Shifty gives him the rest of the day off, in a completely unprecedented move never before seen from her.

Sherlock acts as a poison detection cat. His definition of poison? Extra pickles.

Witch asks Damsel for advice on being liked, claiming she's one of the most hated in the restaurant and ordering a milkshake. Damsel thinks people like Witch just fine, and has also developed minor self-esteem issues due to people snapping at her recently.

The Contrarian Intern starts beef with ME!!! How DARE he!!!!

Cold finds something red smeared on his shirt...

Smitten's feathers are thoroughly ruffled. He also encounters FIVE WHOLE WOMEN IN ONE, and is informed by Wraith of Fury's imminent arrival.

Fury questions the Freezer Cow's existence. Dragon tells her she's better off ignoring it.

Tower's bee-eph and Connie have a talk while Tower and Fury are busy. Bee-eph insists that Connie is hurting, and not just physically.

Jerry dies and enters the fae realm?

Tower decides she needs a new plan: not as many people have been flocking to her side as expected, so she will be engaging in some tactical kindness. She hates Shifty, so she will be watching the McTabby's employees and helping them not to be miserable! And then they will see how much Better it will be under her, and swear their undying fealty! Dragon immediately rebukes her for being cruel to The Long Quiet, and turns around to leave but shoots Tower in the heart before actually leaving, claiming to have been everywhere and experienced everything.

Sherlock purchases cat treats from WallWall. It is truly such a good cat.

Hero asks Broken why he's at this job, prompting Broken to rightly respond that a minimum wage job is just the right amount of demoralizing for the voice that represents hopelessness and despair.

Stranger enters the cabin! Sees Connie, punches on sight. Most of her selves didn't want to, but two of them were very much down for it. Connie did not resist, in fact encouraged it. Then went to the drink fridge, got an ice pack, and talked to Cage, who gets nervous when it gets dark. Damsel arrives, sees that neither of them are okay, and is tired of being lied to, so presses until they tell her what's going on. Cage starts having a PTSD attack, which Damsel helps her with and Connie grabs some comfort items from their closet in an attempt to help. Cage has the Asshole defense mechanism, though, and so scoffs at their attempt to help, prompting them to slink away. Damsel assures Cage that she cares about her, and Dragon appears and gives her an additional pep talk.

Cold is told Connie got punched and rushes to dote over them. They start to cry, and after being taken to their closet, they talk about care, about wishing they were someone other than who they are, about feeling incapable of being loved - and then the YAOI BIRDS KISS, EVERYONE!

French Drowned instates a Quest Request Board at the Liquor Store! People with Requests can go through the Liquor Store to post them on the board! Dragon rejoices.

There's a second Spectre! Can move between cabins, but not elsewhere. Wraith and Dragon join in on the convo, talking about how many ghosts there are in this building. With all the skeletons in the closet, the ghost population doesn't surprise me.

Jerry works out at the fight club.

Deconstructed Damsel expresses loneliness, but is fine as long as everyone's happy once all their problems are over! Jerry visits her, and she watches happily as it licks the floor.

Freezer Cow posts another screenshot of the discord. We are very excited to see it.

Oppy steals Dragon's lunch. She is Greatly Unhappy about it, and threatens him very directly, causing him to be intimidated out of stealing any further sandwiches.

Connie is approached by Tower, who engages in her new strategy of being Kind to people so that they will see how much better it is with her. She doesn't want to do it with Connie, but her bee-eff convinces her to. Connie says they're good here (Tower did not prepare for this situation), prompting a discussion about Stranger.

Witch attempts to flirt with Spectre. It doesn't go as well as she expected, but Spectre did take it well, so there's hope!

Dragon and Shifty discuss employment hours. Apparently, "full-time" means "all the time". Dragon is fine with this as long as she can take more lunch breaks.

Adversary and Stubborn fight, Stubborn immediately crumpling and getting stuffed into the punching bag. Just another day in the fight club.

Dragon reveals that she has wings now, and the power of the void! She uses said powers to comfort Dee after her jailbreak, and to threaten those who would scare the Dee.

Skeptic apprehends Sherlock, who is not supposed to be washing himself on the register.

The Freezer counts down to 4.

Continuing the discussion of Razor's past, Witch squeezes Razor's arm, causing her to feel as if she is being cut from the inside. Which she is, because her bones are knives! She tells the amnesiac more about the nature of the princesses, and that she used to be single-mindedly obsessed with killing. She insists that none of them can change their nature, and that is hers.

Dee would like some peas!

Nobody told Skeptic what his job title was going to be, so he's taken up the mantle of janitor. Witch feels this is an infringement on her capability (or, doesn't trust Skeptic. that's always a valid interpretation for her!) and suggests he assist Opportunist in his job instead.

1.

Q: So could you tell the audiance who you are? A: Hello I am the Wanderer. I run Wandy's.

2.

Q: ok, now could you tell me, specifically who you are.  A: Hi I'm the Wanderer, it's nice to meet you. 

3.

Q: How do you square the fact that your existence is predicated on you being a "wanderer" yet you own an establishment?  A: I mean... it feels a little weird. Sometimes I want to leave and not come back until I've seen everything in the world. But I really want this whole thing to work out, so I'll stay here. At least, until the place can work without me. Then, I'll be able to go explore.

4.

Q: Is it called Wandy's, because you are secretly selling black market wands?  A: No it's called Wandy's because I am also called Wandy because it's short for my name! What even are 'black market wands'?!

5.

Q: How much money would the megacorporation of Mctabbies have to pay you to get you to sell out your store, or do you have principles?  A: It's more of a pride thing than a money thing.

6.

Q: *Clears throat* To quote somebody that everybody's talking about "Viva La Revolucion", do you have a comment? A: Ew those words give me bad vibes. I don't like them.

7.

Q: What is your opinion of the Contrarian cooks establishment?  A: Contrarian cooks? Oh, the rainbow bird! They have poor taste in food but she's good company.

8.

Q: What is your opinion on taxes?  A: What are those?

9.

Q: Now, you hunt your food out in the wilds of the city parking lots and alleyways. I have to ask, are you ensuring that your kitchen is sanitary, and does that mean your food is free range? A:I actually hunt them in the woods, not to be confused with the woods hahahaha, and I guess they're free range? But some of them are kept in the vivarium, so these ones aren't. On the question of whether my kitchen is sanitary, yeeeah don't worry about it :)

10.

Q: What is your opinion on taxes, and what is your opinion on social programs? A:Still don't know what taxes are, don't know what social programs are either.

11.

Q: What is your opinion on Love? A:Love... It causes a lot of pain, yet it also brings bliss so wonderful that makes it worth fighting for. I would love to fall in love once more for the first time.

12.

Q: What is your opinion on death?  A:I mean, if nothing died ever the whole world would destroy itself. Things have to end someday, even if it hurts to let go.

13.

Q: Any cycles that you are planning on escaping? Or have already escaped? And if you would, why do you want to grow, or what helped you get through it? (sorry for the unproffesionality, im new to this) A:Your physical sensations begin to dull and vanish, until the only things left are the endlessly repeating patterns and emotions of a journey to a destination long forgotten... Fear. Trust. Power. Danger. And at the heart of it all, an emotion that can only be described as— "I'm sorry, what were we talking about?

----