#mr. gloop

Mr. Teavee: And then?!

They all have different names from their “regular” versions, I think.

Mr. Beauregarde: Sam (usually he’s Eugene)

Mrs. Beauregarde: Caroline (usually she’s Scarlett)

Mr. Teavee: John (usually he’s Norman)

Mrs. Teavee: Molly (usually she’s Doris)

Mr. Gloop: Wolfgang (he never got a name, but I normally call him Friedrich)

Mrs. Gloop: Roxanne (same as her husband, but everyone who knows me knows that I normally call her Gertrude)

Mr. Salt: Henry (normally he’s either Rupert or Oleg)

Mrs. Salt: Henrietta (normally she’s Angina)

Mr. Bucket: Thomas (he never got a name either. I think he should be Joseph Jr. and his father is Joseph Sr.)

Augustus and his parents, doing the conga: You don’t vin friends mit salad! You don’t vin friends mit salad! You don’t vin friends mit salad-!

Charlie, joining in: You don’t win friends with salad!

Wonka: Charlie!

Mr. Gloop: Gertie, I, uh --- lofe you. No, zat's not good. Gertie, honey, I lofe you. Oh, um, Gertie, I lofe ya, baby. Gertie, sveetie, "hooney", honey, ahh, zis vill nefer vork.

(Mrs. Gloop opens the door for him before he even puts in his key. She stares angrily, about to pounce when--- Mr. Gloop holds up the flowers and heart-shaped chocolate box innocently.)

Mr. Gloop: I lofe you, Gertrude.

Mrs. Gloop: Oh, Friedrich. I lofe you too.

Mrs. Gloop: Shopping.

Mr. Gloop: Eating.

Wonka: I meant with dance.

Mr. Gloop: Ze eat.

Mrs. Gloop: Ze shop.

Mr. Gloop: (twisting sausages) Vell, sort of. Vy?

Augustus: Oh, nozing. I vas just zinking, maybe if you had ze time, you and I could do a Vater-Sohn kind of project. You know, just ze two of us.

Mr. Gloop: Of course ve can! Zat’s more important zan zis! Vat vould you like to do?

Augustus: Vork zat body, Papa.

Mr. Gloop: You know, vone day you'll learn to move like your old man.

Augustus: Not if I can help it.

(Mr. Gloop applies shaving cream.)

Mr. Gloop: Son, zere's not a voman alife who can resist a man who knows how to mambo.

Augustus: You don't haf a clue, do you, Papa?

Mr. Gloop: Out, boy. (throws some cream at him) Out!

Augustus: Vat a grump.

(Augustus leaves and Mr. Gloop shaves, then feels his face.)

Mrs. Gloop: Ve vere driving und zere vas a deer on ze road, so I yelled "Friedrich, deer!"

Wonka: And?

Mrs. Gloop: Tell him vat you said.