#mousechaser

Cws- Cat Death, Mentions of Cat Death

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A long, long time ago…

“...And up there is Mousechaser.”

Violetkit’s eyes widened. She followed Owlshade’s outstretched paw up towards the night sky. The vast expanse seemed to pulse with deep shades of purple and blue, dark clouds swirling and making their way over the moon. The older tom was pointing at a group of stars.

Violetkit tilted her head. “Why’d they call it Mousechaser, Papa?” She asked.

“Well…” Owlshade lowered his paw, shifting a bit to sit closer to his daughter. He wrapped his tail around her, letting out the low rumbling purr that she’d grown to recognize in her two- no, two and a half- moons of living. “...It’s a long story, sweetheart. And you have to go to bed soon..”

“Please!” Violetkit begged. “I super promise that I’ll go to bed after you tell me!”

“Promise?”

“Cross my whiskers.” Violetkit replied, puffing her chest out. “That means I’m telling the truth!”

Owlshade chucked. “Well…If that’s the case…I can’t say no to such an honest little thing, can I?”

Violetkit snuggled closer to Owlshade, blinking up at him. “Thank you, Papa.”

“You’re welcome. Now…”

The white tom cleared his throat. “Long ago, there was a young molly named Mousesong. Mousesong was an interesting cat- Her body was short, her ears were big, and her voice was…Well, it was as quiet as a mouse. She was a small, meek warrior, and her clanmates never took her seriously. They always laughed at her, teased her, and refused to let her play their games. She was always last to be picked for patrols, and no cat dared to consider her as a mate.”

“That’s mean!” Violetkit exclaimed. “If I were her clanmate, she could play with me!”

“Mhm,” Owlshade hummed. “Now…Mousesong wanted to prove that she could be a respectable warrior. Leaf-bare was coming, and prey was scarce. The leader at the time began to fear that the clan would starve to death.”

“What clan was she in, Papa?” Violetkit asked. “Was it BranchClan?”

“...Yes.” Owlshade replied, after a momentary pause. “Yes, it was.”

“Wow!”

“Yes, now let me finish. The longer it takes the longer before you get some sleep.” Owlshade cleared his throat. “Where was I…?”

“Somethin’ about Leaf-bare.” Violetkit mumbled. Her eyes were already beginning to droop, her head feeling as if it were being weighed down. She rested her head between her front paws, staring up at Owlshade.

“Right, right. Now, Mousesong heard the leader’s lament, and wanted to help. She snuck out of camp during a big blizzard, and wandered the territory. Then, she saw it. The biggest, fattest mouse she’d ever seen!” Owlshade’s blue eyes brightened, and for a moment he almost looked more excited than Violetkit. “She had to catch it. If she caught this mouse, and brought it back to the clan, then everyone would love her. So…She began to give chase.”

“You said Leaf-bare is cold…” Violetkit shivered. “I bet her paws didn’t feel too good.”

“They didn’t.” Owlshade shook his head. “Mousesong ran, and ran, and ran. The chill in the air worsened as the blizzard grew more intense, and the mouse only seemed to be getting faster. Soon enough, Mousesong collapsed.”

“Oh, no!” Violetkit exclaimed. “Was she okay?”

“If you would let me finish, sweetheart, you would know.” Owlshade replied dryly. “Anyway…Mousesong was cold. Her paws were numb from the freezing cold, and she couldn’t breathe in the freezing wind. She thought that she was going to die…When a starry cat approached her.”

A pause, for emphasis, and then Owlshade continued. “This cat introduced themself as Starclan. Mousesong thought she was going to die, but no. StarClan was giving her something much, much better.”

Violetkit’s ears pricked a bit. Owlshade smiled.

“He was going to give her a new name and a permanent place in the stars. That way, whenever her clanmates looked up at the sky, they would see her. They would remember how they treated her, and her sacrifice for her clan. Mousesong suddenly got a burst of strength! She got up, and ran more. She continued to chase the mouse all the way up into the sky…Leaving her body behind. Her clan found her the next dawn patrol, frozen and cold. They regretted how they’d treated her. But that night, when they looked up into the sky…”

He pointed at the constellation. Now the bundle of stars were more clear to Violetkit. “...They saw Mousechaser…” He moved his paw to the side, towards a smaller constellation. “...And her mouse.”

“Papa, that story’s sad!” Violetkit squeaked out with the last of her energy. She cuddled closer to Owlshade’s side. “...I hope I meet Mousechaser one day. I’ll be her friend. I’ll be everyone’s friend! Even Starclan! Hopefully Starclan likes me…”

“Oh, I’m sure Starclan will love you just as much as I do.” Owlshade purred. He leaned down, gently licking the top of Violetkit’s head to encourage her to sleep. “Rest now, little one. Tomorrow is a new day. Goodnight. I love you, Violetkit.”

Violetkit smiled, nuzzling into Owlshade’s white pelt. “G’night. I love you too…”

…

“...Papa?”

Owlshade opened his eyes. The familiar camp that had surrounded him when he fell asleep was gone. Instead, he was in a void. The sky above him was a light blue, and the ground was pure white. The light around him was so bright he had to squint to see properly. When he rose to his paws, a new feeling flooded his body.

“That’s odd,” he meowed to himself. “My body doesn’t ache anymore.”

“Papa…Papa…??”

That voice again. It was familiar, and sounded faint. Owlshade looked around with widened eyes, and finally laid eyes on…A portal? A mirror? He couldn’t tell.

Violetstar was hunched over something. Her body was shaking, quick breaths coming from her as she nudged a still lump of white fur.

A lump that Owlshade quickly realized, with a jolt of fear, that it was him.

Owlshade watched, horror creeping through his body, as Sweetwing ran out of the nursery. A faint mewling was coming from inside- Burdockfrost must’ve had his kits. The brown and white healer was a blur of fur, skidding to a halt and nearly crashing into Violetstar.

“What? What’s wrong with him!?” Owlshade heard Sweetwing ask.

“He’s not moving! He’s not waking up!” Violetstar sobbed. “Help him, please!”

Owlshade’s ears flattened. He stared, stunned into silence, as Sweetwing pressed a paw against his chest, where his heart was. Her expression fell into a solemn one, and she gave a final shake of her head.

“Stars above…” She whispered, turning to Violetstar with a saddened dip of her head. “I’m sorry, Violetstar.”

The sound that came out of Violetstar was one that would be burned into Owlshade’s memory forever. It started as a choked sob, then broke off into a wail of despair.

“No…” Owlshade whispered, shaking his head and taking a step back. “No, no, no. I can’t be dead- I wasn’t supposed to-”

“It’s a funny feeling, isn’t it?”

The voice made Owlshade pause, his fur bristling as he turned to the source. Standing a few feet away, tail lowered to the ground, was a face he hadn’t seen in over a hundred moons.

“Charfeather,” Owlshade breathed. “...Mother.”

“Owlshade.” Charfeather greeted with a curt head dip. “You’re dead.”

“Dead? But…” Owlshade began to tremble. “I can’t be dead. I just went to sleep. I wanted to wake up. I wanted-”

Charfeather cut him off with a hiss. “You can’t always get what you want, Owlshade. Be grateful- You got to go peacefully. You didn’t die alone and in pain. You didn’t feel a fraction of what I felt!”

The tortoiseshell molly stepped forward, fur bristled and pupils narrowed into slits. “I should kill you again. I should watch your essence spill onto this ground and leave you to be forgotten.”

“No!” Owlshade pleaded. He glanced behind him to see the mirror, or whatever that thing was, gone. There was nothing left but him, Charfeather, and this seemingly endless void. All he heard was the sound of his heart pounding, the blood roaring in his ears, and his own panicked breaths. “Please! Please, you have to let me explain! Please, Mama!”

Charfeather froze. Owlshade got a glimpse of the way her expression softened, only briefly, before hardening back into that cold indifference.

“...Speak now.” She said, authoritatively. She straightened herself up, looking down her muzzle at Owlshade. “And don’t you try to run either. This space may be endless, but it’s not StarClan yet. You will get tired, and I will catch you.”

Owlshade stuttered, fumbling with his words a little before speaking. “I didn’t- Listen. I know I…Left you. Back then.”

“Mmhm.”

“No, stop, listen.” Owlshade held his front paws up. “Please. I was wrong. I was young, Mother. I was twenty moons old, and everyone was dead, and…I’m no healer, what could I have done? Your face, your leg…You were bleeding so much…”

“You could’ve gone to another clan. They had healers.” Charfeather grumbled.

“And I didn’t. I was worried about Violetkit…I couldn’t leave her. If you’d died on the way there and she was left alone, and the dogs came back…” Owlshade shuddered. “I couldn’t lose both of you. I just couldn’t. I’d already lost the rest of my kits, and my mate, and my entire clan. I had no choice.”

Charfeather’s eyes narrowed. Owlshade continued.

“...And it hurt me.” He confessed, his voice lowering. “It hurt me to curl up in that den, around her, while all I could think about was the fact that you were out there dying. It hurt me to sing lullabies to my daughter, knowing that you’d sung them to me long ago. It hurt me to know that you gave your life to save my daughter…”

He lowered his head in shame, his voice cracking. “...And I was too much of a coward to risk my life for my mother.”

The silence between them stretched on. Owlshade tensed, bracing himself for the claws in his throat, for the searing pain, and for the feeling of fading out of existence forever.

It never came.

“Do you understand how much it hurt me too?” Charfeather growled. “To not only watch my own son betray me, but to not even be granted a peaceful afterlife?”

Owlshade’s eyes widened. He looked up at Charfeather. “You didn’t go to StarClan?” 

“No.” The word was sharp. “They didn’t let me in. Said I was too vengeful. Too angry. That I didn’t deserve paradise. All because I was upset!”

She clawed at the ground, a yowl of anguish escaping her. “I was so…So mad at you! I hated you! I hated you so much that I thought death was too kind for you. I wanted you to feel hurt. I wanted you to feel what I felt!”

Owlshade remained silent, though his chest tightened. How could Charfeather say that? He wanted to open his mouth and protest, to tell her that she was his mother! Mothers didn’t hate their kits…

…Then he remembered Wren. How she’d look at Aspenkit with disdain in her eyes. 

His mouth closed tight, and he stayed silent.

“...I had a plan. A plan that started when I conveniently guided Wren to join your clan. You two moved fast, and soon enough, you had kits.” Charfeather murmured. “...I noticed your son, Aspenfall. He was a good target since kithood. You remember Spiderstep, right?”

Owlshade slowly nodded. “How could I forget her?”

“...Greencough never killed her. It was me. I took her.” Charfeather said, voice low. “I needed her gone. I needed Aspenfall to feel vulnerable, and desperate, like he’d lost everything. Like he’d do anything to have that sliver of happiness. And I gave it to him. For a price.”

She paused, letting the words register.

“...Briarkit was a good enough vessel. But as time went on, as I watched through his eyes and guided him, I noticed something.” She looked away. “I noticed that no matter how many cats I took away from you, no matter how much evil and hardship I put into your life…You kept coming back. You continued to smile. You continued to love. You continued to thrive.”

Her expression softened again, but this time she didn’t let it harden. She sat down, politely curling her tail around her paws. “Things really changed when I realized Briarburn wasn’t being affected either. He found Berrysnow, and suddenly it seemed like my words didn’t impact him anymore. And then there was…Frozenbeam. I saw how vile he was, and I finally came to a realization. I don’t want to share an afterlife with cats like him. With cats who genuinely have evil in their hearts. So..I told you all of that to say…”

She looked up at Owlshade. “...That I am sorry, Owlshade.”

Owlshade was silent. For a moment, he didn’t know what to say. Was this a trick? Was she going to claw his heart out if he showed even a shred of forgiveness or vulnerability?

Then he looked at her. Charfeather looked…Smaller, somehow. Her ears were pinned back, and she had lowered her head in a gesture of submission. Her tail was wrapped tightly around her body, slightly bristled with emotion.

She was genuine.

“...I’m sorry too. For leaving you in the first place.” Owlshade finally said, his eyes pricked with oncoming tears. “If I had known…I wouldn’t have…Oh, stars, Mama…”

He stepped forward, pressing his head into her chest fur. “I forgive you. Please forgive me, too. I don’t want you to hurt anymore.”

Charfeather stiffened briefly, then wrapped a foreleg around Owlshade. A low, raspy purr came out of her, and Owlshade almost felt like a kit again. 

“I forgive you too.”

Suddenly, a warmth enveloped the two of them. Owlshade felt like he was floating, his blue eyes widening for just a second. He looked at Charfeather, who briefly looked just as worried, though her grip on him tightened.

“Don’t look,” She meowed. “Just stay close to me.”

Owlshade silently nodded, tightly closing his eyes. As the warmth enveloped them more, and more, until soon he blacked out.

It was for only a few seconds. Owlshade opened his eyes again to find himself in a new place. The sky was littered with stars, the air smelled crisp and clean, and he felt lighter than he ever had before.

“Welcome, Charfeather. Welcome, Owlshade.” A soft voice said, one that Owlshade had never heard before.

Owlshade pulled away from Charfeather and looked towards the voice. A black and white cat stood before them. Her legs were short, her belly low to the ground. Her light yellow eyes were gleaming with warmth.

“Mousechaser?” Owlshade whispered, eyes widening. “You’re…”

“...Real? Yes.” Mousechaser purred, beaming. “My story wasn’t just old nursery tales, y’know.”

Owlshade took a moment to look around. He saw a pool of clear water a little bit away, the surface glittering with tiny stars. Cats surrounded the pool, drinking from it and sharing tongues.

Prey seemed to run abundantly, and Owlshade even saw a few familiar faces.

He saw Leifcloud, her paws tucked beneath her body as she conversed with a dark gray tom. She looked younger, and happier than Owlshade had ever seen her. He saw Flutterpool, happily playing with two kits that Owlshade didn’t recognize. One was a cream tom-kit with brown patches, the other a dark brown and white she-kit. Spiderstep was lying a few feet away from the small group, watching them with a soft expression. A dark brown kit with white paws was curled at her belly.

He then saw Fawnspring. The white-furred molly was sitting with Doecall, and the two of them were tending to a group of four kits. Owlshade realized very quickly how similar the kits looked to Violetstar.

Mousechaser chuckled. “Welcome to StarClan, you two. I believe you’ve both earned a place here at this point.”

Owlshade looked at Charfeather. “What do we do now?”

Charfeather looked at Owlshade, and she grinned. She got into a playful crouch, wiggling her haunches. “I’ll race you to that water pool. We’ll get a drink, and then I think you have some friends to properly introduce me to, yeah?”

Owlshade smiled, mirroring Charfeather’s crouch. “Yeah. Come on, you old molly. Let’s go.”

The two cats took off, laughing like kits.

The stars seemed to glow just a little brighter that night, and for once in his life…

…Owlshade was happy.