So each little girl listened; at first at least. Many girls grew up and rebelled, claiming the thing that was to be saved for someone who wasn't them wasn't worth it.

"Save yourself," Y/n whispered over and over again throughout middle school, high school, college, graduate school, and even job after job until the words filled her brain like a mirror full of lipstick; each time feel dirtier than before.

But still, she remained pure throughout training at the FBI academy and through her units, wearing a badge of shame when she was told it should be an honor.

That honor caused her to push the first boy she ever loved, going back to the tenth grade as they danced on the prom floor, lips finding each other and bodies finding home in his parents' backseat before she ran because she couldn't break her pureness.

That honor caused her to feel like an outcast as everyone talked about their one-night stands and nights to remember while she bit the tip of her pen, just wanting to relate for once.

And that same honor makes her feel dirty now. She looks at Agent Morgan, listening to the stories he tells about the women that he just had the previous night wondering why she wanted to be them. She wanted to be free like them and dance the way he says they do. She wanted to ignore her mind and be free.

But she wanted to do it with him.

She wanted to dance the night along with Agent Morgan in clubs hand and hand.

She wanted to feel the soft kisses he would lay.

She wanted it all.

He made her feel dirty, like the whores that her mother talked about. He made her feel transparent, like a see-through glass that has something others lost.

"You sure you don't wanna come out with us little lady?" Derek asks for the third time.

"Yes." Heavy venom and pain that is undue come out with the word as Y/n keeps her head down; refusing to give the man attention.

"Alright." He no longer pushes and leaves with the rest of the team soon after.

Save yourself. Save yourself. Save yourself.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It didn't take a profiler to see something was wrong with Y/n.

About two months ago, they became distant, jumpy, arriving to work a little later, and they even started snapping at people.

Every time someone asked Y/n if they were ok, a glare and a snarky comment were received, sometimes the comments hurt but no remorse was found in their teammate's face.

But what really happened was Y/n's little sister was playing soccer and hit her head. She needed surgery and never made it off the table.

Y/n saw their little sister as their own kid. To them, it was a parental loss, and nothing more.

The team didn't know that Y/n had a little sister, as they never really talked too much about themselves.

Y/n didn't mention the loss to anyone and used work as an escape, afraid to drink their feelings away.

Y/LS/N wouldn't like that, so Y/n didn't do it.

But everyone was tired of being left out of the dark.

Their once happy and joy-bringing friend became a dark and miserable human.

So one day when the BAU had no cases, they decided to confront them.

Calling them to the conference room, they all sat down in their usual spots as if there was a case.

Suggesting the worst, when Y/n sat down Hotch and Morgan stood up and went to block the two doors that lead out the room.

"Do we have a case?" Y/n asked when they saw the two men get up.

Spencer was the first to speak.

"What's going on with you Y/n?" His tone was worried and it didn't go unnoticed by Y/n but they really couldn't care at the moment.

"What do you mean what is going on with me?" Y/n shot back sending the same glare, as usual, this time it having no effect on Spencer.

"That! You are snapping at people left to right, you don't hang out with us anymore, and we are worried!" He put his hands in the air with a frustrated sigh.

" Nothing. I am fine." Y/n's deadpan eyes looked between Hotch and Morgan as they scoffed.

"Are you serious? You fucking trapped me in here? Oh, poor Y/n, they don't want to hang out with us anymore so there must be something wrong, the best way to find out is a fucking intervention!" They mocked but they weren't done.

They smacked their hand on the desk as they finished their last sentence, making almost everyone jump.

"I AM FINE. STOP ASKING ME IF I AM OK LIKE I AM FUCKING BROKEN. I AM COMPLETELY FINE. OK? TO ANSWER THE SAME DUMBASS QUESTION THAT YOU KEEP ASKING ME, I AM FUCKING FANTASIC, SO FANTASTIC THAT THIS IS NOT NEEDED SO LET ME GO."  They screamed.

It was the first emotion, other than anger that was seen in months. It takes everyone a second but Garcia was the next to speak.

"It is very clear that you aren't. And that is ok, we just want to help you." She spoke kindly, trying not to agitate the angry person who stood before her.

" You want to "help me?" Y/n mocked and put her fingers in the air to quote help me.

"Tell me this, how do you help someone who loses their only joy in a cruel world? How do you help someone who has to get a phone call saying that their baby sister is dead and they didn't get to say goodbye? How do you help someone that can save so many other people, but not the one person who needed them? TELL ME. TELL ME AND THEN YOU CAN HELP ME." Y/n blurted out.

They were now in tears and shaking after finally getting it all out.

It wasn't a burden on their chest anymore.

Still shaking and crying, they didn't even realize JJ's arms around them until they were both on the ground and Y/n was crying into JJ's shirt.

"I didn't get to say goodbye," Y/n mumbled over and over again as JJ held them, protecting them from all the cruelty in this world.

They stayed like that for a while so everyone but Hotch left the two of them alone.

After a good maybe 20 minutes, JJ finally speaks.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Her tone was caring, but it was also worried like Spencer's.

" I don't know. It was too much. I just-" They stop and look at Hotch. "I just don't know."

"We are a family, Y/n. We can help you past this. That is what family does." Hotch spoke.

Family.

To Y/n, the only family they ever had was 6 feet buried in the ground.

Family.

No words came out of their mouth. They just nodded.

"Why don't you tell us about your little sister?"

JJ, Hotch, and Y/n all shot their heads up to the door to see the rest of the team at the doorway.