Punday! -Anonymoose
For everyone who is not aware today is the self-announced Punday! That means I want to have a punny punday and we shall have such a day because I so declare it. To start, I once knew a cross-eyed teacher who could not control his pupils. That was a sight for sore eyes. In addition, my butcher backed into a meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
Now that that has happened, let’s get back into puns. I have a friend who has two twins that she gave up for adoption. One was adopted by an Egyptian family and named him “Amal” while a family in Spain adopted the other child and named him “Juan”. The Spanish family sent the birth family a picture of Juan. After seeing the picture of Juan, the wife really wanted to see Amal but the husband just told her what was on his mind: “They are twins! If you have seen Juan, you have seen Amal.”
On another note: NEW INVENTIONS! Did you hear about these new reversible jackets? I'm excited to see how they turn out. What about the pencils with erasers at both ends? I’d buy one… But I don’t see the point. There is a new type of broom that is sweeping the nation! Even the new weed whacker is cutting-hedge technology.
I decided that becoming a vegetarian was a missed steak. So that means on to foods! Greengrocers earn a meager celery, come home beet, and just want to read the pepper, take a leek, turnip the covers endive into bed. I also found out that a boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat. Also, never leave alphabet soup on the stove and then leave. It could spell disaster.
So has everyone had enough puns? Yes? That is weird. You do realize, seven days without a pun makes one weak. I remember when I was growing up, my family was so poor we couldn’t even afford to pay attention. And to make matters worse, my dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering. But I did find out that in a recession, the most secure job is garbage-man. Business is always picking up.
I used to hate math but then I realized decimals have a point. I guess it is safe to say that math teachers have many problems. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from my algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption. I had a friend who was Atheists, and he cannot solve exponential equations because he doesn’t believe in higher powers.
To close the end of this Punday post let me just say that I used to know this joke about amnesia but I forgot how it goes. And if I remember, I will tell you. My friends tell me I am a skeptic - but I do not believe a word they say. And as a note to all of you lovely people out there: Never make fun of a Scotsman's traditional garb. You could get kilt that way.
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