False Humility in Women's Ministry
There is a certain kind of historical humility written about by (usually Roman Catholic) saints that is fixated on smallness, weakness, and a need for protection. In the historical context in which it was written (pre-20th Century), this was a genuine expression of piety for both men and women.
Despite certain periods of aesthetic psychosis, where weakness and illness were exalted for both men and women (typically among artists and ill nobility), for the vast majority of human history, people considered physical strength and competence, health, tallness, and muscularity to be both good physical traits overall and marks of spiritual virtue. Physically weak people, the ill, chronically ill, and disabled, and even the short, were often seen as spiritually lesser. At that point in history, meditations on viewing oneself as small, incompetent, weak, and vulnerable (for both men and women) were radical acts of humility.
In the Western World, this view of virtue-- for women-- is no longer the norm. We are in a period of our history where it is an almost universal belief that a good woman, both aesthetically and in her virtue and nature, is small (both thin and short), helpless, weak, and unindependent. Even sickness is praised in women, and this phenomenon has left the artistic realms of abuse where it usually arises historically. Debilitating stomach issues, mineral deficiencies, and even TB (a disease few Westerners have or ever will experience) are romanticized by both men and women and are, subtextually, seen as virtuous, attractive, and good.
It is no coincidence that there has been renewed popularity in Women's Ministry TM of this kind of "meditation on humility". The most common root of this is Sister Therese of Lisieux and her writings, particularly "A Story of A Soul", from which Therese's title "Little Flower" is taken. It comes from several lines/passages where she describes herself as a wildflower, as a little bird, and other very adorable, quaint things of good repute. To judge the autobiography with honesty, the expectation of virtue for women being strength and countenance was already on its way out, so even at the time, this was a different interpretation of humility that would have been considered standard.
Various Women's Ministry programs today now encourage girls and women to exercise "Humility" by referring to themselves as cute little animals, darling flowers, and people both in need of and deserving of protection. "When you're being mean to me online, this is who you're being mean to, [insert pic of adorable baby animal]" is very much a spiritual fruit of this practice.
This is not Humility. This is self-flattery. It is a good thing in today's world for a woman to be weak and small, and comparing women to elegant animals (baby or adult) and vegetation has always been flattering. This is an interpretation of Humility that exists to make women feel better about themselves-- not to make them more in tune with reality and less obsessed with themselves, which is what Humility actually is. The Baby-Animal-School-of-Mortification just makes the sufferer think more about themselves and less about God. It inspires a view of Christ that amounts to a boyfriend or an older brother, and this is both a degradation of Christ and of our relationship with him. It also amounts to denying your ability to sin in a way that hurts anyone but yourself. I've said this before, but you need to know your ability to hurt a person. You're not an innocent flower-- you're a person.
A meditation on Humility is not something that should soothe the prideful reader. It is not a genuine expression of humility to repeat that God expects very little of us and even our smallest effort is great in his eyes, because that is a lie; God expects perfection of us, but we will all fail and incur an irrecoverable debt. It is not humility to run from your responsibilities under the cover of perpetual adolescence or "littleness". This is especially poor spiritual advice for laypeople and clergy because our responsibilities involve others in an intimate way, such as caring for children, parents, paritioners, businesses, etc. Lives are at stake, and you cannot doddle around with fixations on being like a violet flower.
Humility is accepting that you will never be enough, not that you are enough. Because you are not enough. 100,000 deaths like yours could not even save one other Man from the weight of sin and from this fallen world. We are not little flowers, we are dead Men walking this Earth. Humility gifts you with the freedom to accept this deficiency.
