Jiang Cheng lets out a deep sigh when the door closes behind him. Today has been an absolute shitshow and he’s more than glad to finally be home.
His relief only lasts for about five minutes though because before he even gets to change out of his work clothes, his phone rings.
The caller ID tells him that it’s Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng pinches the bridge of his nose.
He knows how this is going to go and while he doesn’t want to have a fight right after what happened at work, he also knows that Wei Wuxian is going to call him again and again until he finally picks up.
And Jiang Cheng decides it’s best to get this over with as quickly as possible, so he can enjoy the rest of his evening in peace.
“What?” he snaps out as he picks up.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Wei Wuxian starts with and suddenly Jiang Cheng feels tired.
So very tired.
He doesn’t say anything but of course Wei Wuxian has enough to say for both of them.
“Uncle Fengmian called and said you lost it at work today? How can you just yell at everyone and then leave? He said you dragged my project through the mud and it won’t be ready to launch, Jiang Cheng, what the fuck.”
“That’s not how it happened,” Jiang Cheng says, but he knows how this is going to go.
It doesn’t really matter what he says, as long as Jiang Fengmian said something different Wei Wuxian is not going to listen to him.
Still, like always, Jiang Cheng feels like he has to try. Somehow there’s still this grain of hope in him that one day Wei Wuxian will listen to him instead of Jiang Fengmian.
“You fucked up your calculations and I was just telling him about that. Instead of listening to me and finding a solution—which I also presented, because apparently I am the one to clean up all your messes—he yelled at me in front of the entire department and then told me to leave early. Early,” Jiang Cheng scoffs. “I was already well into over-time at that point, not that it matters.”
He knows he’s focusing on the entirely wrong thing here, but it annoys him to no end that his father seems to think that he works the same hours as Wei Wuxian. Which means he comes in late and leaves early which is not at all true.
More often than not Jiang Cheng comes in early and leaves late, but it doesn’t seem to matter. Sometimes he wonders if his father would even notice if he didn’t show up at all.
“That’s not what I heard,” Wei Wuxian says and Jiang Cheng can just imagine the pout on his face.
“Yeah, well, it’s what happened,” Jiang Cheng snaps out because he is so goddamn tired of this. “Now, if you could get your goddamn mess fixed then the project can launch like we planned.”
“No need to take such an attitude,” Wei Wuxian says and he sounds so much like Jiang Fengmian that Jiang Cheng has to fight the urge to throw his phone against the wall.
“You’d have an attitude, too, if you got yelled at in front of all your co-workers,” Jiang Cheng tells him.
“Maybe it was deserved,” Wei Wuxian mutters and something in Jiang Cheng simply shuts down.
“Good-bye, Wei Wuxian,” he mechanically says and hangs up before Wei Wuxian can say something else.
He already got yelled at by one family member today. He doesn’t have it in him to pick a fight with another.
Jiang Cheng is just setting his phone to silent when Nie Mingjue calls him.
Just the sight of his name warms Jiang Cheng and he picks the call up without hesitation.
“Mingjue, hey,” he greets him but he knows he’s not going to like what the other man has to say when he takes just a beat too long to respond.
“Wanyin, hello.” Nie Mingjue sounds tired and Jiang Cheng knows where this is going to lead.
He’s going to cancel on their movie night, and it’s not like Jiang Cheng is going to argue with him. Especially not today.
“Listen, work dragged on for longer than I wanted to, I’m still in the office, actually. Can we skip this week?”
“Sure,” Jiang Cheng says, very careful to keep his voice light. “Not a problem at all.”
There’s another brief pause on Nie Mingjue’s side.
“Is everything okay?”
“Of course it is,” Jiang Cheng straight up lies to him. “Why wouldn’t it be?”
“Just checking,” Nie Mingjue gives back. “You’re not mad, are you??”
“I’m not mad,” Jiang Cheng says. Just disappointed and hurt and tired and now missing the only good thing that happens to me once a week, he doesn’t say. “Honestly, I’m fine.”
“Alright, if you’re sure.” Nie Mingjue doesn’t sound completely convinced but of course he doesn’t push.
Sometimes, Jiang Cheng finds himself wanting him to, though. Not that he’s ever going to tell Nie Mingjue that.
“Next week then?”
“Next week,” Nie Mingjue agrees and Jiang Cheng nods, pretending that his eyes don’t burn.
“See you then, Mingjue.” He hangs up before Nie Mingjue can respond but Jiang Cheng is sure that if he has to say one more word his voice is going to break and that’s not something he wants.
But with the call done, that leaves him with nothing to do.
Nie Mingjue coming over for their weekly movie night was the only thing that made this day somewhat bearable and Jiang Cheng feels adrift now.
He goes through the motions of changing out of his clothes, but he can’t even bring himself to shower, so he simply puts on his sleeping clothes before curling up on the couch. He knows he could still watch a movie—no one is going to stop him after all—but it doesn’t feel right without Nie Mingjue.
Jiang Cheng spaces out, staring into nothing for a good while before a knock on his door startles him out of his thoughts.
Jiang Cheng freezes in fear, half-expecting it to be Wei Wuxian who came over to finish their fight in person but when no one starts to make a ruckus on the other side of the door, Jiang Cheng drags himself off the couch.
Wei Wuxian would have started to yell and shout for him like two minutes ago, so it must be someone else.
“Hello?” Jiang Cheng tentatively asks through the door and he was not prepared for the answer he gets.
“Wanyin, it’s me,” Nie Mingjue says, making Jiang Cheng gape in surprise.
“You said you don’t have time today,” he says as he opens the door only to come face to face with Nie Mingjue, who is still in his work suit.
He must have come over straight from his office.
“What are you doing here?” Jiang Cheng bites out but Nie Mingjue doesn’t rise to his temper.
“Can I come in?” he asks instead and Jiang Cheng has half a mind to tell him no, but of course he would never do that, so he simply steps aside and opens the door wider.
“Thank you,” Nie Mingjue says and toes off his shoes before he ventures deeper into the apartment, clearly feeling right at home.
Jiang Cheng valiantly tries not to let that get to him.
“Why are you here? You said you don’t have time today,” Jiang Cheng says and he knows how he sounds—rude and accusing, when all he really wants to do is cry and spend an evening with Nie Mingjue on the couch.
“Yes, and you said you are fine, but your voice didn’t match the words you said. So I thought I’d stop by to see what’s going on.”
“Nothing is going on,” Jiang Cheng says, bristling at the fact that Nie Mingjue picked up on that.
He always tries so very hard not to let Nie Mingjue see how fucked up he is and to hear that it’s not even working that well makes Jiang Cheng almost hate himself.
Nie Mingjue has enough on his plate. He doesn’t need to deal with the unfiltered mess that Jiang Cheng is as well.
“Something is,” Nie Mingjue shoots back. “And I’m here,” he says as he sits down on the couch and Jiang Cheng feels so goddamn helpless against him that he turns around and walks off to the kitchen.
His eyes are burning again and he’s torn between hitting something and curling up into a ball and cry but before Jiang Cheng can make a decision he hears Nie Mingjue coming after him.
Jiang Cheng is about to turn around, another blatant lie on his lips, when Nie Mingjue hugs him from behind, making Jiang Cheng freeze in surprise.
“My heart, why are you always hiding from me? Why are you so reluctant to let me love you just the way you are?”
Nie Mingjue sounds pained as he says it and Jiang Cheng never wanted this. He never wanted to let Nie Mingjue know about his feelings, to make him deal with all of this when he deserves so much better.
“Because there’s nothing to love,” Jiang Cheng snaps out and breaks out of Nie Mingjue’s arms, putting some distance between them and trying to get his composure back. “There’s nothing for you to love.”
It’s what he has been telling himself for months now; he is so fucked up, and his family is as well, why would anyone—and least of all Nie Mingjue—ever want him.
There is nothing loveable about Jiang Cheng.
“We seem to have very different opinions about that, then,” Nie Mingjue mildly says and he doesn’t move away, doesn’t allow Jiang Cheng to get the space he so desperately needs right now. “Because I love you just fine.”
“No,” Jiang Cheng whispers, “you can’t. I’ll—I have ruined everyone’s life. I refuse to ruin yours.”
“That’s not true,” Nie Mingjue vehemently says. “You have ruined nothing!”
“Ha, right,” Jiang Cheng scoffs. “My parent’s marriage is in shambles, both my parents hate me for different reasons, Wei Wuxian can barely stand me, a-jie likes Wei Wuxian way better but feels obligated to give attention to me too and you—at least you can still walk away.”
Nie Mingjue narrows his eyes at him.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Only the gods know why you’re spending time with me in the first place but you’re not bound to me, by nothing. You can simply walk away if I get too much. And you should, really,” Jiang Cheng tells him, because Nie Mingjue really should.
Jiang Cheng can still not understand how Nie Mingjue hasn’t run yet, but he’s not going to make him feel obligated to stay by dumping his stupid, useless feelings on him.
“Is that why you have never said anything? Is that where your reluctance comes from?” Nie Mingjue walks up to him, crowding him against the kitchen counter. “Because let me tell you, it’s already too late. I love you. I am already not going to walk away, so I don’t understand why you are denying both of us this.”
“Because you deserve better!” Jiang Cheng yells at him and tries to push past him but Nie Mingjue doesn’t let him.
“No. I decide if I deserve better or not, and I have decided that I deserve you. So why won’t you let me love you?”
Jiang Cheng opens his mouth to argue with him again but he finds that he’s tired. He is so, so tired and he doesn’t have any more arguments in face of Nie Mingjue’s steady reassurance and Jiang Cheng thinks that maybe once he can have what he really wants.
So instead of arguing further, he slumps forward, resting his head against Nie Mingjue’s collarbone.
“I don’t want to burden you,” Jiang Cheng whispers because that is one of his biggest fears, that he’s going to unload all of his bullshit on Nie Mingjue only for him to feel pressured by it.
To feel tied down when Jiang Cheng only wants to have him happy and free.
“You’re not burdening me,” Nie Mingjue softly replies and hugs Jiang Cheng close. “You’re relying on me and that is perfectly fine. It’s something I want you to do.”
Jiang Cheng lets out a shuddering breath at Nie Mingjue’s words and slings his arms around Nie Mingjue’s middle.
“I want to as well,” he admits. “I’m just scared.”
Scared that eventually Nie Mingjue will be like Wei Wuxian or even his own father, filled with more resentment towards him than anything else. Jiang Cheng isn’t sure he could stand that.
“I know,” Nie Mingjue mutters as he presses a kiss to Jiang Cheng’s head. “But I’m here. And I love you.”
“I love you, too,” Jiang Cheng finally allows himself to say and Nie Mingjue squeezes him a bit tighter.
“See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” Nie Mingjue asks but he doesn’t allow Jiang Cheng to give an answer and maybe that’s for the best because for Jiang Cheng that was one of the hardest things he ever did. “Now tell me what’s going on,” Nie Mingjue then says and carefully drags Jiang Cheng over to the couch but Jiang Cheng mulishly drags his feet.
“No. You’re still wearing work clothes. That’s not comfortable,” he says and pushes Nie Mingjue towards his bedroom. “You need comfy clothes.”
“Or otherwise cuddling is not comfortable, right?” Nie Mingjue asks with a wink and kisses Jiang Cheng’s cheekbone before he can say something. “Alright, I’ll go change. I still remember where the things are, you can wait on the couch.”
“Rude,” Jiang Cheng mutters under his breath but he does obediently walk off and now he finally allows the warm feeling that Nie Mingjue feeling almost at home here inspires in him to fill him whole.
Jiang Cheng is curled up under the blanket when Nie Mingjue comes back and Jiang Cheng’s heart thumbs heavily in his chest when he sees Nie Mingjue looking that cosy.
Nie Mingjue wordlessly sits down on the couch as well and before Jiang Cheng can feel self-conscious about what to do now, Nie Mingjue leans back against the arm-rest and pulls Jiang Cheng on top of him, securing the blanket around them.
“And now tell me about your day,” Nie Mingjue mumbles as he cards his fingers through Jiang Cheng’s hair.
“I think I want you to tell me about your day,” Jiang Cheng replies and Nie Mingjue chuckles under him.
“Fine. And because this is a mutual thing, you’re going to tell me about yours after,” he decides and before Jiang Cheng can say something to that, he starts to talk.
Jiang Cheng finds that he loves this very much and even when it’s his turn to talk about his day, he doesn’t feel too bad about it anymore. It’s very hard to feel bad about anything when he’s laying on top of Nie Mingjue like that.
And he especially can’t feel bad now that he knows his feelings are reciprocated.
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This was lovingly titled “Yet another mafia au” in my WIPs ;)
Nie Mingjue shifts nervously in his seat when Sandu Shengshou continues to tap out a rhythm on his biceps and it earns him a disapproving glare of Nie Huaisang.
Nie Mingjue helplessly shrugs but he knows Nie Huaisang is not having it when he flicks open his fan, expertly hiding his mouth behind it.
“Get a grip on yourself,” he hisses and Nie Mingjue wishes he could, but then his eyes fall back to Sandu Shengshou and he knows it’s a lost cause.
It’s not his fault that the other man is so hot, despite his mask. Or maybe because of it, Nie Mingjue is still not sure about it.
He shifts again and this time he doesn’t just earn himself a glare from Nie Huaisang. Sandu Shengshou’s eyes also fall to him and Nie Mingjue can just imagine him raising an eyebrow at him.
Nie Mingjue hurriedly avoids his eyes, and stares down at the table in front of him. It might be safer than to continue staring at Sangu Shengshou’s graceful hands.
Gods, Nie Mingjue really is in deep and he doesn’t even know the identity of Sandu Shengshou.
“You’re an embarrassment,” Nie Huaisang tonelessly tells him and it’s not like Nie Mingjue has anything to say to that in his defence.
He has seen Sandu Shengshou fight, with his whip and his sword and even his bare fists, and Nie Mingjue has never seen anything like it.
Just the thought of the last fight he witnessed makes his mouth go dry.
In all honesty, Nie Mingjue is kind of offended that no one else seems to be head over heels for the other man, secret identity or not. Everyone should be falling over themselves for Sandu Shengshou.
“I’m gonna snitch to Jiang Cheng on you,” Nie Huaisang hisses and that, finally, gets Nie Mingjue to get a grip on himself.
His feelings for Jiang Cheng are a little bit differently than those for Sandu Shengshou, because while he wouldn’t mind for Sandu Shengshou to pin him against a wall and kiss him breathless, all Nie Mingjue wants to do to Jiang Cheng is to bundle him up and protect him from every single bad thing in the world.
And maybe drop a hundred kisses on him in the process as well.
“Shut up,” Nie Mingjue finally mutters back, tuning back in to the discussion taking place right now.
It’s an emergency meeting so Nie Mingjue really should be paying attention, but really, with Sandu Shengshou right there, it’s kind of hard.
“The Wen’s are getting bolder,” Lan Qiren states just as Nie Mingjue tunes back in and everyone in the group nods.
Their attacks have gotten much more recent lately and every Sect suffered some attacks from them. Except the Jin, and that in itself is more than worrying and the only reason no representative of the Jin Sect is at the meeting.
If they all unite against the Wens the might have a chance, but if the Jin’s should stab them in the back it might be hard to come out on top.
“They made an attempt on Wanyin’s life last week,” Yu Ziyuan says into the room and Nie Mingjue stiffens.
“They did what?” he hisses. “How is he?”
“Please,” Sandu Shengshou drawls out, lazily turning the ring on his finger, reminding everyone in the room that Zidian is always just a flick of his hand away.
“Right,” Nie Mingjue mutters, something hot and heavy swirling in his stomach at the self-assured way Sandu Shengshou speaks.
Of course nothing would happen to Jiang Cheng with Sandu Shengshou guarding his every step.
Nie Mingjue gets the distinct impression that Sandu Shengshou is smirking at him from behind his mask and it’s not helping when Nie Huaisang rolls his eyes at him as well.
Nie Mingjue decides to simply not look up during this meeting again. Nie Huaisang can handle everything, he’s sure of that.
His heart still stumbles every time Sandu Shengshou’s dry voice contributes a biting remark to the discussion.
~*~*~
Nie Mingjue still thinks it’s a great honour that Jiang Cheng is allowed to be at his place without Sandu Shengshou’s constant supervision even though Jiang Cheng has been coming over for years now.
He’s not entirely sure how he and Jiang Cheng got so close—or why Yu Ziyuan allows her vulnerable son to spend time at another Sect Leader’s home—but Nie Mingjue is not going to question it.
It’s not as if he would ever betray the trust that is placed in him.
“Do you have ice cream?” Jiang Cheng asks from the couch, where he’s curled up under a blanket, wearing soft lounging clothes.
Nie Mingjue feels a little bit like dying just looking at him.
“Of course I do,” he says instead of going over and dropping a kiss to Jiang Cheng’s forehead and flees to the kitchen.
Nie Huaisang is giving him his most judgemental stare when he passes him and Nie Mingjue doesn’t even have anything to say for himself.
Yes, he’s a mess and he knows it. He doesn’t need his brother to point it out, though.
“Shut up,” he hisses when he comes back with the ice cream and Nie Huaisang valiantly tries not to laugh at him.
“I didn’t even say anything.”
“But you wanted to and I don’t appreciate it.”
“Mingjue? Everything okay?” Jiang Cheng calls from the living-room and Nie Mingjue decides to go there rather than have the same conversation with his brother again.
Nie Huaisang has been on his case ever since Jiang Cheng came over the first time, but Nie Mingjue is very adamant that it has to be Jiang Cheng’s decision.
Nie Mingjue is Sect Leader and if he makes advances then it could put Jiang Cheng into a difficult position, politically speaking.
And he definitely doesn’t want to do that.
Plus, Nie Mingjue can’t quite get Sandu Shengshou out of his mind and before he hasn’t sorted through that mess he will most definitely not do anything to either of them.
Not that they would even want him to but that’s a whole other mess to deal with.
“Here,” Nie Mingjue says and gives Jiang Cheng his requested ice cream.
Jiang Cheng smiles at him, open and unguarded, and not for the first time Nie Mingjue wonders how he so thoroughly escaped being trained as the Sect heir. Both Yu Ziyuan and Sandu Shengshou have made it perfectly clear that Jiang Cheng has not received any fight training and that he is to be protected at all costs.
Nie Mingjue doesn’t mind protecting him, but he still worries, even knowing that Sandu Shengshou is usually always there. There are a lot of things that can happen to Jiang Cheng and the fact that apparently he can’t even defend himself should he be attacked—that thought caused Nie Mingjue to stay awake more than one night already.
Sometimes Nie Mingjue suspects that Jiang Cheng is simply lying to everyone, but his body language supports the no training story. He always carries himself relaxed and open and Nie Mingjue is not above admitting that he tried to test Jiang Cheng more than once already, but nothing ever happened.
No instincts kicked in and Jiang Cheng doesn’t seem to have any reflexes that would allude to some formal training.
Nie Mingjue just hopes that Sandu Shengshou and he can keep him safe, always.
“Did you decide on a movie?” Nie Mingjue asks as he sits down as well and he smiles softly when Jiang Cheng readily shares his blanket with him.
“Yeah,” Jiang Cheng says and presses play without even waiting for Nie Huaisang.
“Huaisang?” Nie Mingjue calls back over his shoulder but instead of getting a verbal answer Nie Huaisang shows up in the doorway and motions for him to get back.
His serious face spells trouble.
“Hold this for a second would you?” Nie Mingjue asks and hands Jiang Cheng his bowl of ice cream before he stands up and walks into the kitchen.
“What’s wrong?” he whispers and Nie Huaisang checks that Jiang Cheng is looking at the screen and not listening in to them.
Nie Mingjue’s stomach falls with worry.
“Disaster struck,” Nie Huaisang says, working his jaw. “The Wens are attacking Lotus Pier. First reports say Wen Xu and Wen Chao are leading the assault.”
“What?” Nie Mingjue hisses, quickly checking that Jiang Cheng is still safe and sound on his couch. “What are their chances?”
Nie Huaisang gives him a pitying look because they both know that if Wen Ruohan decides he wants the Jiang Sect to be eradicated then it will happen.
“We have to keep Wanyin here and we have to keep him safe,” Nie Mingjue mutters and as if he has heard him, Jiang Cheng’s voice rings out.
“Is everything okay?” he asks, and when Nie Mingjue turns back around he sees that Jiang Cheng abandoned the couch and the ice cream in favour of coming to them in the kitchen.
He looks soft and vulnerable with his oversized sweater and Nie Mingjue cannot bear the thought that anything should happen to him.
Before Nie Mingjue can come up with a lie, Nie Huaisang moved, almost too fast for the eye to track and he knocks Jiang Cheng clean out.
Between one blink and the next, Jiang Cheng is on the ground, safely cushioned in Nie Huaisang’s arms.
“What are you doing?” Nie Mingjue demands to know, rushing towards them to check that Nie Huaisang didn’t seriously hurt Jiang Cheng.
“He can’t know, not now. He would want to go and you know he wouldn’t be able to help. There’s nothing he can do. This is better.”
Nie Mingjue wants to argue, but he knows Jiang Cheng. Should he find out that his home is under attack, he would want to go there, his own safety be damned and Nie Huaisang is right.
They can’t let that happen.
“I still don’t like it,” Nie Mingjue mutters and Nie Huaisang shrugs, unrepentant.
“Noted. Now help me get him on the couch,” he says and together they lay Jiang Cheng out on the couch.
“What are we going to do?” Nie Mingjue asks once that’s done and Nie Huaisang worries his lower lip.
“I doubt there’s anything we can do. If we send our full force to help, we might get wiped out as well without a fighting chance. We should coordinate with the Lans.”
“You want to sacrifice the Jiang Sect,” Nie Mingjue says and while he doesn’t like it, Nie Huaisang is right.
They don’t know what the Lans are doing, but rushing in there to safe Lotus Pier might just be the stupidest idea.
“Some of them will make it out,” Nie Huaisang says. “They have Sandu Shengshou, Wei Wuxian and Madam Yu. I doubt they will be completely wiped out. We should prepare shelter and first aid for them and then plan once we know how many survived.”
“I don’t like it,” Nie Mingjue mutters as he drags a hand over his face.
“But,” Nie Huaisang prompts.
“But you’re right,” Nie Mingjue admits. Â
They settle in for a long wait, but it’s barely an hour later when news reach them that Lotus Pier is burning.
Nie Mingjue can only hope that some people made it out before that, but knowing the Wens, they made sure that no one could flee.
Nie Mingjue is just about to check on Jiang Cheng when he suddenly walks into the kitchen, massaging his neck.
“You little fucker,” Jiang Cheng says to Nie Huaisang, who freezes at the table, the report about Lotus Pier burning still open on his tablet.
“Wanyin?” Nie Mingjue carefully asks because gone is the soft, vulnerable Jiang Cheng.
This Jiang Cheng is holding himself straight and tall and if Nie Mingjue wouldn’t know better he’d says he’s looking at a fighter.
“Why the hell did you knock me out?” he asks as he crosses his arms in front of his chest.
Nie Huaisang opens his mouth to come up with a bullshit lie, but Nie Mingjue’s gaze gets caught on Jiang Cheng’s finger, that is tapping out a rhythm on his biceps.
“Sandu Shengshou?” he asks, unsure about his own observation but every doubt is wiped out when Jiang Cheng gives him a wolfish smile.
“Took you long enough,” he says and now Nie Mingjue can see—and hear—it.
He wonders how he could ever be this blind.
“What the fuck,” Nie Huaisang mutters from his side while Nie Mingjue cannot take his eyes off Jiang Cheng.
“I love you,” Nie Mingjue says, because now that he knows Sandu Shengshou and Jiang Cheng are one and the same there’s no reason to hold that back anymore and Jiang Cheng frowns at him.
“Until a minute ago you didn’t even really know me,” he argues but Nie Mingjue simply shrugs.
“Maybe. But I am half in love with Jiang Cheng and I am half in love with Sandu Shengshou. That means I’m completely in love with you, it seems.”
“That’s the corniest shit I have ever heard,” Nie Huaisang mutters.
Nie Mingjue wants to argue that point because he has heard Nie Huaisang wax poetic about Mo Xuanyu’s everything but before he can do so, Jiang Cheng strides up to Nie Mingjue and kisses the words right out of him.
Nie Huaisang gags slightly.
“And I can’t believe it fucking worked.”
“Now tell me what is going on,” Jiang Cheng demands once he ends the kiss and Nie Mingjue is still too surprised to find his words so Nie Huaisang answers him.
“The Wens attacked Lotus Pier,” he says with a wince and Nie Mingjue notices with a start that the Jiang’s chances are almost halved, without Sandu Shengshou in their home instead of him being at Lotus Pier.
“I’m sorry,” Nie Mingjue says as he reaches for Jiang Cheng’s hand.
“Who marched into Lotus Pier?” Jiang Cheng demands to know and Nie Mingjue thinks he doesn’t seem as panicked as he might should be.
“They say Wen Xu and Wen Chao,” Nie Mingjue tells him and Jiang Cheng gives him another wolfish grin.
“Then Wen Ruohan no longer has sons. They are both dead.”
“Wanyin, you aren’t there. You don’t know how bad it is. And they are missing Sandu Shengshou. They are missing you.”
“That doesn’t matter,” Jiang Cheng waves off. “Every single member of my Sect is incredibly competent. They are the best.”
“But you—”
“I am exceptional but that doesn’t take away from them.”
Jiang Cheng says it nonchalantly, as if that’s the single truth his entire life is built upon. He is exceptional.
Nie Mingjue is incredibly turned on by his confidence.
“Ugh, da-ge, please,” Nie Huaisang mutters and Nie Mingjue can feel himself flush.
Jiang Cheng doesn’t seem to mind though, because he leans in and kisses Nie Mingjue’s cheek.
“We build Lotus Pier fireproof. It seemed like the safer option given the Wens favourite medium. If it burned down, it’s because we designed it so.”
Nie Mingjue wants to argue but just in that moment Jiang Cheng’s phone rings and he flashes a reassuring smile at Nie Mingjue.
“Wei Wuxian,” he greets as he picks up and he immediately puts the call on speaker.
“Where the hell are you? We need you here,” Wei Wuxian immediately complaints and Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes.
“They don’t need me,” he whispers to Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang and then to the phone he says “You can thank Huaisang. He knocked me clean out.”
“He got you? That’s weak, A-Cheng.”
“It’s not like I was expecting to be assaulted by him,” Jiang Cheng haughtily gives back. “How many dead?” he then asks and Nie Mingjue braces himself for the answer.
“All of them, what do you take us for?” Wei Wuxian immediately says and Nie Mingjue frowns.
He sounds way too happy for that to mean that all of the Jiang disciples are dead. Could it be—all of the Wens?
Nie Mingjue and Nie Huaisang share a surprised look.
“And how many injured?” Jiang Cheng asks next.
“Fourth shidi burned himself when he started the fire. Madam Yu broke a nail with her sword. She threatens to take Zidian back should you be missing next time.”
“Yeah, well, tell her to take that up with Mingjue,” Jiang Cheng says, rolling his eyes, as he twists a ring on his finger.
Nie Mingjue wonders what kind of spell he uses to disguise Zidian like that but Wei Wuxian’s next words have him pay attention.
“Mingjue, huh? I’ll be sure to pass that on to her. She’ll be delighted to have a talk with him.”
Nie Mingjue’s eyes go wide at that, because Madam Yu is no one to take lightly and if she should have any objections to his intention of courting Jiang Cheng, then they’ll have a problem.
“Right,” Jiang Cheng huffs out. “She owes you money now, doesn’t she? You and your stupid bets,” he says and rolls his eyes again. “I told her it wouldn’t take him another month to confess.”
Nie Mingjue is unsure if he should be offended that there were bets placed in the first place or if he should be happy that Jiang Cheng had some kind of faith in him.
“Anyway. I’ll meet you guys later, alright. I have to make sure Mingjue doesn’t die of confusion now,” Jiang Cheng says, his eyes now firmly fixed on Nie Mingjue.
“Ugh, you mean of blue balls,” Wei Wuxian mutters and Jiang Cheng unrepentantly cuts him off by ending the phone call.
“What the fuck,” Nie Huaisang mutters and Nie Mingjue can only nod.
What the fuck indeed.
“I told you,” Jiang Cheng says with a shrug and then sends an apologetic look at Nie Huaisang. “I think you should go now. Wei Wuxian sent you the address where we will meet, maybe you should go ahead,” he tells him as he practically climbs into Nie Mingjue’s lap.
Nie Huaisang almost topples his chair over, he gets up so fast.
“Yes, I should do that,” Nie Huaisang agrees and flees the kitchen as fast as he can.
“So, surprise?” Jiang Cheng says, grinningly cheekily at Nie Mingjue as he puts his arms over his shoulders.
“Surprise,” Nie Mingjue agrees, resting his hands on Jiang Cheng’s waist.
“A good one, I hope?”
“Oh, my heart,” Nie Mingjue says, sliding his hands under Jiang Cheng’s ass to support him as he stands up. “The best one.”
Jiang Cheng laughs, open and free, before he leans back in for a scorching kiss. Nie Mingjue thinks strategizing can wait a bit longer.
There are other things he intends to do first, now that he has Jiang Cheng—Sandu Shengshou—in his hands.
Nie Mingjue is very proud of the control he has. Without it Baxia would go rampant every other day, Nie Mingjue knows it, but his control also comes in handy in different life situations.
He hasn’t strangled Jin Guangshan yet, nor Jin Guangyao, and Nie Mingjue thinks that’s deserving of some pride.
He hates the moments when he loses his control, mostly during qi deviations, but he knows that those instances are completely out of his control, so he doesn’t beat himself up over it.
Right now, though, he doesn’t have an excuse.
There is no explanation for why he stepped forward and kissed Jiang Cheng. Why he is still kissing Jiang Cheng.
Nie Mingjue has lost complete and utter control over himself and he can’t even find it in him to stop. Instead he kisses Jiang Cheng again and again, like he has wanted to do for so long.
He only stops when Jiang Cheng makes a sound in his throat that feels like a bucket of cold water has been upended over Nie Mingjue. He wrenches himself away from Jiang Cheng—and it’s harder than it has any right to be—and the implication of what he did hits him full force.
He just kissed Jiang Cheng.
“I—” he starts, though he’s not sure what he’s going to say, so he trails off.
Nie Mingjue is still searching for words when Jiang Cheng blinks once, twice and then simply turns around on his heels and leaves the room.
The regret that slams into Nie Mingjue is instant and it’s enough to almost send him to his knees.
“What have I done?” he whispers to himself and he can’t believe he just lost control of himself like that.
He has always been so proud of himself that he never hurt anyone yet, not even during his qi deviations, and now he hurt the only person he truly cares about beyond Nie Huaisang and Lan Xichen.
He just took something from Jiang Cheng and going by his response it was not freely given.
Nie Mingjue wants to hit something, wants to slam his fist into the next wall, and only the thought that he has already hurt Jiang Cheng beyond belief with his actions stops him.
It wouldn’t do to hurt Jiang Cheng’s home as well.
Nie Mingjue scrubs a hand over his face, the regret still putting a sour taste on his tongue, and he wonders where they will go from here.
It’s clear to him that he just lost Jiang Cheng—and rightfully so, with what he did—and the thought makes his heart stumble painfully.
Nie Mingjue has been in love with Jiang Cheng since the Sunshot Campaign and he doesn’t understand how he could lose control like this after all this time. There is no excuse for it; it’s not his first visit to Lotus Pier, it’s not the first time he has been alone with Jiang Cheng and it’s certainly not the first time Jiang Cheng smiled at him.
There is simply no good explanation for it, and Nie Mingjue feels like that only makes it worse. There wasn’t even a trigger and that means he can never trust himself again.
“Zongzhu, I—” a disciple suddenly says as she steps into the room, but she falls silent when she sees that Jiang Cheng is no longer there. “Where is Jiang-zongzhu?” she asks, her eyes already narrowed at Nie Mingjue.
“He left,” Nie Mingjue rasps out and then bows to her. “Please tell him that I’m—” he wants to say sorry but it doesn’t feel like enough, doesn’t feel like it could even begin to put everything right.
“I will take my leave,” Nie Mingjue says instead. “Please reassure him that I will not return unless he asks me to.”
It feels like the least he can do, to stay away from Jiang Cheng until the other man wants to see him again, if that case should ever happen.
“What did you do?” the disciple asks, her voice noticeably colder and Nie Mingjue shrugs helplessly.
“Something I shouldn’t have,” he finally whispers and he was not prepared for how fast she suddenly moves, but the next thing he knows, her sword is at his throat.
“Did you hurt him?” she asks, her voice dangerously low and Nie Mingjue keeps himself completely still.
“I think so, yes,” he mumbles, afraid to speak too loudly in case the movement makes her sword bite into his throat.
“Then you will leave,” she tells him, almost sweetly now, and Nie Mingjue has to admit that he hasn’t been this afraid of someone in ages.
He absolutely believes that she is going to kill him should she find out what he did to Jiang Cheng.
“You will leave and you will stay the hell away from him. And if you don’t, if you show your face here again, if you dare to hurt him again, you will be a dead man.”
Nie Mingjue swallows at her words, and just like he thought her sword bites into his throat. The pain is minimal but it’s the least he deserves.
“Understood,” he gets out and despite everything he is beyond glad to see that Jiang Cheng has good people at his side.
“Then scram,” she tells him, finally taking the sword away from his throat and Nie Mingjue should be offended by her behaviour but instead he bows deeply to her.
“If you think he wants to hear it, tell him I’m sorry, please,” he says, even though it’s still no excuse.
It’s not like there could ever be an excuse for kissing someone against their will.
“We’ll see about that,” she haughtily tells him, and Nie Mingjue supposes that’s the best he can hope for.
He bows to her again and just in that moment the door opens a second time and in steps Jiang Cheng.
“Zongzhu,” the disciple says, her sword still in her hand and Jiang Cheng narrows his eyes at her.
“What is going on here?”
“I am leaving,” Nie Mingjue says, not daring to come out of his bow and meet Jiang Cheng’s eyes. “Words cannot express how sorry I am,” he still forces himself to say. “Rest assured that I won’t be back until you explicitly ask me to.”
“Like hell you will,” Jiang Cheng snaps and Nie Mingjue flinches at his words.
“Zongzhu,” the disciple starts but Jiang Cheng cuts her off.
“If that is his blood on your blade, then we will talk later,” he tells her and now Nie Mingjue finally comes out of his bow.
“Please do not punish her. She was justified in her actions.”
“I doubt that,” Jiang Cheng says, his eyes falling to the no doubt shallow cut on Nie Mingjue’s throat. “Leave now.”
“I will,” Nie Mingjue says exactly at the same time the disciple says it and Jiang Cheng narrows his eyes at Nie Mingjue.
“You are going to stay,” he tells him and of course Nie Mingjue nods.
He’ll do anything Jiang Cheng says, in an attempt to make up for what he did.
“Zongzhu, Nie-zongzhu,” the disciple says but her tone is still as frosty as before.
Jiang Cheng watches her leave before he turns to Nie Mingjue.
“I’m sorry about her,” he says. “She’s my second in command and she can get a little bit overprotective.”
“No need to apologize. It’s good that you have loyal people like that,” Nie Mingjue says, unable to meet Jiang Cheng’s eyes.
He wonders if Jiang Cheng is going to yell at him, or if he’s simply going to tell him to get out and never come back but in the end it doesn’t matter. He’ll take whatever Jiang Cheng deems an appropriate punishment for his actions.
“You’re bleeding,” Jiang Cheng mutters, already reaching for a handkerchief but when he steps forward Nie Mingjue moves back.
“That’s alright,” he says. “It’s just a shallow cut, there’s no need to concern yourself with something like this, Jiang-zongzhu.”
“Mingjue, what the hell,” Jiang Cheng breathes out and moves forward so fast that Nie Mingjue doesn’t have time to step back. “Just let me clean it.”
Nie Mingjue can do nothing but obediently tilt his head back to give Jiang Cheng easier access to the wound.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me, but please rest assured that it won’t happen again,” Nie Mingjue can’t help but to say as Jiang Cheng dabs at his throat.
“Shut up,” Jiang Cheng snaps at him and Nie Mingjue snaps his mouth closed.
If Jiang Cheng doesn’t want to hear him speak then he won’t.
“Mingjue, I—”
Nie Mingjue doesn’t dare to look but he’s reasonably sure that Jiang Cheng is no longer cleaning the cut, but instead resting his hands on his chest and he doesn’t know what to think of that at all.
“I’m sorry,” Nie Mingjue whispers yet again and Jiang Cheng takes a deep breath.
“Will you stop saying that, for heaven’s sake,” Jiang Cheng groans out.
Nie Mingjue shakes his head as he takes a step back, making Jiang Cheng’s hands fall away from his chest.
“No. Never. Because I am so incredibly sorry. I never meant to—” he takes a deep breath and scrubs a hand over his face.
“I love you,” Jiang Cheng suddenly says and Nie Mingjue freezes.
“What?” he whispers and finally looks at Jiang Cheng.
It seems like now it’s Jiang Cheng who can’t meet his gaze, but Nie Mingjue is fascinated by the light blush on his cheeks and it’s a sight he surely will never tire of.
“I’ve been in love for you for a very long time,” Jiang Cheng admits, his hands nervously playing with the handkerchief. “So when you kissed me, I just—I didn’t deal well with it. I’ve wanted that for so long and I just—I didn’t know what to do with that. Leaving seemed like the safer option.”
“You love me,” Nie Mingjue repeats, his heartbeat tentatively taking up speed as the words truly sink in. “You are in love with me.”
“Stop saying it!” Jiang Cheng hisses at him, now definitely red in the face and Nie Mingjue laughs.
“Never. Say it again?”
“No,” Jiang Cheng says, sticking his chin out. “Not before I hear you say it. Or isn’t that why you kissed me?”
There’s a hint of uncertainty in his voice, and that is something that Nie Mingjue cannot allow at all.
“Of course I love you. I wouldn’t kiss you if I didn’t,” Nie Mingjue immediately reassures him, taking a step forward and pulling Jiang Cheng close with a hand on his hip. “I love you,” he whispers into the space between them and when Jiang Cheng raises his head a little bit, Nie Mingjue doesn’t hesitate.
This kiss might even be better than the first one, because at least now Nie Mingjue knows that Jiang Cheng wants it as well.
“I apologize for my second,” Jiang Cheng says when they part, his fingers drifting over Nie Mingjue’s throat again. “I’ll talk to her.”
“No need,” Nie Mingjue reassures him and captures his hand to kiss his fingers. “She thought I hurt you, so there’s nothing to hold against her. I’m glad you have her.”
“She overreacted,” Jiang Cheng sighs out.
“She thought I hurt you,” Nie Mingjue reiterates. “If I thought someone hurt you, I would have done way worse. Hell, I would have cut myself if I thought it would make it up to you.”
“But I thought I did. I thought I took something you were unwilling to give. Her reaction was mild in comparison to what I deserve for that.”
“It was willingly given,” Jiang Cheng softly says and Nie Mingjue pulls him into a hug.
“And I will forever be grateful for that,” he mumbles into Jiang Cheng’s hair, the stress and worry finally falling off him.
“If you still want to make up for it, though, you can do so with more kisses,” Jiang Cheng shyly says into his shoulder and Nie Mingjue allows himself to smile.
“I will want to make up for that for the rest of my life,” he promises Jiang Cheng and pushes Jiang Cheng just far enough away to get started on that immediately.
If kissing Jiang Cheng is his punishment, then Nie Mingjue will gladly take it. And going by the smile that curves Jiang Cheng’s lips as Nie Mingjue kisses him, he is just as glad.
It was only after morning training was complete and he’d released his disciples to cool down and meditate that Jiang Cheng made his way to his study. He had paperwork, there was always paperwork, and even though he knew his new head disciple would hound him later about eating a proper lunch he really just wanted to make a dent in it first.
There were trade agreements to review, details on farms and businesses that were still being fully rebuilt after the war, requests for night hunts… all of it very important.
He hurried a little faster, although of course as sect leader he would never break into a run, not without a real emergency. Perhaps there would be an urgent night hunt request that would require immediate attention. It was best to check right away. No point in dawdling.
When he opened the door to the study, though, the perpetual scowl melted off his face. There it was! On top of his pile of correspondence, a letter with the Nie insignia!
He slid the door shut behind him and hurried over to his desk. He picked up the letter with trembling hands and stroked a finger over the wax seal once, gently, allowing himself to imagine Nie Mingjue pressing his sign into it. He broke the seal and eagerly unfolded the letter.
There was Nie Mingjue’s firm, bold hand. The stroke of each character was as straightforward as the man himself, no extra flair and no indecisiveness. It wasn’t exactly what one would call elegant, but Jiang Cheng thought it had its own charm. Nie Mingjue never had any wasted movements.
His words were as straightforward as he was. With other correspondence, Jiang Cheng had to weigh every word, to think about subtle meanings that could be hiding behind someone’s choice of phrasing. Especially with any letters from the Jin sect. But Nie Mingjue was never subtle, at least not with Jiang Cheng. When he described how his newer recruits were doing picking up the saber, Jiang Cheng knew it wasn’t any sort of comment on the motley collection of rogue cultivators he was trying to teach the Jiang forms to. In fact, Nie Mingjue had been open in his commiseration on the struggle to adapt pre-existing cultivation methods into something that fit into the sect.
Jiang Cheng felt himself smiling as he read. The Nie forms were quite different from the Jiang forms — using a saber rather than a sword made that rather obvious — but even so he could relate. Although the Jiang sect, having been nearly completely destroyed, was almost entirely rebuilt from rogue cultivators, none of the sects had been able to avoid taking more… nontraditional recruits. Except, perhaps, the Jin sect.
Privately, Jiang Cheng hoped that the chaotic collection of formerly wandering cultivators all coming together under the Jiang sect banner would please his distant ancestor, Jiang Chi. He knew it wouldn’t have pleased his mother, and he was pretty sure nothing he did would please his father. Wei Wuxian certainly hadn’t shown any interest in helping to train the new recruits, and Wei Wuxian was the one who was supposed to understand the sect motto the most. But after all, Jiang Chi had ceased his wandering to found a sect, hadn’t he?
He shook his head and refocused on Nie Mingjue’s letter. At least the Jiang forms were already fluid and flexible. As long as his disciples had a solid cultivation base, it was all right if some of their moves weren’t quite entirely pure Jiang. After all, what mattered was successful night hunts. The Nie sect saber forms, it seemed, were less forgiving.
Of course Nie Mingjue would hardly divulge sect secrets, but Jiang Cheng knew that the connection between a Nie cultivator and their saber wasn’t the same as the connection most cultivators had with their swords. The way Nie Mingjue talked about Baxia made Jiang Cheng think more of how he felt about Zidian — a first class spiritual weapon that, sometimes, he suspected had a bit of a mind of its own. It wasn’t easy to form a connection with a spiritual weapon of that caliber. He’d had Zidian for years and still felt like they were getting to know each other.
The letter continued with some news from Qinghe. Nie Huaisang’s fan collection continued to grow, although Nie Mingjue seemed more upset by that than he usually did. Jiang Cheng felt a little niggle of concern as Nie Mingjue told him, exasperated, how Nie Huaisang was more interested in toys than cultivation.
Frowning, Jiang Cheng looked over the letter more closely. Was it his imagination, or was Nie Mingjue’s writing becoming less steady as he wrote?
The end of the letter looked more like the beginning. Perhaps Nie Mingjue was just tired, and he’d taken a rest before finishing.
And the end of the letter was the best part. Nie Mingjue was not naturally inclined to the arts and had little appreciation for beautiful things. He had spent too much of his youth growing up too quickly to step into the role of sect leader and developing his cultivation with the single-minded focus necessary to defeat Wen Ruohan. After Lotus Pier had burned Jiang Cheng had been much the same, but he at least had had a summer in Gusu at Lan Qiren’s lectures studying gentlemanly arts. But despite all that, Nie Mingjue had a bit of rough poetry in his soul, and Jiang Cheng was someone he trusted enough to show it to.
The setting sun gleams on Baxia’s edge, but there is no one to challenge me. I sip wine after training, but the jar is too large for one man. Without your company, how can I sit and watch the moon?
Jiang Cheng shook his head, cheeks pink. “Terrible,” he muttered, but he was pleased nonetheless.
There was a knock at the door and he hastily folded the letter. “Yes?”
His head disciple poked her head into the room. “Zongzhu. You have to eat, the paperwork can wait!”
“Right, right,” he muttered, getting to his feet. Her cultivation wasn’t the highest, but she could out-stubborn even him. “I’m coming.”
He’d write Nie Mingjue back later.
-
It had been months since he’d last seen Nie Mingjue. Months of writing letters back and forth as they both dealt with sect business.
But this latest letter… something was wrong.
It was like that same discordant note he’d felt in Nie Mingjue’s qi that night at Carp Tower. Something under the surface, something that came out in the way Nie Mingjue’s handwriting wasn’t quite consistent enough, the way the strokes got a little jerkier and angrier whenever he mentioned his sworn brothers or Nie Huaisang.
And that was the strangest part, really. Jiang Cheng knew that Nie Mingjue pushed his brother a lot. Nie Huaisang was his heir, after all. And Nie Huaisang had loved to complain about Nie Mingjue when they were at the Cloud Recesses together.
But Jiang Cheng thought he could tell the difference between exasperated complaints and actual anger. He’d felt enough of it himself, after all. And Nie Mingjue… he’d never really been angry with Nie Huaisang. He was strict, yes, but he also had never stopped Nie Huaisang from indulging in his hobbies, either.
He opened the box he kept all of Nie Mingjue’s letters in and spread them out over his desk. Sure enough, over time they did get angrier, the handwriting more jerky. It was subtle, but with all of them laid out next to each other Jiang Cheng could see the pattern.
He realized he was breathing very quickly and shallowly and forced himself to take a long, slow breath. Surely it wasn’t like what had happened to Wei Wuxian. Surely not. Nie Mingjue had mentioned that his sworn brothers were playing music to calm his qi.
Filled with sudden determination, he shuffled all of the letters back into the box, folding them all carefully. The Lan sect’s musical cultivation was legendary, but Jiang Cheng knew something wasn’t right. He wasn’t going to blindly trust in others’ skills, not ever again. He’d go to Qinghe to see for himself.
-
Jiang Cheng knew that arriving unannounced was impolite. He had spent the energy to fly the whole way, rather than travel by horse, and he felt windswept and exhausted. But he was sure that he couldn’t waste any time, and as he’d traveled that certainty had only grown.
“Jiang-zongzhu!” the guard at the gate exclaimed. The doors to the Unclean Realm were open and Jiang Cheng could see through to the training yard. It was just about noon and morning training appeared to be coming to an end, disciples were walking back and forth rather than swinging their sabers. “We didn’t expect you! Please wait, I’ll go and fetch—“
“Huaisang!” a thunderous voice roared, and Jiang Cheng’s heart dropped. Ignoring the spluttering guard he dashed forward, Zidian already crackling to life on his finger.
“Who cares if I can’t learn saber!” Nie Huaisang was yelling at an enraged Nie Mingjue. “Let someone else be heir!”
Oh no, Jiang Cheng thought.
There was a pile of painted fans on the ground. Nie Mingjue raised Baxia to strike.
Unthinking, Jiang Cheng lashed out with Zidian to catch Nie Mingjue’s wrist. To his shock, it actually worked, purple electricity encircling Nie Mingjue’s arm and pulling him away. Jiang Cheng didn’t know if it was the element of surprise or getting better with Zidian after more practice, but he was certain he couldn’t have actually caught Nie Mingjue like that during the Sunshot Campaign. He quickly sent qi through his clarity bell, hoping that it would have an effect.
Nie Mingjue snarled as he was pulled to face Jiang Cheng, face contorted with rage, and for an instant Jiang Cheng felt fear. Then Nie Mingjue blinked, his expression smoothed out into one of confusion, and he stopped fighting against Zidian. “Jiang Cheng?”
“Jiang Cheng?” Nie Huaisang echoed, face still wet with tears but even more shocked than Nie Mingjue. “Jiang-xiong, what are you doing here?”
Feeling certain that Nie Mingjue wasn’t about to raise Baxia again, Jiang Cheng recalled Zidian. “I came to see Nie-zongzhu,” he said. “Something in his last letter concerned me. It seemed urgent.”
Wide-eyed, Nie Mingjue sheathed Baxia and walked over. To Jiang Cheng’s surprise, right there on the training field, in front of all his disciples and his younger brother, Nie Mingjue brought up his hands to gently cup Jiang Cheng’s face.
He could feel the unease in Nie Mingjue’s qi immediately, the same discordant note as before but even stronger, and he scowled.
Nie Mingjue chuckled. “Ah, are you here to scold me?”
“Yes,” Jiang Cheng snapped. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Nie Huaisang quickly gathering up his fans. “Privately. Come on.”
Nie Mingjue leaned down to press his forehead against Jiang Cheng’s. He heaved a great sigh, but allowed Jiang Cheng to pull him towards his quarters. The disciples stared at them as they passed, and Jiang Cheng forced himself to look straight ahead, shoulders back, moving with confidence.
Their relationship wasn’t supposed to be public, but it couldn’t be helped. Jiang Cheng knew he had just barely stopped Nie Mingjue from doing something he’d truly regret. How had it come to this? Nie Mingjue had threatened to burn Nie Huaisang’s things before, but it had always been in the same way that Jiang Cheng had assured people he’d break their legs! Hadn’t it?
As soon as they were in Nie Mingjue’s rooms he sat Nie Mingjue down on the bed and felt at his pulse point. He frowned. He was no physician, but as far as he could tell, Nie Mingjue’s qi felt fine.
Gently, Nie Mingjue pried his hand away. “There’s nothing to be done, A-Cheng,” he said. “I’m sorry it’s happening so soon.”
“What’s happening?” Jiang Cheng said, chest tight with worry. “What are you talking about?”
“I thought… I thought that my sworn brothers playing for me would help, but… it seems my fate is coming sooner rather than later.”
“What fate? Speak clearly!” Jiang Cheng snapped. But he let himself be pulled into Nie Mingjue’s lap, let Nie Mingjue lean in to kiss him. After so long apart, he couldn’t resist.
There it was, again, that thing that was off in Nie Mingjue’s qi. Jiang Cheng could feel it now, in the way that Nie Mingjue’s qi blended with his own. “What is that,” he said, breaking the kiss. “That— that— it’s like something out of tune, like a fucked up clarity bell.”
“What is?” Nie Mingjue said, tilting his head to the side.
“In your qi. I can’t feel it at your pulse point — I mean, not that I’m especially skilled with taking a pulse anyway — but it’s obvious when we, well,” Jiang Cheng shrugged awkwardly. “When we kiss. When we hold each other.”
“You can sense it?” Nie Mingjue said, voice careful.
Frowning, Jiang Cheng nodded. “Yes. Is that the fate you’re talking about? Is there something wrong with your qi? Were you poisoned on a night hunt?” Jiang Cheng had found a miracle cure once, and even without Wei Wuxian, he’d find another if he had to!
“Poisoned?” Nie Mingjue said, surprised. “No, it’s the sabers. The saber spirits. They… well, the stronger your cultivation, the closer your bond with your saber. But the sabers, they feed on resentment, so…” he gave a one-shoulder shrug. “It leads to qi deviations. It’s why all the Nie sect leaders have died young. And now it’s my turn. Fuck, I need— I need to apologize to Huaisang, it’s just— I’m going to die and he can’t even learn the most basic fucking forms, and he’ll be all alone, and—”
The rage was returning to Nie Mingjue’s eyes and his grip on Jiang Cheng was tightening. Jiang Cheng could feel that discordant note getting stronger again. “No,” Jiang Cheng snapped, giving a sharp ting of his clarity bell.
“No?” Nie Mingjue asked, raising an eyebrow. “You don’t believe me?”
“I mean, no, you’re not going to die,” Jiang Cheng said firmly.
“Cheng-er—“
“Shut up. There’s something wrong, something off, and I don’t know that it is Baxia. Maybe you’re right, and that’s just how your cultivation works. But your father lived longer than this, so you’ll live at least that long! Maybe it’s no super-special Lan song, but I can tell my bell helps you. And I can tell that this helps you.” He leaned in to kiss Nie Mingjue firmly, deliberately putting his qi into the kiss.
Nie Mingjue kissed him back, and Jiang Cheng could feel that discordant note fading. He let his qi flow through Nie Mingjue, flushing through stagnant meridians, and felt a tingle at the back of his neck as Nie Mingjue’s qi flowed back through him.
Nie Mingjue broke the kiss, resting their foreheads together. “You may be right, but you can’t do this at a distance.”
“Come to Lotus Pier. Leave Huaisang in charge. It’ll be good for him to see what leading a sect is like,” Jiang Cheng said. “Just a few weeks. Give it a chance. We’ll spar and share wine by the river. Watching the lotuses will be good for you.”
“Watching the lotuses, hm,” Nie Mingjue sighed. “And if I go into a qi deviation at Lotus Pier? What then?”
“I have Zidian, and all my disciples have clarity bells,” Jiang Cheng said. “Nie Huaisang will agree once we explain it to him, I know it. Please. Let me help you.” I can’t lose another person I love without even trying to keep them.
Nie Mingjue slumped forward, looping his arms loosely around Jiang Cheng’s waist and resting his head against Jiang Cheng’s chest. “All right,” he said quietly. “All right.”
