#mikeren

Of course, Eren, being the piece of shit he is, manages to evade his friends’ clutches. Before they could even start finding him in the mass of people, he and Jean are at it again, their angry screeches and loud punches punctuating the thumping music.

Some people he doesn’t know drag him away from the horse-faced bastard, and he follows a giggling Connie sullenly to the drinks. There he manages to drown his annoyance in some more alcohol, his awareness becoming more and more hazy, until suddenly, he is in the middle of a crowd screaming in unison.

“Five! Four!”

He glances around himself, thoroughly disoriented because he is surrounded by strangers and has no fucking idea how he got here.

“Three! Two!”

A blond girl next to him catches his roving eye and smirks.

“One! Happy New Year!”

Pandemonium. People are screaming themselves hoarse, drinks are flying from their plastic cups, and suddenly, he is kissing the blond girl. The feeling is far from unpleasant, yet feels oddly wrong. He understands why when he leans back for air, looks up, and catches sight of a frozen grey gaze on him.

Fuck.

She turns away and disappears into the crowd behind her, and Eren tries to follow, but suddenly finds himself being held back.

The girl still has her arm hooked around his waist. “Leaving already?” She asks him, biting her lip in an admittedly seductive manner.

Eren takes a deep breath and gently unwraps her arm from around him. Holding her hand, he says fervently, “Look. You’re very hot, okay. Like, insanely hot. So seriously, it shouldn’t be a problem for you to find someone else.” He blinks. “Okay bye.”

She still grips his hand as he is leaving. She looks a little miffed. “And why should I find someone else? Why not you?”

He shrugs. “I’m in love with someone hotter.”

Her mouth opens in a silent, angry gasp. Eren shrugs again, rips his hand from hers, and rushes away.

He searches for what seems like hours, rapidly sobering down as more and more people turn out to be not her. He wonders if she has left the party and decides that he’ll go to her room and break her door down if he has to. He must talk to her. He has to explain.

A large digital display tells him it’s only one thirty in the morning and he is just about ready to leave himself, when he catches sight of a familiar blond head. Almost exclaiming out loud with relief, he hurries forward.

“Armin!”

“Eren? Holy shit, where have you been? Mikasa and I have been looking for so long-”

“Where is she?” He interrupts him.

“Huh?”

“Where’s Mikasa, Armin?”

Armin shrugs, and Eren realises his best friend is not sober either. “Um,” Armin says, trying to focus his glazed eyes. “She was right next to me…”

Eren slumps on a chair next to him. “Fuck. Oh god Armin, I’ve fucked up.”

Armin frowns. “I heard about your fight with Jean.”

Huh? “What? No. That’s not what I’m talking about.”

Armin’s eyes narrow. “What did you do, Eren?”

Eren runs an agitated hand through his hair. “I -fuck, Armin, I was drunk, okay, like really blown outta my mind. And I had no idea -I wasn't… it meant nothing…”

Armin’s voice is more dangerous. “What did you do, Eren?”

“You guys!” Sasha’s screech makes them both wince. “Come on, we’re all gathering at the pool.”

Eren doesn’t want to go anywhere and Armin asks for him, “Who is?”

“The 104th, who else? Come on, ohmigod just come.”

Eren’s ears perk up.”Wait, everyone?”

Sasha has hooked her arm around each of the boys’ elbows. “Yes, yes, everyone.”

Eren nudges Armin and they let themselves be steered outside, where about a dozen people wait next to the pool. He quickly runs his eyes over them… but she isn’t there.

Fuck.

Jean pointedly moves to the other side of the crowd, nursing a drink next to his jaw. Eren pointedly ignores him.

“What up y'all, first New Years together!!” Connie hollers excitedly, passing around drinks to everyone.

“We’ve known each other three years, ya bald fuck,” Ymir drawls, snuggling more cozily into Historia’s hug.

Connie flips her off casually. “I meant, this is the first time we’re all celebrating New Year’s Eve together, okay?”

“And hopefully our last!” Ymir cackles. “I for one will be glad to see the back of your head,” she gestures wildly at Reiner.

Reiner glares at her and Jean adds, “Yeah, glad we’ll be seeing the last of some people.” Eren puts his drink down and flips him off with both his hands.

Historia pushes Ymir away, clearly upset. “Guys, come on,” her childish voice somehow carries over the babble. “Tonight is supposed to be fun.”

Sasha joins in. “Yeah, come on, you guys. We’re a team.”

Marco, ever the peacemaker, says brightly, “A toast! All of us together!”

No one disagrees. Ymir already looks horrified at making Historia sad, and Jean is, as usual, instantly mollified by Marco’s voice. Eren, however, wants to protest. Everyone is not together, someone is clearly missing and he is seriously pissed that they haven’t even noticed, when Armin gasps, “There she is!”

Eren follows his gaze and he sees her, standing quietly between Bertholdt and Annie with a drink of her own. She looks as stoic as ever, but does not look at him, not once. That in itself is bad enough and makes his insides turn cold.

So he doesn’t shout and cheer with the others as they close in to clink glasses and bottles and cans together. He tries to reach her glass, but she moves away, toasting her drink with Sasha instead, even braving a hug from the girl. Clearly, she is avoiding him.

“Okay, okay,” Reiner exclaims as they all swig their drinks. “Resolutions for this year.” He points at Sasha. “Go.”

“Ooh, I want to try and get into that pastry cooking course. It’s sooo prestigious,” Sasha sighs dreamily. “If I get that diploma I could be sous-chef in a four-star by the end of the year!”

Several people wish her luck and she hugs them all. Then it’s Connie’s turn and Eren barely listens to his resolution. His eyes are on her once more, and she is still looking steadily elsewhere. He is itching to go up to her and talk, but he knows everyone would make a fuss. And eavesdrop, which is honestly worse.

Ymir says something about ‘managing to just graduate, fuck’, when she slips off the chair she was sitting on and walks away. Only Annie and Bertholdt notice, but they both say nothing. Eren looks around, sees everyone laughing and teasing Ymir, and tries to leave as adroitly as he can muster. Before he leaves though, he whispers in Armin’s ear, “Cover for me.”

Armin directs an inquiring glance at him, but seems to understand when he sees Mikasa in the distance. He nods, and Eren turns away, all focus directed on the girl in the distance. Her usual red scarf is easy to keep track of, and before long, he catches up to her.

“Hey.”

She doesn’t stop.

“Hey, Mikasa!”

She stops and he comes to stand next to her. Words fail him suddenly as he looks at her calm expression, her grey eyes still refusing to meet his.

“What is it, Eren?”

He runs a hand through his hair, still struggling for words. “You’re, um, leaving already?”

“I’m tired,” she says simply.

“Why didn’t you tell me? Or -or Armin? We’ll walk you home.”

She shrugs delicately. “You looked like you were having fun.”

Ouch. “Well, it’s not. Not without you around.”

She doesn’t say anything.

“Don’t you… don’t you want to tell us your resolution?” He asks her desperately.

“I don’t have any.”

“Oh. O-okay.” He still searching wildly for something to say. Goddammit, why is it so hard to talk to her all of a sudden?

“Do you -d’you wanna know mine?”

Mikasa looks at him, finally, finally looks at him. “What is it?”

And he is suddenly lost in her eyes. They are so deep and clear, and she is just so beautiful. He has known for months how deeply she affects him and now all he can do is stare at her. She is perfect.

Her eyebrows slant slightly. “Eren?”

“Huh?”

“Your resolution. Do you want to tell me or not.”

He blinks rapidly. His every thought process is smothered by her presence, and if he was having trouble speaking before, it is nothing compared to now. He is absolutely, completely struck dumb.

Her frown deepens. “Eren-”

He gives up on trying to say anything, and instead, does the one thing he has been meaning to do for a long time: he kisses her, straight on her mouth, cutting off her words. He is almost melting at the feel of her soft lips on his, but he doesn’t linger. A firm, fervent press of his mouth on hers and then he breaks away.

“That.” He wheezes. “That was my resolution. To tell you how I feel, and I didn’t really know what to say, and, um, sorry I forced myself on you. I didn’t mean to -I mean, I meant it, like fuck, Mikasa, I’ve wanted to do it for so long, but I-”

His rambling is cut short when she places a finger on his lips. Her cheeks are flushed but her expression is frighteningly the same.

“What about that girl?” She asks him quietly.

“I -I don’t even know who she was and it was midnight and I was drunk and I know it’s not an excuse and I’m sorry, but I really wanted that moment with you instead, honest. I really, really did, but I fucking fucked up, like I always do-”

This time she cuts him off before he is even aware of it. Her face is suddenly so close he can count her eyelashes, and then, holy fuck, she is kissing him.

And this time, he does melt, right into her strong arms, even as she does into his tight embrace. This time, they kiss slowly and deeply, lips moulding against the other, tongues twisting together, the whole world around blurring into nothingness.

When she pulls away, she stays close to him, her forehead pressed on his. “It’s still midnight somewhere, right?” She asks him softly and he opens his eyes to look at her. Her cheeks are properly red now, her lips all wet and bruised, her eyes glimmering with humour. Fuck, she is stunning.

“Mm-hmm,” he manages to agree. He realises that he will have to start getting used to being stunned speechless by her. The thought makes him giddily exhilarated.