#michael behling

I told Simone that nothing was going on between Layla and I but I just told Layla that I like her. How did nothing become something? Was something brewing between us this whole time?

For a wedding that never happened.

She was here and Simone was there. But does that mean that I want to date her or was she just a fill in when I couldn’t have the real thing?

For a wedding that never happened.

Do I actually have feelings for Layla? Or do I just think I do because we’ve gotten so close?

For a wedding that never happened.

Jordan started to pace up and down the pathway to the house.

Ok, let’s really break this down.

Were you in love with Simone? 100%.

Did you want to break up with Simone? No.

Do you want to date Layla? I don’t know.

“Ugh” Jordan groans in frustration and puts his palms over his eyes.

At that moment, Spencer is walking to the door and sees him. “Aye man, you alright?”

Startled, Jordan puts his hands down and sees his friend. “Huh? What? Oh. Yeah I’m OK.”

“You sure?“

For a wedding that never happened.

For a wedding that never happened.

“No. Can we like go for a walk or something?”

“Yeah man, I’m free” Spence says and goes to open the door.

Jordan places his hand on Spencer’s arm. “Um…let’s go around.”

“Why? We can cut through the house and get to the beach.”

“Yeah but Layla is in there.”

“Okay…and?”

“And it’s a whole thing. Kinda why I wanna take that walk.”

“Uh uh.” Spencer says while turning to walk to the side of the house. “Are we just gonna leave her alone? Like is she waiting on you to come back?”

“I don’t know man she was in there when I got home.”

Spencer looks at him with an eyebrow raised.

“She’ll be fine. She can let herself out.”

“Alright then.”

They walk to the beach in silence and start making their way down the shore. After a few minutes Jordan blurts out, “I kissed Layla.”

“Hmmm.”

“Hm? That’s all you have to say?”

“I mean, what do you want me to say bro?”

“Actual words would be nice.”

“So… you kissed Layla. How do you feel?”

“Confused.”

“About what?”

“Everything.” Jordan responds dejectedly while wiping a hand down his face.

For a wedding that never happened.

Jordan gives Spencer the entire rundown of what just happened in the kitchen.

“Ok ok. Let’s be more clear. Do you like Layla?”

“Of course, she’s one of my best friends now.”

“Aight. Are you attracted to Layla?”

“Yeah she’s pretty” Jordan shrugs.

“Do you want to be her boyfriend?”

For a wedding that never happened.

For a wedding that never happened.

“I’m not sure.”

“Hm.”

“Dude!”

Spencer shrugs, “I mean, I’m just sayin.”

“Saying what though?”

“It don’t even matter. Let’s switch it up. When you saw how close Damon and Simone were, how did that make you feel?”

“Angry. A little terrified.”

“Terrified of what?”

“Losing my future.”

“Your future?”

“Yeah.” Jordan stops and sits in a random spot on the beach facing the waves. Spencer follows suit.

“After I really got to know her, Simone and I felt…inevitable or something. When we got together I could invision our entire lives so clearly. But that’s all gone now, I guess.”

“You guess?”

“I mean who knows…maybe one day…”

“So you just kissed Layla and told her that ‘she can’t resist you’ but are still holding out hope for Simone?”

“Yeah? I mean no. I mean… I don’t know man, I told you I was confused.”

“Are you confused or do you not want to face the truth?”

For a wedding that never happened.

For a wedding that never happened.

For a wedding that never happened.

“The truth?”

“That you might not actually like Layla in a romantic way. That you might just want to force yourself to move on so you don’t feel the pain of your breakup?”

Jordan was at a loss for words.

“Bro, take it from me as someone who did have feelings for Layla before. I really liked her, she’s a great girl. But I wasn’t in love with her. I was just trying to feel better after your sister rejected me.”

“Huh.”

“And that wasn’t fair to Layla. Me and Olivia? We really hurt her. Now that she’s in a better place I would hate to see that happen again.”

For a wedding that never happened.

“The last thing I want to do is hurt Layla.”

“I didn’t want to hurt her either. But I did. By not thinking before I acted. A lot of heartbreak could’ve been avoided had I taken a moment to process my emotions.”

“Ok sensei. That yoga and meditation really has you all thoughtful and shit.” Jordan jokes while pushing Spencer’s shoulder.

“Yeah yeah. You laugh but I’ve really become better with sitting in my feelings and determining why I feel a certain way. It’s always deeper than I think it is. You know?”

“I get what you’re saying it’s just hard.”

“True. But it’s worth it. You should give it a try.”

“Maybe.” Jordan says absentmindedly.

“Rapid fire.”

“What?”

“Rapid fire questions. I want you think about the first thing that comes to mind. Ok?”

For a wedding that never happened.

“Spence…”

“Just indulge me.”

“Fine.”

“Do you think men and women can just be friends?”

“What? Yes.”

“Do you and Layla have a connection?”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Do you think you have to date everyone you have a connection with?”

Jordan looks over at Spencer with an annoyed look. “Really?”

“Rapid fire.”

He sighs, “No.”

“Are you hurt that Simone broke up with you?”

“Yes.”

“Are you ready to move on?”

“I want to be.”

“Do you think Simone and Damon are attracted to each other?”

Reluctantly Jordan answers, “Yeah.”

“Do you think Simone would have ever cheated on you?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“Would you have cheated on Simone?“

“Never.”

“Do you think Simone went back to Atlanta and asked Damon out?”

“Maybe.”

“Is it possible that your trying to force this thing with Layla because you’re afraid that Simone has moved on with Damon?”

“It’s…possible.”

“Are you still in love with Simone?”

Yes.

Jordan just stared ahead and watched the waves crash against the shore.

Spencer gets up from the ground and brushes the sand from his pants. He pats Jordan on the shoulder and leaves him to his thoughts.

For a wedding that never happened.