Cold Feet (for the first time)
Yesterday | June 10, 2025
This happened yesterday for the first time. Around midday I received a response from someone that was sort of the catalyst to my brief moment of cold feet about the trip. To be more honest, I allowed someone else's words to be the catalyst. But also, that's super difficult to hear something from someone and not let the words resonate, especially if you believed there was trust in that friendship and you trust that person.
This person basically said, "You're crazy. Anyways, back to my adult responsibilities of returning to the job I earned by working so hard for and the evening activities that if I mentioned these activities at a social gathering, I would receive head nods in agreement and praise." Almost like, "Good, good! You're fitting the mold like the rest of us."
So then that started my doubting of the whole trip. What if I run out of money because I don't have that "job" this person mentioned? What if I need something that costs extra? What if I need money for a flight? What if I need to rely on credit cards and build a bunch of debt? What if I need to purchase a U-Haul and drive back? What if? What if? What if?
So how did I get out of that cold feet moment that seemed to last days but was only 4-5 hours?
I mowed the lawn. I did something I could tangibly look at that was finished and done. A product. Then the body movement from the mowing of the lawns. Probably blood flow as well. Then after mowing the lawns, doing something related to music. Posting a video that I felt 80% was finished, but to the rest of the world might seem completely done. I just started doing.
When I started doing, I started to give more "energy" (I guess I could say) towards myself and made myself greater. But even this morning, the morning after, I sit and think that there are way more pros than cons. There are way more positive "What if?" questions than there are negative ones. At least the weight of the positive "What if?" outweighs the negative. Which makes the trip, for me, worth the effort:
What if I meet someone who discovered their passion is travel, at 65 years old? And I get even more inspired.
What if I meet someone who never made more than $50,000 per year, but at the age of 40 they started a business and retired 2 years later? And I learn even the seemingly impossible is possible?
What if I receive a free large hot coffee with 8 creamers inside, just how I like? And this tastes better than any other coffee because the morning was cold and the coffee was hot.
What if I get the opportunity of 10 lifetimes (I can't even imagine of what this might be) and I say yes? All because I got on a bike and rode.
After talking to a friend that has done this bicycle trip, she told me something that I knew but had forgotten: It's easier to put someone else down for chasing their dreams than to chase our own.
