#meta!

. LEAF! HITS PUBERTY AND WANTS TO TURN THE PAGE AND THEN BURN THE WHOLE BOOK! COINCIDENTALLY! KEVIN ABSTRACT COMPLETELY REVAMPS HIS STYLE IN 4TH SOLO ALBUM BLANKET! NOW! IS THIS ALL PART OF THE GREATER EVEREVOLVING STATE OF NATURE?! DOES FATE HAVE ANY REGARD FOR OUR DESIRES AND CONCERNS AT ALL?! AND DOES THE MOVIE MOTHER! JUST KINDA SUCK?! [HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE JAVIER BARDEM IS A POET WHEN EVERY LINE OF HIS SOUNDS LIKE IT CAME OUT OF AN ELEMENTARY SCHOOLER'S TINY SKULL?!]

. LEAF! ANNOUNCES HE'S LOOKING FORWARD TO WRITING MORE NARRATIVE FICS IN THE FUTURE! SURELY HE'S NOT COMPLETELY SACRIFICING THE SMUT FOR THAT?! THAT'S NOT WHAT WE'RE SAYING BUT IS IT ACTUALLY?!

. #NOTSPONSORED! #SERIOUSLY! #NOTANAD! AND NOW! A SEGMENT TOTALLY LIKE THE OTHERS! NOT ANY DIFFERENCE WITH ANYTHING WE USUALLY DO! JUST NEWS! NOTHING ELSE!

QUIT WHATEVER YOU'RE DOING AND GO LISTEN TO THIS ABSOLUTE MOOD OF AN ALBUM! NOW! #WESWEARWEARENOTGETTINGPAIDFORTHIS!

. LEAF!'S REMAINING KINKTOBER FICS FOUND DEAD IN THE DRAFT DUNGEON! WILL THEY COME BACK FROM THE DEAD WHENEVER LEAF! FEELS LIKE WRITING A PWP FIC OR REMAIN FORGOTTEN FOR GOOD?!

. WE JUST NOTICED AFTER AN ENTIRE MONTH OF POSTING THAT ALL OF LEAF!'S FICS HAVE THEIR TITLE IN BOLDED BECAUSE THAT'S HOW HE WRITES IT IN GOOGLE DOCS AND THEN HIS LAZY ASS JUST CTRL+C-CTRL+V'S THE ENTIRE THING WITH NO SECOND THOUGHT! WILL HE CHANGE THAT FOR AESTHETIC PURPOSES?! WILL HE LEAVE THEM LIKE THIS BECAUSE IT'S TOO MUCH OF A HASSLE?! IS THE REVIVAL OF Y2K FASHION AND VISUALS ALREADY A DEAD TREND?!

. LEAF! ANNOUNCES HE'S THINKING OF UPLOADING ALL HIS WORKS ON AO3 DESPITE THE TAGGING PROCESS BEING INCREDIBLY AND NEEDLESSLY TEDIOUS ON THAT SITE! WOULD THAT BE ANY HELPFUL FOR ANYONE?! AT ALL?! IS HE JUST GOING TO DO IT ANYWAY?!

. AND FINALLY! RUMORS OF WHAT WOULD BE A SHOCKING BREAKUP BETWEEN ADVERBS AND LEAF! WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN?!

LEAVE YOUR VERY NECESSARY AND APPRECIATED THOUGHTS DOWN IN THE COMMENTS FOR ENGAGEMENT! WE'LL MAKE SURE TO READ ALL OF THEM! THE EFFECT OF YOUR OPINIONS ON THE COURSE OF HISTORY IS WITHIN THE REALMS OF POSSIBILITY! BUT NOT GUARANTEED! UNBELEAFABLE! MORE NEWS! AT SOME POINT DOWN THE LINE!

Lasko x David

The Classic

They balance each other out, each--perhaps hypocritically--encouraging the other not to overwork

Very quiet, domestic couple (who for sure get Very Rowdy)

Speaking of which, David finds a very nice, unexpected subspace with Lasko’s gentle domming

Lasko x Milo

Tall Nerd Gets Dommed by a Guy A Foot Shorter than Him

They have a lot of fun together, Milo helping Lasko come out of his shell and Lasko introducing Milo to ever more geeky stuff

Well-Dressed Men

Milo is definitely jealous of the fact that Aggro beelines for Lasko to claim Lasko’s lap, climb his shoulders, make a nest of his hair, etc. (but Lasko assures him that he still likes Milo best)

Lasko x Asher

Oh Asher has so much fun teasing Lasko. He’s so easy to fluster

But he also loves comforting and encouraging Lasko. Asher is great at self-care and mental health days.

And They Were Both Subs (Um, Actually, they’re both switches, and it’s interesting to see how that evolves with two people who are normally more submissive, but with room to explore themselves)

Lasko is also good at comforting Asher, who, as we know, also has self-worth issues. They may or may not get into “No, you’re amazing,” matches.

Damien x David

Big Tsun and Small Tsun

They’re both set in their ways and sometimes argue about the precise amount of sugar that recipe needs, excuse you

But they’re an unstoppable force of love and protection and change when they combine their knowledge, resources, and stubbornness

Size Kink

Damien x Milo

Short Buff Kings

The sarcasm is strong with these two

So is the competitiveness. Be it field sports or Wii Sports, these two don’t hold back.

Confident guys who every now and then have doubts about their sexy bodies or short wolf legs reassuring each other

Damien x Asher

Balance!

Asher loves Damien’s fiery spirit, and Damien loves Asher’s gentle heart

I can see them having an adventurous nightlife; wandering the city, checking out clubs and little-known restaurants

Damien tries to fix Asher’s diet (and failing that, tries to help him get over his fear of ordering deliveries. Still winds up doing it for him most of the time.)

Huxley x David

Big Gentle Dudes

So much camping

I feel like Huxley helps David relax, set aside all the heavy stuff he carries as Alpha and just be in the moment

David loves getting to know the parts of Huxley he’s used to hiding. A lot of very tender talks and kisses and cuddles

Huxley x Milo

Smol Sassy and Tol Chill

Huxley will sometimes run with Milo in wolf form, and while he can’t keep up for long, Milo will run back to him and tackle him for snuggles

Milo doesn’t mind feeling small in Huxley’s arms

They have dedicated self-care/do-nothing days where they lay around the house, pampering themselves and enjoying each other

Huxley x Asher

Gym Bros Turned Boyfriends

Comfort food and digging holes and video games and chill

Asher doesn’t know how Huxley can talk so sweetly while absolutely destroying him in bed, but he’s not complaining