#merman!dan

It was yet another lonely day for Dan, swimming on his own through the coral reef he had ended up in after travelling for miles and miles to find at least some kind of home again. Dan stood out like a sore thumb among these many bright colours with his pitch black tail and manly torso. Yeah, Dan was a merman who had been left by his group due to his lacking of ‘social skills’. At least that’s what Dan’s friends had told him.

But Dan wasn’t just swimming around, trying to get the boredom out of his life. No, he was looking for someone. A human being, to be exact. He’d seen him for a few weeks now and Dan was fascinated by the way he swam. It was really something. Dressed solely in a black diving suit, wearing oxygen tanks - humans seemed to need these - some weird flippers and a mask, only revealing a bit of black hair and bright blue eyes.

It was one thing, being curious, but this really wasn’t curiosity anymore for Dan. Dan wanted to meet this human, since it was the first one he had ever seen, apart from the ones in the books that Dan and his friends had found on the ocean floor - and yes, Dan could read. But there was no way in which Dan would ever dare to come even remotely close to this human. Mermaids and mermen appeared to be something odd to humans, or so he’d noticed from the stories his friends used to tell him.

Dan’s friends. Could he even call them friends anymore? They’d left him, in the middle of the ocean, they’d left him there to die since his species of mermen used to hunt together. It was the most stressful and painful experience Dan had ever lived, and it had caused him to lose his voice. It wasn’t as if Dan didn’t want to speak, he just couldn’t anymore for some weird reason. He really was quite pathetic. Maybe it had been better for him to just die.

Shit. There he was. The human with the bright blue eyes. He was here again?! Quick, Dan needed to hide. Now! He swam over to some big rocks and hid himself behind them. The human wouldn’t be able to see him now, would he?

Dan carefully peeked from behind the rocks and quietly watched the diver as he was studying marine life - or so it seemed - and couldn’t help but wonder over this guy as he gracefully, for a human at least, swam his way through the reef. He appeared so gentle, carefully avoided any unnecessary contact with the marine life with eyes full of wonder...

Then suddenly the diver’s eyes caught Dan gazing at him and Dan almost choked. Had he seen him? Quickly he hid himself back behind the rock and pressed his back against it. Don’t make any movements or even any sounds. Please, please don’t come here, Dan wished furiously.

Slowly Dan turned his body again to move and peek out from behind the rock, but his eyes widened as he suddenly saw the face of the diver in front of from. The diver yelled, Dan could see the air bubbles rising, but Dan just stared at him wide-eyed, not saying a word - as if he even could.

Luckily Dan quickly recovered from the surprise and went to swim away already, but the diver grabbed Dan’s arm and held him back. That made Dan turn his head back to this human and made him look the diver straight in the eyes. Slowly, Dan laid his hand on his and pulled his arm back. Directly after that Dan swam away without looking back.

This was unbelievable. The guy Dan had been watching for so long, had finally noticed him. Now Dan couldn’t come back here normally. He would definitely be a target now for the diver. Since mermaids and mermen seemed to be so rare to humans. Was it even a good idea to return to this place? Shouldn’t Dan just head to somewhere else? Wasn’t it better to just leave and never come back?

No, Dan had been lonely for far too long. Maybe he should find a way to communicate with the human. Dan knew he spoke the same language, but Dan couldn’t speak. What was he going to do?

For a long time Dan kept on worrying, but eventually he made his resolve. And tomorrow he was going to carry out his plan.

***

The next day Dan was back at the coral reef and now he was looking for the mysterious diver man. He had decided he wanted to properly say hi to the human and Dan had also noticed something about the diver he could help him with. All the times that Dan had seen him, the diver had seemed to be picking up one particular type of shell and Dan happened to know a cave where there were lots of them.

So today Dan carried one of those shells with him and he had mentally prepared himself for meeting this guy. The diver seemed like a kind human being, Dan didn’t see any harm in it. He was always told to avoid humans by everyone he knew, but why?

Anyway, Dan was going to say hi and show him the cave, but nothing more. Or like, maybe he could try to communicate with him? No, Dan had set two objectives and he wasn’t going to do any more than that. After all, he still kind of cared about the warning all his friends and family had given him when he still was a part of them. Now he had no one to give him anything even remotely close to advice.

Just as Dan started to get caught up in his own thoughts again, he heard something that he’d grown to recognize more and more. The sound of the rhythmic breathing and the rising of the air bubbles that belonged to the diver. Dan frantically began searching for him and found him almost instantly. You could say what you want, but Dan’s hearing was on point.

Of course Dan immediately swam over to the guy, not wanting to lose his confidence, which was already going down more and more every passing second, but he was determined this time. He couldn’t keep dwelling over the loss of his friends - who were actually a bunch of selfish bastards, but Dan would never admit that to himself.

Then Dan reached the diver, and the diver had seen him, but didn’t seem as surprised anymore. That kind of set Dan in a easier mood and he simply waved at the human, mouthing the word ‘hi’.

The diver was shocked, to say the least, that this mermaid - or like, merman - seemed to speak his language, let alone wanted to communicate with him. He was baffled by Dan’s appearance, his black tail with four fins at the side, the fins almost transparent, and the grey scales on the sides of his arms and on parts of his chest. He wasn’t able to bring out a word.

Dan had noticed the diver’s surprise, he hadn’t expected anything else, and then offered him the shell, smiling kindly to put the human at ease. Of course Dan couldn’t see the diver’s mouth because of his mask, but he could swear he saw him smile just a little as he gratefully accepted Dan’s gift. And that was his cue.

Gently he grabbed the diver by the arm and guided him through the coral reef, to the cave Dan was thinking about bringing him earlier. It was a long swim, but for some reason the human didn’t seem to be struggling to get away from Dan. Was he curious about where Dan was taking him? Probably. But when the coral reef was getting far out of sight and they entered the more empty parts of the sea, he did seem to get worried, but a gently look from Dan immediately set him back at ease.

At last Dan and the diver came close to their destination and Dan started swimming upwards. It had been a while since Dan had been out of the water and when a soft sea breeze reached his cheeks, he slowly breathed in the fresh air and closed his eyes, enjoying it for a second. The diver on the other hand was totally flabbergasted. He quickly pulled off his mask, crawled out of the water and looked around him, gazing at the beautiful cave. The walls were blue because of the water and shimmered with all kind of sparkles because of the moving of the water.

“Wow”, the diver exclaimed, and this was the first time Dan had heard his voice, or seen his full face, and he liked it. He liked his voice, his face, how the blue light from the water reflected on his skin. Dan suddenly felt really warm inside and averted his gaze for a second. “This is beautiful. Thank you for showing me this. If you can even… understand me. Can you?”

Dan nodded and swam over the the edge, placing both of his arms crossed on the side with his head on top. The diver went back over to Dan and sat down in front of him, smiling gratefully.

“I’m Phil. Nice to meet you.”

Dan smiled and tried to mouth his name over to Phil. Phil was grateful he had taken those lip-reading classes - which were very useful when diving with more people - and seemed to understand what the merman was saying. He was really trying his best and it took both of them a while, but eventually Phil got it.

“And you’re Dan?”

Dan smiled happily and gave Phil a thumbs up. This seemed to go well. Dan actually had some company for once and was ‘talking’ to him. And Dan couldn’t even speak! What were the odds…

“How come you can’t speak?” Phil asked Dan with great interest. This merman had caught Phil’s attention ever since yesterday and had occupied Phil’s mind constantly. Dan then grabbed his throat and stuck out his tongue to show he had lost his voice, which Phil understood. “How come?”

That was something Dan couldn’t just depict with some gestures, so he just shrugged. Phil didn’t ask him any more questions about it and told Dan he was going to look around the cave with a friendly smile. Dan nodded, but didn’t know for sure if he should stay or not. Phil would probably want to find his way back again, so Dan decided to just hang around a bit as Phil walked around the cave, finally realizing he was brought here because the merman had noticed him studying these particular shells, which seemed to appear here a lot.

Phil was really grateful to this merman and was fascinated by the way this creature had noticed exactly what Phil needed. As if it was meant to be. He wanted to pay him back, but how. And with what? Phil couldn’t just give him some chocolates or flowers, so what could he do? Then it hit Phil.

“You said you lost your voice, huh. So you were once able to talk?” he mumbled, looking over to Dan, to which the merman nodded. “Then do you want to try and get your voice back, maybe? I can try to teach you or something. Sometimes this happens as well in the human world. Would you like my help?”

Immediately when Phil had spoken those words, Dan’s face seemed to lighten up, his smile got brighter and he looked so happy when he nodded vigorously. This was all Dan had ever wanted, someone who truly seemed to care for him or even wanted to help him in any way. Almost as if Dan had a friend again...

***

The following days, maybe weeks, Dan and Phil kept meeting up. And Dan enjoyed it. He’d never been any happier in his life. Today was yet another day of Phil trying to teach Dan how to speak again and so far it went pretty well, although Dan couldn’t really speak quite yet. Their meeting spot on this day was a nice abandoned beach with lots of rocks.

Dan was sat on one of those rocks and watched Phil with great interest as he kept trying to help Dan and get him to speak while sitting next to him on the rock. Phil tried everything, from Baby’s First Words to extensive articulation and producing throat sounds. Nothing really helped, but still Dan seemed to make progress at least.

Fact was that Dan couldn’t keep his eyes off of Phil. His pale face, his black hair, blending in so well with Dan’s tail, his pretty blue eyes, even his bare chest and crazy swimming trunk, rocking a crazy palm tree motive. But it were Phil’s legs that were to Dan’s interest as well. If only Dan could have legs. Not that he wasn’t happy with being a merman, he just wanted to be where humans were, supposedly, and with Phil, maybe..

Dan eventually let out a big sigh and stared into the distance, not able to concentrate on Phil’s lesson anymore. He really wanted to just spend some time with Phil instead of always trying to learn new things and stuff. Dan wanted to show Phil pretty things in the ocean and watch the amazement in his eyes. Yeah..

“Dan?” Phil called out, noticing Dan’s sudden lack in concentration. “Are you listening?” Dan looked at him, not really sure how to look and just pulled a surprised face. “Ah well, I suppose you’d be getting tired of these constant attempts at making you speak, wouldn’t you?”

Dan nodded and Phil started laughing. Truth was that Phil had really grown fond of Dan and almost saw him as a friend. No, correction, Dan was Phil’s friend, maybe even one of his best friends. Nobody had ever listened to Phil like this. Even when Phil slacked off and wasn’t trying to teach Dan, went on an on about marine biology, Dan still listened and was, in fact, even interested.

To be honest, Phil had to admit that he, a successful marine biologist, was very lonely. He didn’t have a significant other, few friends that only cared about him when they needed something and Phil was sick and tired of people only liking him because of the fact that he always wanted the best for people. People always took advantage of Phil and, finally, Phil had come to realize just that.

“People sure can be hard, huh”, Phil then muttered under his breath, causing Dan to pull up his eyebrows questioningly. Dan laid his hand on Phil’s to get his attention and tilted his head a bit to the right. What exactly did Phil mean? “Oh it’s nothing. I was just thinking about how my friends are all just a bunch of people taking advantage of me…”

Dan noticed how sad Phil suddenly looked. Phil had never looked so sad before, at least not when Dan was around. So Dan leaned onto Phil, getting close to him to comfort him and he swore he saw a weak little smile forming around Phil’s lips.

Then Dan started to gesture things to Phil. It was finally time to tell him. “What are you trying to say?” Phil asked, taking notion of Dan’s gestures. “You lived in a group? Hm. Abandoned? Why?”

Dan shrugged and looked at his pitch black tail, flapping it against the rock absentmindedly. Dan remembered the incident like it was just yesterday. They’d asked Dan to go and fetch some food, which was really weird altogether because they always hunted in a group, but Dan still did it, causing him to be left behind. All alone. He was devastated when he found out.

“Well I guess we’re kind of in the same position then, aren’t we?” Phil asked Dan, smiling comfortingly at him, trying to make Dan feel better. Dan nodded, forcing a smile just for Phil..

They both sat there for a while, looking at the horizon where the sun was just setting and disappearing in the sea. Had they been together today for so long already? Dan always thought about how time seemed to pass so damn fast when he was with Phil, but when he was with Phil, he supposed, he was at home.

Both Phil and Dan had come to realize these days, weeks, just how much they had meant for each other and how much they had helped each other to become better, to be happy again. Dan sighed, placing his hand on top of Phil’s while they were looking at the sunset together.

Phil chuckled, turned his head to Dan with such a big smile and laughing so fondly he had his eyes closed, little wrinkles forming at the corners of his eyes. Dan almost gasped when he saw Phil like that. So he just smiled back.

“I’ve never seen such a beautiful sunset”, Phil sighed. And I’ve never met a human as beautiful as you, Dan thought “Not to mention I get to see it with you. This really is something, isn’t it?”

Dan and Phil sat there together for a while, in silence, just enjoying each other’s company and both lost in thoughts about themselves and the other. When the sun had disappeared and darkness had fallen over the little beach, Dan gestured towards the sea and invited Phil to dive into it with him. At first Phil was doubting it a bit, but agreed eventually.

A loud splash erupted and broke the silence as both boys dove into the water, Dan spiraling around Phil as Phil went head first into the water, diving deeper and deeper and enjoying the feeling of the water on his skin.

Dan was totally lost for a moment, staring wide-eyed at Phil before, at last, closing his eyes as well. He went with the kiss as it grew more and more passionate and his hands, now resting on Phil’s bare chest, began to reach down to his swimming trunks without Dan even fully realizing, playing with the little chords and later on with the hem of his pants..

When both of their heads popped up again out of the water, Phil chuckled again, loving each and every bit of this moment right now. When was the last time he has had so much fun in life?! His friends never made him as happy and enjoyable as Dan did right now.

“Dan”, Phil suddenly said with his eyes widening in surprised as he looked at Dan’s illuminating tail in the dark. It was like those deep sea fishes with transparent bodies and illuminating organs. The only difference was that Dan’s previously pitchblack tail now lit up with all sort of different colours and patterns in the dark. Phil was flabbergasted. “It’s beautiful”, he eventually just exclaimed with a sigh.

Dan smiled at Phil, to which Phil just couldn’t respond normally. The poor human was so enchanted by Dan’s nightly appearance that he was absorbed into his own thoughts. He realized, finally, that Dan wasn’t just this merman who he wanted to pay back for helping him. Dan meant a lot more to Phil. At the extend that Phil felt the urge to get closer to him. So he did.

The look of surprise on Dan’s face when Phil cupped his cheeks, leaning in closer as they both sunk back into the water, the transparent mess engulfing them and sending shivers through Phil’s body. Right at that moment Phil’s lips reached Dan’s.

Phil startled and quickly grabbed the hands of the merman and brought them back up, placing them on his rapidly beating heart. Phil broke the kiss for just a little moment to grin mischievously at Dan, who just looked at him with eyes full of passion, amazement and wonder. Dan had never done something like this. This was exciting for him.

This was Dan’s first kiss. And he didn’t mind getting his second right away. But weren’t humans supposed to stick with other humans of the opposite gender? Dan always read about that. Mermaids and mermen didn’t really care about the gender, but he had heard that humans made a big mess about it. Apparently Phil didn’t care and Dan was happy in some way. No, he was one big bundle of joy because he now realized Phil deeply cared about him, almost as much as Dan cared about Phil..

“I will come to see you again tomorrow”, Phil announced, breaking their one kiss of many that evening. Dan looked at him and focussed on Phil eyes, following every movements of Phil’s pupils, who were just looking back at Dan. “Look out for a big white boat, okay?”

Dan nodded, eagerly leaning back into Phil to kiss him again. Phil snickered, giving in to Dan’s obvious demands and kissing him again because both of them, merman and human, were the most happy creatures to exist on the earth at that exact moment.

***

“I.. I”, Dan sighed, taking a deep breath before finishing his sentence. “I love you, Phil.

It was still early in the morning and Dan was sat in the cave he took Phil to for the first time weeks ago, trying out different sounds, which now definitely sounded like words already. When Dan bursted out this whole sentence, after practising in secret for weeks, including this whole night - Dan didn’t need no sleep -, he smiled brightly like an idiot.

The truth was that the whole reason for Dan practising in secret was that he wanted to surprise Phil and burst out a whole sentence when he saw him today. Dan wanted his first words to be special, he wanted them to be just for Phil.

Talking was now getting relatively easy again for Dan, all thanks to Phil, and it made Dan excited to see his human again. His human… Dan snickered and leaned back, his arms supporting him from on the cold cave floor with his tail flailing half in the water.

But why hadn’t Dan talked to Phil yet? His speech was getting back and saying sentences seemed to work well.. Well, it was very simple. Dan hadn’t really found something he had wanted to say to Phil and he wanted it to be special, not just a simple ‘thank you’ or something like that. Now Dan had found it…

I love you, Phil.

Yeah, that was something Dan wanted to say to him. It had been on his mind ever since yesterday. How Phil had kissed him... Dan had forgotten what love could feel like and this was definitely it. Dan closed his eyes and laid his back down on the floor of the cave, the cold sending shivers down his spine.

After Dan had been left alone, he’d always thought he’d never find anyone even remotely close to a friend anymore. But Phil was more than just a friend, Dan loved Phil. Dan loved Phil…

Dan’s eyes shot wide open and he stared at the ceiling with a big smile on his face. Dan loved Phil. He liked the sound of that, alright.

Sighing deeply, Dan let himself slide into the water again and he made his way out of the cave. Phil was going to come and see him again. With a boat as well. Were they going to sail somewhere far away? Dan supposed so. It was the only explanation that kind of made sense. Right?

It was still early in the afternoon when Dan went searching for the white boat. It shouldn’t be hard to spot in the deep, dark, open ocean. Dan should see it perfectly from underwater and just when Dan was getting a little impatient, he saw the big, white boat approaching him on the surface. He immediately swam towards it, but something else interrupted him..

To Dan’s surprise he felt a strange force pulling him up and when he looked around him, frantically trying to figure out was happening, he found himself in a net. Was this a fishing net? Several other little fish were pulled up along with Dan and when they reached the surface, a cold breeze hit Dan’s face like he was being punched by someone. What was happening?

Then Dan saw Phil standing there on the deck as he was being pulled up by this weird net thing and his mind went blank for a split second before all of his emotions spilled out at once. Was Phil behind all of this? Why did Phil want to catch Dan? Had this always been some kind of trick? Phil..

Dan was at complete loss for words, now quite literally, and he just stared at Phil for the passing seconds in which he was brought onto the deck with this fishing net. Then Dan cracked, the words he wanted to say to Phil earlier didn’t even occur in his mind anymore, but he just burst out yelling something else. Something completely… different.

"I hate you! I hate you! I HATE YOU!” Dan yelled, the anger and adrenaline racing through his fragile body. “I'm never trusting anyone ever again since it always seems to backfire right at me! I trusted YOU, Phil. I wanted YOU to hear my first words, I wanted it to be special! Is THIS what you wanted to hear me say?!"

The net hit the deck and Dan was thrown onto it with a dull thud. He rolled forward, hitting his head and elbow in the process and hurting them as well. He gritted his teeth with anger as he pushed himself up to face Phil, who was rushing up to him. “Dan, I didn’t..”

“Shut up”, Dan spat at him, wiping away a little blood that had appeared at the corner of his mouth due to the hard fall Dan had just experienced. His eyes blazed with a fire awakening within him and he cringed when he heard the voices of his former friends and family ring in his ears.

Humans are not to be trusted, Daniel. Why would you even care about those two-legged bastards.

He could almost hear them scream the “Told you so!” into his ears as he realized what a mess he had become now. Two people from the boat pulled him up with his arms and Dan looked at Phil one last time. Phil, who just looked at him in complete loss for words and an explanation. How could Dan have been such a complete fool.

“Dan..” Phil tried one last time, but the merman refused to listen any longer. It was way too late now. Dan’s heart was broken. And he was beyond repairing now.

Did Dan love Phil? No, not anymore.

***

When Dan woke up again, he felt a little dizzy and without realizing it, his hand trailed up towards his head to feel it. Wait why did he want to feel it..?

Dan’s eyes shot wide open and he remembered again. He had been captured and hit his head and elbow in the process, right? All of it thanks to Phil.. Dan’s head felt heavy because of the headache he started to feel now, but his heart felt even heavier..

But where was Dan now? He looked all around him and found himself in unfamiliar waters with fake plants and all sorts of fish - who normally would never swim together - surrounding him from everywhere. And when he looked really closely into the distance he even saw humans walking past. What the hell was this supposed to be?

Slowly Dan swam over to the humans walking past until he hit something hard. Was this.. glass? Dan placed his hand to the strange object and his mouth dropped in surprise. Was he in some kind of enclosed space? That thing humans used to visit to watch the fish. That was exactly where he was. Totally dumbstruck Dan let his hand rest on the glass, causing the humans to make a fuss about it and then they all starting pointing their flashy thingies at him. Camera’s. Weren’t they called something like that?

Dan couldn’t deny the fact that he felt miserable as fuck. Never had he been so unhappy in his life, not even when his friends and family had abandoned him. Then he still had some freedom, now he was trapped. Never free to roam the seas again. Why had he trusted Phil? Why had he even thought for a single minute that Phil wouldn’t betray him or leak his existence into the world. Dan felt like a fool, a big one as well.

Dear Poseidon, what had he gotten himself into.. There was nothing to do about this, so Dan figured he should go check this place out to at least have something to do. Soon Dan found himself back in his regular habits of just swimming around, like before he met Phil. His life didn’t really have a purpose anymore. It never really had since nobody seemed to care about him.

After swimming for a while, Dan noticed some rocks in the distance that belonged to this enclosure, so he decided to take a break there and he pushed himself onto the rocks. He was lucky the humans couldn’t get here to bother him with their flashy camera’s, but Dan could still hear the clicks now he was out of the water, which caused him to sigh deeply. What a mess.

“Dan?” A familiar voice rang in Dan’s ears. Could it be? No, Dan didn’t want to hear him right now. What would he even do here? Why would he even want to see Dan now. “Dan, it’s me. Phil. Please look at me.”

Dan gasped. It really was him. What was he doing here? The fact that he even dared to show his face now angered him so much. Dan turned around to Phil, who was climbing up the rocks and gazed intensely at him with a look that could kill. It surprised Phil to see Dan this way or, maybe not. It was Phil’s fault after all. If only he had been more careful and if only Dan wanted to listen, even for just a second.

“I want to explain this, please let me”, Phil begged the stubborn merman, but it didn’t seem like Dan was going to give in anytime soon. Dan had let the anger get the better of him and lived off of that. Totally understandable to Phil’s opinion. Although it really wasn’t Phil’s intention to get Dan here at all and this had all been just an unfortunate accident, Phil still blamed himself and beat himself up for it. Phil felt like a fool, a big one as well.

“Why even bother”, Dan muttered, not even shifting his gaze and remaining like that. It got Phil, it made him nervous and sweaty and Phil kind of lost his ability to speak for a moment because of Dan’s stern death gaze. Phil blamed himself for this so much, he just wanted to see Dan smile again. Phil loved Dan, but Dan didn’t love Phil anymore. Or maybe that was just what Dan thought. Of course he still loved Phil, he was just too angry and broken to remember.

“I’m so amazed with your speech, Dan”, Phil said, trying to set Dan in a better mood, but that only made Dan even more angry, so Phil sighed deeply and sat down next to Dan, keeping a little distance in between them. “I’m sorry.”

Dan lift up his eyebrows and the anger in his eyes simmered down just a little bit. “What?”

“I am sorry, Dan. I really am. I never wanted any of this to happen. I was so set on keeping you for myself at first and I was planning to let it stay that way, but that day on the beach.. The day we kissed. My colleague saw us and he tricked me into taking a fisherman’s boat instead of the yacht I was planning on taking so you and I could sail to somewhere remote and I should have seen it coming, but I was too blind to see, Dan. Can’t you see that I’m in love with you? I get that you’re angry, and yeah, this is all my fault, but please.. please forgive me...” Phil’s voice started wavering at the end and a single teardrop made his way down his cheek as Dan kept staring at it.

“It’s too late for that, Phillip”, Dan whispered and then dove into the water, leaving a desperate Phil behind. Phil hadn’t suspected anything different.

“Wait!” Phil yelled at Dan. There was something he definitely needed to say to Dan. It could save his life for God’s sake. How could Phil have forgotten such an important part of what he was supposed to say. “DAN!”

***

Dan awoke quite roughly out of his sleep that night because of the feeling like he was going to choke. He was shivering uncontrollably on what seemed to be a metal operating table with his body strapped to it. He was so cold. What was happening? Dan kept gasping for air, feeling like he could run out of it at any moment.

Then someone splashed a whole lot of water into his face and Dan felt like he could breath a little again. He saw a big bucket disappear before his face and an unfamiliar human face taking his place.

“He needs water, you moron”, the man told another man, who was also in the room with him. They both wore white lab coats and one of them held a scalpel in his hand, the one closest to Dan’s body. What were they planning on doing? “If we want to keep him alive for as long as we can during this dissection, he needs water!”

Dissection? They were going to dissect Dan? What was this? Why? How? Immediately Dan started struggling heavily, the straps holding him firmly onto the table and lightly cutting his flesh, causing him to scream in pain, but there was no sound. Was his mouth taped?

The man with the scalpel laughed at his friend with the glasses, who started laughing too. So they were going to dissect him, huh? Dan’s family had been right after all. Why had Dan ever doubted them? They were kind to him, even when he had left to immigrate further to the north with his friends, and always warned him about the dangers of the world..

Dan suddenly felt the cold metal of the scalpel on his skin, he wanted to scream and bit on the inside of his cheek until it started bleeding because he wasn’t even able to scream because of the tape when the scalpel cut through his abdomen, sending an aching pain all throughout Dan’s body. It hurt so much Dan thought he was going to pass out.

The pain was unbearable and impossible to describe. The only thing Dan could do was think about nice things and nice moments while his tummy was ripped open. They probably won’t stitch Dan back up afterwards, since they only wanted to see where a merman was different from a human, but Dan could always keep that hope in mind. He tried to think about nice moments… Nice moments.

Phil was the first thing that came into Dan’s mind when he was trying to think of nice moments. All those times Phil had sat down with Dan to actually learn him how to speak again, which had been successful to say the least. But the moment Phil had kissed Dan was a moment that kept returning to Dan’s mind and it almost helped him forget the pain, but not really.

Dan’s vision was getting blurry and mixed with the images in his head that kept popping up. The last thing he saw before passing out was Phil’s face screaming his name in terror and shaking him violently, repeating to him that he shouldn’t give up yet and stay with him.

This was a nice way to go, Dan thought...

Phil was devastated as he saw Dan’s eyes close slowly before him. Phil hadn’t just knocked down two scientist in his attempt to save Dan. There was no way in hell Phil was going to let go of Dan now, so he listened closely to Dan’s heartbeat - it was still beating, thank God - and then started loosening the straps that had caused Dan’s body to be all cut up and full of wounds. How could Phil have let it come this far? Manning himself up by taking a deep breath, he took a needle and some thread into his shaky hands and started stitching Dan back up. At least a little bit so the majority of the bleeding would stop. Phil just wanted Dan to live.

When he was finally finished, Phil quickly cut the thread and threw the needle away, shoving his hand underneath the unconscious Dan and picking him up in his arms. Dan’s head immediately fell against Phil’s chest, but Dan still seemed to be breathing regularly, causing Phil to sigh in relief.

As Phil was carrying Dan out into the rain on his way back to his house - what other place was there for Phil to go - he started crying uncontrollably, stumbling multiple times because of his undeniably clumsiness and bad sight because of the rain.

Then suddenly one of Dan’s arms trailed up to Phil’s bloody shirt before gripping it tightly and cringing up into a little ball. Phil looked at Dan’s tail, which normally would have glowed in the dark, but now only showed the faint pattern of it. “I’m so terribly sorry, Dan”, Phil whispered, kissing the merman lovingly on his forehead. “We’re almost home.”

***

Phil was quietly preparing a meal for himself in his big, open kitchen, when he heard some splashing coming from the bathroom. Immediately he left everything he was doing and made a run for the bathroom. He threw open the door and saw Dan sitting there, upright quite lost while staring at Phil, in his enormous bathtub and Phil smiled. “Dan..”

The moment Dan saw Phil and heard him call out his name, he started crying, big tears streaming down his cheeks while he kept shaking and started sobbing as well. He remembered everything from last night, he had even noticed Phil’s bloody shirt that was thrown into a corner of the room and was immediately overcome with fear. Of course, Phil quickly went up to him and knelt down next to the bathtub. “Maybe this is a stupid question, but are you okay? Does it hurt somewhere?”

Dan shook his head, still crying, and then threw his arms around Phil’s neck, pulling him closer for comfort while nuzzling his face into his shoulder. Phil was overcome by surprise, but didn’t even hesitate to hug the merman back.

“I’m okay”, Dan said quietly, his voice faint and trembling. “Thank you. Thank you for saving me.”

Phil smiled and hugged Dan even tighter. They kept sitting like that for a while and neither of them cared about the discomfort that pose gave because being so close to each other set them both at peace and made them forget what a horrible night they had just lived through. Dan wasn’t even angry at Phil anymore. He now realized it had been quite stupid and it hadn’t really been Phil’s fault. Phil was just happy he could hold Dan in his arms again. He really thought he had lost him there.

Then Phil leaned back to look at Dan and gently cupped the merman’s cheeks, looking at him lovingly before smiling at him. Dan tried to smile back, but let out a big sob instead, not because he was scared anymore but because he was so happy to see Phil’s face again. Emotions ran high in Dan’s body and he leaned in closer to Phil, kissing him tenderly while grabbing his shirt for support. “I love you, Dan”, Phil said in between kisses. “I really do and I promise you I will always protect you no matter what.”

Dan smiled as he kissed Phil once again and pulled him closer. Dan felt so much love and comfort from just kissing Phil and he couldn’t stop now that he had started it. “I love you too, Phil.”

“Dan,” Phil said, breaking their kiss yet again. “Why don’t we get away from here? I’ll hide you when we’re moving and we’ll buy a big house with a big pool inside and outside where you can swim and where we can be together. I never want to risk losing you again.”

Dan smiled and pulled Phil in for a hug after kissing his cheek. “I would like that very much.”

The rest of the day both Dan and Phil spend looking at houses on Phil’s laptop and planning how they were going to move and to where and for the first time since long, both of them felt at home. Things might not be easy for them in the future, Dan being a merman and Phil being just human, but both Dan and Phil were prepared to face any difficulties that came heading their way. Neither of them was going to give up on their happiness now because for the very first time both of them felt loved.