#mentalstigma

So, while I was replanting a few of my succulents, I had some time to think. Gardening is very relaxing and therapeutic. You cant help but pour love and good light directly from your soul into your little plant.

Whats the point, you may be wondering. The point I’m getting across is that you should sprinkle kindness, light and love everywhere. That sh*t is free to do! Be kind, put a smile on someone’s face. Whether it’s a simple wave to someone you don’t know, to holding opening the door for a mother with a stroller. It can be anything really!

For once my urgent need to make my current depressive episode the center of everything has been overshadowed by my want to be there for others. Maybe I am recovering. Maybe it's because I'm a mom now.

For days my intrusive thoughts (Jessica) get louder and clearer and I don't feel like my medical professional team is really behind me. Maybe I'm a pathetic excuse for a human and that's why I feel they just don't understand. This thought is constant: Maybe I'm not trying my hardest and everyone thinks I'm useless and wasting time and space.