Keegan X Reader: Period to the Day
Finally I have an new writing piece! Haha, I still have quite a bit of other pieces that need to be edited through. And all those Parts 2s will be out when I have the time. Luckily I have a Creative Writing class in which I have a professor who is perfectly okay with us writing stuff like this. So enjoy this story!
WARNING: Talks of a woman's menstrual cycle.
Y/n kept her gaze fixed on the wall just beyond the captainâs shoulder, eyes glassy, unfocused. His voice droned onâmeasured, commanding, a steady cadence of mission parameters and logistical pointsâbut she caught none of it. The words washed over her like distant static, filed away for later when the briefing notes would spell out the details in black and white. Normally, she prided herself on being sharp, the type to absorb every order without needing the paper trail. The dependable one. The so-called âteacherâs petâ of the squad.
But right now, her body had staged a quiet mutiny.
A dull pressure coiled low in her abdomen, not quite pain yet, but something insistent, a tug in her muscles that whispered of what was coming. She shifted in her chair, spine stiff against the hard backrest, hoping no one noticed the subtle movement. It wasnât sharp enough to double her overâno, this was the beginning stage, the warning flicker before the storm. It was the kind of discomfort that clung to you like a damp chill on a field exercise: not cold enough to kill, not hot enough to sweat out, just enough to gnaw at the edges of your patience and remind you that comfort was a luxury.
Her mind circled the same thought: Please, not now.
Around her, the scrape of chairs filled the room as soldiers stood at once, boots scuffing against the concrete floor. The spell of stillness broke, and she sighed inwardly. Sitting had dulled the cramps to a bearable throb, but she knew the moment she stood, gravity would make itself known. The uterus had a way of biting down when given motionâlike an animal tugging against a leash. Stand, move, and the dull ache would sharpen, flare, then eventually settle again into a simmer once her body accepted the routine.
She rose with the others, careful to control her posture, but she felt it instantlyâthat subtle downward pull inside, the traitorous reminder of biology she had no command over. And with it came the creeping dread: she hadnât slipped a pad on yet. The barracks were half a compound away, and if the blood decided to make its presence known now, sheâd be stuck crossing open ground in uniform with nowhere to hide. A red stain wasnât just humiliating; here, it was a signal flare. Trained eyes around her were conditioned to spot blood instantly, to react to it with urgency. They wouldnât see a period. Theyâd see a wounded soldier.
The men here knew about periodsâbiologically, theoretically. They knew the clinical words for it, could recite the fact that cramps were âuncomfortable.â But they didnât know. They would never know the way it stole concentration mid-briefing, or how it drained energy before a mission, or how it left you dreading simple things like standing up from a chair. They didnât know how a body could sabotage itself for a week straight, bleeding and aching and misfiring with hormone shifts that left you bone-tired one minute and irritable the next.
Sure, men had their painâthe kind of pain that came with a sudden impact, sharp and temporary, dropping them to their knees. But it ended. They could walk it off, curse, laugh, and move on. Women didnât get that mercy. This was slow, steady, inescapable. Blood and lining at a âhealthy rate,â as the textbooks would say, but there was nothing healthy about dragging yourself through drills while it felt like a vice tightened inside you.
She fell in step with the others, face neutral, mask in place. Outwardly, she was the soldier, no different than anyone else leaving the briefing room. Inside, she was calculating distance, speed, and the odds of making it back to her quarters without biology betraying her.
That was soldiering, too: fighting battles no one else could see, carrying on as if nothing was wrong, even when everything in your body insisted otherwise.
By the time Y/n crossed into the quieter section of the compound, where the library and rec room sat side by side, her body made the decision for her. The slow ache in her stomach turned sharp, and she froze mid-stride as warmth bloomed beneath her fatigues. Her teeth caught her bottom lip, shoulders tightening as though bracing against incoming fire. No one lingered in the corridorâno chatter, no boots echoing on the concreteâbut her cheeks still flushed crimson. Anger curled hot in her chest, not at any enemy, but at the betrayal of her own body.
She clenched her fists until the knuckles whitened, then forced herself to breathe. A furtive glance over her shoulder confirmed she was alone before she slipped one hand down, pressing against the fabric of her pants with a soldierâs precisionâchecking damage, assessing the risk. Relief came in a thin, shaky exhale. Dry. For now.
There was no time to waste. The womenâs barracks were still a stretch away, but she knew a shortcut: cut through the menâs wing, save minutes, maybe save herself a humiliating explanation. Even so, the walk itself became an ordeal. Blood in your underwear wasnât just unpleasantâit was a constant reminder with every step, like wearing wet clothes that clung and rubbed raw. Worse still, there was no disguising the shift in gait it forced. She tried to walk as though nothing had changed, but every movement felt studied, artificial.
Men passed her in the hall, nodding casually, eyes flicking over her in that soldierâs way of assessing without really looking. She nodded back, face carefully neutral, even as her stomach twisted. Do they see it? Is it obvious? The thought repeated like the hammer of a firing pin. But no one paused, no one frowned, and she carried on, pulse steadying as the female barracks came into sight.
Her relief was sharp and private. She swiped her ID card so quickly the reader gave a protesting beep before unlocking. The door swung shut behind her, shutting out the noise of the compound, and she let her mask slip for the first time. Her hands moved with the efficiency of drillâclean underwear, pad from the neatly folded supply in her closet, everything laid out in seconds.
She darted back into the hall, boots striking the floor with clipped urgency, and slid into the shared washroom. The space was dividedârows of sinks, shower stalls, toilet stallsâbut thankfully empty at this hour. She locked herself into one, tugging down the soiled uniform pieces with a grimace. The blood was there, a dark stain sheâd hoped to avoid, stark against the fabric. She cleaned herself quickly with toilet paper, wincing at the sticky warmth, before slipping into the fresh underwear. The padâs adhesive crackled faintly as she pressed it into place, wings folded tight. The simple barrier felt like armor, a fragile reassurance against further embarrassment.
Before leaving, she wiped down the worst of the blood from the ruined pair, flushing the tissue away with the mechanical churn of the toilet. Out in the open again, she wrapped the underwear in paper towel, tucking it under her arm as though it were contraband, and slipped back to her room.
The laundry basket swallowed the bundle, but her expression tightened, nose wrinkling. A soldier could wade through mud, blood, sweat, and worse without blinkingâbut this always managed to feel different. A battlefield hidden inside her own body, fought in silence, and dismissed as âjust part of itâ by anyone whoâd never have to endure it.
She sat on the edge of her bunk for a moment, elbows on her knees, breathing steady. The cramps were still there, low and insistent, but at least now she was armed for the fight.
The discomfort that had been nagging at Y/nâs abdomen all day suddenly shiftedâno longer the dull, teasing ache she could tolerate, but a white-hot spike of pain that felt like someone was carving her out from the inside with a dull blade. The cramp hit so sharply she gasped and folded forward instinctively, arms cinching tight around her middle as if she could hold the pain in place. It was no comfort. Muscles spasmed beneath her skin, twisting and tearing like barbed wire being yanked through her gut.
A low, helpless sound broke from her throat as she slid onto her side, curling tight on the lower bunk. The thin mattress did little to soften the pressure of the metal frame beneath, and the stale barracks air seemed heavier now, clinging to her skin like another weight she couldnât shed.
Her eyes flicked to the top bunk, empty. God, how she wished her roommate was here. At least then she could beg for backupâsomeone to run to the medical ward, grab her the Advil she wasnât allowed to keep in her locker. Regulations were written for firefights and triage: no unlogged meds, no unknowns in the bloodstream that could interfere with treatment. Logical on paper. But in moments like this, the logic felt like a cruel joke. She didnât need morphine or blood typing. She just needed one damn pill to take the edge off the cramping that had hijacked her body.
Instead, she had nothing.
Another cramp rolled through, a slow twisting vice that dragged a broken whine from her throat. She clenched her teeth, furious at herself for the sound, but there was no holding it in. Goddamn it. She squeezed her eyes shut, replaying all the excuses she could reach forâhow sheâd slacked off on leave, skipped her usual runs and calisthenics. Exercise was the only thing that seemed to keep her cycle in check, but three weeks of lounging, sleeping in, letting her body rest had undone her discipline. Now she was paying the price.
Her phone lit up on the nightstand, screen flashing with notifications. Messages stacked one after another, but she didnât bother reaching for it. Out there, she was the soldier, always answering, always dependable. In here, she was a body at war with itself, pinned down by cramps that made her want to curl smaller and smaller until she vanished. The phone could wait. The whole world could damn well wait. She had nothing on the schedule until tomorrowâs mission anyway.
Another wave of pain seized her abdomen, sharper this time, dragging a curse out from between clenched teeth. She shifted, hoping to find some angle where the ache would loosen its grip, but the motion only provoked it further. Her body rebelled with a violent stab, and she bit back a hiss, nails pressing crescents into her palms.
The phone began to ring now, vibrating against the wood of the nightstand with an insistent rattle. Someone was actually calling her after the unanswered texts. She squeezed her eyes shut, wishing the noise away. Each shrill tone was a reminder that she was unreachable, unwilling, locked in a private battle no one could see. She wanted the ringing to stop, wanted the silence backâthen, when it did, she hated that too. The quiet pressed in around her, as heavy and suffocating as the cramps themselves.
Curled on her bunk, she let out a bitter laugh that came out more like a groan. A soldier could march for miles under load, run through gunfire, drag a bleeding comrade to cover. But one week every month, all of that training meant nothing. Her greatest enemy wasnât out in the field. It was here, in her own body, gutting her from the inside.
AA knock at the door snapped Y/n out of her cocoon of misery. She didnât move, didnât answerâjust narrowed her eyes at the ceiling, jaw tight. Whoever it was could go to hell. All she needed was stillness. Stillness and time. The pain always eased eventually, tapering down into something she could manage. If she relaxed, maybe it would pass. Maybe it wouldnât feel like a serrated knife sawing at her insides.
She whimpered despite herself, clutching her stomach tighter.
The knock came again. Persistent. Then silence. For a second, she almost smiled. Good. Finally gave up. But the reprieve was short-lived. A faint, mechanical beep sounded against the doorframeâa denial tone. She didnât need to see it to know what it meant: someone had tried swiping into her room. Male ID. The system barred them automatically from womenâs quarters.
Her lips pressed into a thin, angry line. She wanted to roll away, put her back to the door, shut the world out. But the thought of moving made her stomach clench harder, so she stayed where she wasâcoiled, glaring at nothing, listening.
Muffled voices filtered through the wall. A womanâs tone joined the manâs, higher pitched, soft but insistent. A second later, the electronic lock gave its grudging click, and the door creaked open. Whoever it was slipped inside and shut it quickly, the thud muffled against the barracks air.
Y/n didnât lift her head. Didnât ask. She didnât care. Let them stand there, let them stew. Her body was already wringing her out like a wet rag, each cramp punishing her for the simple crime of not being pregnant this month. Whoever had designed the female body deserved worse than this.
A low, familiar voice cut through the haze. âI called you.â
Her eyes cracked open, lids heavy, and she found Keegan crouched beside her bunk. His mask was on, shadows carved deep into the lines of his gear, but his voice was unmistakableâquiet, steady, threaded with that calm steel she always leaned on. She grunted in reply, nothing more.
âAre you sick?â He peeled a glove off, calloused fingers brushing her forehead with a medicâs efficiency. No fever. His hand lingered only a moment before dropping to rest on his knee. His eyes, blue and sharp, didnât waver. âWhy arenât you answering me?â
It was a fair question. She usually answered him before he finished speakingâalways quick to tell him things, always eager for the comfort of his quiet listening. She loved the way he never interrupted, how he spoke sparingly, like every word was chosen with care. On missions, he kept her close. Off duty, he stayed steady. Reliable. Her anchor.
This time, though, she could only grit her teeth, body curling tighter. The knife-twist inside her abdomen pulsed again, hot and merciless, dragging a hiss out of her. âHurtsâŠâ The word tore itself free in a drawn-out hiss, her bitchy defiance collapsing into something softer, needier.
Keegan stayed crouched, steady as a rock beside her bunk, watching her with the patient intensity of a man who never rushed to fill silence. His presence alone grounded her, even as the pain tried to tear her apart from the inside.
âHowâd you get hurt?â Keeganâs voice was low, edged with concern, as his sharp eyes scanned her body for injuries. His gaze lingered on her postureâcurled tight, hand pressed to her abdomenâas if trying to piece together the story from the way she lay on her bunk.
Theyâd only been together a month. Missions, training, long hours on baseâthat was the rhythm theyâd shared so far. This, though, was his first introduction to seeing her like this: wrecked not by bullets or bruises, but by something far more ordinary and yet every bit as vicious.
She bit her lip, face heating, before whispering, âPeriod.â
The word came out like a confession, though she knew it shouldnât have. One of her old teachers had drilled into her that periods should be normalized, spoken about without shame. But that was theory. In practice, admitting it still flushed her cheeks red, especially saying it to him.
Keegan didnât flinch, didnât recoil. He gave a short grunt, his version of an acknowledgment, blue eyes steady on her. Silence stretched for a beat before he crouched closer, a gloved hand brushing her shoulder. âWhat do you need?â
Her pride faltered, pain cutting through it like shrapnel. âPills. Pain meds. Please. And⊠a warm pack.â Her voice cracked on the plea.
âAlright.â He squeezed her shoulder gently before rising to his full height. âIâll be back. Donât move.â
A weak laugh broke from her. âWouldnât dream of it.â
He made it two steps toward the door before pausing. âI need your ID.â
âItâs in my pocket,â she muttered, too drained to move.
Keegan stood still for a moment, as if waiting her out. When she didnât budge, he exhaled softly through his mask and returned to her side. With careful precision, he reached into her back pocket and slid the card free. Her lips curved in a small, mischievous grin despite the pain, and he shook his head at her before disappearing into the hall.
Time stretched like an elastic band in his absence. Each minute felt heavy, pulled taut by the cramps grinding at her insides. To Keegan, with his long stride and no-nonsense pace, the trip across base probably took no more than fifteen minutesâsigning out meds under her name, tracking down a heat packâbut to her it dragged on like an eternity.
When the door finally clicked open again, she was sprawled on her bunk, pale but theatrically draping an arm across her eyes. âWhat took you so long?â she groaned, her tone somewhere between genuine complaint and mock drama.
Keegan just stared at her for a beat, unimpressed, before pressing the pills into her palm and shoving her water bottle into the other. âHad to explain why I was signing out meds for someone who wasnât me,â he said simply.
She hummed, popping the pills into her mouth and holding the water there for a second before swallowing, then chasing it with another long sip. With a sigh, she collapsed back onto the mattress like a dying soldier reenacting her final scene.
Keegan shook his head and tossed the heat pack onto her stomach. She snatched it up like a starving seagull on a french fry, pressing it against her abdomen with something close to reverence. The warmth spread almost instantly, easing the cramps like a tide pulling back from the shore. Relief softened her face, tension draining from her shoulders.
Keegan lowered himself to the floor beside her bunk, settling with one leg stretched out, the other bent with his arm resting casually across his knee. His other hand toyed absently with a strap on his gear, mask tilted toward her. He didnât say muchâhe rarely didâbut his presence was grounding. Quiet, steady, solid.
Y/n let out a slow breath, the heat soothing her, the meds already promising relief. The pain wasnât gone, not yet, but with Keegan thereâsilent sentinel at her sideâit felt manageable. For the first time all day, she didnât feel like she was fighting her body alone.
âIâve got a mission tomorrow,â Y/n said suddenly, breaking the quiet. Her voice was soft at first, like she was only testing if he was still listening, but then she shifted, wanting to talkâwanting to fill the silence with anything other than the steady throb in her stomach.
Keegan hummed low in his throat, tilting his head slightly as if to say go on. He didnât need to push her; he never did. He let her decide what to share, and when she did, he absorbed every word.
âTwo weeks in no-manâs land,â she went on, sighing, âintel gathering. Theyâre sending us to the coast. The beach. Havenât been near one in a long time.â
At that, his head turned, mask catching the dim light. His pale eyes fixed on her. âThe beach⊠covered in debris?â The way he said it was flat, skeptical, but not mockingâjust Keegan cutting through her wistfulness with the blunt edge of reality.
She chuckled and nodded, her gaze lifting to the underside of the top bunk as though she could picture the ruined shoreline there. âYeah. Apparently thereâs some commander tucked away out there. Weâre supposed to watch him, track movement, all the usual. It should be straightforward.â She smiled, faint but genuine, then looked back at him. âI wasnât exactly hanging onto every word in the briefing.â
That earned her the smallest twitch in the corner of his eyesâhis version of amusement.
âPretty sure itâs just: sneak in, spy on the guy, come back,â she added with a laugh.
âFor two weeks?â Keegan asked. He wasnât doubting her so much as weighing the length, running the numbers in his head.
She gave a lopsided grin, heat pack still pressed to her abdomen. âTwo weeks of fun.â
His brow arched ever so slightly, the faintest tilt of disbelief. Fun, he seemed to say without needing the word.
âOkay, maybe not that much fun,â she admitted quickly, âbut better than sitting around here training day in and day out. Or worse, running into another firefight.â Her tone softened, almost thoughtful. âSometimes the groundâs better than the beds here, anyway.â
Keeganâs head tilted again. âYou donât like your bed?â
âThey suck,â Y/n groaned, throwing her free arm up for emphasis. âMattresses are paper-thin. You feel every single bar digging into you all night. Then they expect us to roll out at five a.m. like we werenât just sleeping on scrap metal.â She stretched the word ugh with mock despair, her voice echoing faintly against the cinderblock walls.
He caught her flailing hand before it clipped him in the face, lowering it gently. âI donât think the beds are that bad,â he said simply.
Her head whipped toward him in disbelief. âHow! Theyâre the worst. Iâd rather cut wood and build my own frame than sleep on this junkyard special.â
He only shrugged, calm as ever.
âNo, I donât buy that.â Determination sparked in her eyes. She wriggled off her bunk, standing between his long legs where he sat on the floor. âGo on. Lay down. Prove it.â Her arms folded across her chest in challenge.
Keegan sighed, quiet but audible, and pushed himself up. Without protest, he lowered onto her neatly made bed, still in full gear, arms folded across his chest. He lay there flat, staring up at the ceiling like a man awaiting judgment.
Y/nâs smirk grew as she watched his expression change. His eyes shifted from placid boyfriend humoring her to what the hell, sheâs right in seconds. He sat up, then swung his legs over the side, pressing his gloved hands down into the mattress, testing its thinness. His gaze cut back to her. âThis isnât like mine.â
Her brows drew together. âAll the beds in the barracks are the same.â
He shook his head slightly. âNot ours. Task Force STALKERâs quarters are separate.â
Her lips parted in mock offense. âI knew you had your own section, but you mean to tell me youâve got better beds too?â She narrowed her eyes, leaning closer. âWhatâs nextâyou gonna say you get chocolate bars, too?â
His eyes glinted, the smallest spark of dry humor there. âSometimes.â
She gasped, hand flying dramatically to her chest before she swung a playful punch at him. He caught it easily, hand closing around her fist, and with a gentle tug he pulled her against him.
She landed in his chest, warmth radiating through his tac vest. His steady heartbeat thudded beneath the layers, grounding her as much as the heat pack had. Keegan said nothingâhe rarely needed toâbut his silence wasnât empty. It was weighty, attentive, the kind of quiet that told her he was listening, that he liked listening, that her words mattered.
And she kept talking, even as the cramps gnawed at her from the inside, because it didnât hurt quite as much with him there.
âItâs not fair,â Y/n muttered, her voice pitched with equal parts complaint and weariness. âYou guys get better everything. Better beds, better food, even better missions. We barely ever get sent into no-manâs-land.â
Keegan had his arms around her now, steadying her like an anchor. His gloved hands slid from her elbows down to her forearms, grounding her against his chest. âIs that really a bad thing?â His tone was level, but not dismissiveâjust Keegan being Keegan, nudging her to think instead of feeding her frustration.
âItâs boring here.â She frowned, leaning into him, stubborn as ever.
âMmm.â He hummed low, the sound reverberating against her ear as he rocked her side to side in a slow, unconscious motion. It was the closest thing to a lullaby she was likely to get out of him.
Her eyes narrowed suddenly, thought cutting through her crankiness. âWait a second. How did you even get in here? Menâs IDs donât open womenâs rooms.â
âI asked someone to let me in,â he answered simply, rocking never stopping.
âOhâŠâ Y/n fell quiet for a moment, then her curiosity sparked again. âWho?â
âI donât know her name.â He shrugged, like it didnât matter.
âWhat did she look like?â Y/n pressed, her nosiness outweighing her cramps.
His pale brows lifted behind the mask, but he indulged her anyway. âBlonde hair with brown streaks. Taller than you. Brown eyes.â
âMia,â Y/n muttered with a scowl. âFigures. I donât like her.â
âOh?â Keegan tilted his head slightly.
âSheâs a petty little princess. Her dadâs a commander here. Acts like she owns the place.â Y/n shuddered, curling her lip. âIâd love nothing more than to rip that smug smile right off her face.â
Keegan gave the smallest shake of his head, a wordless youâre impossible.
âSheâs a bitch,â Y/n added flatly, punctuating it with a yawn.
Keegan let it pass, eyes flicking toward the door. âWhereâs your roommate?â
âNo idea.â She rolled onto her back with a wince, then contradicted herself. âThink sheâs in the training yard. Knife drills, probably. I was going to go, but I had that briefing. Why?â
âIf you want a better sleep, I can get you into STALKERâs barracks,â he said, quiet but firm.
Y/n frowned, uneasy. âIâm not supposed to be over there. And I donât want to be hard to find.â
âItâll be fine. No one there will tattle.â His tone held a finality that told her the decision was already made. He caught her hand in his, warm even through the gloves.
âYou sure?â she asked, shuffling her feet, nervousness creeping in.
âYou can sleep in my room.â He shrugged, as though it was obvious.
âWhat about your roommate?â
âWe donât have them.â
âOf course you donât.â She sighed dramatically, rolling her eyes. âFine. Just let me grab my gearââ
âIâll move it later. You look tired.â His voice softened by a fraction, enough to make her pause.
âYou sure? Because I canââ
âItâs fine, Y/n.â His eyes met hers, steady and unreadable, before he opened the door.
He didnât let go of her hand the whole walk across base. To her, it felt awkwardâtoo many eyes, too much risk of someone catching the gesture and whispering about it later. Dating on base was still a concept that rubbed her the wrong way; years of drilled-in rules made her instinctively duck her head whenever they passed someone in the hall. She tried to hide her face, pressing closer to him.
Keegan noticedâhe always noticedâbut he didnât say a word. He never called her out for things like that, never pressed unless it truly mattered. His silence was not neglect but acceptance, quiet understanding wrapped in discipline.
When they reached the STALKER wing, two guards stood stiff at the doors. One stepped forward, blocking their way. âShe with you?â His voice was clipped, all business.
Keegan nodded once, pulling her ID from his vest pocketâhe hadnât bothered to give it back earlier. He handed it over. The guard scanned it, eyes flicking to Y/n with measured suspicion. Her stomach knotted, suddenly feeling like she was trespassing on forbidden ground.
Finally, the guard handed the card back. âDonât go poking around,â he muttered before stepping aside.
Inside, the difference hit her immediately. The corridors were brighter, the walls cleaner, lined with offices and briefing rooms that spoke of authority rather than clutter. She stuck close to Keegan, acutely aware of every person they passed. His pace never faltered, his grip on her hand steady, until they reached the barracks section.
He swiped his ID, the lock clicked, and he held the door open for her.
His room was simple, but leagues ahead of hers: one bed, not two, with a mattress that actually looked like it had depth to it. The floor was clear, everything organized with military precision. Even the air smelled differentâcleaner, sharper, like the faint scent of gun oil mixed with detergent.
Keegan released her hand and crossed to the closet, pulling out a folded blanket and tossing it neatly onto the bed. âYou can sleep here. If you need more, take the blanket.â He glanced at her, eyes sharp. âStay put. You wonât be able to get back in without me.â
Y/n didnât answer right away. She sat on the edge of his bed, pressing the heat pack against her stomach, sinking into the unexpected comfort of the mattress beneath her. Relief softened her face, and for the first time all day, her body seemed to let go of some of its fight.
She looked up at him and smiled faintly. âThanks, Kee.â
Keegan just hummed, lowering himself to the chair against the wall, mask tilted her way. He didnât say it aloudâhe rarely didâbut he liked hearing her voice, liked the rhythm of her chatter filling the silence. And tonight, he liked knowing sheâd finally get a good nightâs sleep before tomorrow.
âDo you need anything besides your gear from your room?â Keegan asked after a moment of silence, settling deeper into the chair. He crossed one leg over the other, posture relaxed but his eyes fixed steadily on her, reading every twitch and shift.
Y/n hesitated, fiddling with the edge of the heat pack. âOh⊠yeah. Just period stuff. Pads. And hand sanitizer.â
His brows knit faintly behind the mask. âHand sanitizer?â
âItâs unscented,â she explained quickly, shoulders lifting in a half-shrug. âAll women carry it. You donât want to smell like blood in the field. Easy way to tip someone off.â
Keegan nodded slowly, processing that, as if filing it away into one of the quiet compartments of his mind where he stored intel he didnât quite understand but trusted mattered.
âWhatâs your job on the team tomorrow?â he asked. His tone was even, but the intent was clear: make sure she was ready.
Y/n winced, biting her lip before answering with a sheepish smile. âDidnât catch all of it. Iâll probably get told on the chopper.â She laughed lightly, though the sound rang thin. Sitting there on his bed, boots still on, shoulders hunched, she looked awkwardâlike she wasnât entirely convinced she belonged in his space.
Keeganâs eyes tracked the tension in her posture. âDid you eat?â
âNot yetâŠâ She shook her head, sighing. âDonât think I want to. If I put anything down, it might come right back up.â
He stayed quiet, but his gaze didnât waver. He didnât press, so she filled the silence herself, words tumbling out in the way they always did when her nerves itched.
âStrong cramps donât mix with food sometimes. Iâve thrown up from my period beforeâplenty of times. Mostly when I was younger.â Her voice softened, as though admitting a secret. âOnce, I actually lost it for a couple months.â
Keeganâs head tilted slightly, a crease forming between his brows. Heâd always thought periods came every month, regular as clockwork.
Catching his look, Y/n gave him a tired smile. âIf a womanâs body isnât healthy enough to keep a baby alive, it wonât waste the energy. No egg, no period. My body was basically saying: donât even bother.â She adjusted the heat pack and sighed. âI was in the field for three months, eating scraps, pushing way too hard, everyone around me sick. My body knew it couldnât handle more.â
âOh.â His reply was soft, his gaze drifting briefly toward the window. Outside, the clouds hung low and heavy over the base, gray smudges of late autumn pressing the horizon.
âI canât decide if I liked it or not,â she admitted after a moment, voice quieter. âI was sick the whole time, but⊠no bleeding. No cramps.â She kicked her boots off the edge of the bed with a thunk.
Before she could even think about moving, Keegan rose, scooped them up, and slid them neatly into the corner of his closet. The act was simple, wordless, but carried the same quiet care as if heâd patched a wound. He sat back down in the chair without comment.
âNo.â She shook her head, correcting herself. âI hated it. When it came back, it hit so hard I was throwing up for two mornings straight.â
Keegan studied her, silent as ever, the faint dip of his head showing he was listening. His eyes flicked once to the clock on the wall before he stood. âIâll get your things now. Stay here. You wonât get back in without me.â
She frowned, shifting against the mattress. âHow are you going toââ
He lifted her ID card between two fingers, the lamplight catching its glossy edge. That shut her up instantly.
âOkay,â she murmured, sheepish, settling back against the pillow as he opened the door. The sound of his boots faded down the hall, leaving her alone in the quiet, with nothing but the steady hum of the base outside and the lingering warmth heâd left behind.
When Keegan finally returned, his boots thudding softly against the concrete floor, Y/n was stretched flat on her back across his bed. She looked out of place thereâgear still half on, arms folded loosely over her stomach, her face drawn with discomfort. Her eyes werenât closed, though; they were pinned to the ceiling, unfocused, like she was trying to stare down the cramps gnawing at her.
Keegan set her things down on the chair beside his desk. Pads stacked neatly, sanitizer set just off to the side, her folded gear placed with care as though he was arranging a kit for deployment. Everything in its place, ready for her when she woke. His eyes flicked back to her, silent, observing.
âYou want food?â he asked at last, voice quiet but firm. Sheâd refused earlier, but he asked again anyway. Heâd rather risk her throwing it up than let her face tomorrow on an empty stomach.
She shook her head. âIâm good. Iâll wake up early and eat before the chopper.â She turned her head, managing a small smile. âYour bedâs nicer than mine.â
That tugged a faint, rare twinkle into his pale eyes. âI know.â A low chuckle slipped out as he bent to unlace his boots. Each movement was precise, almost ritualâboots set neatly in his closet, followed by the careful removal of his tac vest, rifle harness, gloves. Each piece disappeared into its place as if the weight of the day was being stripped away layer by layer.
âWhere are you going to sleep?â she asked, voice tentative as her gaze tracked him.
He paused, considering. âDepends. Can you sleep tonight?â His meaning was clearâshe looked stiff, restless, far from comfort.
âI can.â She forced a smile, nervous but trying.
âThen Iâll sleep with you.â His tone was matter-of-fact, no hesitation.
Her head snapped up. âAreâare you serious? Keegan, I can just go back to my roomââ
He glanced over, voice dry. âYouâve shared a bed with other men before.â
Her face flared crimson. âIânoâI havenâtâyou canât justââ She buried her face in her hands with a groan. âUuuuugh!â
A rare smile ghosted across his lips. He tugged his mask free, setting it down on the desk. âNot like that. I meant for warmth. You and Logan shared once, didnât you? In winter, when it was cold.â
Y/n peeked at him through her fingers, her gaze catching on the mess of hair flattened from his mask. âY-yeah⊠it was freezing. Only time.â Her chest fluttered uneasily. She liked seeing his face, liked hearing him talk more than usualâbut it also made her stomach twist with nerves that had nothing to do with cramps.
âThen itâs not a problem.â He shrugged, as if it was the simplest solution in the world. Without another word, he pulled off his fatigues, switching into gray joggers and a dark t-shirt. His movements were efficient, unbothered. He tossed her a folded sweater and her pajama bottoms. âHere. Change.â
Her cheeks went hot again, but he turned his back, giving her space. She hurried out of her day clothes and into the soft fabric, tugging the sweater down around her thighs. âOkay,â she said quietly.
He turned, gave her a brief nod, then guided her gently to sit. His hand was steady on her shoulder as he nudged her down into the mattress. The blankets were drawn over her, and then another tossed on topâextra weight, extra warmth. He slid in beside her, settling on his back with his arms folded loosely across his chest, but his head turned toward her.
She stared at the ceiling again, eyes wide, clearly too restless to drift. He noticed.
âTell me about your family.â His voice was low, coaxing.
Her eyes cut toward him, brows rising. Sheâd told him fragments before, scattered details. Never the whole picture.
âCome on,â he pressed softly, elbow nudging her. âI want to know.â
âOkayâŠâ She took a breath, eyes softening as she thought where to start. âIâve got three older brothers, a younger brother, and a younger sister.â Her voice steadied as she went on. âAll my brothers joined the military after ODIN. Except the oldestâhe vanished. No MIA tag, no KIA confirmation. Heâs just⊠gone.â She sighed.
Keegan hummed, the sound low and encouraging.
âMy sisterâs a nurse, civilian side. My parents were in Austin when ODIN hit.â Her tone flattened, rehearsed, grief long dulled into fact. âTheyâre gone.â She drew in a slow breath, then smiled faintly. âWe had a dog once. Roadkill.â
Keegan blinked, turning on his side, interest flickering. âRoadkill?â
âWe found him as a puppy eating roadkill. I was thirteen.â She chuckled, the memory warming her tone. âHe got old and fat and died of it, I think. My sister swears he was perfectly healthy, just age catching up. Havenât had a dog since.â
âMmm. Weâve got Riley,â Keegan said quietly, his eyes watching hers.
Her face lit in a grin. âOh yeah. Logan and Hesh loved bragging about himâlike he was their kid.â She yawned, curling onto her side to face him. âI like dogs. Couldnât be a handler though. Would kill me if one died. But Iâd love to have one. Cats though? Evil. Selfish little things.â
A corner of Keeganâs mouth twitched. âOh?â
âYeah. Did you know they think weâre just weird, ugly cats? They bring us food because they think weâre bad hunters.â Her eyes were half-closed, voice lilting with sleepiness.
He smiled faintly, though she didnât see it.
âSleeping yet?â he murmured.
He exhaled through his nose, then wrapped an arm firmly around her waist, tugging her into his chest. She froze, face heating, but his voice stayed even. âWhatâs your favorite animal?â
âReally?â Her words were muffled against his shirt.
âI donât knowâŠâ She hesitated, the rhythm of his breathing steadying her own. âDogs, but maybe falcons. Theyâre strange. Strong.â Her voice grew softer, trailing into thought.
His hand began rubbing slow circles across her back, steady, calming, lulling her further under. She drifted mid-sentence, words dissolving into silence. He looked down once, finding her slack against him, breath deep and even, finally asleep.
Keegan closed his eyes too, content. He didnât need to say it aloudâhe liked listening to her. Even when the words ran in circles, even when she complained, even when she rambled herself into sleep.