“Try our thinnest pads yet! Thin pads for when you’re on the go! Everyone wants thin pads!”
Listen. Look at me. I do not want thin pads. I am not looking to do cartwheels I just need to make it to morning without having to throw out these sweat pants. The elevator doors from The Shining have opened. We are on the beaches of fucking Normandy. I need the thickest pad you have.














