@memoryoflost asked: “ i can see beneath your smile. ” from Aku-
prompts for emotionally stunted idiots
Of course Akutagawa would notice. He hated it, how the two had become so aware of eachother to be able to point out things like this. None of the kids had noticed, Mori and Elise hadn't noticed, hell - even Kyoka hadn't noticed. But Akutagawa did, and he wants to wring the other's neck for it
The air grows tense as he lets the fake smile drop, staring out over the fields that surrounded the orphanage. It was so bright and colorful since he was last here. Almost too bright. For someone such as him, who had crawled out of the darkness of hell itself - did he truly deserve to be in such a place? He lowered his head slightly so he wasn't blinded, a sigh escaping him.
"I need you to punch me." He says out of the blue as his hands clench into fists at his sides. He's shaking. "Or restrain me, or do something. I don't know what's wrong but--" He gasps for a moment before one hand is covering his neck and the other his mouth, his eyes flashing gold as if he was using his abilities. He didn't know what it was about today, but the Tiger within him had been so restless. It had been a month, maybe two, maybe even three - since he had last killed someone. Since he had let the tiger roam free. It felt as if he was keeping part of him within a cage, and today was the day it was going to bust out.
He didn't have his choker on him. Mori didn't like it when he wore it as he caused him physical pain. But that's the only avenue he knew to truly deal with the situation, hence his request to Akutagawa. He needed to feel some kind of pain, then maybe he could gain control of himself long enough to lock that beast up once more and figure out what to do about it later. But how long would this tactic work? How long until his next fit? Could he even stay here, knowing that these kinds of moments could happen?
"I-- I don't-- want to hurt the kids--"
His voice cracks as both hands grip the front of his turtleneck, then a low growl escapes from the back of his throat. He needed to run into the forest, or Akutagawa needed to do something - He couldn't hold it back anymore.