Jul 22
ellipsism
(n.) A deep sadness from realizing you'll never know the full story of history or the future
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ellipsism
(n.) A deep sadness from realizing you'll never know the full story of history or the future
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Look I remember absolutely nothing at almost all times. My brain just filters everything into the Memory Storage until the Memory Storage overflows and I get smacked in the face by some random memories from when I was twelve like the password to my account on a browser game website that I forgot to save to the browser
every once in a while I'll just randomly unlock a memory from our past and just. I don't know when it was, we don't remember quite where it was, but we distinctly remember a bunch of small ramdom details?? like for some reason I just vividly remembered running around a tree at what I think was a green house park area and I think Mama, my dad, and brother were all there and I know it was also a garden place and there were nice sidewalks and a pregnant lady walked past us and someone said something really rude and insulting to her for some reason(?) and it was really nice and sunny and warm but like with clouds and I simultaneously felt free and calm and child-like and also like I was being restrained or smth. but I don't know when or where this was at all. I remember Mama saying that that place is why she's always wanted a greenhouse. I'll probably forget all of this within the next hour.
why is my brain like this??
I know I have a bad memory, because of trauma and mental illness. But damn does it hurt to have to realize it sometimes.
Anyone else really bad at conflating information they fake in all at once? Like I saw an email from Etsy advertising birthstone gems and an email below that from my local theater with new show lists and my brain said "ah the theater is selling gemstones" and I continued about my day like that was normal
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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me: *remembers something a friend said two years ago bc I thought it was neat*
also me: *choosing dinner* wait what did I eat for lunch. did I even eat lunch???
Remember that time yesterday when I panicked for an entire 20 minutes about probably losing my wallet at/outside Jโs work and as a result we had the fastest no-nonsense no-unplanned-purchases-filled trip to Target of our lives.ย
...and then my wallet was just inside my car in a compartment, which I had put it in like 30 minutes prior but just forgot about?
Yeah, I remember that. Thanks, brain. Really did me a solid.ย