#megafarts

Emotionally bankrupt, physically unsatisfied and mentally unstable would describe my current mindset, with just a dash of tomfoolery thrown in for good measure

I would wish you the best of luck but I believe luck is a concept invented by the weak to explain their failures.

Gingerbread houses are nothing more than mankind’s feeble attempts at playing god.

"Excuse me, I wasn't aware I was living in crazy gorilla banana land." -Me after I throw up in the street

Everyday i just pretend really hard I’m not insane.

so I was at a friends house and her brother and his girlfriend were in their room and apparently they thought everyone was gone and so they started fricking and we walked back to my friends room which is adjacent to her brothers and we just hear this really loud orgasm noise and we just looked at each other and we were trying so hard not to laugh but it was impossible and now they know