Sun: "Human litter... It didnt have it before. Its lessened nowadays because... I think this... Murray?.. built some sort of... machine... to clean the waters efficiently. The machine scares me a bit."

Moon: "This thing (a knife). Do humans not have anything sharp on their bodies or something? Some teeth, maybe? This is a little extra, needing something like this just to cut something."

Eclipse: "Those underwater ships (a submarine). They get so far down these depths and I really wish they all just implode. Theyve no reason to explore so far down yet they do like its an obligation. There was also this one time with a human, prior me meeting my runts... it died out of shock by just looking at me. It was..." (Snort) "..hard to contain my laughter."

There aren’t many female demon slayers, so coming across one is rare. So when Zenitsu saw you for the first time? He was head over heels, immediately getting on his knees and begging you to be his. You’re used to people mistaking you for a girl, you’ve lived through it your whole life- but you never expected someone to fall in love with you because they thought you were a girl. You weren’t gonna correct him though, where would the fun in that be?

You’ve seen people treat you better as a woman but this was a completely different level. Zenitsu was worshipping the ground you stepped on, lavishing you in praise and begging for your hand in marriage. This was one of the most entertaining interactions you’ve had, and so you let him cling to you. Leading him on only to keep him at arms length.

“You’re gorgeous!” Zenitsu exclaimed, staring at you with heart eyes.

You smiled gently. “You’re too kind.”

He leaped towards you, trying to trap you in his arms. However you move out the way at the last second and he falls face first against the ground.

“Oops!” You said, feigned a sad expression. “Are you hurt?”

“How’s the ground taste?” Inosuke added in.

Zenitsu smiled at you. “Don’t worry about it (name)! I guess you could say I fell for you.” He winks, giving you an annoying flirty smirk.

You quickly learned that Zenitsu was a major pushover. He was (for lack of a better word) utterly pathetic. He was weak willed, running on nothing but pipe dreams and delusions before reality hit and giving up his mission on the spot. You’re surprised that with his mindset he even became a demon slayer.

However this unique trait of Zenitsu’s intrigued you. As you spent more time around him and your interest grew, you decided to test just how far you could push him. How much you could go without him complaining.

The bar was embarrassingly low.

You could walk all over him and he would thank you. You began to pity him. Just a tiny bit. As Zenitsu often clinged to you during missions and you didn’t show disinterest, you inadvertently became his babysitter. When Zenitsu wouldn’t stop whining, they’d tell you to make him stop. When he got on his knees and cried on the floor, it was your duty to get him back up.

One of your teammates groaned. “(Name)? Can you…” they gestured at Zenitsu stand at the end of the path, dramatically crying, hoping you’d understand.

You exhaled before walking over to him.

“Zenitsu?” You spoke softly, trying to coax him out of his sobbing state.

“NO!!” He exclaims. “Do you know how dangerous it is in there?

“It was you who said we’d make the ultimate pair, right? Together we’ll survive whatever faces us.”

“C’mon, I got you.”

He blinks at you, surprised. You find yourself surprised too. Why do you care so much over a broken toy? Whenever someone stopped being fun for you, you usually left.

“That’s fine,” you said. At least he was willing to go now. “I’ll be strong enough for the both of us.” You hooked your arms around Zenitsu’s legs, carrying him piggyback style.

He lets out a small gasp, shocked (once again) at your strength before instinctively pulling close. As you’ve never let him be this close before, he’d take advantage of the rare moment.

“You’re too good for me…” he sniffled against your back. Arms wrapped around your neck.

“It’s nothing really. Don't mention it.” You gave him a smile.

Spending so much time around Zenitsu led to you getting to know him better. Even with the issues of your active lying and Zenitsu’s worship of you. Eventually it grew into a problem though as you tried to actually know him from beyond the praise he’d give. Each compliment he gave you felt like poison to your ears.

And Zenitsu noticed. You weren’t sure how to confront this issue, and you sure didn’t expect Zenitsu to do so for you. He noticed from the sound of your bringing and how you’d hold your breath and wait for the moment to pass by. How your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes and the sound of your laughter was rehearsed, playing in the same manner each time.

“(Name)… do I make you uncomfortable?” He asked randomly one day, while the two of you were chatting at the butterfly mansion.

You paused. It was uncharacteristically perceptive of him.

“Of course not, we’re friends aren’t we?”

“I can tell when you’re lying.” He mumbles. And your stomach sinks. Your mind is just about to spiral until Zenitsu continues.

“…I don’t know which one is worse; You lying to me, or you leaving me.”

You don’t want to do either of those.

“It’s just- You’re a very important person in my life. I don’t want to lose you because of something I did.” He says. You look at him expecting tears, but he’s taking this conversation well.

“It’s not your fault!-” You immediately clarified. His self esteem was already horrible, you didn’t want him going around and blaming himself for things.

“I want you to like me before you decide you love me. I want to know you better and vice versa.”

He’d slow down, but that didn’t mean he’d stop loving you.

He wanted to change.

“…you’re important to me too.”

Zenitsu looked at you like you were his whole world, if only he knew how much of a liar you were. It was never meant to go this far. You never planned on falling in love with him, but that’s the thing with love isn’t it? It’s spontaneous and unpredictable love.

How much longer could you go on like this? Lying to him felt like betraying him, but would he still like you if he knew the truth? Both ideas made you sick in the stomach and keeping it secret was torturing you. And yet you had to know.

In the middle of a random conversation you had while journeying, you blurted it out:

“Zenitsu, I’m not actually a girl. I’m a man.”

He blinks at you, confused. Then it clicks.

His jaw drops and he’s absolutely SHOCKED.

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE A MAN?? YOU'VE BEEN LYING TO ME THIS WHOLE TIME?!” He shouts, shaking your shoulders and demanding to know the truth. Screaming at the top of his lungs while tears flow down his cheek.

“How could you trick me… I trusted you” he cries dramatically. “Luring me into a fake sense of security-”

“I didn’t lie!… about everything else, at least.”

You never bothered to ask if I was a boy or not.” You countered, trying to save some face. In reality your stomach was sinking.

Does this mean he hates you now?

You took a deep breath, more shaky then you’d like to admit.

“I should’ve questioned you more. Of course it was too good to be true.”

“…do you actually mean it? What you said?” He asks. His voice suddenly soft and sincere.

“-mean what?”

“Everything.” He says.

“yes- you’re important to me. Always will be.”

He smiles at you. “Then… I guess I could put the rest of it aside. As long as I have someone as beautiful as you to rely on.”

“-You're still a dirty liar though.” He teases, punching your shoulder.