marshmallowliquidpride
You're right. Part of the problem is that there's no paid leave or even ant leave for Father's. Which takes a huge toll. Because in other countries where there's family leave you get so much more time to adjust to family life. Where in America mom's have to go back to work after 6 weeks and dads maybe get the day off and thats it
marshmallowliquidpride
I became a mom last February and I've always wanted to be a mother and I love my child. I really don't have any complaints about Parenthood because I knew what I would be in for. However going back to work and dealing with all that stress takes way more out of me and it's the same for my partner. So coming home and not getting a minute to relax and then staying awake until 2am with a teething baby is hard. And if you're late to work too many times you'll lose your income
THAT’S SO TRUE, like.... maybe that’s also part of why other cultures (generally) tend to have a much smoother parenting experience? I didn’t even think about that but you’re so right, like it’s culturally reinforced here in America, it’s super fucked up, isn’t it? Good luck to you and your partner!
dovahnicky
I’m autistic but my mom treating raising me as this horrible messy nightmare and the way she talked about how awfully tiring and messy and stressful and shitty it was to be a parent to others fucked me up and made me feel terrible for years for being “hard to raise” and like I was a terrible kid
That sucks!! Like omg! gjhgjhgjh Heaven forbid you learn and adapt to neuroatypical children (like there aren’t countless resources from people who have also raised neuroatypical children gjhgh) and/or at least find a therapist or something to talk to if you really need to vent, I can’t even imagine saying stuff like that in front of my child, that’s fucked
protokol
yeah, i think another big part of it is the mentality that youre supposed to do it "all on your own" without enlisting the help of other people. there are some circles that look down on you if you work and send your kid to daycare, for example
TOTALLY!!! And it’s so weird too, like you hear that phrase “it takes a village to raise a child” and like, it’s so true isn’t it? I know some people can’t necessarily afford daycare or other assistance so they’re kind of stuck, but I feel like when you see those couples who are maybe able to... pass their kids to the grandparents for a night or two a week for a date night, or people who live communally and are able to all raise their kids together basically, like... I feel like they generally have an easier time than parents who just go it alone (whether by Foolish Choice or force)
I feel like that’s also culturally reinforced here in America too, we’re very individualistic haha (I don’t necessarily see that as a bad thing, but in cases like this I think it can quickly become an obstacle)
