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My flat is clean. Clean.

I'm over it. I'm over the constant anxiety and second guessing. I'm done. I've had it with the panic that fills my veins. I'm 19 and I feel like I'm 90. I'm always afraid or too shy or too quiet. I'm fucking done. I've had it. I'm gonna be who I want. I'm gonna do what I want. I'm gonna be how I wanna be. No, I shouldn't even say "gonna" I should say I am. As in, this shit starts now. No more bullshit. No more silly mind games with myself. It's time to pick my ass up and do the shit I wanna do. Boom. I've decided, I love myself. I decide that I am enough and anyone who thinks otherwise can see their way out of my fucking way before I show them. I am young, I am beautiful and I am capable. I'm new at a university and I'm going in to confirm my new job tomorrow. I get to keep doing what I enjoy, being a barista. How fucking rad is that? I love my body now so I need to treat it with love and respect. Its where my soul resides and it deserves praise and appreciation for all it has endured. My hair is long, thick and beautiful and I can make it any color of the rainbow I would like. I don't need anyone's approval, I don't need to please anyone else. I'm done with feeling like I'm always in the way. I have worth and value. I am strong and powerful. I can train myself to do anything. Mind over matter, always. No more constant apologizing for literally nothing. I haven't done anything wrong enough to apologize for. I am fucking strong. No one can take this away from me.

Alhamdullilah

So I basically had a cryfest 2014 about my weight so i'm going to start changing my lifestyle. I'm going to probably clean out a drawer or a cabinet in my kitchen and fill it with food specially for healthy eating. I'm going to try and take the dogs out for a walk when I wake up in the morning. I'm going to change a lot of things in order for me to be happier and live healthier.

TAYLRO LIKED MY POST THANK YOU GOD I JUMPED OFF MY CHAIR THEN STOMACH CRAMPS FROM HELL HAPPENED BUT IM TOO HAPPY TO CARE