Thank you for the lovely post, friend! Im not a map, but I do have pocd. I think the world would be a much happier place if folks saw that pedophile doesnt equal predator. It’s like saying someone who has an attraction to animals deserves to die for being in the same space as a dog, let alone owning one.
Anyway, I hope you have blessed days ahead. Take care!
i absolutely agree! 🤝 truthfully, i think it would do a lot of good for the world if MAPs and all paraphiles were treated as fellow humans and not scapegoats for society's ills.
thank you for the kind message, anon. you take care as well! 🩶
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I’m not sure how many have heard about the situation involving Sagutoyas, a well known animator in the WC MAP community, so far. But for those who don’t know, unfortunately there is a Twitter thread highlighting strong evidence that suggests Sagutoyas was involved in an online relationship with a minor. The relationship itself was not explicitly sexual, but was without a doubt a romantic one where they referred to each other as their “partner” The key information here is that Sagu was aware of the minor’s age, even acknowledging their concern about wider parties finding out about the relationship. Another key fact is that Sagu, again with the knowledge that this was a minor, sent them numerous NSFW artworks.
I am beyond disappointed to see this kind of behaviour from an artist I looked on with admiration, and I hope those affected by her actions are able to move on from this terrible period.
Edit: one kind person has linked the document in the comment section, thank you to them. Also, I apologise for not adding Trigger Warnings beforehand as the document clearly highlights pedophillia and features several of the explicit images Sally sent to the victim.
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[this is a repost to use pro para tags. original post with reblogs is here.]
DISCLAIMER: i am not a mental health professional and do not claim to be. these are my opinions based in my research, personal values, and compassion for my fellow humans.
note: i wrote this using 'pedophile' as a term, but from now on will be using "MAP" instead, since 'pedophile' is so highly stigmatized and often gets unfairly flagged.
Pedophile does not equal predator
so many people conflate the two terms, and it has caused so much damage for so many people. this is because you do not have to be a pedophile to be a child predator, just like how rapists do not have to be attracted to someone to rape them. it's about power, not sex.
pedophilia is a mental disorder that results in a sexual attraction to children of varying ages. there are specific types of pedophilia and it can only be diagnosed by a professional. having pedophilia does not mean you will become a child predator, just like having NPD does not mean you will become an abuser.
non-offending pedophiles is the term often used for anyone who has pedophilia and has not committed an act of child predation. child predation does not include creating or consuming fictional content of fictional characters (provided they do not resemble any specific child in reality, i.e. AI-generated images of real children; that is predatory and does impact a real child) for one's own personal enjoyment.
2. Getting pedophiles help is good for everyone
'imprison and/or kill all pedos' is neither an ethical or practical solution to the problem of child predation. even if you don't agree with me on the ethical part, it does absolutely no good for victims when pedophiles at an increased risk of becoming predators cannot get help for their disorder.
because of how stigmatized the disorder is, even seeking out therapy is highly dangerous. non-offending pedophiles can be arrested or forced to register as sex offenders when no crime has been committed. and legal trouble aside, people are much less likely to seek out help when they know it could destroy their relationships, ruin their careers, and ostracize them from their communities.
they may also avoid seeking out help because society leads them to believe they don't deserve help, or even that professional help won't do anything for them.
you'll see a claim saying pedophilia doesn't 'respond well' to therapy, but here's the problem: because pedophiles are so afraid to self-report, we barely have any actual data on them. combine that with not knowing the quality of therapy done in these studies -- if it's a safe, non-judgmental compassionate approach or more of a 'conversion therapy' type approach -- it's hard to definitively say just how effective therapy is for treating pedophilia. so we can't just discount it entirely.
3. Pedophiles can also be victims of CSA
we seem to understand the cycle of abuse with other disorders, but don't offer the same compassion for pedophiles. now, statistics seem to show that CSA does not increase chances of becoming a child predator -- but so many articles about this yet again confuse predator with pedophile, so it doesn't seem like we have exact data on whether CSA increases chances of developing pedophilia.
and this is where more research would really benefit us. do most pedophiles just develop the disorder for no reason? i find that a little hard to believe. but again, more data is needed. i just think it's important to keep in mind that trauma very often plays a factor in mental disorders, and pedophilia is diagnosed as a mental disorder.
4. Villainizing a specific group of people doesn't fix the system
isn't it convenient how abuse that happens in the Catholic and/or Christian church is always presented as one 'bad apple'? there's no need to examine the inherently predatory + victim-blaming structures at play in those religions, being enforced in a close community. because it's not the system, it's just the people!
isn't it nice that we don't have to think about the horrible conditions prisoners are put through because obviously those criminals are bad people, and bad people deserve to be punished? no need for prison reform or rehabilitation over retribution when the people deserve it! nevermind that those criminals could be innocent or, in many cases, were targeted because of a marginalized identity. nevermind that people are capable of change if they're given the means and space to do so, that everyone is a victim of something.
when you reduce the issue into a moral issue, into the classic Puritan mindset of Good Vs. Evil, you don't fix anything. you upload the status quo and fail to target the root causes of these problems, like a lack of mental health support, no universal healthcare, no sex-ed, poor education, no living wages, no support for struggling parents, censorship preventing certain topics from being taught -- every single one of these issues is a crack in a broken system, and i'm being so serious when i say saving kids starts in the home.
and why is that?
5. Most child predation is committed by friends and family
are there predators online? absolutely. but the internet is closely watched and there are professionals whose only job is to scour the internet for predators to keep them from hurting kids. which is why it's super important to teach people what to flag and what to ignore; a NSFW anime drawing of a fictional girl is not something to flag for and only wastes their time and resources, vs. flagging an adult soliciting NSFW photos out of minors.
you know what isn't closely surveyed? the household. the family. other closed community areas. it's exactly why most rape is committed by someone the victim knows rather than a total stranger; it's easier to get away with when it's someone you know, and especially if it's someone with incentive to not say anything (like their love for a relative).
so all of this outcry about 'pedos on the internet!!!' isn't even focusing on the biggest issues. again, a pedophile is not a predator. nobody is being hurt by whatever fictional media someone gets off to. if it's CSAM depicting real children, that's obviously different -- and that's something for legal channels to take care of. not vigilantes who insult real victims by calling a drawing CSAM (although most of them still use the outdated term 'CP' and don't like being corrected).
nobody asks to be mentally ill, and nobody asks to be a pedophile. and i think that's where we need to have more compassion. can you imagine being born with one of the most stigmatized, isolating, and legally punishable mental disorders ever? can you imagine hating yourself so much, for something you can't control, and having to see over and over again people hate you for it too?
there is no 'it's not your fault'. there is no 'it's okay'. there is no 'this doesn't make you a bad person'. just a relentless onslaught of all pedos should die, pedos dni, you're a pedo (derogatory), kill all pedos, pedos deserve no mercy, pedos should kill themselves.
for a mental disorder. i cannot imagine how devastating it must be to see activists speaking up for stigmatized disorders, saying that having (x) doesn't make you a bad person, doesn't mean you'll become an abuser, doesn't mean you don't deserve love and community--
and knowing that your disorder isn't included in that.
i'm not going to judge people for what they reblog. but if you do reblog this, i see you and i appreciate you. thank you. it's nice to see likes on posts like these, but very rarely do i see them shared. and i get why; this is such a polarizing, sensitive topic. whenever i talk about it, i still get anxious thinking someone will report me for, y'know, using my right to free speech. so i can see why posts like this don't get reblogs.
anyways, thank you for reading this all the way through. 🫶🏻🩶
