#manslation

Alternate Manslation: Gee, miss, that’s a nice life you got there.... it’d be a shame if something.............. HAPPENED to it.

Manslation: I like to say women should have equal rights because I think it makes me sound noble, or at least like less of a fuckin asshole, but then I go on to explain that women are naturally inferior to men and let you know for SURE I am worth less to this planet than a year-old dog shit.

Manslation: Why would you buy a brand-new woman when you can head on down to the used-woman lot and get yourself a nice, value-retaining human Camry?

Manslation = I'm looking for a fuckbuddy. I will expect you to be available when I'm horny. Don't expect me to be your actual friend, and certainly not to be there for you when you need someone.

Manslation: LADIES! I’M AMAZING. And ladies who don’t want me just don’t know WHAT they want. Because if they knew, they would want me, because I’m great. And by the way, I feel like I should just let you women know, because you definitely didn’t already know this: fictional TV shows aren’t real. They’re not! I know you were counting on Star Trek being a documentary, but it’s past time you learn the truth.

Manslation: I don’t understand firefighters because, like, there’s always going to be fire, so what’s the point? We shouldn’t even have doctors because, like, there’s always going to be sick people, okay? What’s the point of bathing if I’m going to be dirty again tomorrow? Why should I eat if I’m going to be hungry later too? Why am I alive if I’m just going to be dead one day?

hmm I guess the Manslator is either on the fritz or we have a nonsense in, nonsense out scenario.

Manslation: You expect me to act like a person with the bare minimum amount of human decency?? Ugh! That's way too hard. It would be so much easier if you'd recognize that I naturally have more right to public space than you do. Now fold yourself up like a fucking pretzel so my crusty flesh hackeysack can experience optimal airflow.